How many times did you reinvent yourself in your lifetime?
I’m asking this because I saw this week the new movie by Clint Eastwood the Gran Torino and I’ve been following Clint Eastwood since his beginnings as an actor in class-B spaghetti westerns.
In my book The Alchemist, Santiago, the shepherd boy, has to reinvent himself in order to get to his goal. I have also been in this situation and had to reinvent myself many times.
So now I would like to know about you: How many times have you re-invented yourself and in which situations?
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What an interesting question Paulo, since I woke up with this question in my head this morning..I think re-inventing comes with a new insight and every morning I wake up to a new day
often, really often
and what`s not new about this, only LOVE brought me to that point again and again…
as it`s not as it`s shown in media,
LOVE is meeting oneself ad you got reinvent everything if you`re not already satisfied with just next to someone and dedicate yourself to raise up children who have to live the not lived life of their parents
It seems to me that every time when finds themselves at a crossroads in there lives you can two one of tow things. You can either become complacent and hope that everything will pass with time, or you can learn from your situation and use this as motivation to become something more.
Recently I have been taken away from what I thought was my true love. Instead of wallowing in my sorrow, I have been trying to use this negative energy and make myself become constructive. I have realized everything that had been lost over the course of our relationship, because truly nothing was as important to me as being by her side. I have since realized everything that I have let go and tried to regain myself image and surpass it. I have become more physical aware of my actions trying to one my body, watch m eating habits, and tone down the consumption of alcohol. This was step one. Next I have made myself more socially aware of those around me and embrace my friendships more than I have in years. I have become more spiritually aware attending church, Buddhist temples, acupuncture, and once again am doing Tai Chi. I have become more aware of my psychological deficiencies and have tried to make myself an all around more positive person. Lastly, I am beginning to once again following my dreams. This includes, but is not limited to, learning music, traveling, and furthering my education.
I think that ever time we reinvent ourselves we take a part of who we were and push it to the limit until it becomes something even more. Weather it’s moving, staring a new job, beginning a relationship, ending one, traveling to far away places, welcoming a new life, mourning someone that passes, finding God, or basically any pinnacle or emotion, we find ourselves trying to be better. It is really the only thing we can do.
I think several times, but one that is memorable now is the one it took to quit smoking.
It is always said that “life is a self fulfilling prophecy”.
That is, what you imagine and envision for yourself will become a reality.
One day, in creating an image of the future me, I realised that I wanted to be the kind of person who doesn’t smoke.
It worked, and I have since tried that technique several times to achieve goals in my life.
Que te puedo decir….
Creo que cada ves que decidimos iniciar una nueva etapa en nuestras vidas, debemos reinventarnos, mi nuevo nacimiento o mejor dicho mi mayor reinvencion ocurrio desde el dia que me entere que seria madre, mi vida comenzó nuevamente siendo muy chica, pero ha sido lo mas bella que me ha ocurrido hasta hoy… Soy una madre muy feliz y aunque paresca muy pretencioso de mi parte creo y estoy casi segura que soy una de las mejores madres del mundo y no dudaria en decir que a mi corta edad lo he hecho muy bien….
Ahora a pesar de ese gran cambio, esoy viviendo nuevamente un proceso de reinvención o evolución, estoy buscando mi centro, mi pasión, estoy decidiendo que rumbo tomar para encontrar mi leyenda personal…Y espero seguir disfrutando de cada nueva etapa que deba superar y siendo feliz en mi camino…
Mil besos
Dear Paulo,
What I am about to write down, might seem as a collection of loose facts but I feel they are connected and would like to share them with you.
Although I have been working with Brazilian clients for many years, the irony was that I only discovered you after I stopped working on Brazil as an area of attention. By sheer coincidence I bought your book the whitch of Portobello and I was so intrigued by this book that I read all your books including the pilgrimage to Santiago. I read the Pilgrimage to Santiago and By the River Piedra I sat down and Wept at a time in my life where I wanted to reinvent myself so on a whim I forced my husband to come with me to the Pyrenees and to visit Lourdes in Feb 2008. Although I was not sure what kind of answers that trip would give me and without any other purpose we visited Lourdes and since I announced this also to my colleagues, one of my colleagues with whom I have the longest working relationship and know the best asked me to light a candle for him. So I lit a candle for my family, for the dead, the living, my colleague and myself and I drank some water. After having visited Lourdes I had the strong urge to go to Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port to see the beginning of St Jacobsroute. I would have loved to have walked the route but my physique is not that great so we drove a bit up to Roncevales and returned. That more or less concluded our trip and we flew back to the Netherlands the next day. Directly after that trip my life changed dramatically when I turned out to be pregnant which is something that physically I had been told was close to impossible. I had never seriously considered children as it was not possible and to be honest I was quite caught up in my career as a banker. The pregnancy itself was a big bet and several physicians advised terminating it because they thought the threat to my health was too big and it was a whole theater to get a doctor that seriously wanted to support me. Although I had doubts myself and was scared, what finally convinced me was the fact that I had visited Lourdes and during the lighting of the candle had asked to give me a sign as to how to reinvent myself and although I am a rational personal and normally take decisions based on reasons, I decided to follow my intuition and my feeling for once. So I went for it and against all odds my daughter was born after 38 weeks on the 16.10.2008 in full health. I am so grateful for her, she is teaching me something every day; the most important thing being ‘ to love someone is to see the face of god’. I now try to be more in touch with my feelings/intuition and to listen to what nature has to tell me. It makes me feel balanced. In the beginning of February 09, when I returned to work, the colleague I had lit a candle for in Lourdes announced that he is going to do a pilgrimage by bike to Santiago do Compostella from Rotterdam in April 09. I have asked him to take a gemstone on my behalf and to bring it with him on his pilgrimage and to put it down at the Cruz de Ferro, for me this somehow makes the circle round.
abraco
Do
Everytime I hear something that touches my soul
A very thought-provoking question:
Does the caterpillar reinvent itself? Does it choose to become a flutterby?
