Paulo Coelho's Blog
The cup of suffering is not the same size for everyone.
(The Manual of the Warrior of Light)
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el mayor dolor que sentí en mi vida fue hace casi dos años. La traición de lo que pensaba era una amiga.Ver que estaba haciendo lo posible para hundirte cuando por delante aparentaba que era una amiga. fue sentir una traición como nunca sentí en mi vida. a partir de ahí, ese dolor tan grande impidió que soportase otros dolores como las enfermedades familiares, lo que me llevó a un abismo emocional.ahora sé lo que te cura de algo así es el perdón. yo ya la perdoné porque me di cuenta que no era capaz a hacerlo y que sólo le deseaba lo peor. ahora ya no lo veo así; pienso que es muy triste ser así, y que eso es ya una cruz. me liberó el amor y el perdón, aunque lo pagué muy caro. un precio demasiado alto por la culpa de su avaricia y su maldad. pero la maldad igual que la bondad están a nuestro alrededor, pero ahí arriba está Dios y a el no se le puede engañar. desde aquí mi perdón a toda esa gente que me hizo daño embaucadas por las palabras falsas de un ser demoníaco. al final es verdad que la fuerza del mal es muy grande pero la de Dios es siempre superior.
Un guerrier de la lumière jamais lâche – avant même que les forces sont plus élevés. La fuite peut être un excellent art de la défense, mais ne peut jamais être utilisé lorsque la crainte est grande. Dans le doute, le guerrier préfère faire face à la défaite et guérir tes blessures -, parce qu’il sait que, si terme, sera de donner son attaquant un pouvoir plus grand que celui qu’il mérite.
Il sait qui puisse guérir la physique, mais il sera toujours persécutés à cause de leur faiblesse spirituelle. Ainsi, malgré quelques moments difficiles et douloureux, le guerrier voit l’inconvénient avec héroïsme et de courage.
Gandhi a dit: «J’ai été forcé de choisir entre l’affrontement et de la lâcheté, n’hésitez pas à décider de la lutte.”
Un guerrier de la lumière aussi.
Um guerreiro da luz nunca se acovarda – mesmo estando diante de forças superiores. A fuga pode ser uma excelente arte de defesa, mas nunca pode ser usada quando o medo é muito grande. Na dúvida, o guerreiro prefere enfrentar a derrota e depois curar suas feridas – porque sabe que, se fugir, estará dando ao seu agressor um poder maior do que ele merece.
Ele sabe que pode curar o sofrimento físico, mas será eternamente perseguido por sua fraqueza espiritual. Então, mesmo diante de alguns momentos difíceis e dolorosos, o guerreiro encara a situação desvantajosa com heroísmo e coragem.
Diz Gandhi: “se eu fosse forçado a escolher entre o enfrentamento e a covardia, não hesitaria em decidir pelo enfrentamento”.
Um guerreiro da luz também.
A warrior of light never craven – even before forces are higher. The leak can be an excellent art of defense, but can never be used when the fear is great. In doubt, the warrior prefers to face the defeat and then heal your wounds – because he knows that, if run, will be giving his attacker a greater power than he deserves.
He knows who can heal the physical, but will be eternally persecuted for their spiritual weakness. So, despite some difficult and painful moments, the warrior sees the disadvantage with heroism and courage.
Says Gandhi: “I was forced to choose between confrontation and cowardice, do not hesitate to decide the fight.”
A warrior of light too.
The cup of suffering is not the same size for everyone. (The Manual of the Warrior of Light)-Quote of today…
My cup of suffering- is the same as yours.You can imagine mine -but not be able to feel it. I can only imagine yours. I suspect however that the pain of loss of a loved one is the same for you- as it is for me-unbearable. Some can express their grief, so we can measure their cup. For those who cannot express their pain- the temptation maybe to assume that their pain is less?I suspect it may be greater.
it is strange sometimes that ‘normal’ life asssumes us to all live as if our cups were equally full…
when in pain, the worst thing some stranger can say is this: “cheer up love, it can’t be that bad”
… and in response, through your unbearable pain you want to tell the person to go away ;o)
no one can ever know how much your pain is; nor quantify it..
and similarly: no one can expect healing to take equal lengths or measures to full recovery.
sometimes healing and pain are so consuming, in subject and in duration because of the meaning attached, or the lesson required to go through.
