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Today is late Sunday and I just returned from the show of Madonna. And what did I see? A young 50 year-old dancing like a child, a queen, a teenager.
It got me thinking about the fact that I believe we are aging differently from the previous generations. I remember for instance my parents at the age of 50 and they were already old, and more importantly they considered themselves as already old.
So what’s your opinion on aging? Did we change our perception of how to get old?
UPDATE 24 SEPT
I am very surprised on how many comments this post is having. Therefore, I am sharing here a poem by Jenny Joseph:
When I am an old woman,
I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn’t go,
and doesn’t suit me.
And I shall spend my pension
on brandy and summer gloves and satin sandles,
And say we’ve no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
and gobble up samples in shops
and press alarm bells
and run with my stick along public railings,
and make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
and pick flowers in other people’s gardens
and learn to spit!
You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
and eat three pounds of sausages at ago,
or only bread and pickles for a week,
and hoard pens and pencils
and beermats and things in boxes.
But now we must have clothes that keep us dry,
and pay our rent
and not swear in the street,
and set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner
and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me
are not too shocked and surprised
when suddenly I am old,
And start to wear purple!
I am wearing purple to-day – like the Arch bee chope -
dancing, dancing.chilly mee!
;)
Madonna is a great preformer and she has only improved with age. I think that it was her immaturity that made her famous because and great at first, because she did not like rules, she was rebellios and if you see old interviws of her, what she said was definitely childish immature and sometimes kind of childish. As she matured and got kids, got married and stayed that way for a while, found the kabbala, continued training of course, she brought wisdom into her life and into her musical creation and she is greater and more beautiful then ever. I agree that we age diffrently now, because youth is not longer restrected to young people. Out thoughts of young and old has changed, so have our habits and therefore even our body is affected. Evolution is maybe not entirely restrected to nature, but to our higher wants and needs. Maybe the survival of the fittest, is not only about the ability to find food and water but also includes higher ideals. Now youth and beauty is an ideal and even the skinny body of photomodels is now achieved by many normal women, even if there were discussions about it 15 years ago – people claimed it was impossible. So there is the idea of onness, that our emotions and thoughts are part of it.
I have noticed in your books that you are a feminist. In tarot, The Empress is the creative force and she is feminine, the Emperor is the wordly force, that restricts the creation and sets rules, and he represents the male force. To create, it means to imagine,to have dreams and fantasies and this is seen as an feminine preoccupation, but there this feminine quality resides in males. At the same time, the masculine force, that restricts creation and sets rules exist in males as well.
I meant in females as well! Sorry for the bad english, i think to much about what I want to say next.
BTW, that red hat poem is the new sign of getting old as it signals a total entre into a second childhood.
Yes, we age differently now because we celebrate the outrageous and narcissism is our Queen.
My mother and my aunts lied about their ages their entire lives. I swore I’d never do the same so don’t put me on the spot by asking my age. Suffice it to say I love it when people think I’m fifteen years younger.
I’m at the crux of having my cake and eating it, too. I’d never want to be a teen again, or even in my twenties. Have you ever asked yourself what you would have done different if you knew then what you know now?
I’m in that sublime age where I do know now and I’ve still got the body for bad and the will for it, too, and ooh la la can you see my red hat askew on my head?
I love her:)
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” – Mark Twain
Yes I completely agree… It’s just such accepted behavior to complain about getting old… Oh i’m old, oh my eyes are failing, oh my back hurts, oh my legs don’t work, oh i’m dying… lol…
‘God is in the word’ right? if one keeps telling themselves this, they are bound to experience just that!
Oddly enough, a young man, age about 27, one day said to me, that when he gets old, the illness that he will have is —- I can’t remember which he stated, but that is irrelevant. I was shocked, he was already planning and deciding what illness he’s going to have when he grows old. I found that utterly absurd, I told him, and he kind of agreed…
It’s all in the mind and attitude.
Definitely our view of aging is changing!
No me sorprende que Madonna, a sus 50 años este esplendida, ademas, convengamos, que la imagen vende mucho, y sobre todo en unha mujer, por lo tanto, debe cuidarse, y si es posible, tambien con cirugias, que de seguro las debe de tener.
It’s a very difficult question. I saw people at 80 years and very young, and people having 20 and already old.
Onde trabalho certas pessoas não me cumprimentavam porque “achava que fosse uma estagiária”. Muitas vezes dizem “ela parece uma menina mas tem jeito de mulher velha”. Tenho quase quarenta e penso que nem comecei a viver ainda, me sinto muito jovem. Mas não vou agir como uma criança porque simplesmente não sou mais criança. Vejo na atitude das pessoas muita inveja, e probresa de espírito, resolvi relaxar e não me importar mais com esse tipo de coisa. Melhor não ouvir o que o mundo fala e procurar ser você mesmo, um abraço.
From Women Who Run With the Wolves
Chapter: Joyous Body- Wild Flesh
Butterfly Woman – La Mariposa. On What Constitutes a healthy body in the instinctual world (pp. 221)
” I have been taken with the way wolves hit their bodies together when they run and play, the old wolves in their way, the young ones in theirs, the skinny ones, the fat ones,
the long-legged, the lop-tailed, the floppy-eared, the ones whose broken limbs healed crookedly. They all have their own body configurations and strengths, their own beauty,. They live and play
according to what and who and how they are. They do not try to be what they are not.
Also, in Ntozake Shange’s play … ” the woman in purple speaks after having struggled to deal with all the psychic and physical aspects of herself that the culture ignores or demeans. She sumes herself up in these
wise and peaceful words…
here is what I have …
poems,
big thighs
lil tits
&
so much love
her music always works with attractive young beauty and dance,so she’s still doing her job.if this job is there to let me believe that i should have this kind of fight against the time,i’m not sure that is a good fight for me?
Ah, Madonna! Oddly enough, she has always been a focal point in my life, always served as a point of reference in my perception of myself in terms of aging. It all began when I was 18, in high school, and was in a performance where a group of us were to dance to Madonna’s “Like a Virgin.” We we’re so young and so vibrantly alive! (I still remember the steps to that piece each time I hear the song–we must have rehearsed it a thousand times.) Since that time, Madonna has served as role model for me in terms of what I could potentially achieve at any given age. I look at Madonna in her latest show, with whatever her latest look, and I think: If she can look like that–that healthy and that strong–I have no excuse to give up on myself or throw in the towel just yet. I have no reason, likewise, to regard myself as “too old” to go after my as-yet-unattained aspirations. And yet, if I looked to my own family–my grandmother and my aunts, even my cousins, even those younger than myself–for their examples and opinions…? First of all, any woman over forty is nearer the grave than the cradle in their eyes. And above all, any woman over forty should “act her age.” Madonna and all of her achievements, in their opinion, are the epitome of impropriety. So, I try not to look to them to formulate my own sense of self-worth or potential. I look rather to that woman on the cover of the magazines in the grocery store check-out line–I look to role models like Madonna–and I think: “Yes! There is still time. Life is not over yet! It’s only just begun.” Is this a reasonable attitude? Is it realistic? I think it is, because I really believe that the only limits to human potential are the obstacles that exist within the mind of the individual. Ridding oneself of those mental blocks is 99% of the battle.
So, my conclusion: In terms of society’s general outlook on aging, I believe much has changed, even within my lifetime. A fifty-year old now is a “young person,” and someone of seventy can yet be regarded as a viable and contributing member of society. The notion of “retirement” is a thing of the past as more and more people are opting to use their latter years to fulfill their wildest dreams and aspirations. It used to be that only men were regarded as becoming more “handsome” and “distinguished”—altogether more attractive—with age. Now women too can bask in this new attitude that says “sophistication” and “maturity” are, likewise, elements of true beauty.
Dearest Paulo and friends,
I love this blog :)
Paulo just has to say a few words and this place is filled with life and virtues. Virtues of love and inspiration; and suddenly a this tiny bit of cyberspace which is barely significance in the vastness of the internet, is utterly layered with words of wisdom from both young and old, from every corner of the earth… All of which, are continuously learning from each others’ experiences. It is amazing how brave we feel to tell the truth here- whether it is our age or our opinion… we feel a sort of courage to be who ever we desire in that moment we write. I suppose it’s because we are somewhat comforted that our thoughts have not fallen on deaf ears, and the people who read our words, all share a common love and an aim: to be better than we already are, and of course, to love above all else.
A bit off the topic I know, but I couldn’t help myself. I just couldn’t help but smile at all the responses. I feel an incredible sense of amazement when I read how willing so many are, sharing themselves with the world through this blog :)
As for age: I think we are as old as we feel and think we are. Of course age comes with wisdom, but that doesn’t mean that a young person can not be as mature as an old one- it definitely depends on the individual. Besides the media’s influence that encourage the older, wise, sophisticated and beautiful look, the fact that the life expectancy has changed over the years from around 40’s and 50’s around your parents time, to now- with people living around 60’s and 70’s (depending on the area they are from) one would expect not seeing 50 or 40 year old ‘waiting to die’ anymore. Furthermore, the manner in which medical technology, and actually technology in general, is advancing, people are able to live longer, and feel more alive than they did 50 years ago. As for Madonna, I was never a fan but I have no problem with her if she’s happy the way she is. At the end of it all, we’re all going to get old one day, we’re all going to die, the most we can do is live with out regret, or else it will consume us in both life and possibly death.
Thank you for being.
Yajna
Como já dizia tio Salomão (um certo tio do meu pai, libanês de Marjaium, mas brasileiro de coração e morador de Catanduva, SP, que morreu lá pelos seus cento e poucos anos, porque quis, porque já estava quase sem amigos…) a idade das pessoas está na mente delas.
E eu cresci e vivi os meus 51 anos (ah, daqui há 3 dias faço 5.2)calcada nesta sabedoria e em tantas outras apreendidas do tio Salomão.
E saiba você, que com 5.1, gordinha e tudo mais, faço coisas que a moçadinha de 15 não faz. E me sinto ótima assim.
E ainda falando do tio Salomão (aquele jovem ancião de camisolona branca e grandes sandálias, que mais se parecia com um papai noel de férias)ensinou a meu pai, que passou pra mim, que a gente deve comer o que tem vontade e a hora que tem vontade, a hora que nosso corpo pede (aliás nosso corpo fala com a gente e nos pede tudo). Quando não temos vontade, até a água faz mal. E tem muito mais…e olha que entre nossas gerações (minha e a do tio Salomão) existe uma distância enorme, pois eu não o conheci pessoalmente, só pelas histórias e ensinamemtos me passadas pelo meu pai(que por incrível que pareça era quarenta e cinco anos mais velho que eu).
Por isso, não espanto ao ver a Madonna no auge dos cinquenta fazer o que faz. E eu também faço, porque não ?! Madonna e eu !
I learned to ride a Ripstik this summer and about a week ago had a young man (probably around ten or eleven) tell me that I ride mine almost better than he rides his. I asked – He’s had his for two years. And if you believe in chronological years – Madonna is actually younger than I am.
So stop counting.
Your poem submitted about aging resonated inside me. I LOVE being almost 50!!! It’s is the most freeing time of my life!! I think that aging HAS changed through the generations. This is quite possibly due to marketing schemes and our internalizing of the subliminal messages throughout. We internally want to be young and fresh and vibrant and attractive. Gone are the days of slow, stuffy, boring, coarse, aging individuals. Madonna epitomizes the results a person gains by FEELING, ACTING and BEING young!!! I will NEVER be seen putting a tissue in my sweater sleeve for safe keeping!
I like this song ‘Forever Young’ by Alphaville and hope you guys like it too…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7CuJ8cR9sg&feature=related
Lets dance in style, lets dance for a while
Heaven can wait were only watching the skies
Hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Are you going to drop the bomb or not?
