{seesmic_video:{“url_thumbnail”:{“value”:”http://t.seesmic.com/thumbnail/EKM7pkErNn_th1.jpg”}”title”:{“value”:”Magic or risks? “}”videoUri”:{“value”:”http://www.seesmic.com/video/7FIH1AY6n6″}}}
In Brida, a book that I wrote back in 1990, there are two ways to recognize your soulmate. Through Magic – meaning : entering a state of transe in which you can see a bright spot over the shoulder of your soulmate – or, by taking risks, by making mistakes, by being with the wrong people until you find your soul mate.
So here is my question: Would you try to find your soul mate through magic or by taking risks, making mistakes?
{ 236 comments… read them below or add one }
← Previous Comments
Next Comments →
Ooooh, this is music to my ears and a feast for my thoughts!
While I’m of the belief that Soulmates are found through taking risks and making mistakes. I’m *also* of the belief there’s an energy that is created. And shared. And felt between two people. In Sync. And I think it goes far beyond the concept of ‘chemistry’.
I’ve often said: “We all are truly spiritual beings and our souls touch easily and frequently. We just need to quiet our thoughts and ourselves in order to hear and feel it.”
~ Greeneyezz
Maybe what you’ve called ‘Magic’, I call it a kind of energy.
~ZZ
P.S. Can I just say, I LOVE the fact I found you on Twitter! :)
This was written May 28 – a few weeks prior to your question; after believing to have found my twin soul.
She desperately needed to know the why of it all – contemplated for days and nights on end – reaching inside, re-examining everything she knew of her true self, the life she’d lived to this point, and what little she knew of him. The process exhausting, as she traveled the outer limits, pushing herself farther than she’d ever gone – searching for reason, but finding only one truth; a truth whose acceptance could quite possibly lead to insurmountable consequences; a truth she could no more deny than the stars in the southern sky; a truth she’d been seeking the whole of her life; a truth that renewed her faith in God; a truth that made every moment of suffering worthwhile; a truth so enigmatic that a lifetime of anguish and shattered dreams suddenly made absolute and perfect sense – as the road leading to such ethereal bliss, could be lined with nothing less.
Thank you for posing this question and allowing me to share.
Peace,
Jill Terry
I would definetly use magic! No question about it. There is so much pain involved in doing it the other way…giving your heart to the wrong people time and time again slowly kills your soul and when you do finally find that soulmate, you are so skeptical that you don’t really get to experience the beauty of love in it’s purest and most innocent form…
I personally think the bigger question is not just how to find our soulmate, but how to keep our relation, how to keep shiny that magical spark, seen or not, for all those long years to come without falling in the habit of the common life, without loosing the magic between us. I think there is not only one soulmate; there is many peoples that can be our soulmate if only the two in the couple have the wisdom to manage their relation with love, with respect, with care one for the other. But there’s the problem: in the most of the cases, we don’t have that wisdom. And without it, there’s no two soulmates that will stay together for a long time.
I think the mistakes we make in the search of our soulmate is not in finding the wrong people, but in the incapacity to care, to nourish day after day after day that love we have in the beginning. And one morning we find the person laying in the bed next to us is just a well known stranger. We try to remember the feeling of the first day together, the feeling of the first kiss… and there is only emptiness. We both changed without noticing it. I think it can happen even with the perfect soulmate.
There is another thing: I remember a story, read in one of your early Warrior Of The Light newsletters, telling for a man who searched all his life the perfect women to marry her. Many years later he turned to his village and when his ancient friends asked him if he succeeded to find the perfect women, he replayed “Yes, I found her, but couldn’t marry her because she was searching the perfect man.” So we all have to keep that story in mind during all our quest.
There is another point, Paulo: we take for granted that we are the soulmate of the person we recognize as our soulmate. But isn’t it so impossible that our soulmate makes a mistake and don’t recognize us as his soulmate? What then?
Greetings from Puerto Rico Paulo!
I’m looking forward for that new book(Brida).
