In Brida, a book of mine that will be published in various countries (from March onwards), the plot is based on a love triangle where it is necessary to choose one of the people involved. My question is: is it necessary to choose or, as the book itself states, can we have more than one “another half”?
This book was released on March 3rd.
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Hi Paulo,
I feel the other half does not exist outside ourself. Love is like a mirage, the moment you go near it vanishes. That’s one of the reasons you don’t find happy marriages. In a love triangle you may choose one amongst the two or you can hold on to both of them. It does not matter, it is just a matter of what can keep you going. The only thing that matters is that the joy flows, it does not matter from where. Its just like using a prop.
vicky:
“in the end,the main female character discovered that she had two soul mates,but she chose one of the two men”.
Dear vicky,
I am totally disagree with it! It wasn’t Brida, who made the CHOICE! It was actually the magician! If you read the book attentively, you will see that Brida actually wanted to stay with him and even follow his Tradition instead of destined for her…But the magician deprived her of her right and made the choice for both of them. (It reminded the situation from the movie “Casablanca”, but the main female character Ilsa refused from choosing herself unlike Brida).
In my opinion, Brida should stay with the magician.
Bottledgreen:
“When you think and feel that you cant hurt anyone in the process then go for it or else you will regret for the rest of your life not showing your love to the other half you might be feeling.”
But how do you know if your feelings right? And can one of the halfs hurt another with LOVE?!
“is it necessary to choose or, as the book itself states, can we have more than one “another half”?”
Dear Paulo,
I think that if it happens so that we meet MORE that 1 half and we decide to choose and leave only one in our life – we at least should try not to destroy the life of another one or more…with this decision.
Love is neither calculable nor are there any general rules. Answers to this question can only be based on individual beliefs and experiences. Furthermore feelings are never statically and sometimes change without having control.
From my personal point of view I consider triangle relationships are complicated and therefore have no chance to be long-lived. I have no experience of my own – I never was in the situation to love two persons at the same time. I live together with my husband since 17 years and the fact that none of us ever intended to leave – in the contrary we had just renewed our wedding in the beginning of this year – shows me that we have found a good way to deal with each other.
This is what I think love is – love is basically, the water you need every day for staying alive.
Another thing is what you call “Schwärmerei” in German or to be enamoured. This is like drinking a glass of champagne – it tastes good and makes you feeling high, but you really don’t need it to survive. Nevertheless I like very much to have a glass of champagne from time to time, because it has very positive effects – you win enthusiasm and charisma.
Where the boundaries are between to be enamoured and true love – I don’t know – love can not be measured. I think there is no use at all to discuss how you would decide in a triangle situation, because I believe decisions in love affairs should be made out of instinct and not out of your brain – you cannot make a forecast. You have to let it flow and take it how it is.
And at last like everywhere in life risks cannot be excluded.
Dear Sibila Maria India,
I had a little bit of hesitation when affirming that you are from India, not to make a mistake but it is o.k. now, because I understood that you are, in a way, spiritually connected to the Indian culture… So am I; in another life I believe that I lived in India or I was a native Indian American, something like that… :-)
Anyway, the most important moment is what we are now, what we have become and what we can become! And I want and like to believe that now, more than ever, we learned to cherish Love as an eternal gift from God. It’s time for all of us to bloom! Maybe rationality doesn’t want to accept very easily, but our hearts feel that it’s time for spirituality, for the Light, for entering into another dimension, that of the Spirit! :-)
That’s why, dear Agnieszka, you should not be even worried that I might get upset. Why should I get upset anyway? :-) I like so much what you write, and I feel that the words come from your sincere heart. Keep doing the good work, my dear! I am really convinced that Love always takes us to the Light, Freedom and eternal Joy! Don’t have doubts about that; it will happen anyway, it’s just a matter of time and acceptance. What I don’t know yet is how many people will be included in this new enlightened world, I am not worried about me, but for the others as I want the whole world to be transformed for the better and saved from anything that is not pure but my heart says to my mind that everything will be allright because God’s Love is infinite! :-)
Lots of love, many hugs and all the best in the world,
Carmen Larisa
I have to worry that it will be challenging to maintain…It’s difficult enough to fulfill one woman and/or man’s appitite. It sounds fun…But..knowing it will only last so long.