Let us die young or let us live forever
We don’t have the power but we never say never
Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip
The musics for the sad men
Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders were getting in tune
The musics played by the madmen
Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever
Some are like water, some are like the heat
Some are a melody and some are the beat
Sooner or later they all will be gone
Why don’t they stay young
Its so hard to get old without a cause
I don’t want to perish like a fading horse
Youth is like diamonds in the sun
And diamonds are forever
So many adventures couldn’t happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams are swinging out of the blue
We let them come true
:O) i hope the link works…
When I was very young I met Jesse Owens in a restaurant. He was touring with the Harlem Globe Trotters in Europe. My uncle pointed him out and said “Go and ask for his autograph”. He hold my hand and off we went. Because we did not have anything to write on, Jesse Owens produced a dollar note out of his wallet and signed the autograph.
Last night, I dont know why, I dreamt about that, except that I was on the podium holding the dollar note with the biggest smile you could ever seen. It was like I was going for gold.
I have always been a bit of a rebel all my life for various reasons and somehow I could not help thinking about how Jesse Owens was a bit that way inclined too…..maybe he passed the torch onto me – just joking -
Well, anyhow we are here to talk about Madonna and us 50s + , I am older than you are Paulo and I feel like a Spring chicken. I have been told that my behaviour is like that of a six years old – humm …not quite… more like a 20 + and I like it that way.
Why? Because I am just a late bloomer, you see I am just discovering what life is all about. I am so naive in so many ways – for example – I did not know that you could have wrinkles in your hands, did you? That is a real novelty to me.
Everyday there is something new for me to learn in that area – I am in the process of learning a new language which was totally out of my range for so many years.That is what hibernation does to you I guess.
Let’s take another area : cooking. Well, well, well, it is an art in itself. Being in the early stages, I can only manage a few recipes. The potential is overwhelming though….I tasted an omelette in a restaurant a few months ago. I labelled it “the alchemist omelette”. It was made with “Roquefort”. so tasty and it requires so few ingredients…
The Universe does not ask how old you are, it is only a man made thing, you can learn and grow at any age. I am proof of that.SO..
To all the grandpas and grandmas on this earth, let’s get out of the rocking chair and like this site,”Let’s rock with our Baby Madonna”. …come to think of it, I need a few lessons from her too….
Must dash, my nails are in need of some “attention”….ooh la la
Coco rico/ca
I simply love the poem. I’m 42, but I’ve been living the life in purple for as long as I can remember. Maybe when I get older, I’ll start making my bed, opening bills, saving receipts, balancing check-books, eating at a set time at a set table, combing my hair, ironing my clothes, dressing in matching outfits and working in a “real” job.
But most likely, when I get to that age, I’ll have forgotten all those crazy ideas. Because they were never mine to begin with.
Acabei de ler O Vencedor está só.
E este em minha opinião foi o seu melhor livro lançado até hoje, claro que outros tiveram um forte caráter espiritual – como o alquimista, que oi um dos melhores livros que já li nestes meus 14 anos de vida – mas o vencedor está só tem personagens muito carismáticos, você lê este livro torcendo pela Gabriela, sempre que o Igor chegava perto dos outros personagens eu gelava.
E o Igor foi um personagem muito bem trabalhado, aliás não somente ele, todos foram, Ewa, HH, todos muito bem feitos, estava fabuloso.
Quando eu cheguei na última página fiquei com tanto receio de ler, mas valeu a pena, mesmo não sendo exatamente o que eu queria – coitada da Gabriela – mas foi sua melhor obra.
Parabéns Paulo.
In this time you have to look young to be liked and loved. Our parents did’nt have that problem, eventhough they were mostly liked and loved, thank God ,Creator of life and time.
Marika
I’ve just stumbled on this blog following a chain of circumstances and found the Jenny Joseph poem. I am a TEFL teacher, or rather, that’s what I do, and I’ve used this poem with foreign students to elicit responses to age and ageing in their cultures. I’ve found that simply put, most Mediterranean students have a better attitude to age and the aged than English kids of the same age. I’ve no idea why, beyond that in England the emphasis is heavily on youth and young beauty to the extent that it excludes all else. At 42, I find this appalling.
I can’t imagine any of my comments here are likely to be read with much interest but it’s better to speak than be forever silent, maybe….
A dear friend of mine is turning 80 this October. He is a well known and respected poet and visual artist who is still producing new and startling work. I can’t believe he is going to be 80. Because of him, I have kept my ears open to other artists who are still very active and 80 plus. There are lots of them. I don’t remember this being the case a generation ago. My friend doesn’t look young, but his mind is wide open for every new idea he can tap. I believe that this is his secret, along with a silly sense of humor.
why this OBSESSION WITH STAYING YOUNG.
HE WHO HAS GIVEN US BIRTH, KNOWS WHAT IS BEST FOR US.
life expectancy has increased, yes ! thaanks to better scitific advancements and removal of poverty to some extent.
BUT WHY DO WE WANT TO RMAIN FORVER YOUNG, TRICK IS TO REMAAIN TRUE TO EACH AGE. AS ELISABETH SAYS, MORE THAN THE BODY WE ARE THE MIND AND THEN AGAIN a beautiful soul, ageless, timeless.
i am not old ( i am 36 M ) have never felt any limitations of mind or body ( for my endeavours ) age is an issue if u make an issue out of it. the grace, the beauty, the majesty, the …. divinity i have seen in some men ( and women ) whose hairs were all white, made me fearless towards age.
paulo ! while the spirit behind staying young of Madonna is good, but why this obsession with looking young, looking young and staying young are not same, in fact someone who is obssed with looking young is alreday mentanlly old !!
love
aditya
In my elementary years, I used to think that 25 is already too old to get married. I’m nearing 20 now and I still couldn’t see myself settling down in the near future. The 25 bar line disappeared completely.
I look at my mother now who’s in her early 40s and it’s like looking at myself in front of the mirror, maybe only skinnier.
I guess what I’m trying to get at is… age doesn’t matter. Age is a mindset. If you think you’re too old to do what you want, then maybe you are. But if you think that age has no limiting effect on you, then that’s who you are. It will show in what you do, how you look and how you live your life. Just like Madonna.
i think it’s a good thing to try to show the best of ourselves to the others,a kind of respect,that doesn’t mean to wear a mask of a uniform beauty.and also it’s a good thing to show to young people,that when we’re getting old,and our picture is changing,in fact our mind can become more beautiful that our face,our body.
Todas as idades são importantes e todas tem seus limites, como também todas tem seus brilhos. O importante é que respeitemos o espaço de todas as idades e coloquemos nossas atividades mais plenas em amor.
beijos,
Mari Raphael.
Dear Paulo,
It is simple…whatever is in the heart will reflect outside,it has alway been this way and will always be this way.
Age is nothing!
Love,
Eva
About 25 years ago, a 90 year ‘young’ woman shared her secret with me. She said “Pick a number you like and stay that number for the rest of your life.Your body will get older but you won’t…
ecause you are not your body
I chose ‘31′…and now every birthday means a another candle, more gifts and another reason to party. Does it work? In Jan. my body will be 71…but I’ll still be 31 and having a great time learning new things and meeting new and exciting people who have shared some ot their thoughts with me. Thank you, Paulo for the insights you share.
John
Well now… The most wonderful example I can think of in terms of aging is Maya Angelou… Phenomenal Woman…
Phenomenal Woman
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
‘Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
I would say you are old when you realize how much or how little you are about to lose. There are not better truths and tellers of truth as our children. As much as giving up perfection you enter a different world which could be as well called living within the limits. This is why some people never get old.
How wonderful to read all this, and Luce I know what you mean, I left my husband 2,5 years ago and I feel so young again, I feel I can breath again. I am younger now then I was 10 years ago. I found myself again, and thank God I did what I did as I had very nearly lost myself in the deepest dungeons of depression. I can laugh again, I can sing again, I can dance again and most importantly I can love again.
why nobody wonders the same about mick jagger , is it because he’s a man?
Hi.
Both my parents died in their 47th year and now as I appraoch 50 I realise how very young they where.
We should not be suprised by age but celebrate it because it brings wisdom and experience to be shared.
Where in Great Britain my heritage is still deeply affecting my own generations sense of individualism, personal freedoms and growth; because of the World Wars which brought great group responsibility and accountability – Ghana too also has issues of conflict where youth and elders contest the future. Hence, my work organisation there tries to create a path for dialogue; a discourse of intergenerational learning which respects both the traditional and future generations: one where both group identities are empowered and interconnected, rather than underminded. Without this, I feel respect, trust et al will continue to be eroded away as currently is the threat. Our culture is lulled by the thrill of the “winner takes all”.
The title of an authors book, YOU ARE, THEREFORE I AM, is i feel, intrinsic to the discourse of life. I am not sure that some ways of expression are sustainable, responsible sychrondestiny,
In the long term, like the grains of sand that pass through the hourglass.. there is but one finality even if the pattern of how each grain travels is different with each revolving.
Overall, i have great faith in “nature’s wisdom” and how each generation is to pass through the hourglass of infinite time.
taking lead from how other cultures view the growing process…. where for some being ‘big’ shows good appetite and good health, yet in another culture being ‘thin’ is culturally praised.
An elderly bald man in a burgundy metallic convertible car, I was behind on the free way yesterday, had this license plate; ‘BE21 4EVER’ He had the top down, of course.
More optimistic than Cheer’s; ‘If I could turn back time’, but may be not realistic.
Here here Sonja, your comments make me want to go singing in the street.
Thanks to you lady.
Hx
Dear Mirela Baron,
I agree with you, and that is reason if I shuld choose between Madona, Cher or Tina Turner I will always choose Tina.
Luce
Age…i think some people let go of the child in their souls way too easily! We forget, as adults, that life is a gift and we are here to have fun and dance as much a possible! I still hear allot of my friends saying: Im in my 30’s and i should have done this or that by now cause im almost 40…chasing after the ideals society make us believe we need in order to live a good life…I say..whatever…play play play as long and as often as you can…We have this beautiful planet that was given to us and we hardly stop to enjoy it..The child in us all should be kept alive until the day we die.Life should never be taken too seriously! PLAY.. i say not matter what your age!
I think of the way women i know looked in the late 90s early 00s..they looked so much older than their age. but i guess that a decade ago that was the style. i just think that since, style has taken a big hold of the world and its IN to look young. my mother looked like she was in her late 30s early 40s 10 years ago, now she looks like shes in her late early 40s. so as she has gotten older she has started to look younger, same as with lots of women i see or know. its a mentality thing. everyone is living in a faster lane nowadays and were all trying to keep up. i thihnk that now there is so much more knowledge and so many more things to do and so many new ‘diseases’ and health issues..people are just trying to stay on top of all the madness going on in the world today and that keeps them on thier feet..keeping them young?! i dont know. Paulo, you make me think more than any other person ive ever known or met. youve changed my life in a way i never thought a stranger could..
Age is a mindset. You can choose to take on-board conditioning about what is or insn’t possible, or you can define what it means to life your life to the fullest at any age. You see ‘older’ people mountain climbing and doing things with high-levels of energy that younger people are not even doing. People are told the physical body will wear out at a certain time. You choose to beleive it or have your body tell you what is its own reality.
Hi Paulo! Intersting question! Specialy for me who worck and believe since 15 years in beautytreatments.Who struggle to convince the people in my beautystudio that the art how they live ,think and take care of theyr body and theyr spirit,mind this art of acting is responsable for thyer age fisically and mental.Yes is impotant to exercise discipline with the voice,dance or to be carefully with our face or mind so long we don`t confuse this acting with narcismus.Yes I love madonas voice but whenn i see her face today I don`t recognise her trully aura.I cann not find the beautyfull spirit that she was in the 80-s.She get old but she stil do like a teenager witch has for me no autenticity.I love autentical old people who never lost their youth that you can see in their eyes.It meens you was in Vienna so near to my home!it warms my heart! I hope you enjoyed the concert! love mirela
Paulo,
I don’t believe it is just about perception but about our attitude towards aging. People today people care more about themselves and science has helped us stay younger and live longer. I personally feel much younger that I am and I have more energy, dreams and desires than I did when I was in my twenties, I believe that keeps me young. I also believe that we ultimately reflect what dwells within and if you feel old that is what how we would look in the outside. I intend to continue doing all the things I love to do, including dancing, until my body tells me that it can’t but I will care for it in such a way that I can prolong those activities as long as I can.