I guess to me, re-inventing is different from growing or the outworking of life’s process.
I’ve been through stages and phases, most of which were not planned by me. Only once did I “reinvent myself”, and that was when I chose to leave corporate life and become self-employed. And then, I was only able to do it when the stars lined up just so.
All the other changes in my life, no matter how dramatic they were, were a matter of growing, not conscious re-inventing.
I am re-inventing myself or rather re-programming myself every single day of my life. There are the easy re-inventions where situations are so intense or tragic that you can’t help but change your way of thinking. Although the situation you had to deal with might have been difficult the transformation is relatively easy because your emotions were so intense that they shook your very core. It’s hard to get to the core at the best of times. The difficult re-inventions are the moments when we have those revelations or awakenings and at the time you feel enlightened. I speak for myself only, but trying to apply this to your everyday living is what is difficult. But everyday I keep trying, slowly trying to take what’s in my mind and connect it to my soul so that it becomes a part of me.
Hallo Paulo,
I think that it is necessary to change without end in the positive kind of way. Life is changing without end. If life is a river and you want to swim, you will never swim in the same water.Today I read a quote: “the bend in the road is not the end of the road, unless you fail to make the turn.
Love from Holland
Marika
Wait, I was wrong!! My Piratebay is not blocked yet!! Lol… I thought I would have to reinvent myself, but I can stay the same now, je je je. I am so happy!
Dear all,
I really find this an interesting question since I ‘m in the middle of a personal crises myself. I am 31, and mother of two beautifull boys. I see re-inventing yourself as a personal growth you make during different stages in your life-time. It feels like re-making contact with hidden or lost pieces of yourself, that due to external circumstances or inner false believes were locked away. The need to do that for me started with the feeling of a loss, it was the loss of the idea that I could control life to a certain degree and could only live my life in function of other people, constantly proving myself that I was worth their attention and love. With almost giving birth to my second son my twinsister moved to Australia, wich for me is the other side of my world. She was a very important part of my life and being born the same day and sharing everything while growing up, I learned very well how to look after someone else and holding yourself back for the other. For the first time I really felt on my own…
The birth of my son and her leaving were two very emotional events short after one another. My second boy turned out to be a very demanding baby because of reflux, so the first year was very stressfull and me and my partner both responded to that in a totally different way, as we also did with the first baby, it made us grow apart. It became too much for me to give all my love and energy to the little one and at the same time trying to continue with pleasing my partner the way I did before. I was so afraid of losing his love that I blocked it out and told myself I don’t need this burden, of questionning myself constantly wheater I am or am not good enough for him. If I am not, then I will only lose the Idea of someone who loves me, he was never there for me to begin with. He is only there because it makes his life easier, and when it doesn’t anymore he gets angry with me, my dreams are not important for him, I can follow them as long as it doesn’t demands anything from him. It was just an idea i was trying to hold on to, giving all my energy to, but to what point? Completely losing myself.
Life has many unexpected changes and changes continuousley. I ‘m trying to let go of my control of love, and started to think of what I wanted in life, started to reconnect with my dreams, thinking that one can chase them, but never really knows where it will lead you. At some point you need the guts just to have faith that you will find a way through whatever life throws at you, you will find in all moments some degree of happyness and some degree of Loss and sadness, toughness. You have to let go of the past with the wisdom it has brought you, you need to be able to look at what there is now, and you need to decide what you want to go for and whom with in the future, and than jump and go for it.
Yes, people are selfish beings, even the ones who claim they are not, it’s always a matter of finding a good balance, but life will only make you really happy if you can live it at your own terms while carrying the consequences of that, surrounding you with people who can accept you for who you are, a growing person, not labeled to become what others want, but free to become whomever you want to become. For me I want to become a loving mother, I want to be able to create a loving caring homenest, where they can start dreaming their own dreams and strenghten their resevoirs of love and selfbelieve. I want to become a good therapist, I work with kids and also for them I want to enlarge their selfbelieve by experience of trust, kindness, good things, and encouragement to overcome obstacles by themself.
It needs a lot of strenght and courage to follow your own path, and some people after a while stop trying to persue their own dreams and become depressed and holow, until something forces them to take the next step and re-invent themselves, and sometimes for some people that moment never comes.
I am still in doubt whether to seek for a living on my own, or staying with my partner. It depends on his possiblity to change and grow with me…while I am still re-inventing myself…I gues for the first time!
love, Ana*
Good evening,
First of all, to be able to survive in the world jungle, we have to adapt and develop new skills = to transform ourselves = to re-invent.
Now speaking about great radical self-re-inventions, yes, I had to do that several times, not too many, as I found it dangerous and not normal to happen for my soul.