Dear Paolo,
This question of yours have generated different conflicting results…each one of them correct in a sense.
Personally, my answer to your question “is it possible to have more than one ‘another half’?” I would like to answer this in the essence of TIME.Because then..my answers are totally different. Let me elaborate….
I believe that you can only have ONE ‘other half’ at any one time in your life. In a love triangle, this implies you are LOVING two persons at the SAME TIME. For me, this will not work. For me, this implies indecisiveness.Each one of these two ‘other halves’ probably touches you and fulfills you in different ways. But one has to really decipher who among the two is the one TRUE love, and who completes you the most. It is hard enough – this thing called love – between two people, what more if there was three at one time? or more? In the process of deciding which one is the ‘other half’, one must also take into major consideration how the other one feels about you. Because after all…love is a two-way street. And your love for the other- no matter how true and pure it is- does not guarantee that he/she will love you back. Your ONE TRUE LOVE needs to be a reciprocal relationship and it needs to be in a state where each one COMPLETES the other, and each half makes the other whole. If you have found this at one time, then you don’t need any other third or fourth half.
HOWEVER…..in the grander scheme of life and love…again i am talking in the essence of time : IN A LIFETIME…can you have more than one ‘another half’? Then I would say yes. Meaning…you can have several true loves/soulmate/another half…but NOT at the same time. It is very probable that you TRULY love a person at this moment in your life, but it doesn’t work out. So then…you close that chapter, open another one, and fall in love with another again.
It is clear that in the preceeding paragraphs..I was talking with my brain, my logic. Now it is the turn of my heart…and I ask my heart (and I am throwing this question to everybody) “If in the end, your soul comes face to face with your Creator and He would ask you : In your lifetime, among all the loves of your life, who would be ‘the one’ for you?” And my heart would answer…only one name…and then it will be true…because then my answer will not be bound by reasons, by society and by any rules….
Will your soul be able to answer just one?
Dear Carmen Larisa,
I hope I didn’t offend you when I used only your first name; I like them both too.
:-)
Funnny…most of us want love to flow…
I wander where she’s going to take us..??
:-)
lots of love
Agnieszka
“Another half”
In any fractional analysis, a whole which has been divided in two will always coincide with their half.
Even when a whole of the same kind is divided in two cannot fit on the first half.
In love and in any other forms, you, being the “half” of a certain “whole” will only fit in one and ONLY another “half”.
Sometimes, we seemingly fit, and we accept that as our “real half”; but in the long run, the salient curves and edges would be so uncomfortable that we burst out and say: “Let me outa here!”
Decision counts a great deal!
Thank You, Paulo, for this birthday gift to me:) (Brida was published on my birth day – on March 3). I needed it so much…
Dear Carmen Larisa,
I was born in Portugal and I live in Denmark, my father was portugise and my mother is Danish. As a grown up I´ve taken the middlename India as well because the spiritual traditions from India as well as from the Indian cultures in both North and South America give me so very much.
And Bottledgreen, love and respect are interconnected, they go with eachother. Discernment is necessary to be able to have the integrity to deal with whatever would be the best in the situation for all involved.I believe that if we really act from love in our hearts, we also respect the best for all involved.
Sibila Maria India
Dear Sibila Maria, you have a beautiful name, too! You are from India, aren’t you? I am from Romania :-)
I have always considered India an incredible country but since starting meditation classes at Sahaja Yoga, I am really fascinated about the spiritual power of this country and hopefully, one day God will help me visit it, discover its beauty! :-)
And you’re welcome, my dear, I am simply glad that the sweet words of a child managed to brighten your day! We should all pay attention to the child inside our hearts, too because he or she has some very interesting and useful advice for us about how to allow joy and love to flood our lives :-)
And dear Agnieszka, you are right, love has no rules indeed, it imposes no obligations, it is absolutely free! By the way, I prefer to let Love flow, under all aspects and no one can prepare you for what comes next, but I guess this is the charm of believing and hoping for the best!
One more thing, dear Bottledgreen, it is really sad when people disagree on Love and all other universal values. If people all over the world felt love, sharedwith an open heart, there would be no wars, no hatred, just peace, relaxation and joy! I still hope that one blessed day people will see themselves reflected in the others and then we will allow ourselves to feel eternal joy, without limits, we will feel blessed and worthy of God’s attention and protection.