Ok it’s true, when I had the age of my sons 28th and 23th, a mother of 55th was really old and of course she didn’t make was I am doing …to make sports, to dance, to dress jeans and tennis shoes, to study, to read and never stop to learn.
Ok I always made sport and I think this is one difference, but not only. I surely received one input from my boyfriend, I was 22th years old and he looked at an ” old woman ” with interest, I was nervous for this and he said to me…” Have you eyes to see how much nice she is ? she is 40th years old !!!! I want to see you at that age !”
I said nothing to him but I said to me , ok you’ll be as now even getting older and I really believed that I could and I wanted to get old and older keeping young and all the rest has been a natural consequence..keeping alive the child inside of me and the same time being a woman, a mother and why not in the future also a grandmother.
Years ago, the society asked to a Man and a Woman to be “old” to cover their roles, may be in this is the real difference ?
I am 53.
I was up to the age of 36 a stock broker.
I got retired then because of an illness.
I always kept a journal since I was 12.
I believed the illness was a miracle.
I have a book waiting for an answer from a publisher.
I have 10 more to type up and send out.
@ 53 I believe I will be a published writer.
I already know I am a writer.
So what’s age got to do with anything?
I am grateful to be able to express myself here.
Kindest,
Michael
We discovered seriousness is not testimony of maturity. Maybe why now we encounter younger old persons.
I just smily imagine the old woman “run with my stick along public railings, and make up for the sobriety of my youth.” oh yes too funny.
Still we’re humans, under stimuli, and have tendancy to go where the number gets higher. Madonna old/young and the abyss…the choice is ready-made. Must be a sensor somewhere. :)
Thank you.
i thought i should also share a poem, by Alfred Lord Tennyson..
By an Evolutionist
The Lord let the house of a brute to the soul of a man,
And the man said, ‘Am I your debtor?’
And the Lord-‘Not yet; but make it as clean as you can,
And then I will let you a better.’
I.
If my body come from brutes, my soul uncertain or a fable,
Why not bask amid the senses while the sun of morning shines,
I, the finer brute rejoicing in my hounds, and in my stable,
Youth and health, and birth and wealth, and choice of women and of wines?
II.
What hast thou done for me, grim Old Age, save breaking my bones on the rack?
Would I had past in the morning that looks so bright from afar!
OLD AGE
Done for thee? starved the wild beast that was linkt with thee eighty years back.
Less weight now for the ladder-of-heaven that hangs on a star.
I.
If my body come from brutes, tho’ somewhat finer than their own,
I am heir, and this my kingdom. Shall the royal voice be mute?
No, but if the rebel subject seek to drag me from the throne,
Hold the sceptre, Human Soul, and rule thy province of the brute.
II.
I have climb’d to the snows of Age, and I gaze at a field in the Past.
Where I sank with the body at times in the sloughs of a low desire,
But I hear no yelp of the beast, and the Man is quiet at last,
As he stands on the heights of his life with a glimpse of a height that is higher.
Love and Graditude
Annie
Dear Anlao,
You are 28 and rich as 35 years old but do not ever think yourself as old.
When I was 31 I decided to build small house on my own and never get married. I built house and wish I never got married !
I lived 15 years of hell which I could had avoid if I followed my insticts. Now I am free person again. Free to love, free to live, free to be old if I decide to be !
Still I am happy young person who will soon be 57, most of best things to me have happened after my 55th birthday !
What to tell you more, just wish you lots of joy, love and happiness because in that way time goes backward and all at once you find that young heart within you is leading your steps, feelings and acts.
With love
Luce
This poem is really funny :-)
Purple is one of my favorite colurs too ;-)
So I´m already wear purple *LOL*
My parents are in their mid 50’s and have always looked and acted much older than their age. They’re always tired, working their two jobs, trying to get properties in two countries and buying endless stuff. They come home from work and go to sleep, watch “the wheel of fortune” and than go to sleep again to wake up even more tired. My dad sacrificed his entire life working for the family and now that he has to work when retired keeps screaming that he should be doing nothing right now. Whenever I tell him he doesn’t need two properties he gets upset and yells even more, because he doesn’t have what he had. His mother did nothing from the moment she retired but wait for her children to visit her, so my dad was visiting her place 3-4 times a week, otherwise she would complaign. Now he is 55, and if I forget to visit them in one week they make me feel like a bad daughter. I am also bad for not managing to get married by now, and not having grandchildren for them. On top of that, i am ungrateful and selfish, because i spend my time taking milonga lessons, rollerblading, and i like to travel alone or with strangers, and visit ungodly weird places instead of going with them.
I’m 28, and look 35. I’ve always been older than my age, looked older. By 16, because I was taking care of my brother nine years younger, people would think I’m his mother and call me lady. I’ve never been called miss, for example. The good side of that is that you can’t miss what you didn’t have. In the last years, I’ve started exercising, doing the activities I wanted (I bought my first bike at 27, and it took me two days of bruising to learn how to bike. My family laughed at me and called me ridiculous, but I’ve never been happier). Doing the things I loved made me feel better, and as a consequence, look better, look younger.
I think the way we view the purpose of our older age is changing, correlated to how we age mentally (and physically). When people give up the purpose of their life, that which makes them happy, in exchange of listening to what others tell them life should be, they end up working because they have to, staying with their family because they have to, and do nothing when retired because they feel they have to. And your dreams and hopes are somewhere inside of you, tired as well of not mattering at all.
I tought project management at night for adult education for about two years. People would come after their jobs, in hope to add another certificate to their resume and get a better paying job. Tired bodies, tired minds, and also tired hopes. I had two ladies about to retire, that were interested in learning all about it to map their next career, the one they gave up when they were young. They were nervous, excited, absorbing everything in the class and just sparkling with enthousiasm. The best students I ever had, aged 62 and 57, I was blessed to take from the more than i gave.
I also recommend the documentary “Young at heart”, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1047007/. It really is all in the attitude.
I coloured my hair pink the other day, for an event i was attending. Whilst I was sitting waiting for the colour to take, i broke into fits of laughter, saying to my partner…..’I am too old to be colouring my hair pink arn’t I’. I am 35 and I have done lots of’crazy’ things in my years. But calling my self too old at 35 is one of the crazyist.
Who decides I am too old……NOT ME. I am pleased to say that the colour has not washed out yet and I love having bright pink hair.
I am godess, hear me ROAR.
Love and light
Hx
Bonjour Paulo,
Drôle de coïncidence, je discutais justement hier avec un collègue de ce sujet. Nous nous posions la question devant le retjet dês vieux et d’être vieux: Comment faire comprendre aux gens que les prochains vieux seraient eux-mêmes?
Tavaillant tous les jours avec des personnes âgées, j’écoute leur paroles et celles des soignants. La plupart des personnes que je suis acceptent mal le viellissement et ressassent sans cesse le passé! Mais ce qu’il y a de plus difficile à accepter, c’est l’idée de la déchéance, la maladie, la démence et biensûr de la mort. Beaucoup de personnes me disent que dans les maisons de retraite (où ces personnes vivent) il n’y a que des vieux! Elles ne veulent pas être comparées aux autres et se mélanger avec les autres. C’est chacun pour soi!
Les soignants confrontés à ces personnes, essayent de se détacher le plus possible et ont peur de devenir comme “eux”. Oui, le vieillissement inéluctable fait peur! Nous devons nous y préparer avec sagesse et profiter de chaque jour que nous viellissons…
A bientôt, Steffi
paolo special one…
the lyrics of EWF (that’s the way of the world), can tell you the secret of growing old…
Hearts of fire creates love desire
Take you high and higher to the world you belong
Hearts of fire creates love desire
High and higher to your place on the throne
We’ve come together on this special day
To sing our message loud and clear
Looking back we’ve touched on sorrowful days
Future pass, they disappear
You will find peace of mind
If you look way down in your heart and soul
Don’t hesitate ‘cause the world seems cold
Stay young at heart ‘cause you’re never (never, never, ..) old at heart
That’s the way of the world
Plant your flower and you grow a pearl
A child is born with a heart of gold
The way of the world makes his heart grow cold
earth wind & fire
love, anita
Thank you Paulo for the poem…
But i have to say, I hate purple… :)
Love and Graditude
Annie
There is a difference between the old and healthy and the very old and frail. These frail elderly people seem to be treated very badly in our society, they become unseen and unheard almost taboo. When we are young there is a tenancy to think we will live forever and always be able to run down the hill and always have time and energy for the next thing. But life is short which is why we have to live as fully as we can whatever age we are. Also to remember very elderly and infirm people are people.
Hello Paulo, thanks for the subject. My name is Frida, I’m 45. I think in our time people are more ‘alowed’ to age in their own way. Apart from genetic differences, it probably has to do with having a goal in life, enjoying being alive. My father of 77, not only looks at least ten years younger, he is also full of plans and ideas, and feels he stil needs another 30 years (he’s not even joking). In earlier times he wouldn’t be able to express this in the same way. But on the other hand, there’s enough people in our time who act old when still young. Yes, there are more possibilities, but I’m not sure everyone is capable of taking them. Do we age differently? Some do, some don’t……
Dear Paulo,
Madonna is for me the greatest showwoman of ever. And she is the great mytho of my life. I love her songs from the 1985, and I have all her LPs until Who’s that girl.
I remember when she did 40 years, and I was 25.
I hope that her strongness and willingness will continue forever because the mythos (like you) are immortal…
I’m instead very sad for Michael Jackson, some age of Madonna but a great decline…no more music, no more songs, no more performance. Only the sad history of his skin decadence, and his unbelievable pedophily….
It’s normal that you dance when Madonna is singing.
She represents the need of an ethernal youngness…
She plays the music and the soundtrack of our life…
And she is the living symbol of the dream of every girl to be great over 40s and 50s….
I’m 35 now…no more good for easy songs…love great performance…and Madonna is that…
Only a great complaint: in my life I could never assist at a Madonna Live performance….
Hope to see soon…
Ettore
I love that poem. I have to admit I’m not particularly good at doing what society expects, never have been. My mother is 74, wears jeans and jean jackets. My grandmother wore colour straight after her husband died which way back when was against tradition. My other mother rolled down hills with the kids at the park lol
So my role models are very young at heart ladies who snub their noses at what’s expected of them and do what they like.
Kathleen xxoo
Dear, dear Paulo,
THANK YOU FOR THE POEM !!!!
I know you sent it to all of us who want it, but somehow I feel as if it were meant just for me.
The first of October is my birthday and this poem is describing me and makes me feel lightheaded, full of joy, easyness and love.
I shall read it when I gather with friends and see their smiling faces as it is hilariously ME !
With love,
Luce
Hi Paulo,i can speak only for myself.I was a wild child,unable to imagine at all,how it could be getting old.I am 50 now and in many aspects i feel like starting.My art and personality only now seem to gain some weight-and awareness und understanding become more profound.I always want to believe in a good outcome,focusing on the ones who complete there great works at an advanced age.Sir Peter Ustinov is one of my lead-figures;wisdom,compassion and great humor combined.Now;advanced technology and the city-life had an impact on the superficial perception of age.In the country-side it seems to change little,but in many areas,times are not as hard as for example a hundred years ago.Better medical care and all animities may have an impact. Apart from all this i believe,that a certain rare especies has been around for a long while.I`m talking about the ones who manage to stay in life -and also young in there minds.Madonna is an extreme example.Thats discipline at the highest level as a basis,its hard body-work and focusing-strength.On top of that she knows to let go-and trust in intuition.All this in different degrees,seems possible to many of us.Its an individual evolution,each one of us has to work on staying young in its many aspects.Nietsche;Maturity means to regain the seriousness,with which we played as children. I don`t think it all has changed that much,only the possibilities to fake it.Can`t get them older young ones down,its good to have them around.Salud,Will.
