General provisions:
A – Whereas the saying “all is fair in love and war” is absolutely correct;
B – Whereas for war we have the Geneva Convention, approved on 22 August 1864, which provides for those wounded in the battle field, but until now no convention has been signed concerning those wounded in love, who are far greater in number;
It is hereby decreed that:
Article 1 – All lovers, of any sex, are alerted that love, besides being a blessing, is also something extremely dangerous, unpredictable and capable of causing serious damage. Consequently, anyone planning to love should be aware that they are exposing their body and soul to various types of wounds, and that they shall not be able to blame their partner at any moment, since the risk is the same for both.
Article 2 – Once struck by a stray arrow fired from Cupid’s bow, they should immediately ask the archer to shoot the same arrow in the opposite direction, so as not to be afflicted by the wound known as “unrequited love”. Should Cupid refuse to perform such a gesture, the Convention now being promulgated demands that the wounded partner remove the arrow from his/her heart and throw it in the garbage. In order to guarantee this, those concerned should avoid telephone calls, messages over the Internet, sending flowers that are always returned, or each and every means of seduction, since these may yield results in the short run but always end up wrong after a while. The Convention decrees that the wounded person should immediately seek the company of other people and try to control the obsessive thought: “this person is worth fighting for”.
Article 3 – If the wound is caused by third parties, in other words if the loved one has become interested in someone not in the script previously drafted, vengeance is expressly forbidden. In this case, it is allowed to use tears until the eyes dry up, to punch walls or pillows, to insult the ex-partner in conversations with friends, to allege his/her complete lack of taste, but without offending their honor. The Convention determines that the rule contained in Article 2 be applied: seek the company of other persons, preferably in places different from those frequented by the other party.
Article 4 – In the case of light wounds, herein classified as small treacheries, fulminating passions that are short-lived, passing sexual disinterest, the medicine called Pardon should be applied generously and quickly. Once this medicine has been applied, one should never reconsider one’s decision, not even once, and the theme must be completely forgotten and never used as an argument in a fight or in a moment of hatred.
Article 5 – In all definitive wounds, also known as “breaking up”, the only medicine capable of having an effect is called Time. It is no use seeking consolation from fortune-tellers (who always say that the lost lover will return), romantic books (which always have a happy ending), soap-operas on the television or other such things. One should suffer intensely, completely avoiding drugs, tranquilizers and praying to saints. Alcohol is only tolerated if kept to a maximum of two glasses of wine a day.
Final determination : Those wounded in love, unlike those wounded in armed conflict, are neither victims nor torturers. They chose something that is part of life, and so they have to accept both the agony and the ecstasy of their choice.
And those who have never been wounded in love will never be able to say: “I have lived”. Because they haven’t.
tags technorati : Technorati Paulo Coelho Paulo Coehlo Warrior of Light Warrior of the Light Newsletter
Funny that I should re-read this particular passage tonight… some how I find guidance in your words Paulo, and this community, when I need it. It is nice to be reminded that I am never far from the light, even when the darkness feels heavy. Love is always close, always possible and always looking for me with hope, just as I look for it with hope. We are all worthy, and everything will work out for the best.
Dear Paulo
I try to translate this convention into german.
Would you publish it in your blog or may I do this in my one?
Thanks and Greetings from Germany!
Raimondo
http://www.free-blog.in/LongForgottenSon
Love hurts, but sometimes it’s a good thing because it makes you feel alive…
i am deeply wounded.. my lover just disappeared without trace.. dunno wot happened.. both his numbers are ringing but he is not pickin up… no mails.. no text.. no calls.. been 2 weeks.. am goin crazy… dunno if i should wait for him… it hurst when theres no closure..
hey,
I can understand ur pain, but its better to let go…. Cry if u want, do everything, but u can never find out the truth if nature doesnt want u to. Live on with ur life, dont be too obsessed with him….. leave it to time and to God, surely, u’l get the result…
well said… if you mess up with nature rule then you will make your life more complicated…think that you are only allowed to love .. not expect anyone to love you…
Dear Zy,
I understand your pain so well! My lover left me just over a week ago. He disappeared, removed me from his facebook friends didnt answer to any of my msg or call. He didnt explain me why. A week before he left me I’d left him first,(because he couldn’t decide, did he want to be with me or not) but then he got me back with his the most nicest words i’ve ever heard from him, his nice and loving behavior. He sweared that he likes me and wants to be with me. It was hard, but just when I believed in his words, believed in me, that i can truly start to love him even more than before – he left me! I wanted to die.
I met him later, but he still didnt explain, why he’d done to me. Moreover after last night out he called me a whore, just because i was trying to forget him and i was dancing with others. How come love for me changed into such loathing for me?!
I try my best to forget him and live on with my life.
And I wish You All Wounded in Love, to be strong, very strong!!! What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger!
xxx
Zy,
I feel you, I feel your pain. though we all want closure, and want to know the truth, Its best sometimes to not know than to know the truth, that can leave you with an emotional scare. You can be even more hurt by knowing the “why” than to not know. I know it bothers you, but if someone can do that to you, it means they don’t care and are not worthy of the time you give them. Let go, do not wait, if he’s the right one, you will be together no matter what, but if not, no matter how long you wait, or try, it won’t happen. Its like putting a square peg into a circular hole, it just won’t fit no matter how hard you try. I went through similar, after a year and a half, someone I love so deeply, and thought that things were going great, one day, just out of no where decides he wants to be with someone else, and that that someone else is his future, that I was just one of his love, but not the end all be all, that I was a moment of love to him. It was so painful, still is to think that there is something wrong with yourself, that you are not good enough, not perfect enough. All those thoughts ran in my mind, but in the end, i realized it had nothing to do with me, and that it was just something internal on his end, and or, I’m just not the right cup of tea for him, and God made certain that we go our separate ways to be free to meet the right one. Its okay to not know, it may save you from a bigger heart ache.. Keep your heart open, free, and the right one, will not give you any reason to question, or feel uncomfortable, or leave you hanging there. Remember you are the prize, you are special, and you are rare, believe that in yourself, and the others will feel the same way about you…
HEY TANMEET, WELL SAID
BUT SOMETIMES WHEN YOU LOVE THE WRONG PERSON WHO LOVES ONLY MATERIALITY THEN YOU FEEL A PAIN OF WASTING YOUR LOVE ON SOMEONE WHO WAS NOT MAYBE WORTH IT
I just want to say that anybody who’s ever been in love can never lose. Love only gives, since it is a part of God’s manifestations. There is always more and more love. And after a heartbreak, one explores certain strength which you never know resided in you. And most importantly, it opens the door for even greater love in future… :)
Very well said. I have just been deeply wounded and after reading this blog and your comment, I felt way better. Indeed, I am able to unleash the strength I never knew resided in me. The pain was beyond description. And reading wise words such as yours has brought back hope and happiness. Keep them coming. :)
I wish I would of read this exactly one month ago. Anyways, I’m cleaning my own wounds now. And although I was cut deep, i’m glad I went through it, it made me feel alive again.
I really liked this short Act.
I recommended it to one good friend of mine, who quite needs such thoughts about lost love lately.
Thanks
Thank you for these wise words. I have recently been severely wounded, but reading this article gives a new perspective (one that I actually have somewhere deep inside but sometimes find it difficult to remember…) and makes it easier to go on.