I wish everyone who has suffering, to drink slowly of the cup… and take plenty of time to satisfy the thirst, to not feel rushed or driven to drink of the cup beyond their capacities.
The cup of suffering is not the same size for everyone… neither is our destiny and our perception or our sensitivity!
The cup of suffering, but of happiness too, is so ..big as we ..deserve it!
We pay for our past ‘wrong doings’, evil thoughts and acts.. If we realize it and feel it deeply into our heart, then it is the moment for ..changing our FUTURE. To learn how to ‘project’ beneficial thoughts and vibrations of LOVE. To become Love and Light. Just as Jesus Christ has drank his cap for our Liberty from the prison of material life and pain.
A ton avis celui qui se montre “plus faible” dans une situation est forcement celui qui appris plus de coups??
O tamanho do sofrimento não é o mesmo pra todos, ou a forma com que cada pessoa reage ao sofrimento, ou a dificuldade é que é diferente?
“Deus da o frio, conforme o corbetô”
NO NO NO its not the same size for everyone- each of us has his own PAQUETE of life, some is bigger and some is nicer- and some is sadder etc
but we all know that we should learn to mannege our own basket- and i believe once we learn to accept- we can mannege our basket in a better way-
and i have learnd to remove some un needed items from my basket- and i know that it helps me carry it on and on and on!!! some of the items dont help me and they r just OUT!!!!
lots of love
Last year a tornado was going around my house.
Sitting under the kitchen sink, listening this enormous and noisy thing and praying, me and my house get untouched.My house was surrounded by broken trees,which were completly torned out and it seems completly irreal, what happened.After crying a lot, being shocked,working a lot, more and more I felt thankfulness and also shame. It not seemed enough to say thank you god for protecting me.
But my body is keeping on with anxiousness by strong wind….
So what I want to say, and this tornado also can be an accident,or a much bigger cup of suffering. Is the real cup of suffering not to get rid of former hurtful experiences and not being able to bring back all parts of our human being in here and now?
hia chaps !!
ever wondered, why pain exists !!
why dear merciful god in his infinite compassion created pain.
please do reflect.
if one can corelate exitance of pain with HIS mercy and love, one may escape suffering, as savita too seems to have said !
PS : It is the times of pain endured without breaking down which trigger our greatest advancements !
Women suffer more than men, giving birth and taking care of children.
I am grateful for my cup of suffering. I understood many things I did not not before. I am also grateful for my cup of enjoyment, because I tasted my cup of suffering. Some have it full, others almost empty, but for the latter ones, we don’t know how intense each one of the droplets is.
The type and amount of suffering stands in relation to
- the reward, the mercy & the calling in life*
“The cup of suffering is not the same size for everyone.”(The Manual of the Warrior of Light)- Getting “drunk” or “thirsty” means replacement of your cup for somebody’s.
Savita I see your point about pain. I feel guilt when I am unsympathetic about other people’s pain. I really wonder to myself about them just over-reacting.
My parents told me time and again “you are going to live.” I got hit by a pickup truck as a child and I heard “you are going to live.” What my parents were doing was telling me to ignore the pain. During childbirth I was the quiet mother who opted for no pain relief. Albeit my silent tears, I felt like I could go on without it. I wonder if ignoring pain or teaching this method is a good thing or bad. It is to learn to deny one’s true feelings. To numb oneself. Or is it realizing that you can endure much more than you think you can? This is something I have yet to decide.