Age refers to the fact that we can perceive time and the changes that happen within a certain time.
To see age in a bigger circle it is merely that something is born or evolves, runs through a process of changes or evolution and then dies respectively disintegrates into the particles where everything originally came from.
Age in itself only prescribes a certain moment in a certain process.
Youth to me means being full of inspiration, interest and action where as old age signifies stagnation and passivity.
We can be old at the age of 16 sitting in front of TV being bored, if not entertained and young at the age of 100 enthusiastically preparing a meal for our friends, finding a new way to paint a picture or writing a concept about ‘how to use synergies to achieve more independence from doctrines’…
People in former times didn’t have the possibilities of today and thus the majority followed a well known pattern of childhood, adult working life and retired old age.
People today have more possibilities to stay young for a prolonged time: There is knowledge how to eat and live healthy and medicine helps our physical body to keep functioning.
For the mind to stay young there is so much inspiration around through global mobility and network, but it is up to each individual to grab the chances.
Madonna certainly is one of them!
Well, what can I say about aging? This is a difficult one, as I am “young” and some might find inappropriate me to discuss this theme.
But anyway, I believe being old hasn`t so much to do with your age (50, or 60 years old).
Therefore, I think that it depends on how do you feel inside your soul, how happy you feel, how much energy do you have etc.? Because if you think that you have got something left to say or to do, maybe some of your dreams hasn`t yet become truth, your age depends on how much energy you can put in achieving them, how ready are you to fight for them? Has society put so much pressure on you that you feel you don`t deserve them, or that your time is long gone? If it is so you should release yourself from those thoughts, because you must always do your best to fulfill your life, your soul with happyness, pleasure. You`ll achieve this by fighting for your cause, creating whenever there is a creative force inside of you, sharing your love with the people closest to you. That`s how you`ll feel young even when you are 50 years old!
The opposite would be someone 23 years old, without awareness of what he wants from life, and even when he sees a glimpse of his Personal Legend, of his dream, he`s already disillusionised, because he recognizes it as immpossible! From that moment on, he begins to age rapidly, because his heart is filling with bitterness each moment he remembers his dream conciously or unconciously, until one day when he will find himself in remorse for not doing anything to achieve it!
You are old when you have no longer creativity, dreams and energy to make them them become true!
my soul feels century old
my heart feels as I am
on paper I am 47 going 48 this november
we are on linear time
we are visual beings
beauty is everywhere
supple skin of a baby’s butt
creases on an aged face
enjoy the view!
“and make up for the sobriety of my youth” I can especially relate to this! The person who wrote this was quite definitely English… ;)
Dear Paulo, thank you for the update and this wonderful poem… I’m sure many could write down such wishes… if only they were to be honest with themselves?
Of course the moral is to never lose touch with the child in us…
Thank you for sharing this marvelous text with us, Love, Paul
Thank you, my Paulo Coelho, a beautiful poem. I wonder…how to ..make up for the sobriety of my youth!! And for you, all young friends here, ‘may be I ought to practice a little now??’ says the poem.
To have a conventional life is very boring. Thanks to my …intuition and imagination and to my love for life I was never bored.
My dear Paul from Austria, thank you for writing to me ‘the happy birthday’ in Greek and German [the language of my ancestors and the language of my 'lost dream'!!] I love you too, my friend.
LOVE,
THELMA
I love the poem,so much fun.I have to add that I admire Madonna ,because I know she work hard for having so great success.Who cares she might done some plastic ? Her feet are not plastic,nor her voice.I think she is a winner due to her strong personality,I see her as an example.Maybe she have done also few mistakes,but we already know that”nobody is perfect”.
I have never grown mentally after 17 or 18 years of my physical age…and now virtual life gives one the chance to be the age one wants to be …so what is it about age unless you are in a job that needs you to be physically fit to prescribed standards…
I am fat and in my forties but so far none of my onlilne friends have known that till I mention my college-going son…and I love that…hurrah!
Everyone (at least in America) has been saying that 40 is the new 30 and 30 is the new 20. However, as I approach 30, I realize that this only refers to one’s state of mind and not necessarily how a person is physically.
I’m sure Madonna has to work twice as hard as she did when she was half her age to maintain a fit body. I’m not saying this to discourage people–I think it’s great that Madonna is in great shape at her age, because if a man did it no one would question it, but if a woman does it she has the ‘gall’ to do it. However, age is supposed to catch up with us sometimes.
I am glad I am not the only one that thinks on this. I am approaching 30 and by the time I hit 30 I would like to have a Masters degree and be ready for children…but we can only guide life so much. I have already accepted my Personal Legend careerwise, and consider myself very lucky. This helps me accept the age process, rather than fight it. Also, having a life partner that is going through the same aging process at the same time is very helpful, because he understands my feelings on the subject.
Thanks, Paulo–great topic as always.
we have very long life expectancy now. so i think it is ok to become a pianist at age 30 then become an architect at age 50 as long as you are happy doing so. i do not know about society. i truly hope it would support those happy people instead of restricting them. those people create something inspiring for all of us, which bring more inspiring people. love
I think that there is a very big difference between getting older and getting old. Let me explicate.
To get older is a natural process as is the cycle of life,from birth to the death of the human body. We get older chronologically but age as we have heard numerous times, is merely a number. For a 22 year old a 40 year old man may be “old” but for a 75 year old man he is a young man.
We live in a very youth-obsessed world as well where image is placed on a pedestal. The media has played a very significant role in basically stopping the clock of aging. With a surge of cosmetic surgery and various elixers we may look younger but still be “old” internally. Have you ever met someone much older than yourself but felt like you were talking to a child,or vice versa?
The mind is a very powerful instrument that can influence how we age physically and psychologically.
Madonna is an inspiration as are those individuals who choose to throw out the numbers and let their souls and drive guide them through life, not their age.
People have searched for the fountain of youth and will continue to do so, but perhaps we can start by examining ourselves to see whether or not part of the answer lies somewhere within.
Blessings,
~Jaklina~
Uma vez, em pleno carnaval de salvador, me sentei em uma pequena ilhota, o famoso morro do cristo, e decidi que não iria mais dormir. Obvio que não falava a sério, mas me tinha dado conta o quanto estava desperdiçando com a preguiça. O interessante foi que esse pensamento foi me acelerando até um certo ponto onde perdi a medida e tive então que repensar completamente a minha vida. Foi o momento de parar, andar mais devagar e saber deixar para amanhã. É interessante pensar sobre isso. Qual a medida do hoje e qual a do amanhã? Vale a pergunta…
Ah, once again … synchronicity!
:D
I have just returned from a new venture, and was just thinking about how very many new adventures are constantly part of my everyday life and thinking. I was thinking about the many things I do, the varieties and differences of all of them, and was thinking about my willingness to always add more. And I will be 50 soon.
Yes, I am different than my parents’ generation … to generalize. but my parents are the very reason that I am different. I saw them and their lives … I saw what they wanted me to be … I saw what they had given up … I saw that they had lost their dream and they had hoped, for a time, to live out their lost dreams in me … and then, in old age, I saw them question their lives.
My parents generation did what they thought they were supposed to do. They made choices, and their choices created responsibilities that left them with those choices for quite some time: family, career, etc.
They “gave up” their “lives” to raise a family (or so they used to remind us if for some reason we sounded the least bit ungrateful for something) and in doing so, they “gave up so much” so that we could have a better life.
To me, I’ve always felt guilty about that … I would much rather they they had truly lived, and maybe not “given up so much.”
Seeing them, I decided to LIVE my life … every day … any way the wind blows. I am going to be 50 in a few months and I have never had a nine-to-five job. Just that alone confused the heck of my parents … they couldn’t imagine it! WHAT?! NOT working 9-5 every day with weekends off?!
I don’t think my parents ever understood me … they couldn’t imagine recreating oneself, or living for the next dream, or to check the next “thing” off the list.
“What are you up to lately Donna?”
“Just trying to get to see the Aurora Borealis!” (would be something I would say … )
“What did you do today?”
“Ah … well, the big things were: Latin class; picked up some priceless Maya artifacts to photograph for an archaeological publication; saved my brother a $1000; and tutored a 19-year-old in Physical and Cultural Anthropology … ”
“I didn’t know you were a tutor!”
“I’m not, today was the first day!” I say.
There is a quote on my MySpace page:
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting … Holy SH!T! What a ride!”
I’m grateful for my parents because they taught me how to live …
Mz. Madonna and I share the same birthday and I too am still a kid at heart. My mind and body does not care how many years I have inhabited this physical vessel. I embrace the present moment with gratefulness and wonder.
Tengo una tía abuela de 80 años y baila cualquier música desde boleros hasta lo mas moderno, hace chistes y usa Internet, entre otras cosas, mi abuelo de 78 es súper saludable porque en su juventud siempre fue sano y además disfrutaba con buen humor y era muy trabajador. Para mi la edad depende mas del estado de animo de las personas y como quieran llevar su vida, la senectud llega con el sedentarismo y el mal humor, cuando creemos que somos muy viejos para cambiar o para correr riesgos. No es solo la edad física es mas la edad mental lo que nos envejece. Al adaptarnos a lo moderno y no dejar de querer aprender nunca y mantenernos activos (es un mundo tan grande que quedarnos por siempre en un solo sitio sería un desperdicio de espacio) seremos mas jóvenes que el promedio.
O incrível, não é somente Madonna dançando como adolescente aos 50 anos, temos também Mick Jagger aos 65 anos, se requebrando como na época do lançamento de “Satisfaction”. No YouTube, tem um video de 2008 do Paul McCartney (66 anos), catando Hey Jude, com uma incrível energia juvenil.
Creio que as diferenças entre as gerações, é cada vez menor, tanto fisicamente como mentalmente. Fisicamente, a ciência dispõem de vários recursos para retardar o envelhecimento, e mentalmente os(as) veteranos(as), mantém um interesse de acompanhar todas as novidades, e ao mesmo tempo, as novas gerações tem uma admiração pelo estilo de vida de gerações passadas; com isto criando um certo nivelamento entre as gerações.
Ah! Madonna, além gostar de dançar e cantar, também gosta de ler os livros de Paulo Coelho!
well i think you did the point, when i see Madonna doing something at her age she shouldnt do… i see the contrary of a lot of people, i see hope, hope to really see that get old does not mean that all the fun of the youth is over, so many people just look at Madonna and thinks that she does not want to get old, and i think and see that she does not want to FEEL old, what it really love on her is that since day one she is always trying things… some times is something you like, sometimes is something you dont like but she never stop, she stills having hungry to learn and try, so many other people just stop at some point of his life and just let her life go… so many of us with all the money she has will be just doing nothing, do you really think she needs any more money? why then she keeps going on? because she wants to top herself and be better everytime thats the way we all should live… try to make us self better, why to stop having fun? because whe are that old? your age is on your mint, and Madonna looks younger not because the liftings, you look at her doing her tour and you can see her having fun and feeling like a young girl, Madonna means look always for the next best thing, in her eyes the best is always on the future, she looks at all what she did just for a second… because she thinks the best will be on the horizont….