When you here the word MAGIC it sounds all so perfect and wonderfull and for me living in magic is boring. Why? because everything will be so perfect finding your soulmate that I feel that I would be bored and unhappy in that life. Ill find love by my mistakes, because mistakes means lessons and experiences. It’s like having the perfect relationship, it sound great but it’s always so good that people get tired of if but if you have a imperfect relationship It is also bad. Every couple has there fights and there good because you learn from each other and you learn from your own mistakes. I love being imperfect and sometimes even making mistakes because I feel like I learn from them and from myself too,it also helps me gain experience.
This is a great blog! I admire your talent!
Tiffany Mercado
Hola Paulo,
me gustaría conocer tu opinión:
¿Quiénes creen lo que leen en los libros y cómo influye esto al respecto en la vida cotidiana?
Gracias
I once had an experience where I was part of gigantic ‘being’ of light, which was made up of lots of tiny pieces of light, the rest was darkness.
‘I’ being a tiny, tiny particle of light fell away from the source, but other people I meet also have this light, and these people are my soulmates, even if I meet them only for a brief moment.
That said, I have a special soulmate, we have known each other for nearly thirty years, I didn’t use magic to bend his will or to try to find him, it has not been a fairytale, but it is part of my journey.
I don’t believe in love you can have any rules, every persons experience of love is unique to them, but what is important is to love and be loved in return.
Notre âme est au fond de nous que l’on prenne des risques ou non. Notre âme est une force divine qui nous permet de tout ressentir.
Même si l’on parcours dès fois un chemin difficile (pour chaque être humain c’est de toute façon différent – comme les réponses que les gens donnent sur ton forum d’ailleurs ;-)), notre âme est toujours là pour nous guider, la lumière pour nous éclairer, le coeur pour donner.
Lot of beijos
Claudia
Hello Paulo,
Brida is one of my favorite books from you and I remember very clearly what you wrote on the spark in the eyes and over the left shoulder. However when it comes to what I would prefer, I’m not really sure. My current relationship has been very problematic, so taking that into account I would prefer “la via rápida”, meaning the spark above the shoulder (although I’m still unclear on how to do this). However I still drive my personal life by learning and that only happens taking decisions and making mistakes… I’m sure I’ll be certain of what road to walk into in the near future.
Keep up this great blog!
Mario Rodríguez
I’m too afraid to make mistakes. taking risk needs bravery, and I don’t have enough courage to hurt everytime I’m wrong.
i don’t think magic’s really my cup of tea. Risk, perhaps, would be my way.
see here’s my theory. the soulmate moments are those that take ur breath away. but you can’t have that every moment every day (or you wouldn’t be breathing). so, risk is probably what you take first, and then magic’s what you find and make after.
i like making magic for my loved one/s. and i like going on adventures with them. but sometimes they don’t like that very much.
Dear Paulo,
I think, it would have been so much easier for me to find my soulmate through magic, for i have searched,taken risks, made mistakes, cried,but still have not lost the hope for it. It had altogether affirmed my belief to look for my soulmate& the kind of person he will be! I think i can now better identify certain characteristics of my true soulmate & rest is upto detiny to help me find it!!!!!!!! For God is in the word!!!!!!!!!!
Ur book, Brida, made me think that I may have the gift to be a wicca, for i have too experienced many wonderful, unexplainable things, whcih dont happen in normal lives, or if they do, then normal people dont notice them!!!!
I am looking for my soulmate, hoping to find the light over his left shoulder, the spark in his eyes, the joy of being complete at last!!!!!!!!!
Also, life is a journey, mine being till date a magical one, the kind I have survived,its a miracle, I am still alive!!!!!!!!
I believe in true love& yes magic along with taking risks, will certainly help me to find my soulmate!!!!!!!!!!!!
With Love,
Binny
Bonjour Paulo, je crois que je ferai tout pour trouver mon âme soeur, mais cela dépends du tempéramment de chacun ,personnelllement je préfère la magie, les signes… Et si c’est mon âme soeur pas besoin de courir je la trouverais qoiu qu’il advienne je fais confiance à la magie de la vie…
… and I told my friends: I love it over here but still I am very homesick. I need you. And I am not doing well.