I believe that only when we love without expecting anything in return, without artificialities imposed by others or even by ourselves, then we are really free, really the Light of the Spirit. Otherwise,what is the use of trying to be appreciated for what you are not?
Many, many hugs and all the best in the world,
Carmen Larisa
It amazes me when people disagree on loving. Loving don’t need to be a physical thing for me. I wish we could love as much as possible to everybody. But when we talk about commitment through marriage, I think we should consider the word called respect. When you think and feel that you cant hurt anyone in the process then go for it or else you will regret for the rest of your life not showing your love to the other half you might be feeling. I don’t know if I’m making sense here….
the third one is here to prove you made the right choice with the second and that you have far more imagination;)
Thanks
Love
Damien
Two halves are enough to make One.
Thanks
Love
Damien
Rainer,
Ahah!
You suggest 4?
:)
I haven’t read “Brida” yet, but it’s very interesting question. Maybe we are often confused when we meet our 1/3,1/4,1/5… thinking it’s our 1/2. :) I don’t think it’s possible to love, but really love, more than one person at the time. When I love someone, I feel completly full filled and there’s no need for something or someone else in my life in that way. I can be attracted to someone but it’s not the same, it’s not that happiness that makes me feel so divine and part of God’s universe. When I love my heart only belongs to the one I love.
Our heart has already made a choice, and if we have to choose it’s because we haven’t paid enought attention when it had spoken to us.
We have to be brave and follow our heart,that way will never be lost.
Muchos besos
Tanja:)
I think..the most important is to have faith and believe. Without faith u are already died.
Faith is hope…Hope in your dreams that turn into reality.
Eu acho que sim. E que…irá chegar uma época que as pessoas irão encontrar suas verdadeiras metades, mesmo, estando comprometida com outra. Isso tudo pode estar relacionado as várias missões pessoais.
Alí em Brida, houve um relacionamento entre três pessoas de forma que os três sabiam que deveriam levar uma missão prá frente, no entanto, o respeito pelos sentimentos do outro foi poupado aos gestos visíveis. Mas nos invisíveis, todos tiveram encontros espirituais, impulsionando forças entre todos.
Alí em Brida os três envolvidos não tiveram maturidade por livre espontânea vontade, porque ainda havia dúvida entre os três, exceto na compreensão àquela missão coletiva.
Nada acaba sem ter começado, quando, pela vontade de Deus nossa Fé por Ele é redobrada. Quem acredita, Deus não deixa desistir.
Beijos,
Mari Raphael.
Carmen Larisa, you have a beautiful name. I really thank you for your 5 year old pupil´s words. They are exactly what I needed to see just now.
Sibila Maria India
Dear Carmen,
Love has many faces and whether you have an innocent heart or not, it may not matter, love will turn everything upside down, anyway.
Love is unpredictable, untamed…
You can either fight it or let it flow…
If you fight it, you end up…empty, sad,..
if you let it flow, you have to be prepared for all the colors and shades she’ll bring.
Love has no rules…
love
Agnieszka
Interesting comments about a generous topic… :-)
Thank you very much, dear Mika and dear Yajna for your words of appreciation! :-) I believe that when you have patience and believe in the power of good, love always knocks at the door! Adults have the tendency to associate love with all sorts of impure things which are not really the pure essence of this beautiful feeling!
Let me tell you the version of a child, a pupil of mine who is 5 years old about Love: I know from the novel of love that a person’s love goes to another person and is transformed into a big red heart. Every man knows what mission has on Earth because his or her heart holds the knowledge of the mission. One man’s heart enters into another man’s heart and discovers what is there: love or hatred, it depends on the person. People have different missions, but also their missions can be very similar. Children teach grown-ups how to be children again, because the adults have forgotten this important thing in their lives. God teaches us the language of love, which for most of us is a foreign language! :-)
I believe that ideas like these represent the essence of Love as it is, simple, pure and really felt only by those who have innocence in their hearts!
May God bless all of us with Innocence, Spontaneity and Wisdom!