Não vejo nenhum problema em ficar velho, hoje em dia as pessoas tem mais medo de ficarem velhas, talvez por causa de nossa cultura moderna de consumo, ninguém quer ficar velho e ser internado num asilo. Admiro muito as culturas tribais, onde os velhos tem um status muito importante, são eles que mantem as tradições, são os guardiões do conhecimento. A percepção é negativa porque ninguém quer ser descartado da sociedade, por isso que existe um mercado da “fonte da juventude”. Acho que devemos envelhecer como somos, como a vida nos forja.
bo0om paulo,
the first true revelation for me was sound,
the next was time…
only when we transcend time ( ageing etc, ),
can we begin to perceive other parallel universes,
why should we cram up of lives with a whole load of bullshit,
when we could be doing it over lifetimes at our own pace,
this is the culprit which leads us to do more meaningless stuff that are simply irrelavent,
I am sure most of you who have tried l_s_d know that the time barrier is so easy to transcend,
LovE A_lways
bo0om
Looking at myself a 43 year old with two teenage kids who think I am old, and looking at my parents in their sixties nearly seventies, I see that my parents still have that inner child in them as all people do but are too scared to show it, because of the rules they grew up with. I remember a friend of 50 telling me she better start dressing differently as she is now is 50, and that is when I thought why. I live in an area full of artists and see the most wonderful people, some old but dressing like young women and man, and why not, if it makes them feel happy, it is their way of showing their young souls, how wonderful I think when I see them, it shows they have courage which many people don’t have. I feel though any question in life comes down to be true to ones feelings and ones inner child or feeling, what ever we call it if we really follow our inner-voice we will do the right thing in the end, shame though that the people that need to get in touch with their inner feelings and their heart are not here, like my ex, because they need it more then we do, who are out here, we know our feelings and mainly agree on things, but it is those who don’t get it, and are stuck in the keeping up appearances that need to learn that what they feel is OK and that they will be still be loved if they make mistakes. Because I feel that is what all the fear is about, it is about being scare not being loved no matter what you do.
I don’t know.. I just lost a very good job vacancy because I’m “too young”, according to the HR office. They said that my CV was fantastic and that they couldn’t believe that someone on my age had all that knowledge and studies. Should I sit down and wait till I get old, then?
World sometimes is not fair with young people. If you don’t look for anything and just focus on having fun, people say you are lazy. If you look for interesting things, to improve your skills and to become someone different, they look at you with a question mark.
Let Madonna be whatever she wants… She got everything she worked for! And if she can be 50 dancing and jumping, whay wouldn’t she?
Camilla
(24-year-old Brazilian living in London)
I think inside of all of us we always have our inner child, our soul that feels no age, no matter what age we are. Some people can show it some hide it, but to connect this to your question about if their is a change in the world or if we are still stuck in fear, I think looking at people slowly showing their inner child more, like madonna, never mind the reason why, is showing that their is a change happening, I think we are more free then our parents were, they felt young inside but were so drilled into thinking you don’t show that so they carried it inside themselves, but so deep that no one could see it. I am struggling to get what I am trying to say into words, hope you get what I am trying to say.
And thanks Maria, big hug back
Good evening
I think we shouold consider that the life is getting longer too, let’s not gorget that Madonna is a person who has got as a scopo a reason to live to maintain her looks as it is part of her career
I believe end of the day that age depends also on the person’s own self esteem, of how much you believe in yourselfm if you think that past 40 trs old there is not a life, then your body will follow your thoughts, human mind is a very powerful thing
cheers
Aging: I am 36 years old, my daughter is 21/2 years old. The age difference between my mum and me is 20 years. I look at them now I think they have aged in skin, but their lifestyles are yet more active than my in laws. Whereas my in laws really live their age day to day. More and more even in Asia the perception of age is changing. It is becoming a moment where people do things because they want to do it not because it is appropriate for their age. My old boss is now singing, bought himself a harley davidson, living the life. The older they get, people now enjoy their lives, and as a result look healthy and younger. It’s how you feel. When you talked about madonna, I thought she is famous What an excuse, we can all be young. Before when people get old, that means needing help, not working, etc. Now it means enjoying life, do quality things and working in areas you like as a retirement plan.
Good for you Pepper… that’s the spirit… :))
You’re quite right Monika… relevance is relative… and I wish you a wonderful 50th with all your senses… when the time comes… which it will… we don’t have to be able to dance like an 18 year old, but we can all learn from Pepper’s attitude… because this is the secret… staying interested, enthusiastic, & living alive…
And as for you my Dear THELMA… you kept that a great secret… ;) HAPPY BIRTHDAY – Χρόνια πολλά αγαπητέ Thelma – Alles Gute zum Geburtstag liebe Thelma… “I love you”… (don’t tell your husband ;)… Your friend & fellow PCB Warrior, Paul (just Paul ;)
All of this, reminded me the story of Dorian Grey…
But Madonna i guess is really the opposite..Inside and Outside she is stunning!! :)
However, i dont think i have a bad realatioship with aging..i mean i am almost 25 but i feel like i am 17…so i hope when i am 60 i will look as a 40 year old woman…:)
but i dont think that we should matter how we look on the outside..we should focus on the inside..After all our body is our ‘vehicle’ in this Life, for our soul to go further on Her path..
Maybe it is all the hardships that age us…on the outside..but for our soul there is no such thing as Time…
I believe everyone’s soul, is as a child…so fragile, and so beautiful, that the only restriction She has is this body we are living in..i wonder how Life would be , if there was not such thing as a body…for, the body, makes all things more complicated..
Love and Graditude
Annie
Like all aspects of life , It starts and ends with us .
You are who you desire to be ….. Plain and simple .
Love & Harmony
James
I completely agree with you. Our perception of aging is changing. On the one hand there are teenagers who think that people who is in his/her 30s are old people. On the oter hand i think that people in his/her 50s feel younger than other generations. I admire Madonna for her physical sahpe but i also think that, as Athena says in “Portobello´s witch”, (i dont know how they translate it en english… en spanish its “la bruja de protobello”) people is afraid of age, of getting old and we sholudn’t. Time is something a person cannot stop, we should accept it, but its very difficult nowadays, when we are pressed by media taht sells us stereotypes of the ideal man and woman.
Greetings. I enjoy all your books!
Milagros (Argentina)
PS: I wrote in english just i case you preferred it.
I have no ambition to think about Madonna. I only know, what I want to be when I will be 50 years old – still alive and able to live with all my senses, heart and soul!
Some may say of course, this is clear, you need not mention. But who knows my story, also knows, that it is not selfevident for me at all. Therefore I look upon these things a little bit different and this simplyfies my life in many respects.
Creio que não se trata apenas da nossa percepção do envelhecimento mas do prórpio processo em si. Acho que se envelhece muito mais lentamente e não tem apenas a ver com ginástica ou estilo de vida, É do próprio TEMPO. Cronos mudou os ponteiros do relógio que, agora, rodam muito mais devagar. Paradoxalmente, parece que tudo se passa mais depressa…é qualquer coisa a nível galáxico, divino…
Age is a funny thing. I think it all depends on what sort of life you lead plus there is the question of genetics. Sometimes it helps if you look after your mind, body and soul and sometimes you may do all you can to maintain that youthfulness and it makes no difference. I think society is obsessed with how a person looks and unfortunately people still tend to judge on appearance first. I think society places alot of pressure on people to look good. I think people should just be the best that they can be for themselves. I think that Madonna is amazing for 50 but she looks after herself and always has I believe. There are many ways of being youthful. Age really is just a number. I think sometimes it is a matter of attitude and that’s what I think Madonna has ‘a youthful attitude’.
Anyway, that’s just a few thoughts.
It’s a shame she didn’t invite you to the Vienna Concert tonight…;)
Keep on dancing into the light, Love, Paul
Hi All,
hmmm, i was just recently dicussing with my friend the definition of time. When, how , who has decieded to set day lenght for 24 hours, year for 365 days…What is the past, what is the present, what is the future? What is the reality, what is the illusion? Was time set to control people? To keep them worried, that they will not have enough time?
Fear is spirit killer…
I always say, it is all “in head” and all what counts is your awareness, of your own power within you…
Even Madonna has realised that, and her career is one great transformation from rebeloius seductive girl to mother to balanced empowered woman.
Yeah, she is empowered, she knows about it…
:-)and all you guys can feel her energy.
And i would not agree that perception on aging has change over the time…people have been always scared about being “old”, forgeting the fact, that those thoughts are the main root of their aging…Only now, there are more choices to keep you “fake young” (great money for smart plastic surgeons, hehhehe)
My soulmate’s dad’s was taking pictures on the beach with half naked girls at the age of 80 plus, my grand mother has worked all her life and survived world war 2 and she is now 83, using mobile phone and organizing “cinema sessions” for her neighbours at home while operating DVD player…
IT IS ALL IN HEAD…
so, look into person’s eyes…that’s the mirror of their soul…
:-)
cheers,
peace from slovakia
i.
Thank you all.
I think that I must answer honestly, because I have.. my birthday today. I am now 60 years old!! I am talking with all of you young and older and I learn from you and you learn from me.
How I feel?? When I am with my eyes closed, I feel as I am 18 years old. The golden age. Then I go to the mirror and I ..wake up!! I say jokingly to our friends, that we are ‘us’ but we have put the Mask of old people on. We may need ‘reading glasses’, my dear Paulo Coelho, but I read the other day that in a couple of years the Bionic eyes will be ready.
One thing for sure that I can affirm is that we never lose our ability and desire for love.
LOVE,
THELMA
It is true. Our perception is changing. It’s not just working out. I don’t work out a lot, but I am usually perceived as 10 years younger than my actual age! All in all, I think we live differently and we do have a different perception of life. In my country, Greece, the average childbirth age of women is 30-35 years old, while a quite remarkable percentage tend to have babies after their 40th birthday!
Good day to you all !
hi paulo i’m from venezuela, i hope you can read this.
Bueno mi opinión sobre la vejez es la siguiente, primero es algo que nos mentalizamos cada uno, el creerse viejos a partir de tal edad preestablecida 50 , 60, etc, es algo del pasado y no debe ser así hoy día tenemos que aspirar mas ya que las expectativas de vida han subido en todo el mundo por la ciencia de la salud, porque quiza sabemos más sobre nuestro cuerpo, etc… como comer, como evitar algunas enfermedades con vacunas, ejercicio, etc… además no queda atrás la cirugia plática pero más que eso creo que es algo que nosotros mismos podemos controlar con nuestro estilo de vida y madonna es un fiel ejemplo de ello, la admiro por eso y estoy feliz de que la tomes de ejemplo, tu eres otros de mis idolos, seria muy feliz si lees esto. besos de mi parte. Visita Venezuela!
Robelis Rodriguez.
I am 55 and have 12 grandchildren…but I am far from old. As my grandkids will tell you. I swim or do water aerobics for an hour every morning, am currently working on my masters – changing careers totally at this ripe young age. I have never been in better shape…physically or spiritually and it is my intent to keep putting one foot in front of the other in this direction til my time is up! Often society doesnt want to give jobs to people over 50…so I am going to create my own! Enjoy your day!
Yes,I guess. Although I think that Madonna and people like her are exsaggerating, because there is a limit…
Last time I saw Madonna’s show, I thought she were getting older… her movements on dancing are getting obsolete… Don’t you think?
There still are physical obstacle, even if we think we are young.
Our society asks us to work hard more and more, to refine ourself, to have more things, more money and finally to live better.We are always busy and discontent for what we already have. That’s why, in my opinion, mental age is changing.
We have to be conscious of the age we have and act without exagerate!
My perception about how to get old is the same since I was young. I am 50 years old . Maybe others (especialy young people)see me as a woman of my age ,but living in the present days. I feel different than I belived in my youth it would be . More,more… better from the point of view of the spiritual life and worse from the view of physical state.I had strongly belived in the posibility of mantining a perfect body shape but I have only obtained a different result: a permanent seaking from new knowledges/judgements/concepts/doing right and be a kind person. That permanent reserch satisfied me and helps me to identify ,to assure and to action to prevent/correct or to improve.
I can confirm the fact my mother looked more younger than Madonna, or me, etc.,at that age. And her physical state condition was better than the health condition of my generation.I think the previous generation considered themselves beeing old people but their body shapes were good. They were not allready old , but that status had an importance. They were old ,only in comparison with the major population part of those times. Beeing old mean more life experience, more achivements , more mistakes and sometime a pour mind/ health state.