Let’s see:
No.1 – In kindergarden – transformed myself from a wild unsociable little girl that grew up home, in everybody’s leader (faste and shortly… :)
No.2 – (at 10 years old) When moving with my parents from a small decent city to the biggest and “jungle like” city of the country, in a really tough area. So I had to become tough, really-really tough and don’t cry but only home in my bed…That’s hard job for a little kind girl (still having kind of a leader potential)..:)
No.3 – (at 16-17) When my parents separated from each other, and I went straight to a yoga community and “hide” my pain in meditations and light spiritual activities
No.4 – (at 18) When my parents made-up and I was against that as actually nothing changed between them and things went worse. At that moment, as I lost my yoga colleagues after my father’s pressures, I found others, at highschool. They were simply people that go to church more often then others (Christian).So, for 5 years of my life, I have choose church full-time as my hidding box, but I had a very big surprise: it wasn’t a box, it was the perfect moment to have “open years” to what I didn’t “have time” to hear: God. And I wont say too many about that, it is private and it is so dear to my soul.
No.5 (the last one) – When becomming a mother (and later on, a single mother). Mother = LEON. I found a HUUUUUGE courage to face my all fears (hope so…).Now it’s the moment when I had the courage to fight oppenly with the most tough enemy I have ever met: my family (they created me, so, please,….no comments here)… :) And also now I have finaly the courage to candidate for a management position. Guess what: I wan. There was potential, but no support from no-one, family or husband, my main “point de refference” in this world. And, you know, when someone who you love-love-love with all your HEART and BODY actually kills you as a person “in the name of love”, yeah, right) tells you: you ar not good, your so and so… you kind of believe that, don’t you?…
And now I am looking forward for my next evolution level.
(let’s see the good side of the business: I was never bored)
Shankar: reinventions can, of course, be something that shakes us deeply, and which we usually notice as the time has passed… as You said in Your post before.
But I do think that we are able to reinvent ourselves, even frequently, maybe not so dramatically/critically and profoundly (but which still are reinventions). Maybe not so visibly.
PS! To one, career-shift can be re-skilling, but to another person it can represent something different – it depends on their dream of life, where they are trying to get to. For someone the career-changing can actually be the re-invention of their life – finally learning what they are supposed to, and what they want to do. (And sometimes it takes a while, and some jobs to get to this understanding). It depends how You look at it. :)
But yes, I think I understand what You mean. Am I right when I think that You mean when something very notional happens to us, that makes us “see things clearly for the first time”, or in other words, find our place in life, find the meaning. Was that it?
Hi Liina.L
Thanks for your insight!
Consider this The Buddha…himself was a prine before and looking at the deplorable inequalities he made a decision to relinquish all worldly desires and attain Gyaan/Enlightenment….that was probably the one and only critical place where he RE_INVENTED himself…the decision to give it all up…BANG…path-breaking stuff. I consider those moments are what Paulo is realting to here.
And yes, we differ some of us have those moments and some of us are yet to experience it…but harping back to my point… :), I think career-shifts as mentioned by others here does not really fall under re-inventing in the large abstract sense…maybe that is just re-skilling!
I reinvent myself whenever I feel that “tug” from the Spirit. It’s my sign that I have to do some fixing up with myself.
Since I was five years old, I was reinventing myself… I was hiding a painful life of sexual abuse and family violence, which required a lot of creativity and imagination to show the world a happy child, until my mid thirties is when I found the place and the therapist to unwind all that suffering and start to find the real me in realizing that violence and abuse is something we can overcome but ask for a lot of yourself, again reinventing myself but in a deeper and meaningful way: actions and perseverance in finding happiness. Until today, I believe through love we can achieve anything, and through violence we destroy the good and the beauty in ourselves. (added by Mobile using Mippin)
Shankar Ramachandran: In a way, I see Your point. But in the meaning of the frequency – if, for an example, You have been “emotionally” dead (or in any other way), for most of Your life, and one day, You decide to jump in the river of life, then it is possible to reinvent Yourself frequently – because You haven’t really lived before, You have to rethink certain things and have new experiences which You never even knew about. Each day can be a new adventure.
But I understand why You question it. I can talk from personal experience this time.
Love,
Liina L.
Quite a few times. Because everytime I see trait or way of thinking I have I always see to it that I change it because I want to be better. I need and want to change for the better. When I go home from school, I ride a jeepney( public transportation in the philippines) and the ride I take from the jeepney upto my house is quite far so I get to think and go through all the events that happened through out the day. It’s the time when it’s only me and my thoughts and nobody else can exist. It’s also the time when I get to assess myself- if I had said a hurful thing to anyone, made a joke of someone(even if it is just for laughs and they don’t take it against me) or the way I acted in a certain situation. So I think I reinvent myself very frequently.
ANGELINE
I think in my 26 almost 27 years of life I’ve reinvented mysel twice. I grew up as a shadow of a person, always hiding behind the scenes with a lack my confidence and self-esteem always deteriorating my life. When I was given a responsibility as a student counci vice-president out of the blue in my Church’s Institute of Religion (I was 19) I had to change. It took a long time, but I was more open to people, more talkative, more friendly, less of a shadow more of a person. That’s how I found my husband and moved to the US to marry him. All too soon, the discrimination and lack of understanding from people around me (and my cultural shock) turned me back into a shadow. So it wasn’t until the last couple of months of last year, 2008, when I started working toward a change. My verbal language skills might not be as developed as my written ones, but I’m working in opening myself to others, “grow 2 inches” when speaking to others, to boost my confidence and mind less and less about my esteem issues. I’ve come to be at peace with who I am, eclectic and varied, different, with issues, strengths and weaknesses… now I have to face the world and not let it destroy me.