Many hugs and lots of appreciation,
Carmen Larisa
Yes, I believe we can have more than one “another half”. It might be a bit more complicated, and not as comfortable as when there are just two people involved. But just because something is not so comfortable, hard and complicated, doesen`t mean that it is wrong. That it is not worth fighting for. Just because someone decided that love and marriage between two people is the right thing to do, doesen`t mean it is always the way it should be. Love is love and sometimes love find its own way. Love is love, and it is full of surprises.
Love
Biedronka
..
Life..
is.. like a taste of wine,
when you’re alone,
it makes you lose yourself
and die..
it makes you fall in love..
….
I wander why we are so full of contradictions?
Are we all like this or just a few?
Or maybe I’m the only one…?
So strange…, when one minute you want ice cream and the next you want whiskey.
Can you choose? Can you have both?
Why is it that you want to feel safe one day, and the next…you want excitement?
Can two people live inside one?
?
Is it because everything is changing… and so do we?
love
Agnieszka
I’m with Karen, anyone who’s going to be with me, will give me their all. I’m worth it! I deserve It! I’m not settling for anything less!!! Being respected and loved whole heartly is a must! Because I know myself, love myself, and know my worth. Those are my rules:)
i have been asking myself the same question for quite some time now. i am lucky to have met two people whom could be my other half. at the moment i am in a relationship with one half, and i am very happy to be so. still the question keeps popping up in my head, can i have more than one other half? i don’t have an answer and don’t know for how long this situation will continue, but i do know that for now i feel blessed to have met 2 people that have a special place in my life.
Dear all..
I honestly believe that in one point of time, I have only one “another half”..
but over time, it is true, that we grow into different people, and sometimes the person that was ur half, isn’t anymore..
throughout our lives, it is only normal in my opinion, to have more than one “another half”..
Take care
Yajna,
now it´s my turn, your words make me smile, a big smile for you and for what you write about letting yourself love.Last time I wrote here, I wrote so fast that I misspelt my own name, this time I´m taking a little more care…
Sibila
Annie,
That’s why I think if you’ve (generally speaking) developed into your true self. You will find your true love (if that’s what you want). The more time you spend alone (without a significant other) the more you learn about what YOU want. As opposed to shaping yourself around the wants of another. This provides a more stable and emotionally fulfilling relationship for you in the long run.
You become self composed as opposed to a samples from everyone else’s playlist;)
You listen to your own needs first, diminishing all of your own insecurities; you can give more of yourself.
I use to play the clarinet. I liked the clarinet. However, after thinking about more of what I wanted I chose the guitar.
Basically to know something and to love something fully and completely, you must first know yourself. That takes a lot of time when you have an easy life…It’s not until you’re thrown several curve balls until you hit a home run. When you do and you do it all by yourself (without a significant other) it makes you stronger. Then you’ll be ready to fine tune a guitar, OR a piano. Bottom line is the more you know yourself the less you question what you want, and the better music you end up making. Personally I like to put “all” of my energy into one instrument. Before “all” is said and done I’ll be playing my guitar with my pink toe;) But I’m a VERY passionate person, I NEVER settle for so so;)
In my mind i have options. In my heart there is none. The other half. In the circle of Love. Is for me. The One.
Carmen Larisa – I truely share your thoughts about love as a positive. Pure and unselfish love will always have a positive effect on the world we live in.
When it comes to having several “other halves” I do believe it’s not only possible, but probable. Other people make us what we are. I believe no man can grow on his own. We need another soul to become the best we can be. We need the motivation and inspiration of others to evolve.
Different souls drive us to become better in different ways. To have a soul mate, a better half, doesn’t mean that it’s our only soul mate, our only better half. I strongly believe it’s a feeling that can be shared with several people.
Sometimes we meet people we’ve never seen before, and feel an instant connection. We feel our soul shine in front of and with them.
It doesn’t take a physical relationship to find other halves. It only takes an open heart and mind, communicating with another soul.
When it comes to commitment and romantic relationships, I do believe we need to make a choise. To keep in mind that we should treat others with love and respect, in an honest way.
I shall not try to predict the ways of Love.
She will take or give whatever she considers necessary.
I shall do well to follow her calling, without judgement.