New technologies and new descovered concepts help us to mantain a teen’s behaviour and the health of our bodies, minds and souls. We are modern due to our generation achivements. But we have to recognize that we are the results of our ancestors.The question is if we will mantain those present concepts and develop new ones and our kids generation will feel and seem to behave like teenagers at their 50 years old (from the point of view of how nice is the existence): If we will not have the same result ,or a better one, that means Madonna’s,Bill Gate’s etc. generations outputs fails. I wonder if our generation behaviour to mantain the feeling of youth will determine a lack of respect and love in our children reaction. Our real strength and our kids will confirm that ,in the near future.
Oh the the question of all time – Where is the Fountain of Youth …hmm…its not in anything outside of yourself ..it comes from with in – we all know that ..But Madonna as much as I love her music – and I love how driven she is ,she is talented yes but ! her never giving up plus her sheer persistence to make it ,is what has given her fame and fortune ..But she looks after her body which is a good thing -eats well – works very hard at everything ..I think it would have been better to see her grow old gracefully especially now ..But I think people age quicker these days because of stress and pressure from all areas etc ..But then there is this crap that society or the media put out there that if your not looking 20 0r 30 you wont get the part or your to old to have a no 1 single ..You have to be a size bloody O stick figure -frozen face ..miserable -but hey you look young ,.what is that ..I love looking at people who age gracefully -lines from laughter and tears ..marks and scars that are part of your life,journey .Men dont seem to worry as much as women about growing old . I dont think there isnt a woman alive who has not gushed over the likes of Sean Connery or Richard Gere ..hmm..well for me ..I certainly think that age adds sex appeal , and some people like older men or women I guess ..but you know that saying :Your as young as the woman your feeling : who made that up ?? getting off track now – Its about living -loving and enjoying yourself -and if someone judges you on your appearance or age then what ever !! Just age in the moment by moments ..
There is no time really ,so in saying that why does society say that by this age – such and such you should retire or leave school or you can now vote ?? It makes u wonder though if Madonna looks like this now – what will the next generation or pop stars look like in 50 yrs time ..maybe they will be so plastic by then that they will have to have full body genetic graphing stem cell stuff for everything ..Anyway I think Paul -that I am a bit the same about Madonna -I always wonder about her motives – too . Blessings Tania
Hi Paulo.
I hope you enjoyed the Madonna show as much as I did when I went to the first show in Cardiff, i believe Madonna is a huge fan of your work so I think she would have been honoured to know you were in the audience. I think she is a very good example of how , if you look after your body and exercise, then you can look and feel any age. She is extremely physically fit, no surgery or whatever can improve the way you move or dance so I think she deserves a lot of credit for being a 50 year old woman who can move better than Britney Spears.
As to your question, I think all people should be allowed to act the age they feel. It is not so much of the looks, as one person can look 60 but feel as fit as a 30 year old, and like me, be 30 but feel as fit and healthy as a 60 year old!! I used to work in the travel industry and I once heard of a 95 year old lady doing the Sydney Harbour Bridgeclimb. I think people want to exceed and better themselves nowadays to make a point that age is not a reason to slow down.
Dear Paulo,
Timely question and I am glad YOU asked us that. Actually I am terrified of getting older! Yes, I saw a picture of Madonna in a style mag called Grazia and well, she looks fit but also like she has to try harder to maintain those looks.
I recently finished with an assignment for a magazine where I had to profile five of the high-end salons in my city. That was a revelation. Personally I don’t wear make-up or have the need to color my hair. But when you put yourself in their shoes, for some it may well be a need, their job probably requires them to look the part, but I wonder how they feel when the make-up is off and the grey/white starts to show- all alone at night, on bad hair days? You know? Scary.
I’d like to think I will also age gracefully-am 41 now-and won’t have to run for cover that way. But yes, someone much younger once told me that age is just a number. Secretly I wish I would work on being healthier and fitter than I am currently .
I am of the opinion (and used to think it’s soooo unfair) that most men just keep getting better as they age than most women! Yes, Sean Connery, Harrison Ford, Robert Redford,Clint Eastwood,Richard Gere…It’s the person I guess and how they conduct themselves, about who they are inside. Again,some just can’t help having the bodies they have,or looking the way they do, isn’t it? So it becomes a burden,(the onus is on women anyways) this whole trip of looking younger,like your life depended on it?
Love,
Sheela Nandini
We all age wether we like it or not. Some choose to mature, and play the role of the old and wise. And some simply believe they are young at heart, and they bring it out to their lifestyles.
Aging or getting old,I believe,entirely depends upon how you look at it.People can get old,mentally/psychologically,even at the age of 20 and once you are mentally old,that impression is bound to show on your face.It’s all about keeping your mind flamboint,vibrant,radiant naturally you will look according to the age of your mind.Madonna has kept herself going and keeping it young through her dynamic personality and electrifying appearence.And just because,mentally she is as young as ever,it manifests in whatever she does. Madonna is a renowned person a high-profile celeb but there are loads of common people also who are not even under rigorous maintenance like stars but look younger than their age even after having hectic and stressful days at their respective workplaces[which are not pleasant and soothing most of the times].
This question got us all thinking.. certainly we are aging in a different way these days, as many have already pointed out. For me age has never had much of importance after 25 or so and I always found the question “how old are you” very uninteresting really and I’ve never had the need to know the age of people around me.
I believe your question is related to our attitude on time in general, as there are and has always been individuals who do not really fit into the pattern of measuring a lifetime in a chronological way. These persons are not “getting old” or they can be “old” from very early on in their lives; they have a state of mind that allows them to do things they aspire to despite their true age. No need to hang on to “looking young” because it simply does not matter. At least I would like to think so :)
Dear friends,
I have another angle for this subject. Why people want to be young ? My mother asked me few weeks ago how old does she look like. I of course know how old she is, so she just wanted a compliment. For me it is very strange that people want to be younger then they actually are. Let’s face the fact – there is no way to actually be younger, mentally or physically. I also don’t see a reason why one should be younger – with age comes the wisdom (or might come). So I propose a reason why some people want to be young forever.
I worked in a marketing for a while. It is very hard to find customers for a product in a middle-aged segment, because people in this segment are used to certain products and are happy with them. It is much easier to find customers in young-people segment, these people are not used to use something for a long time. So new products are marketed for young people. Then you want to expand your market and you say to middle-age people – look how beautiful and wise are young people using this and that. Older people think – it is very good to be young and I want to be young. I can be young by bying this and that.
Wish You the best
I agree with Lama the conditions are better now
for a certain part of the people .
I am talking about the poor people generally,their conditions are different.
It’s the manner of live,and if you don’t avoid to
take your challenges it keeps your soul young.
It’s also important to respect your limits.
I know people they are between 30 and 40 years old
they reacting like retired people.
Yes, I believe there has been a shift that goes beyond creams, vitamins, physical fitness. It’s a psychic shift. Remember the movie “Close Encounters of the Third Kind”? There were scenes where many different, unconnected people began sculpting, painting, fashioning a similar-looking mound. It came to be that it was the sight where the “close encounter” would occur. These people were subliminal accomplices in the awakening. All this to say: that’s how I see the changes in us these days. We change together – in varying degrees – without even deciding to do this. It’s evolution.
How old would you be,, If you didn’t know how old you are on papers,,, ???
to be old or young,,is influenced by society,,politic,,art,,trade,,, ,,,
and there are always some people,, who just don’t follow the prescription of getting old,,
The soul doesn’t get old that easy with some earthy year numbers,, and bodies,, are better taken cared,,
well,, if u let ur soul and body be what they really feel,, you might be surprised,,
and if you are an artist,,, your soul certainly doesn’t care what other prople mean about THE AGE,,,,the character has no age,, as long as u feed it,, as long as u r ready to learn like a child,, as long as u enjoy,,, as long as u believe in future,,and have HOPE,,
I see many things that are not right.Is true nowadays one can take care of his body and mind and to be healthier even than one young person that is spending night in bars .But in my country if you search a job,after 30 years,maximum 35,you encounter great problems.At interviews they ask for picture,before taking a look to your studies.If I call for applying to a job they cease speaking if they hear age might be over 30.I look much younger than my age,I always liked to live as healthy as possible,and persons dont know my age say that I am much younger.I think all is mess.I think all is relative,depends on the way one chose to live.
Hi!
Madonna is one of my all time favorites because she usually does what ever she wants. Even though she is an entertainer she does not try to please you, not in a way you see some of the young stars do. You know the music videos where they keep huffing and gasping and sighing with their pants up in their ass. Madonna just kicks ass and if we happen to like it, well, good then. It’s not about her age, is it? I also think that even she is such a celebrity for big audiences she doesn’t get enough credit for what she does. Because she is a woman? Because she does some “light” pop and not so “serious music”? I don’t know. Nevertheless she hits the pit over and over again. I think that it is because of her capability to hook on life and the force that drives it.
It is true that we are expected to look young these days. On the other hand, if you enjoy yourself, what does it matter? Look what ever you want. There’ll always be people who like you and people who hate you. In every age you are and/or feel.
I really believe that a persons physical age is reflected in their mentality. It is not enough to want to feel young but, rather, to know that you are young and have the mindset of one who is comfortable with that reality. On one hand, you have those who try to cheat their age by way of plastic surgery, a fancy youthful wardrobe, trying to stay ‘hip’ to the status quo and all this brings them is an aura of falseness. Then you have those who emit youthfulness in their mind and through their actions. They neither try nor abstain from anything that would necessarily permit them from the aging process – it is not of the mind but of the will of their spirit, or so I would believe.
Personally, I am 32 years old. I see people the same age as I and I am amazed how much older some of them seem. Then I find out how they live and take care of their mental well being, that those who do take good care of their state of mind and live a more (for a lack of better words) relaxed life will most likely match their physical being with their mental being… though I have a long way to go to be proven wrong :)
I always consider quality before quantity… it is not the length of life that is important, rather the quality with which you live it…
So many wonderful posts here… Thank you… Love Life, Paul
PS: I’m not sure of Madonna’s motives, but like us all… she’s living her personal destiny…
I am glad that you feel able to relate to Madonna’s music! Personally, I have loved her music since the 80s. Her ability to define style and re-invent herself with each shift in trends is amazing. She appears inexhaustible in creativity and limitless in energy, yet I always feel tired after watching her either perform or act. Why is that? Speaking only for myself, I feel as if she is always chasing something. Perhaps like many of us, she is afraid to get old(er) or lose youth. As an eight-year cancer survivor/thriver, my life and health have placed me in perspective: we are ALL going to die and I choose to define myself by the love I give, not by the love I seek.
My goodness Paulo, what motivates you to see Madonna in action?! ha ha.
Anyway, could it be that we are ‘requested’ by our society to look and act younger than our age? We need to conform to the ‘youthful’ society in order for us to have dignity in our current world. We even have plenty of products and services to prevent us ageing.
We used to look forward to being an elder for respects and wisdoms but our world has come a long way since then isn’t it?
The question is, is it a sin to be old?
On one hand I could find myself falling into the trap I believe we are different then our grandparents and parents. BUT they always seem to say they were old their whole life. On my high school wrestling team in 1978 our coach was 83. He did most of the exercises. I used to run with a man who was in his 80’s (he was a boxer)
BUT if you were to ask me why I think more people are getting more out of life then previous generations. In the industrial world even non-college trained workers are no longer doing manual labor 12 hours a day 6 to 7 days a week. Non-work life whether it be sport spiritual or a plain hobby gives these individuals greater joy. So now there is an opportunity that did not exist for our parents.
In my fathers day he said there was no little league baseball. Now not only is there little league, there are adult leagues.
Madonna is a performer, a dancer and an athlete. She knows what her body can and can not do. She knows her body could do in the past every day and what she can now only do a few times. I bet when she is in her 90’s she will still be stretching and doing activities associated with dancers.
Yo creo que la vejez es simplemente una idea. Si eres feliz contigo mismo y aceptas tu exterior de igual manera. Tu alma mostrara su juventud para siempre.