So you can say I’m currently undergoing a “reinventing myself” face. In the process I’ve found much wisdom and happiness and I hope to find more as the year progresses and as I change toward a better me. :D Love and peace to all!!!!
Almost everyday actually! I often think of things I’m doing or saying to people. Or reflect over my own reactions from people I meet or talking to. Why do I react like that? Could I’ve done differently? I think you have small re-inventions and big re-inventions in life. The small ones come to you every day when you reflect over things around you. The big ones happen only few times in a lifetime, but can have major impacts on your decisions further on.
To me it happened when I went from job to job trying to find a better solution or feel safeness. The new jobs couldn’t give me the wellnes and harmony I was looking for so I had to re-invent myself. I found out that I didn’t like what I was doing at all so I changed direction and focused in only one direction. That did it! It changed my life.
I have a humble counter-point…most of the readers here have commented that they have re-invented continuously…but I do raise a query… is that even possible???
If it so evident and so frequent … then it is not re-invention at all. My view is that re-invention happens when there is thourough and complete shake up on your thought patterns where you ascend from mediocrity to higher planes and you realise that only much after you have done so…NOT during the process itself.
Am I making sense ?
In my experience it’s felt more like “myself was reinvented” than “I reinvented myself.”
EVERY DAY – we adapt with the world.
I came to read today, and not to post. But I am tempted to post again. I am giving up on the temptation this time.
I have mentioned this before, but I will mention it again: we all have different personalities, different knowledge of the world, due to our different experiences and surroundings, views of life etc etc. And I bet most of us, if not to say all, have had our tragedies in life.
I will bring out a foolish example about different views on tragedies:
Picture this – You have just lost a simple pen. (And this is a pen which may or may not be a symbol for You, it may or may not be of any importance to You – see it as You want to see it).
1. Reaction of a person – they will take it as a tragedy and can’t stop worrying and regretting to have lost it, etc etc. In other words they make a big deal of it.
2. Reaction of another person – they will take it lightly – as a joke. They probably make a funny commentary about it or just see it as something that probably had to happen.
3. Reaction of another person – they couldn’t care less. They are numb about it, because it just doesn’t matter to them.
(And probably there are many ways how to react to this situation that at this exact moment I haven’t thought of.)
So – in conclusion – we all have different ways of coping, of having to deal with changes, or things that happen to us, and also with re-invention of Yourself, or seeing the re-invention of others, if You like.
There are many views how to look at re-invention:
*taking it as a proccess of life: we are born, and we grow in a personality, and then someday we will die. We constantly have to change ourselves to adapt.
*taking it from the concious or unconcious aspect: we may change conciously or unciniously. In other words, we re-invent ourselves (having a reason/purpous to do it), our lives, or we let the world re-invent us(going with the flow). We adabt ourselves conciously or unconciously.
*taking it from the matter of readiness: some things we put in the future, some things we keep in the past, and some are the things we can start resolving today. We choose to adapt or we wait for better days.
*mind versus physics: re-invention in the matter of the body and the soul – which are we inventing.
*negative versus positive: sometimes we may change to a different place/state than we were looking for. Or it can symbolise how You think of re-invention (personally I see re-invention as a positive side – an opportunity to change).
etc. etc.
If Paulo meant concious re-invention, then I’d have to say, first we have to see, that there is a reason or a wish for a re-invention. And that step is taken before the re-invention (“the act”) itself.
~*~*~*~
I think we all constantly reinvent ourselves, because, as humans, this is our source of life and coping with the life. We have to do this also, because our views change, we mature… and it’s expected that because of that we would have to do it anyway – to grow in person.
I can say, I am not any different. As all of us, I have had my tragedies in life. Earlier, some of these tragedies have stopped me to live my life, but as I choose differently today, I am able to re-invent myself even more often. If not conciously every day, then at least unconciously…
I think re-invention is a way of adapting. With the world and amongst ourselves.
~*~*~*~
Sorry for not sharing my re-inventions, but as Paul from Austria said – too little time. And I think there are too many to think of. But if to say in one word – my latest re-invention is:
to see all the possibilities for the re-invention(s) for myself, and maybe to others as well…
PS! Where is Thelma ;)
I think I have reinvented myself maybe about half a dozen to a dozen times.
The first when I went from a private school to a primary school , wearing school clothes having new routines, becoming a reader.The second was when I became an older sister feeling a different person because of a sister.
Then 3.Going to secondary school and learning how to conduct myself within certain boundaries with other girls and the opposite sex.How many times does anyoe invent themselves as a teenager?
4.Changing schools because of abuse.I had to start afresh keep my secrets and my loss of face, go to church.
5.Leaving home to live in a bedsit just after I left school, reinventing myself in jobs as I lived in bedsits in other areas.I reinvented myself as a single person.
5 1/2 Learning to live in a new name.Being reinvented as a Mrs.
6.Becoming a mum ,
7 Becoming an inland dweller Living hundreds of miles from my family and the love of the sea. Reinventing myself with learning to love nature in the garden.