That is beautiful
- I went to our local library last night and they didn’t have any Coelho’s at all!!
xxxx
Well, I always thought that people could have more than 1 soulmates. It’s just that they don’t necessarily have to be significant others. It could be your best friend, your family, or even your pet.
But in love (as in between a man and a woman), I agree with Rainer above: three is not a stable number.
I can’t wait to read the book.
cheers! =)
Margie
Annie and Sibils,
Thank you for taking the time out to reply to me, it is much appreciated.
Annie, i really loved your story. It holds alot of truth in, and has given me more of a perspective into loving more than one individual completely. I have been a character who has always believed in one love that could last a life time- as fairy tale as it sounds, i felt a love that existed like that, and i think i will love him forever because only i and him know what we shared. However, now i’m beginning to see that just because i love someone, it does not mean i cannot love someone else- because as you have said, love exists in many forms, although they are not the same, it does not mean they you love less, just merely differently. I suppose because i was hurt, i lost sight of many things, and now i find myself remembering who i am, discovering what i love and focusing more and more on what i desire as an individual. I’m got to give this ‘break up’ (i don’t like this term) so credit, because my goodness, have i grown over this time.
Sibils- I admire your honesty, and the fact that you were willing to share a bit of your life with me. Truthfully, there was one line that just got to me in your response- Would it be possible for me to share my self as freely with somebody else if my heart called me to do so? If my heart called me to love someone else as deeply, “I hope I would dare.”
I read this and i stopped for a bit and smiled. I’ve been so focused on wondering if its even possible that i forgot, with love you don’t choose. As Carmen mentioned, you just love. Regardless. And i think if i am honoured with the opportunity, i will dare to love. I think that i should change my attitude a bit now, i’m going to stop thinking about love and its future possiblities, nor am i going to dwell in the past after all, what is done, is done. I think i’m going to try to just be happy. Do things that make me happy, and just love. Openly, anthing and everything. I believe this is my first step, to a healthier relationship. I have been doing this, but it seems recently i lost sight of it, so i, a working progress will start again. And well, if someone calls to my heart- I will dare answer. (whenever it will be)
Wow, i really love this place, sometimes on the most distraught days, i come and read comments and i am simply uplifted by everyone here. I love you all :)
MWwwwwwwahh
Yajna
You don’t choose these things I guess. Perhaps we might want to bring God or some of his assistants here to shed some light in the discussion, but if all comes to having the freedom of choice btw 2 soulmates, I guess we will choose the one who makes us happy with the least possible harm done. How about the one who reaches you? The one who throws the right arrow at your heart?
Life remains such a mystery. I guess we shall just have faith in our own hearts.
another point, can a person that doesn’t love himself really love anything else? some people find excuses in their lives to cover their mess, fine. what will you bring to love? hell? what kind of fairytale is that? sorry mate but you have to wake up, what kind of family, kids, will you have around? stop taking drugs and you will find your love, your happiness and your freedom. otherwise you are just a walking zombie, who is your love? heroin? is that whom you are married to? you are married to hell, in everysense. how can you say you love anyone? love yourself first, then think of the rest.
how can you speak of any love? selfdestruction is love? you need some MAJOR rewinding in your cells, life 101. love 101.
Dear Yajna,
I´m very touched by your words.
As you open up for coments from other people that Paulo, here goes my words to you. When I got married 10 years ago, this was a marriage that I entered with my husband because I then confimed that I decided to live my life with him. My focus and choice was completely centered on being with him, the man that he is. In that position I was and still am, singling the unique man that he is out and my imagination ws and is in what I want to be part of, being with him.
What I share with him is unique because of who I am and who he is while we share our lives. Our union is particular for the man and the woman that we are and learn to be, grow into being together. What I share with him is who I am because my heart calls me to do so.
Would it be possible for me to share my self as freely with somebody else if my heart called me to do so? If my heart called me to love someone else as deeply, I hope I would dare. And I sincerely hope to have the discernment necessary to be able to have the integrity to deal with whatever would be the best in the situation for all involved.
wishing you well, may you be loed and love.
Sibils
The longer we live the more alternatives…
There is no longer only black and white. You can’t never say never, everything is changing, there are no straight answers.
Life is a puzzle and so is love.