It was so hard.
Marisa
oh and I have to risk it and meet him in person^^
On Friday when I visit the selfhelp-group for anxiety patients I hope to find out more about this illness.
I have never been so happy – I feel free and I know that I will overcome my fears. And that my soulmate will help me.
And on my flight home to Germany in October I will read your new book. I am just not ready for it, yet.
Marisa
Dear Paulo,
I know that this comment is one out of a million. But I do hope that you read it.
I am 22 years old and my life story is full of fear. Fear to fail, fear to just “be the change you wish to see in the world”.
On Monday, 16th of June, I had an anxiety-attack. By now I am in San Jose California attending an internship at a school. I want to be a teacher.
When the doctors told me it was anxiety, I did not understand why – because I am not afraid^^ I love life so why should I be afraid?
I am. I just did not know. All my life I thought that I was not good enough. I have overcome 3 of 4 obstacles. By now. I read the Alchemist two weeks ago.
The 4th one was fear.
I know what I was afraid of.
To say: help me.
I can say I love you or yea you’re my best friend, and hey, I’ll be there for you and I can even say I am sorry.
I have real friends – I can feel them. And I have found the love of my life – well, he found me and guess what. I just know him through emails and pictures. When I had the attack, I thought I had to die – but I knew it is not time yet for there is a plan, there is a sense behind all the pain I am going through.
I could never say, please help me. I need you. I am weak.
I always thought that I have to be perfect. Nobody expected this from me.
I was afraid to say – I cannot do it.
I sent emails today. To say I am sorry that I showed you your fears and told you my opinion about you – and I am sorry that I didn’t hug you.
Paulo, I always told my friends “I have experienced so many good and bad things in life, man, I could write a book”.
I have to write this book and I want you to know what I think about finding and meeting your soulmate:
1) your soulmate finds you – by magic. You ask yourself, why is this happening and how can this be …? Since today I crossed the words “why” and “how” and “because” out of my vocabulary.
I just enjoy the excitement. It’s like Christmas, when you cannot wait to open up the gifts. And once you did, you are some kind of disappointed. Not because you didn’t like your gift but because the magic has gone. Once you know why and how, the magic is gone. I stopped thinking about why God is doing this and that. I don’t care anymore.
2) When your soulmate finds you it doesn’t necessarily mean that you actually met him – in person. I haven’t yet met him. In person. And yes I am afraid because I don’t know if it is going to work out.
But what could be the worst thing that could happen?
That it does not work out.
But still, life goes on. And I love life. I will not get depressed because I am a anxiety patient now – even though the doctors said this can happen. I am too afraid too die ;-)
I will go through this fear and all the pain – and I will try to relax. And therefore I have to write this book.
I hope I could answer your question – though there is never only one right answer.
Thank you for the Alchemist.
Marisa
I have found my soulmate after quite some years of wandering off, expecting nothing but hoping for everything at the same time. But sadly, as soulmates sometimes go, it is not for this lifetime that we are meant to be united. With this, I am truly devastated.
Meeting soulmates by chance helps staying pure in the relationship.
If magic is envolved from any side, a lot of things can go wrong. Maybe except divine magic, or God’s will, or carefully following the written Path can let us stay happy together and in ourselves.
That’s what I learned through mistakes and much pain.
I am sure that eventually all the soulmates join. :)
I believe in destiny and I believe that everybody have their soulmate. So I was looking for my soulmate through making mistakes. And finally I find what I was looking for. :)
My Soulmate of my past and present life suggested Brida to me. In my mind, the only feasible way to find your Soulmate comes from trial, error and mistakes. To me, the magic option would be the easy way out!!!