8.Slowly reinventing myself as a person who keep diaries and write poems, paint, and to reinvent myself from mum
9.To Granny to becoming a woman who likes her empty nest.
Reinventing myself from pet owner to someone who loves plants.
10.To now invent myself as a listener and a motivator for those who are much loved, who are attempting to build up the foundations of new relationships family and life.
So about ten reinventions if not more.
I am not reading the online chapters of the new book.I am saving it up for the day I buy it.My mother loved one of your books I gave to her with all the small stories and quotes.Best wishes and thanks.
I’m a fan that never writes to you(until this moment) but was always writing when she was feeling her life and character were changing…
This are two moments written and given to you a bit general…
What is life? What is a person? What someone deserves to do until he dies? A PERSON COMES INTO LIFE ALONE AND AGAIN ALONE HE DIES! AS HARD IT IS SOMEONE TO ACCEPT THAT ….UNFORTUNATELY IT IS THE ONLY TRUTH AND AS QUICKLY AS WE ACCEPT IT… THE SOONER WE WILL ENJOY EACH MOMENT COLLECTIVLY WITHOUT SCRUPLES AND GUILTS!!!
HOW MUCH SORRY I AM THAT I’M JUST A SIMPLE PERSON… I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE INTO DOING SOMETHING IMPORTANT BECAUSE I ACCEPT THE DECLINE OF INDIVIDUAL AND HIS TANGIBLE NON-EXISTENCE! …….. My life afterwards from 3 other lives will not mean nothing and I am not going to be reconciled with this idea and whatever else will be given to me in the course as a “delear” …… NO…I WANT GIVE IN – And if I think of all this just upon the youth of my age and because of the so-called feeling “I can do everything!!” then… LET ME STAY FOREVER YOUNG AT HEART AND IDEAS. -
&
Life is a mess…and we are summoned to uncomplicated her without the basic instructions…although it’s our choices witch define our actions and our lives we never find the right path to walk or the right star to follow upon the sky……
It’s in every person depth of soul that he or she can find the inner truth and power of character! All decisions truly lies at every person different will! And there is nothing someone can do to change them if one doesn’t want!!!
In any case and whatever someone might claim (only to rest his troubling thoughts), all of us are looking for the better half…… AREN’T YOU…?
Everyone is on a continuous search to track down their half, as if we were in the early ages, projecting on them either themselves or their opposites in character and past mistakes!!!!
“Hoy es un nuevo dia para empezar de nuevo”
Facundo Cabral
Wow. What a wonderful question. I try to improve myself by and by everyday. At 23, I think I’ve reinvented myself at least 10 times. The major reinventions. They always seem necessary when I’m confronted with a huge challenge. And I’ve always welcomed them. Through trials I’ve been able to overcome physical, emotional, intellectual, social and character limitations.
I’ve had to reinvent myself to become a/an:
gymnast, age 11
science high school scholar, age 13
…a bit humble, age 13-14
survivor of emotional child abuse, age 16
spiritual, rather than a religious person, age 16
self-healer/peer counselor through psychology education, age 17+
activist, age 19
law student, age 21
university/campus politician/public servant, age 21…
(and a major character assessment, age 23)
Когда ты понимаешь что идёшь по жизни с завязанными глазами ,так хочется чтоб хоть кто нибудь помог тебе не упасть в нужный момент взяв за руку.
СПАСИБО ВАМ
Hi Paulo and Everyone,
Much of the re-invention stems from an event in childhood where, with best intentions, a School teacher read one of my English essays out in assembly. I had really let it loose with metaphor and feeling. As a twelve year old boy, I was mortified that such an emotional and expressive {girly} essay was shown to the rest of the boys in school.
I was pretty good at science and not bad at languages. After that science seemed the path of least resistance. The artistic expression was then deeply suppressed until my late thirties.
I was very goal oriented as a younger man striving to be an academic at a top university; which I achieved. I was on a mission. Then I had what was perhaps the most pivotal conversation of my life on that beach in Negril which demonstrated to me that I was living only half a life. I was in effect lying to myself.
Over the next few years, I was clinically depressed. Then I found the Warrior’s Path and I began to recapitulate my life. Slowly I re-emerged to invent and sell new instrumentation to Japanese semiconductor firms. {Think about traveling to Japan on business whilst on anti-anxiety medication.} Then around 2000, together with some friends, I founded a high technology laser company. I was a businessman too.
I met a Toltec nagal and began working with him. I learned that I was a Man of Action and a dreamer by predilection. {Think of Genaro if you have read Castaneda}. And so I found myself quite firmly upon the Warrior’s Path. I left after another point of crisis.
On the 30th August 2003, the night of my birthday, I climbed Mount Sinai in the dark with a young Egyptian guide. I sat there in the cold with many others to watch the dawn of a new year {for me}. I have never seen the like of it since or before. I experienced what can only be termed “the love of God” pouring into my heart; glory in all its manifestation. The photos I took then are the screen saver on all my computers.
I started writing poetry pretty soon after that. And I wrote a lot.
In June 2006 I sent in my resignation letter. Resigning from a secure and well paid job at university to start a personal development business with perhaps three months work lined up.
I knew that the letter would irrevocably change my life. I had six months notice to work out. It was madness to everyone but me.