Dear Paulo,
I´ve read your precise question several times. As I read your words, they imply that our other half is out there, somewhere in the world. My intuitive sense is that my other half is an inner polarity in my self, as in my case I have a woman´s body, my other half is my inner masculine. As I personally am very inclined to sharing myself with one man at a time, I guess I would have to choose between which man to be with. However I have a friend of mine, a woman, who is completely and perfectly capable of loving and sharing herself with more men than one. As I see her, if she lived in a cultural context where it was acceptable for a woman to have a deep, intimate relationship with several men simultaneously, she would be totally able to live this, as that is how her deep nature is. I´ve seen her have two simultaeneous intimate relationships years ago, and she was perfectly in her own natural flow, her surroundings however were not.
I think we are at a time of learning so deeply more about what it means to be ourselves, what is means to be intimate and how we share love. Old forms of relating obviously no longer fulfill an enourmous amount of people. And choices are involved and will be involved. I´m completely sure it is possible to love more people at one time. The love that goes thru me to them is part of my own nature. The love that they might choose to give me is part of their gift to me. What I choose to do when I love a person, what I choose to share of myself with them is a delicate and important choice that I do my best to be conscious about.
with my reswpect
I’ve read all the comments before and I am still considering all the opinions… Each of them is right in a way, but the Truth is only one.
Each person is unique and perceives things in an original manner, still love is the same, the essence is the same but lived in a multitude of ways. What seems right for me, may not be so right for another person. We have total freedom to choose what is best for us as individuals and as a community and we should be aware of this important power to make a difference in our lives!
I strongly believe in reincarnation and I also believe that we had many life experiences, we had different partners, we were married many times and so on. It is not necessarily a question of commitment to only one person, because we had many commitments during all the lives we were through, but what draws you to a certain person is important, if you are at the same level of evolution or not, if you have similarities, if you associate to a partner because both can learn from that experience. It is not easy to maintain a love relationship the whole life, as people are under transformation, our personalities change, but love must be felt and understood as an universal value, free and generous. We should love what is beautiful, eternal and beyond ordinary perception, love for the whole humanity as a mirror of what God really is, the Spirit, the beautiful and enlightened aspects of everything. Love cleans all the impurities and just shines! Love has the mission to transform everything for the better and that’s why we take a firm decision to share our life with someone, because we both want to learn some important life lessons from the respective experience, we need knowledge of ourselves and also knowledge about the others, as a reflection of what we are in order to make peace with our inner selves.
I don’t want to associate love with jealosy and egotism, love triangles and so on, love simply is, offers and enjoys! The rest is not worth being taken into consideration. I prefer to put my attention only on positive aspects, those which make us grow more hearts! A powerful heart just loves, a weak mind notices only the flaws of everything…
I love “to love” what is good, beautiful, delicate and invincible at the same time and eternal: Light and Truth! :-)
Lots of affection and many, many hugs,
Carmen Larisa
some months ago i was reading a book where,in the end,the main female character discovered that she had two soul mates,but she chose one of the two men.Some readers argued with the author that this wasn’t true love,but she answered that this made that perfect true love even stronger because she had another option.If you have one soul mate and you want to be with your soul mate you have no choises,but if you have two and you want to live your present you have to choose.It’s a painful choise,but still a choise.But i’m still trying to cope with that :)
I’m an “ALL” or “NOTHING” kinda gal;) Most always I choose nothing, “it” has to catch me off guard;)
When I’m in, I’m in, no doubt!!! When I hear of others in doubt, I tell them to make sure it’s NOT because of a third. Instead, to take a closer look at their “ALL.”