Who we are now has been shaped and defined by all we have been in the past……
Yes, dear Paulo Coelho, I will try magic and look for the light over the left shoulder, to try to finally find my soulmate, because i have failed the usual way, as far as I recognize:)
Thank you for your thoughtsin all your books:)
Mr. Coelho,
Thank you for this great question. When I heard it, I recalled a quote I recently heard and that is, “The journey is primary, the destination is secondary.” I would absolutely choose to find my soulmate through risk and mistakes because these are all part of the journey I agree with many others who believe that it is possible to have several soulmates throughout our human experience. The idea of finding him/her through magic seems almost like getting the answers to a puzzle or test before we have solved it for ourselves. There is no joy or growth in that.
Many blessings and thank you for your great work!
Vickie
You can wait your whole life to see that bright spot, and not finding it. Would you then regret not choosing the other path?…
I won´t try to find my soulmate by using either. I believe I am with my soulmate when I´m suppose to be. I trust that I recognize the experience with the same kind of awareness that I´ve been given to be able to recognize other crucial experiences.
All throughout history, humans have learned by making mistakes. We have made mistakes that proved fatal to some, this is true, but many mistakes that have had serendipitous results. None the less, all of our mistakes lead many of us to wisdom.
I’ll stick with my mistakes…they have made me more compassionate and that much wiser, and I hope, closer to divinity.
Molly
Paulo, I already tried to find my soulmate making mistakes, now I’m 46 years old, I’ve grown spiritualy, I am on the right track in my life, now I like to find my soulmate through magic, I am not willing to be in a relationship unless is with my soulmate!
Love and Light!
Anneliese
Personally, I’d have to question soulmate as a concept.
Taking risks are magic because it’s why we are always growing inside and everyday ;-).
Whishing you all the best ;-).
Je t’embrasse
Claudia
Sometimes we might find magic in a risk taken. This might sound too cliche (or corny) but I always believe, come what may, that maybe God wants us to meet the wrong person or people so that when we meet the one we’ll know how to truly appreciate him/her. We might make mistakes. We might meet the right kind of wrong ones but each people that we’ve encountered in our path directly or indirectly turn us to be even more beautiful and meaningful being. I’m wondering if we let the magic rules, would there be a room for rationality?
is it needed a special ability to learn the magic on finding the soulmate or ordinary person can possibly do that? if yes, then i’d like to learn how the magical techniques works… I’m tired of making mistakes, being hurted and other inconvenience feeling for the soulmate seeking journey.
Dear Paulo,
two months ago I read Brida and it gave finally peace to my soul. I am Magus, though I am woman and he my Brida changed several girls to find soulmate, now at least he thinks he did.
But I know that we are soulmates !!!
Destiny crossed our paths when we were too young, from two such different worlds…and at that time we did not recognize the force that kept us imprisoned, we wrote endless letters, we crossed distances in kilometers, in mentalities …and somehow we went different ways !
I loved, I love and I am loved and unlimited peace and happiness filled my soul after reading your book and finally gave me freedom.
After all this I vote for risk !
Whoever is still crying for lost love my advise is to read Brida !
The distance does not mean empty heart, on the contrary it
cristalizes the best !
Dearest Paulo, thank you for all, for Brida, for Illeven Minutes, for The Light you are emanating through your work.
Love
Luce
Of course I choose the magic, though Im not able to see the bright spot but Im sure there are outher magic ways to find my soulmate.
Magic or risk? Can I choose both? That way, It could never go wrong… How I wish. :)
My soulmate is the one who encourages me to take risks and to make mistakes. He understands the journey I have made to find him. If I am to meet him without risk then I feel that I have not truly lived. I would not know myself or my heart, and at the time of our meeting I would have nothing to offer.
Much love, Suzanne
Dear Paulo, Thank you for the live blog!! :)
This is a very tough question…
Expressing and giving love is learned through experience which is essential for growth.
Being a free spirited person, I would put off using the magic, I would definitely take the risks, and when I felt that I was ready, personally, emotionally and mentally, I would definitely use the magic! :)
Love!
Hi Paulo,
Definitely be a risk taker. (On the other hand, who said that magic was easy anyway. Imagine the hours of practice and all the rituals that one has to go through in order to obtain such powers to find your soul mate. Like if that wasn’t a risk already.)