I sold my flat and moved here to the shire to a place where I knew no-one. When 2007 started and I no longer had a job I was so far into the unknown, that it was handy to keep a spare pair of trousers close. Academics can suffer from Pavlovian conditioning, the tyranny of the timetable. What would I do with all those empty spaces?
After working so very hard for so long I now had time. In that time some basal cell carcinomas popped up and were excised. I injured my cervical spine doing Judo and was forced to heal myself rather than letting them loose with a knife near my spinal column. This, in a strange way, changed my whole state of awareness. Each day I lifted weights to regain the movement and strength in my left arm. Believing that it would get better; it did. I moved from 0.5 to 20 kilos in a few months.
Then last May I had an encounter with the Ally. {Not to be recommended} This made me re-evaluate my entire existence and what I thought I knew. That week, I passed out in a meeting, temporarily lost my drivers licence and I bought a bike. Subsequently I had loads of MRI scans etc. They did not find anything. I wrote a book in the months that followed. I was drawn back to Paulo’s books and started writing here in October.
I got married and went on honeymoon to Vienna. When they asked me for my profession at the registry office, I said writer and boy did that feel good!!!
I guess re-invention is the stepwise manifestation of a process of transformation that continues {hopefully} all through life. That re-invention is still work in progress. I am pretty sure that those that knew me as an arrogant and pushy young academic would not recognise me now.
Each morning I do Raja Yoga and open the heart centre. I can even chant like a Tibetan for short periods of times. I was drawn to this by following a dream pointing towards the books of Alice Bailey. Somehow this feels right for now. I wonder where it is all going and relax; because I know that my dreamer is guiding this thing, the dreamed of which “I” am a part.
With all my very best wishes,
Alan
mon cher paulo
permettez moi de vous répondre en français
vous savez tout juste après avoir lu votre message, mon boss est venu me voir pour dénigrer mon travail. cependant je ne me suis pas laisser faire car j’ai foi en mes capacités ainsi qu’en mon professionnalisme.
je me suis tellement défendu qu’il a préféré abréger la discussion.
vous savez dans cette entreprise je passe plutôt pour quelqu’un de trop poli, timide à la limite. mais beaucoup ce sont étonnés en me voyant tenir tète à leur bosse qui n’en fait qu’à la sienne et que personne n’ose contredire. et pourtant je n’ai pas pour autant changer, mais c’était un moyen de leur montrer mon vrai caractère pour qu’ils sachent que je ne me laisse pas faire.
bon bref ce que j’aimerai dire c’est que ce n’est pas forcément un changement qui s’opère mais que l’individu face à une nouvelle situation puise généralement dans ses ressources insoupçonnées(qui je pense sont en chacun de nous) s’il a vraiment foi en lui et qu’il tient vraiment à passer le cap.
c’est comme une sorte d’évolution à un niveau supérieur et une fois le premier niveau dépassé on ne peut plus s’arrêter et ne demande qu’à opérer des changements positifs dans notre vie car on sait que maintenant on en est capable.
excusez ma loquacité et je suis vraiment comblé de pouvoir parler à un légende vivant comme vous!
mes respects!
Meu amor,
Lá vem vc com as suas alfinetadas, essa aí eu adorei e resolvi postar aqui as minhas reinvenções.
Eu estou constantemente reinventando a minha vida , este é o meu desafio diário.Desde outubro de 2008 , quando voltei de uma temporada européia de trabalho estressante, que decidi mudar meus hábitos de vida.
Em primeiro lugar resolvi elevar minha auto-estima que estava no nível zero, comecei em melhorar minha forma física, gostar de ver minha imagem refletida no espelho. Identificar mais as minhas qualidades e não só os meus defeitos, aprender com as experiências passadas,tratar-me com respeito, amor e carinho, optar pela reeducação alimentar e exercícios físicos, ouvir a voz da intuição, acreditar que mereço ser amada, e fazer todo dia algo que me deixe feliz, pode ser coisas bem simples como dançar,escutar música, ler mais, estar bem informada, estudar um novo idioma, estar na companhia da minha família e de meus amigos, e também as mais complexas como tocar tamborim (estou aprendendo e não perco uma aula). Resumindo: Aproveitar cada minuto que Deus me dá neste planeta que escolhi para viver e conviver com pessoas maravilhosas e tão especiais como vc, que considero um presente DIVINO.
Muitos beijos e muitas saudades, Te amo muito,muito,muito…
Sua leitora assídua e fiel escudeira,
Marcia Nascimento
After I read The Alchemist, I have started to listen my heart and try to follow her paths.
Ms.Paulo you helped a lot.
Thank you
Gostaria de ter mais criatividade para me reinventar, ou mais ousadia… não tenho certeza. O fato é que a humanidade está sempre se reinventando a partir de reinvenções individuais que não são percebidas… e talvez esse seja o meu caso no momento, hehehehe.
Das vezes que me reinventei:
* quando percebi que era a mais ingenua das meninas do colégio e sempre era deixada para trás – Passei e arriscar mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando percebi que era a última a ser escolhida pelos meninos na escola – Passei a escolher mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando não gostava mais da faculdade que cursava e gostava do garoto com quem namorava – Casei e passei a ser dona de casa, pensando que tinha certeza;
* quando fiquei grávida – Passei a ser MÃE mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando o encanto do casamento acabou e eu voltei para a casa dos meus pais – Passei a ser uma pessoa sem grana, sem casa, com uma filha – voltei mesmo sem ter certeza;
E a principal lição que tirei desses casos mais evidentes de reinvenção – numa vida bem comum – é que quando eu não tinha certeza, e mesmo assim fazia, foram os momentos que passei a ter alegria com minhas escolhas.