On dit que l’esprit des hommes se mésure para les questions qu’ils se posent.
L’évidence est que la jeunesse et la vieillesse sont liés a la société, en afrique les hommes agés sont sages. Dans d’autres espèces les animaux agés sont un problème, et ils sont oublié á leur sort loin de la communité, pour qu’ils trouvent la mort.
Certainement dans notre cadre social, nos aieux sont nos maîtres et ils ont leur respect.
La vieillesse actuelle est non plus jeune, mais plus libre qu’avant est plus motivé par les modes des communications qui existent aujourd’hui.
Donc je pense que comme toute génération on s’adapte et on étanche nos horizons, selon la longueur et mésure des chaines qui pesent sur notre liberté et nos pensées.
We shouldn´t be so agefixated I think ;-)
Why is it so important to look like a teenager when your 50?
Are you more happy then?
I think it´s kind of sad in some way.
It has turn in some hysteria in the west world:
Use this cream and you look 20 years younger *LOL*
I think it´s also about genes.
And maybe also what have happened to you thrue your life,
and how we handle our setbacks?
But the important thing I think is to try to stay young at heart.
Embrace life and enjoy, that has a healthy improvment of your body :-)
My biggest role model is my grandfather who attend a frenchcourse and computercourse of age 78.
And he also became a tour leader of travels for seniors :-)
And he never gives up, he is the most stubborn man I know, and he is now 84 years old.
And he still have the sparkle in his eyes :-)
Love to you all
/Jessica
Madonna es especial, es estupenda, de mi generación y ahora que recuerdo no puse en mi perfil ninguna música de ella, gustándome tanto, voy a ponerla.
Todo cambió en unos años, la forma de vertir, la forma de llevar la vida que hace que el caracter imprima mas jovialidad, aun así por dentro a veces piensas que ya te haces mayor, eso no lo puedes evitar por momentos hasta que te olvidas de la edad y sabes que lo que importa es vivir rodeada de amor por todas partes.
Un beso Paulo.
OOPS doesn’t qualify, for NHS, being too old, I meant to say.
Hi all
MY father and sir Patrick Stewart are the same age – one was voted world’s sexiest man (at age 65) and the other, less known to the world, DOESN’T QUALIFY for NHS treatment of narrowed arteries in the leg due to cholesterol
– one could afford plastic surgery if so desired
and the other would think it a preposterously ridiculous idea and laugh asking why.
People who live the good life and who earn lots of extra money don’t have to grow old, those who work for a megre living, grow old whether they like it or not.
our bodies wear out eventually, that is a fact, and it is a sad society fact that money can be used to prevent this from happening.
LOVE always
xxxx
The world is crossing legs and arms, watching those who are brutally killed everywhere. The third world is soaked into wars, hatred, agony and suffering to serve the first world’s demands of food, drink, energy and leisure. Everyone places his own rules and plays by them, and when I say everyone I mean those ones who exist not those ones who are not even living below the poverty line. The Earth’s resources are more than enough to cover the needs of the 6 Billion inhabitants but because the world is separated into First and Third that only 20 % of the inhabitants get to live and the rest get to die either quickly before the age of 6 or slowly after the age of 18!!
Come to Africa and you can see that children under 6 have already developed white hair and started complaining about the toughness of life!!
My conviction is that youth is more a matter of spirit than of age.
Also that if you make sure to respect your body and spirit, by making sure they can maintain themselves at all ages, you can live much longer than we used to. The problem is, again, with the fact that the society tells us that at some age somehow, we should be “old” and only do things that the “old” do. Clearly, dancing is not among those things.
Anyway, it is funny that you put this topic as the question of the week, as I posted on my personal blog this morning (http://is.gd/2Y9b – In french…) a text written by general MacArthur in 1945, that gives a very “modern” view of what youth is.
Our perception hasn’t changed! We really are younger!
As medicine and quality of living have advanced, we really are healthier at the age of 50 than we were 50 years ago. We live for longer now; 80,90, whatever.. and so.. being 40 or 50 isn’t that bad. If you look at less developed countries, with shorter life expectancies, people seem older at younger ages.
I will argue though, that it is not necessarily a good thing. The fact that we live for longer now can arguably be considered a bad thing, especially if you look at quality of living after the age of 50.
Hi. How are you? I missed you. Think something: You are young. When my father had your age, he marriaged with a woman twenty year younger than his and had more two sons.
So you can live more many years and drem much more.
Belive in GOD and trust him.
JESUS CRISTO can save you. I think you are saved.
GOD blass YOU.
Hi Paulo,
I believe our perceptions of age are changing. Largly due to a culture that emphasises and values being ‘forever young’, which pressurises a lot of people to living up to this ‘norm’. Also I think better eating habits,exercise and healthcare has something to do wth looking younger and living longer. But for me the most interesting question is “do we look younger and live longer because our expectations are higher?”. Self fulfilling prohecy? I was reading an article last week that suggested we could live way into our 100’s if that was the normal expectation. It was suggested that because we expect to live to around 70 to 80 that was more likely to happen. The fear of being on our own, outliving friends and relatives was not a happy prospect for most people. So the article was suggesting we psychologically affect how long we live. An interesting point….
Hola!
Yo recuerdo que cuando era pequeñas las chicas de 29 años me parecían muy mayores… y hoy no me considero muy mayor…mmm
De todas formas, creo que la idea de que a ciertas edades antes la gente se considerara mayor y ahora no sea así es por la forma en la que vivimos y lo que vivimos. Quizá la forma de pensar que tenemos ahora y la fomra de actual socialmente sea lo que nos hace sentirnos más jovenes… y ya se sabe que el pensamiento es muy poderoso.
Besos desde Barcelona.
***************************************************************
Hello!
I remember that’s when I was little girl, the girls aged 29 seemed very old to me … and today I did not feel too old … mmm
Anyway, I think the idea that’s a certain age before people are considered more and now is not the case for the way in which we live and what we live. Maybe the thinking that we have now fomra of current and socially is what makes us feel younger … and we know that the thought is very powerful.
Kisses from Barcelona
I think people have changed their mentality for better about it and it is going to change more from now on…
That is a result of the globalization and the misigenation of cultures.
thanks Paulo for your comment.
Hello Paulo,
I think it is amazing in American society that a 50 year-old can be a sex symbol for the teenage generation. It is very different in South Korea, where I was born. I was raised in the States since age four, so am very American in my perspective, despite having been raised with strict Korean parents in Los Angeles. When I went to live in Seoul for a year recently, I felt so old (at 34) because that is what everyone told me! I don’t know if it has changed recently, but it seemed that Korea did not have any female sex symbols over 30. I argued with my Korean friends that in America, we have hot, older sex symbols like Madonna, Demi Moore, even Pamela Anderson. It is as if in Korea, women reach a certain age and aren’t allowed to be sexy anymore.
Definitely in America and many other parts of the world, the concept of aging is changing. The old cliche is true: you are only as old as you think (and feel). Madonna has the body and physical fitness of a twenty year-old. She takes care of herself, exercises every day, eats a healthy diet, and rarely eats sugar. Most importantly, she loves being an entertainer and expressing herself creatively, so that keeps her looking vibrant and youthful, as well. Whether or not one agrees with her personality, she is helping change the perceptions of age and aging.
I am 40 now and I feel like I’m 24. I’m exploring all the possibilities of life that weren’t apparent to me when I was younger, and it makes me feel alive in a new way.
Also, Paulo, look at you! You are 61, but I bet you feel much, much younger. HOW OLD DO YOU FEEL?
Love,
Helena S.
Eu acho que existe um preconceito em relação a idade, ainda hoje.
Não é porque a gente tem 50 que vai deixar de sentir as mesmas coisas que uma pessoa mais jovem. Pelo contrário tudo fica MUITO MELHOR.Pode crer que a experiência conta.Por isso o ditado de que: um relacionamento depois dos quarenta anos fica melhor é a pura verdade, porque tudo é muito mais intenso.
Eu acho que na questão do vestir-se exige cuidados para não cair no ridículo, porque a sensualidade está em outro momento.
Você comenta sobre o relacionamento de seus pais e eu lembro-me dos meus avós que ficaram casados mais de 60 anos. Educação tradicional, ele bem rigoroso por sinal e advogado. Mas na questão do relacionamento dos dois, sempre foram o casal comentados.
Eles trocavam bilhetinhos sempre, cartas de amor. Minha avó sempre ligava prá ele no escritório, deixava poesias na mala dele , as vezes ia buscá-lo pessoalmente. Ele jamis sentou-se a mesa sem a presença dela. Declarava-se mesmo na nossa frente que a amava. Tinha final de semana que “gostavam de ficar sozinhos”, dispensavam até as empregadas. O Amor, a paixão não tem idade; apenas Amor.
É claro que o corpo já está meio “passadinho”, mas as rugas não atrapalham, a beleza, da vida do amor.
Então….todos acima dos 50….”vamos sacudir o esqueleto”. É muito bom prá espantar energia parada.
Os anjos gostam de dançar, a Alma fica alegre e feliz.
beijos,
Mari Raphael.
Hi!!!
I think that the perception of aging has changed in some countries, but in some not (so fast or not yet). I make an example…
I am 28 years old now.. In my country Venezuela, with my age you should be married, with kids,pretty seriuos with a serious job…, quite different from Europe for example. When I see my friends of my same age they look much older than me now.
Here in Spain, where I live now is quite different. I was married with 25… everyone told me “Ohh my God, but you are so young!!!” People is not old at 60…In TV they speak about “the young people programs.. of 35 or less…” that would be a big joke in my country! and in latin-america generally speaking!
So, summaryzing, I think that perception is changing, in some countries as they are much older and have learned some things already, they have changed the idea before the rest… but of course is a matter of perception & time, the same case as the beauty cannons…. I am the same person here and there!!!
Another thing is that we are improving our live expectancy more and more… that also helps on this aging perspective.. but as well as I said before depends on the country and situation…that could be better in so many countries of the world….
The key on this change, is to keep fears aside, and don’t put limits on what you can do with your biological age.
Big hugs x everyone
Maria de Lourdes
What a timely question. I’ve been craving play lately, but had been struggling to find where to start. So, I asked the universe to send me a sign, so that I could take my first steps into something creative. Where do I begin? The very next day (three weeks ago) I heard about a festival in Newport, RI called “Open for Dancing” that was needing more community volunteers to participate in choreographed performances; “no age limits and no dance experience required.” That fit the bill perfectly so I jumped at the chance. My hands immediately began to sweat, so I knew I needed to do it. Thank you, universe!!!
This past Wednesday, the 17th, the rehearsals started. After 3 days of rehearsals, we had 3 performances on both Saturday and Sunday. It was somewhat improvisational, with some practiced pieces to connect the elements and deliver the message. It was a very modern, interpretive performance about life’s rituals… pain, suffering, love, death, celebration… the rhythms of life. And there I was… the left brained IBMer… experiencing my part of the piece… and loving it. I can’t remember having so much fun. I felt like I was ten years old again, though this time with the confidence and experience of a 43 year old. What could be better. I even got to bow! I am now a performer! What a thrill!!
On my drive home yesterday, after a wonderful dinner with everyone involved, I just finished listening to an audiobook “Gargoyle” by Andrew Davidson. In the book he states that our bodies are most beautiful and perfect at the age of 20 years. But at 40 and above, our internal selves are even more beautiful and perfect; so as long as we connect to that inner beauty, it will reflect on the outside and we will still be beautiful. That’s not an exact quote, but it is the basic message I got. I believe that as we increase our expected life spans, we must stretch our understanding of age. The numbers should not shut doors, but instead maybe open new ones. I’m in search of finding more groups or experiences that are offered to the “beautifully experienced” people. We have to think differently and shake off any old assumptions. Wrinkles shouldn’t limit us, they’re just a reflection of the paths we have taken thus far in our journey. So… I challenge you all to go outside and play. Don’t believe anyone who tells you that you are too old to do something. We may have to be creative about how we do something, but I don’t think there is any limit to what we can do. We can choose to change the rules. Let’s go out and do just that!! .