In any case, I believe that magic, as tempting as it may sound, will only come upon to those who choose to take the risks of life, such as meeting the wrong people, experiencing mistakes, disappointment and pain. Only after that journey has come to an end and you realize that the right person is with you, then the immensity of love will fill your soul and one will see that a word that could express such feelings of joy would be…..magic.
being in love is like a magic, but this doesn’t give us assurance that he/she is the soulmate we are looking for. when we feel something to a certain person we often think that this is it (the soulmate we’ve been looking for) that instant feeling is magic (we are in trance), but during that time we are also taking the risk because when you get to know each other and you finally see that you have differences….so i think i’ve accepted the fact that finding one’s soulmate is like a magic and at the same time we are taking risks coz’ we may find out after all that is not the soulmate we really look forward to…. (did I make sense here??? i don’t know…)
I was waiting for so long to read this book, anticipating what might be about and…it’s so fascinating…so magical.. and..sad.
Soulmates…
as the book states you can see it in someone’s eyes,
and..you can feel it inside, there is no magic needed to recognize, to know..
the sad thing is..to have more than one..
love
Agnieszka
When i was a kid i believed a prince charming would come on his white horse (i admit i must have listened to too many fairy tails).
When i was a teenager, i wanted to have a boyfriend simply to be like any girl. I think i was not looking for love but rather for a person on which i could simply say: he is my boyfriend. I was thinking about boys a a possession.
I was not a popular girl or even the kind of girl girls looked at. I remained single until my 17eens. I finaly had my first boyfriend. It did not last but i was able to say that i did experioence having a relationship. That was what i wanted after all, wasn’t it?
Well, after that i had other boy stories but no love stories.
Now, i want to find love because i know i need it by my side. I want to be in love, not to just be with someone just for the sake of if.
I used to make mistakes in my search because i wxas not looking for the right thing.
Now, i do believe on what is named magic. I prefer to say that i prefer to say that i believe in destiny. I believe that life will place Love on my lifepath. I don’t know how, i don’t know when. I just pray that i will have the strenght or power to identify this Love.
It is very easy to take the first step that is to go through the magic and just wait to see if a person is really a soulmate. But at the same time it is difficult to go and check, do mistakes and try until a right person is met at the end.
One will surely chose the first step and think something automatically happens for him, I think if I was the person to choose the soulmate I will rather go for the second and take risk because once I take the risk I will be doing the mistakes and at the same time I will be learning something new from each and every women I try. It is a process to find the right person in life.
I do not believe there is any soul mate or black mate or white mate only because there is only one thing existing in this world and that is a mate. The rest is to us, by which name we call them. We can call her as a soulmate but what is the proof that a person will really be a soulmate and not leave you after a while.
A man has no mate except a mate who is himself. A girl in his life just bring a momentary joy which we can with some name. However, even though the magic is easy I will not suggest anyone to go and see the white bright light over the shoulder just to find a true partner in life rather go and talk, enjoy, fight, laugh, weep, get angry, feel sad and feel happy by taking risk in life.
Life is magic.
Being alive means taking risks.
I choose life.
One question, Paulo how did you find out about the light over the shoulder, is this a real ritual?
To be honest this thread freaked me out. Not only am I reading Brida but I am also in the process of confirming whether or not I have discovered my soulmate. I have seen a light over his RIGHT shoulder. What does that mean?
I would go with the first option, the ritual. I’m attracted to all things spiritual and I would like that confirmation that I have found my soulmate to come from the spirit or magic rather than the ego. I think that is all part of my growth as a soul. Your soulmate or twin soul should be the one who helps you grow as well as teach you acceptance.
Paulo, your books have been with me for so many years. Many things have changed in my life but the spiritual “kick in the butt” I get from your books have been a constant. At the moment “By the river piedra I sat down and wept” “Eleven Minutes” and “Brida” reflect all in my spiritual and emotional life.