O mesmo, porém, não posso afirmar quanto as certezas – às vezes são escolhas felizes, às vezes não, hehehehehe.
Tenho a impressão, também, que as reinvenções mais celebradas são aquelas que trazem sucesso profissional, mais dinheiro, reconhecimento público… e nestes casos não me reinveitei ainda…
e já tenho 30 anos!!!! :-O
Beijo, amo vc!!!
Gostaria de ter mais criatividade para me reinventar, ou mais ousadia… não tenho certeza. O fato é que a humanidade está sempre se reinventando a partir de reinvenções individuais que não são percebidas… e talvez esse seja o meu caso no momento, hehehehe.
Das vezes que me reinventei:
* quando percebi que era a mais ingenua das meninas do colégio e sempre era deixada para trás – Passei e arriscar mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando percebi que era a última a ser escolhida pelos meninos na escola – Passei a escolher mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando não gostava mais da faculdade que cursava e gostava do garoto com quem namorava – Casei e passei a ser dona de casa, pensando que tinha certeza;
* quando fiquei grávida – Passei a ser MÃE mesmo sem ter certeza;
* quando o encanto do casamento acabou e eu voltei para a casa dos meus pais – Passei a ser uma pessoa sem grana, sem casa, com uma filha – voltei mesmo sem ter certeza;
E a principal lição que tirei desses casos mais evidentes de reinvenção – numa vida bem comum – é que quando eu não tinha certeza, e mesmo assim fazia, foram os momentos que passei a ter alegria com minhas escolhas.
O mesmo, porém, não posso afirmar quanto as certezas – às vezes são escolhas felizes, às vezes não, hehehehehe.
Tenho a impressão, também, que as reinvenções mais celebradas são aquelas que trazem sucesso profissional, mais dinheiro, reconhecimento público… e nestes casos não me reinveitei ainda…
e já tenho 30 anos!!!! :-O
Beijo, amo vc!!!
Hello,
Every time I was abused in some way, instead of spreading away my shy face, I was forced to bring myself to a new life: new people, new house, …and maybe others friends.
But the great difference had no count: I’ve changed my look, my attitude.
I’ve always tried to not revenge against my abusers…To let them go down by themselves…
After all that, I tried also to let may hair grow, to be more feminine, so- more powerfull,
good luck,
Lili
Dear bloggers,
Tamim:I am not wise but I say follow your heart, the feeling wont go away!
Sheela: Your story touched me because a similar thing is happening to me, I had a dream that brought me back to Brida and reading it with new eyes…the meaning of the Dark Night and having the courage to take ‘the leap’ into the unknown. Like so many of the other bloggers I feel this constant niggly feeling that just does not allow me to live a ‘normal’ life. This, I think, is what calls for re-invention at certain points in life…to follow your calling in life you must be prepared to change and move.
I admire the courage of people who dare to live life according to their intuition and inner guidance. I believe by making mistakes and through re-invention we fine-tune our personal radars to bring us more closely in line with our own unique purpose.
In some ways I feel the best things that have happened in my life have been when my whole world has been left in ruins and all I could see was destruction – it is within this that I have emerged anew, never losing sight of that glimmer of hope (or light).
I think we all have chapters or cycles in our lives from which we learn and change, but re-invention takes courage and is the backbone of a survivor/warrior/fighter. If you choose to live your life off the beaten track then I guess we must expect a bumpy ride:)
I’m so grateful to be reading this blog – who knew so many interesting people are out there!?
Christian: Never be sorry to share your story – there is always someone to benefit :)
Hi,
I think that as I read in a book ( La théorie des cordes by JC Somosa) , we are changing every seconds I mean physically and spiritually, it’s a slow process but when you take a long period you see it more clearly; I was different at 20 than now.
I would say it’s not reinventing oneself, it’s just growing as nature.
Love
Hi dear paulo ,
thanx for your interesting question .
hmmmm … too many times , this happend to me that i had to and try to reinvent myself . too many times …
on times, i feel i am not the person i want and like to be .
on times i feel something is wrong in my life .
and i am satisfied for these reinventing … :)
I think I found myself during traweling, actually I found out that I am not that shy girl which has fear…..but I still didn´t find what I want to do. I hope I will recognize it.
Paulo if I haven’t reivented myself I would not be here today. I believe that everybody is reinventing theirself from time to time.If you are not able to reinvent yourself, you are not going to change, you are not going to improve your life and yourself! you know what? I love my life, and I’m glad to be able to reinvent myself, I’m glad to the good and bad experiences in my life;)
Continually. Every time, I change my job, meet new friends, change clothes. It may be something literal and something metaphorical. As in alchemist, it really happens when you make some contact with the spirit of the universe in a way that only you and the universe know. Then you know that you are changed, you are reinvented. It maybe a once in a lifetime experience, depending on how deeply you connect and how often you connect.
To tell you the truth, i’m about to reinvent myself right now!
And it’ll probably have some cataclysmic effects.