Go play!!! – Laura
BTW, here is a link to the Island Moving Company’s website if you would like to learn more about the festival and other creative efforts that are underway. I adore these people… they are reaching out beyond the traditional definition of what a dance company is focused on. And, I am so happy that they reached me.
http://www.islandmovingco.org/
Dear Paulo,
Age is nowdays almost personal choice. I am almost your age, I dance like fool every now and then, last year I started to learn new language, my nephews are mre attached and nearer to me then to their parents, and I am ready to learn, live and remain young without plastic surgery….
As you say, when I think what my mother was at my age I can not help but think why her life was “older” than mine.
She was extraordinary person and yet time was not clement to her !
My father was ageless to the last day of his life, he lived to be 90 strong, wilful and selfsufficient, and yet he remained fatherless when he was only 4 years old, survived two world wars and the war the worst of all in Croatia (downfal of Yugoslavia)
I do not like Madonna, never liked her as she struck me as superficialy provocative. It has nothing to do how old is she and what she demonstrates. On the other side I like Tina Turner another ageless music-icon.
The real age is in our mind and years make us only rich, not old.
Thank you for question my ageless friend.
Love,
Luce
I guess as with Madonna’s Case, The stereotype of typical aging has been changed.
This is probably due to society’s advancements and man’s evolution as a whole; we redefine stereotypes now.
Aging is a physical and mental process as well as the human body sees changes both physically and in the way they tackle problems. I guess this has its pros and cons but rhetorically, as we progress further up the chart of evolution, things change.
Changes in age may have yet been redefined, for the society will continue to develop and grow, thus the future is largely untold of the effects of aging.
Cheers!
I agree with many things I read so I may repeat some of them.Firstly, yes our perception about when we get old has changed and it is normal because the age expectancy has augmented.there were times that the average life expectancy was 35, so a 30 year old man was considered old but nowadays he is considered a young man.Also, in our times we seem to be more open about what we are supposed to do in our age.However, from what I see I observe that when we refer to if you are young or old according to your age(=numbers) there are not specific limits.For example, children see their parents as old people even if they are not more than 50 and I remember one day I was discussing with my grandmother and she told me about a woman that died of cancer and she said “and she was such a young woman” and I asked her how old she was and she answered me “65″.You see what I mean?
I do not believe numbers are important.It is true what they say that the important thing is how you feel.If you have energy and you make dreams and you are fighting and as Kristin said if you smile and you give love you will always be young.I believe our age is part of who we are and we should’nt feel bad about it or be ashamed of it or hide it.It’s just a number!!!If we love and respect ourselves we will be ok with our age too.I think all the ages have something beautiful and if we don’t accept our age we will lose it and we can do many things but we can not go back to time to live something that when it was time to do it we let it go,for example childhood and the innocence of that time.
Our society has an obsession not with being young but with”looking young”.that’s why we have botox and surgeries etc.But all this is an illusion and will not make us happier nor younger.And this is also a reason why some people are so scared of aging.
Love,
Lia
p.s.Madonna is great and so is Harrison Ford and I never cared about their age!!!
Dear Paulo,
Hello… I think a little time ago people are beeing and acting more youngful then in the near past, not everybody, surely. Maybe is because science and medicine, maybe because social habits that changed, maybe because the “beauty market” that we are all inside. The vanity, in a part, the expectation of live more then our parents, for other.
There is a mith that talks about that, if I am not mistaken, and you probably know about it, the Medusa one’s. Cleopatra was also considered a woman in history that wants not to be old, and preserve her beaute.
regards from taipei,
Denny
Age is mental. We are fortunate to have wealth of information available about healthy lifestyles, which leads to more energy and a more holistic self-image, causing us to feel better and, thus, perhaps ‘younger’. This can be strangely and ironically juxtaposed with society’s obsession with youth and anti-aging; our fear of being considered ‘old’ causes us to pursue things that promise to keep us young. As many have already mentioned, a curious, whimsical mind that is available for brainstorming any subject is the crucial element to keeping the spirit youthful.
Living life to the full means different things to different people; to use your example, Madonna has always pushed things, asked us to reconsider our prejudices. I respect her energy, her ability to stay relevant and her (seemingly) genuine love for her craft of entertaining. I look at her and hope I can have that sort of focus when I am her age.
I always think those who smile stay young, and those who laugh are the youngest spirits of them all. Thank you for this question. As it’s my birthday this week, this is all the more relevant.
Bueno, los cantantes debemos mantenernos tonicos. Yo, ademas de escribir y estudiar psicologia, estudio canto lirico (Opera) y hago natacion y salgo a correr, debido a que mi tonicidad muscular debe permanecer estable para poder manetener todo mi fisico para estar apto para poder cantar, que requiere mucho esfuerzo.
No me sorprende que Madonna, a sus 50 años este esplendida, ademas, convengamos, que la imagen vende mucho, y sobre todo en unha mujer, por lo tanto, debe cuidarse, y si es posible, tambien con cirugias, que de seguro las debe de tener.
Un abrazo Paulo.
I think that aging is more mental than physical, unless of course you have a personal trainer, personal chef and a great plastic surgeon. HOwever, there is something to be said for following your heart, and while Madonna isn’t my favourite artist, I think she is very brave and ballsy to have followed her passions from such a young age. Perhaps it is pursuing your personal legend which keeps a person young at heart, and the youth shows up in the physical body.
I think that the age is on the Id Card and on our mind…
I am 29 years old and i can´t imagine myself on this age… I am 18 or 19…
Yes… i think we are changing our perception of how to get hold.
yes !
thanks to the toils of our forefathers, now most of us ( the middle class and above ) have an abundance, we don’t really have to worry about where we will live or from where will the meals come. previous generations toiled to bring us to a condition where ‘luxuries’ are available to most. life expectancy and looking / feeling old has some relation to poverty also.
that and a silent revolution in mass communication where stories of people living upto ripe old age of 100 +, of these new age ideas of positive thinking, ‘letting go’ etc etc have worked on our mind set.
anyway paulo, u don’t have to worry about being old and all, u are gonna die young, that does not mean die soon, it means whenever u will breath your last, i am sure your child like curiosity and sense of awe at this universe will remain as alive as they have been.
love
aditya
We grow old because we stop playing! Joy is joy, regardless of whether we are 9 or 90… if it is dancing, then let’s dance… Dad, used to say to me…. When you are 20 you have so much to prove… When you are 30 you have so much still to do … Now that you are in your 40’s what do you have to prove? To whom? There is nothing to do but to enjoy life… at your age you should not care what others say… live, love and play and you will get to be my age…. and 93 is not a bad one….
As he taught me ‘I am old enough to know what I want, what I want to reach for… and young enough to carry it out and achieve it’
Love always and in ALL ways,
My ex-husband and I had a discussion along these lines just last night. We were talking about how how mother is eligible to retire in about 3 years, and yet, she looks young, acts young…this is a woman who still goes out dancing with friends on weekends. Perhaps it is a change in attitude, but mostly I think that the closer we get to an age that we previously thought was “old”, we realize it wasn’t old to begin with.
People probably don’t say; ‘Behave your age’ as much as before. However, mind you…it’s proven, adults played much more games in the middle age, than we do now. I am almost inclined to say most of the time, we in our modern world, stay so much in control of ourselves, living this mainly intellectual life, that we don’t let go of the control,and have fun at all. I realized this fact years ago, when I was in the university, and a good friend always told me; ‘you are so intellectual, get out in life and live’.
Do I respect Madonna as an artist? I certainly appreciate much of her work, i.e. the video with the matador. Would I want Madonna to be my mother? Absolutely not. Many of values she represents, I don’t think will contribute to build a better world. I do admire her energy and dancing skills, and why not, if you got it, use it.
Aging is an individual thing. I was born old. I have never and will never dance around in fish net stockings and black vinyl. My parents are young (mid 50s)but have been geriatric for years. I do think there’s a difference though between aging youthfully and acting like a child. I’d rather age youthfully. :)
My mother, did not look her age, did not dress her age, was highly unusual and individual, suffered more than most (she lost her husband when very young and died after fighting two terrible illnesses).
But she really knew how to love, and lived life to the full with compassion and no regret. (Although her parents were very traditional).
She has given me a good ethos, don’t fight age, because it is inevitable, but, embrace life to the full regardless, and do not deny yourself experiences because you think you are too old or it is too late to try them.
She also wore a brooch like the one in Image of the Day, which probably has reminded me how very special she is in my heart.
Aging has definitely become a different phenomenon today…its become mostly a biological thing…its no longer psychological…in fact people seem to be getting younger as they age…as financial security, a sense of confidence in thier own abilities and a better understanding of the world sets in … people begin to start looking for the things they want to do, the things that make them happy, and suddenly you see grown up men takign to racquetball, cricket, football, running, gymming, hanging out with friens etc like never before…40 is the new 20 for sure and life seems to really begin at 50
one genration ago…like you said….50 was like the twilight zone…you would avoid playing loud music if someone that ‘old’ was around…today 50 year olds are rocking party circuits…
Good stuff…
Me
I believe we can somewhat influence our mental and physical age with how we think. As we can with everything else. With what we wish for with a good heart and belie. Believe you are old at fifty, and you will be just that. Believe you are young at fifty – with your heart and your feelings – and you’ll be young. Even look younger. But you have to “own” these thoughts. Always be curious and enthusiastic about something will also do a lot. Society even welcomes this today :)
Yet another fantastic question! Merci!
Society as a whole does view aging much differently now than in previous generations. Unfortunately, for most people this is translating into hair dying, botox injections, face-lifts & any number of self-loathing attitudes for failing to live up to the idea of perfection that is presented us at every turn for every age group. Not having lived in other generations, it is difficult to say for certain, but it certainly does feel that we are not embracing our capacities as we age. Instead we are afraid of aging. The two are fundamentally different things. The result may be an appearance of youth well into our later years, but the underlying drive (for many, in particular celebrities) is not necessarily a youthful inner attitude. It is this that is translating into what we are calling “vibrance” as we age. To say someone “looks their age” has become an intense insult, even an implication that their value in society has disappeared (a sentiment with which I do not agree BTW).
On the flip side of this, we ARE retaining our capacity for physical movement much further into life, but then again, we are living much longer than previous generations. There are a plethora of reasons for this, both psychological and physical, but I will stop myself here or I may take up more space than I politely should. Perhaps I will consider this further and post an Op-Ed on my own site.
Thank you again for this great question and for consistently reminding those who find you that our purpose here on this little spinning ball of water is to consider all that we can, constantly, while trying to use our considerations to better ourself and our world. Your candor and openness to response is inspiring!
On the one hand, yes, I’d say our idea of aging and our perception of aging is definitely changing. Social structures are changing, whole societies are in course of getting old and find themselves suddenly wondering what to do about it and how to cope.
On the other hand it probable alway had something to do with or rather depended on milieus, on social environments. Someone doing a job for forty, fifty years looking forward to his or her retirement (and then doing nothing or just watching tv all day etc.) perhaps will feel and be quite old by the time it actually happens. Some doing a job (or something) that’s also his or her life and who doesn’t think or care about the retirement age and simply continues doing that probably has at least better chance of staying young(er).
But that’s overall much less of a (strong-ish) opinion but really just a personal impression …
:) Yesterday evening I washed my feet in the washbasin, and told to myself I was still suple at nearly 40. :) Well, I think because I made gymnastics, volley, softball, Taï Chi, swimming-pool…
Madonna is a sporty type. Maybe that’s why. Though my grand-parents and parents have more to think in working very young, with then obligations towards their children.
But there might be families of this generations that were athletics. Surely, at this time, it was reserved to rich people, though now clubs and associations in or out of school, permit to make sports, for low fares.
Happy monday to all space cowboys and cowgirls ;)