If I knew the ritual of the light over the left shoulder was real, Id be willing to embark on that journey.
Paulo,
Once in a state of peaceful soul I have seen a stranger in the mountains, he was sitting near the fire lookng at it. he also had a string of beads in his hands, and his head was covered with a shabby hood. when i approached to the fire to get warmth, he glanced up and i faced his eyes, speaking for themselves, forceful and full of deep pain, warrior paths and restrained love and tender that i have never met before..
Since that time i am calling for him with the first thought in the morning and wishing him easy dreams at nights, where ever he is. Every day a modern human being can meet dozens of people, they all have expectations, wishes, hystories and obligations. But among all of this flowing crowd one can always recognize those eyes.. They are the ones of a soul mate.
I believe that i ll never stop searching for them, even if takes years, or centuries..
I believe that its the nature and the universe that will screem to you that this is your soulmate. wether by magic, experience or signes of the sky
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
- Rumi
Yes, but I doubt that just seeing a bright spot over the shoulder of my soulmate will awake love in my heart for him. We need to look and to explore, because, how else will we know who we are and what we need? Although by seeing a bright spot over the shoulder of our soulmate we recognise him, he’s still a stranger for us.
saludos de Belgrado
Tanja
Without hesitation i have. I am. I will.Kissed.Kissing.Kiss. Every cute frog. Until……..SMACK<3
i think if u knew that someone was ur soulmate just because some strange illumination over their shoulder tells u it is so….that would be so boring!
i mean where s the fun n the whole gamut of emotions that ones goes through during all the stages of love…….right from the first sight, to the queasiness in the stomach wen u talk to them, to the pounding of the heart each time u suddenly see them unexpectedly, to actually getting to know the person and then discovering something adorable, something quirky , something annoying about them every single day, through time….now thats fun.
and so wat if u have to take risks….it is only through experiences and finding out wat u dont want that u will actually discover wat u DO want. until one day it won’t seem like a risk at all…..wen ur instincts will begin to steer you and tell u wen u ve met ur soulmate :)
I think that by taking risks and making mistakes, someone acquires knowledge and most importantly finds himself/herself. This is the key and the preparation in order to find the soulmate. The lessons someone gets through the risks, makes him/her find his/her soulmate. Magic is not for sure. It may exist, it may not. What we learn is what we carry with us. And that’s the point. We SHOULD learn from our mistakes.
Well…with a first thought I would easily answer through magic (if I could practice magic ofcourse), so that I would escape from all the pain and dissapointments that I would meet in the quest for my soulmate….BUT….Having second thoughts I believe that finally I would choose the hardest way, because if I didn’t, then I would have lost the real magic of the whole process, which more or less is the actual meaning of life.
Hi Paulo,
Iam on my journey through Australia this year. I left home 9 months ago and with that my what I can sense soulmate. Iam 22 and still feel every day for her.
Iam coming home soon to meet my parents at the airport before I will leave Germany three days later to France and the Camino to Santiago. I was inspired by you many years ago, when you first published the book about your pilgrimage. Iam very optimistic and happy about my decision to go that way of almost 1000km to Finestre on the Atlantic.
After I will return Iam gonna see if God wants me still be together with that girl which is my first big love in live.
I think about her every day and thank god for the present of love that he gave to me.
With her I met God, who change my whole way of live and thinking.
On this journey through Australia I have met a lot of girls. Felt in love with them and everything else. But that was only Fast Food and hurts in your stomach sometimes like it is the way with bad food. So after these many experiences, I hope God is showing me somebody where I can rest and refresh from these experiences and with who I can experience real love, on a spiritual and physical way.
Your books helped me over some times here in Australia and Iam very thankful for you that you made the decision to become a writer to share your trully moving insights with us.
I never felt a stronger connection to an author before than with you.
Thank you Paulo for having you on this planet!
Keep on writing!
Kevin
today travelling through Melbourne, a real pleasant and highly cultural city!
← Previous Comments
Next Comments →
{ 1 trackback }