I’ve been struggling for 8 years, and now i want to let go of so many broken hopes, and a life that was never mine, to pursue my childhood dream!
I am so confused, and i really wish that i had someone to hear out the whole story, someone wise.
I think that the answer lies within me, I just hope i can shut down the noise, false optimism, unjustified pessimism, and external influences.
This will probably be the first time i try to reinvent myself.
Mr. Coelho, or anyone here, here’s a question :
Would you give up the orthodox and predictable life to pursue something you love, despite the unknown outcome, the possibility of failure, and the dismay of family and friends?
Hi Paulo,
I don’t think I have ever stopped reinventing myself.
I know sometimes it is more obvious than others.
I guess the major reinvention of myself was when I became a mother. I was 20, not really knowing who I was. Now I am 34, and though I feel more me than ever, I still don’t see the same person when I look in the mirror everyday.
Great question!
Hi Paulo..
BasicallyI don’t think you’ll like me saying this, but I don’t exactly agree with the part of ‘reinventing’. I don’t quite agree with ‘reinventing’.
What you and the others say about re-inventing is, that due to a certain circumstance in your life, you have undergone, or forced yourself to undergo some changes in life. I don’t quite agree. I feel, among the thousands of permutations and combinations which our brain makes, our mind [Mind, I believe, is the mix of both, the heart and the brain] chooses one and only one for action.
And then, we carry forward that specific action or emotion. When we come to a dead end on this road, we find that something has been wrong. At this juncture, our mind goes back to the remaining 999 choices, and comfortably bars the original one. This is what, you people call reinventing.
I feel that this reinvention, as you put it forth, is made each and every second. For every time you think, you gropple through those left choices, as well as create new ones.
These very choices are your own brainchild. YOU have made them, and you have constructed them. It’s just about rethinking about what works and what doesn’t.
I didn’t quite like The Alchemist. I don’t want to much comment on that one here.
Christian, I felt really sorry to read that one. I want to tell you, that somewhere on the back on universe, I’m there to pray for you. Trust me, you’ll be happy. There shall be love, and there shall be light. And all shall be happy.. Just mark my words !
And in the end, a question popped into my mind. Dont we ‘reinvent’[as you say] for selfish motives? Is it not because we want to be happier..? and when we undertake any action, is not somebody else going to suffer?
Think About That.
Luv and Luck
Regards
Ojas Gohad
Hello Paulo,
Re-inventing yourself is a proces and a lot of work in my opinion. I did it a couple of times I quess. 1st. when I was a teenager and took a turn from becoming an artist & writer to being a preacher. This took a couple of years, effort etc. and I did. During my marriage I found out I still was an artist & writer, an decided to go for it anyway. Doing so, my marriage collapsed, and turned my worldview upside down, and again I had to find new ways of living and loving. The last two processes are still going on. But I find that each time, you get closer to yourself, and doing so…to others.
Thanks for the question..it’s interesting
Greetz from the Netherlands,
Frida
I have reinvented myself on many occasions, I believe it has been to get to know myself.
The first time that I am aware of was when I joind a baptist kind of church and married father of my children. Then I had to do it again 10 years later in order to get back to who I really am. I left my husband and lived alone, only seeing my kids on weekends for about 4 years. Then I tried marriage one more time, only to find out that I couldn’t be myself in that marriage either.
Now I am in the process of reinventing myself again, in order to become the person I want to be, thinking about how I want to spend my life as meaningful as possible.
My children are leaving home, I will become a grandmother in the summer.
I am moving to a smaller place, I’ve stopped smoking and using alcohol, I excersize and i’ve decided to live on my own at least for a long, long while. At the age of 44 I am getting to know myself at least a little bit and trying not to play a role to please others.
Oh quite a few times. I first did it when I was about 10. I was fed up with the way people treated me. I was too nice and let everybody run over me. What do you want in a family with nothing but strong characters? The second time was about ten years later, when a friend told me my character was too strong… Now I wish I’d never listened to that friend, because now, twenty years later, I had to start over again… Still a strong character, but still too nice. I’ll never get anywhere like this. Working on it.
At this very moment I am thinking about decisions that would reinvent myself, these decisions have to do with career and love. Both types of love, a partners love and love for my career. I could either follow my heart to where that person is, but I do not see any benefits to my career in that future, as in the other hand I could stay where I am, where I DO see myself with that career, environment and type of city that my career would be successful in, but that would mean losing the person that I love.
It seams that the smartest thing to do is do what’s best for my future, what I most likely decide to do, that would mean reinventing myself on recent decisions I’ve made with my partner.
It would not only change my future but also his…
“Re-inventing yourself.” What a powerful and interesting thing to consider. I turned sixty-five last November, 2008, and I have witnessed the evidence of time and experience leave their indelible marks like stamps in a passport, marking the territories I have traversed and known. I think that we re-invent ourselves every time we understand something that we never understood before. Sometimes that understanding comes in the form of an idea and sometimes it comes in the form of a physical condition. And sometimes both things occur in unison. For example, we fall in love with someone first because the idea that we have of them matches our physical experience of that person. It feels true. Falling in love leads to many complex challenges. It asks us to expand ourselves and our world view to allow for a more complete picture within our minds and hearts of what it is to be human. I have fallen in love more than once in my life, and every time it has caused me to re-think, and to re-invent myself.
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