Dearest Paulo and friends
I’ve been asking myself this very question for a while now. I love someone but the way our lives have changed over time, it made it very difficult for us to be with each other. We loved, but it wasn’t enough i suppose, because of the distance and other factors we could hardly communicate with each other, and well, we couldnt grow together. I’ll love him forever, even though i feel that the chances of us ever being together are slim to nothing now. I don’t even think i’ll see him again, and i think i’m learning to be alright with that. So, here begs the question, will i ever truely love again? could i ever get so close to anyone again? could i possibly find someone else who compliments me? The true is, i don’t know. I am hoping, that it is possible, because i want to live my life with love.. But i don’t know. It seems i’ve still got a lot of self exploration and healing to do on my part before that happens, but i’m hoping at the end of it all, i’ll find love again. What confuses me is that, when you love someone to the extent that i did, and give yourself completely to them, not physically, but actually merge your universes, so that you know them, you true know them, as they know you- how can you have that with two people? is it even possible? And if u do have that with one person, by discovering another person you can share it would, does that diminish your original relationship? The most logical explanation for this all that i could come up with, is that people change, and people grow, and as they change, they sort of fit with another person, and another person and so on. I suppose thats why it is so important for couples to continue to discover who the other person is, its because if you don’t, you lose sight of who they have become, and as much as you think that you two fit, you don’t really anymore. And soon, you realise that you fit better with someone else. Thats that best i could come up with, but it seems very gloomy. I just love someone who basically is now just a dream and i guess i have to let go, and i am hoping that one day, i’ll be happy with someone again. I think i will. Im still young and i’ve got a long way to go..
Paulo, i have a question for you-
As you can read, im fairly confused, with this particular problem. You’ve been married for years now, and its evidently clear that you love your wife and the two of you do share your universes. If you were to go back, years ago, to just when you fell in love, when you felt married to that person even though you havent vowed yet, when u knew that you really loved no matter what happens and you felt that you could nevre stop loving.. Tell me, in that position, could you possibly image sharing that with someone else? Sharing yourself to that extent with another person? Do you even think its possible? Sir, i would really appreciate your comment, and anyone else for that matter.
Thank you for being
Yajna
Yajna,
Read the Biography of Paulo Coelho written by Fernando Morais. It is called “A WORRIER’S LIFE, A Biography of PAULO COELHO”, Published by Harper Collins Publishers, 2008.
You will find the answer to your questions/doubts/fears/hopes/dreams. I thank and admire Paulo for his “Candid Confessions”, and once again for his humanity and spirituality.
Obrigado Paulo
Choose to love yourself its such a better triangle with me myself and I ..Love triagles never work you are either with someone or your not..Blessings Tania
Podemos tener mas de una mitad y cuando eso sucede toca sufrir. “Brida de Paulo Coelho.”
I always believed, that there can never be “another half”, that when you with someone, when you love someone, it’s exclusive, and it’s forever.
Nobody else can be involved. I would never imagine any other way.
I am not so sure anymore.
I guess it is much more complicated than that.
More than our believes, our dreams, our hopes.
I wander why love fools us so much.
Why, when we’re so certain, shows us the other side. Why, it is so mysterious, so strange, so… unknown? Why, when we are happy and safe, it throws at as something, to shake our existence, to mix up with our heads.
Confusion, that’s what she brings.
Can we blame her? I don’t know. Maybe.
I guess it is in her nature, to do that. Unexplainable nature.
She’s like a wild animal that cannot be tamed, cannot be imprisoned, cannot be…stable.
At least not for long. Why is it that you can live your whole life being in love with one person and then boom, it hits you. So suddenly, so out of the blue. No answer.
So…do we have to choose?
I hope.. we don’t, I hope that, love won’t mix up with our heads so much, that we won’t know what to do, or…we won’t do anything that we would regret.
Well, maybe it’s less painfull if we won’t. Maybe not.
I guess that’s life, and love it’s a part of life.
We never know what’s coming. We never know what it’ll bring.
That’s why it is so…exciting.
Exciting and… scary at the same time.
love
Agnieszka
Hello paulo,
three is not a stable number.
At first glance it seems to be a mathematical problem:
If you have more than one another half – let us say two for not complicating the example needlessly – you will have instead one another half another two quarters. The more another halfes will be added the more it becomes complicated – not only mathematical. I was never as good in maths in school and I fear in this situation I will be in danger to lose overview.
And on the second glance there is the question who will be your better half (or quarter? I’m totally confused by now) or are there two better quarters or one better and one best quarter???
I must have some more time to think about it.
Maybe I’m a dreamer, and I’m sure I’m not the only one.
Finally, be faithful to only one person may be equal to a zen experience. By now, I’m up to that.
Persons that can live a triangle would maybe say it’s a useless frustration.
It depends: since it does not harm anyone, we should live our sexuality, the way it pleases us.
Gratefully.
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