‘The cup of suffering is not the same for everyone’-some people experience mental illness that robs them of their brillant career,and sometimes relationships-and others people experience tradagedy -of loss of loved ones. Seeking suport and learning coping mechanism can help-some people are strong and do overcome suffering.Some families pass down dysfunction through the genertions-all it takes is a few enlightened and strong individuals to break the chains that bind.
I am lucky .to be living in a peaceful country and not in a war zone.
In English we have this term “threshold of pain.” How high is a person’s individual “threshold of pain”? We ask this question as though the pain itself (whether physical suffering or mental anguish) could actually be measured. So what DO we measure instead – we measure the screams, the outcries, the pleas for mercy and relief. And what if a person does not cry out? What if they do not scream? What if they simply suffer in silence? – We say they have a “high threshold of pain.” So what do we do? – We tighten the thumbscrews just a little more, we crank the rack just a little tighter, we drive in a few more nails. And why not? They obviously don’t feel it anyway!
I have thought about this a lot in life because it is something that frustrates a little. Some people, when they are ill or injured, they moan and they groan – “Someone help me! Oh, please won’t someone help me?!” And so help comes – they get a nursemaid who sits by their bed all day and wipes the sweat of the fever from their forehead, who brings them tall glasses filled with cool drinks, who urges them back to health and happiness. And when tragedy strikes, these same sorts of individuals fling themselves on the floor and they weep and they wail, “Oh, poor me! The torment! The suffering – it is unbearable!” And so everyone rushes to their side and picks them up and dusts them off and holds them and hugs them and reassures them that everything is going to be alright, sits by their side and wipes their tears until laughter returns to their eyes.
And this frustration that I feel in reference to this phenomenon is probably due to some major flaw on my part. I haven’t figured out if it is something inherited (something genetic), or something learned (like a skill), but my threshold of pain is seemingly quite high. I am glad for this, in one sense – very thankful for it, actually – and yet it also causes a sort of resentment that I would rather not feel – a resentment toward those to do elicit mercy in crying out at the slightest twinge of pain. I am the one sitting there bleeding to death and five feet away from me is someone who has a tiny thorn in their finger, and yet they are the one being rushed away to the hospital emergency room on a stretcher, with an IV hanging out of their arm! And it isn’t that I’m “trying to be strong,” it isn’t that I am “too proud” to cry out – it’s just that, if I do cry out, I feel ridiculous, because I know that I CAN bear more. I know that I have not, in fact, reached the limit of what I can endure, and so calling out for mercy and relief seems ludicrous, it seems like I’m lying, feels like I’m trying to make my pain and suffering seem greater than it truly is, simply in order to get attention. i just can’t so it. (Furthermore, crying out and railing against it, only makes the pain worse – a point which I will investigate further in a moment.)
So, when I am in great pain, either physical or mental, or otherwise, I just push through it and move on. And if the pain is so great that I cannot move on, then I just sit with it – acknowledge it and let myself feel it completely, even move toward and into it deeply – until it subsides and releases its grip on me. Then I move on.
This is the funny thing about pain, about suffering in any form: I find it to be very akin to a supposedly “vicious dog.” I own a few dogs myself; most of these are of what might be termed as “vicious breeds.” The thing I have learned in dealing with dogs, however,is this: if a vicious dog approaches you growling and/or barking, with teeth bared, apparently ready to attack, the one thing you should never do (which most of us already know) is run. Whatever you do, do not turn your back on that dog. But, if you want to subdue it (providing that it is not a trained attack dog) there is one further trick that often works: turn toward the dog (and you mustn’t smell of fear when you do this – the adrenaline must not be rushing through your body), and in the calmest and most genuine voice that you can muster, CALL THE DOG TO COME TOWARD YOU. Say, “Here, boy! Come on!” Pat your thigh, or hold out your hand. In a semi-crouched and non-threatening posture, take a step or two toward the dog, as though you meant to catch it. Most dogs, even huge dogs with a mouthful of teeth, will back off and skirt away from you. They may not cease barking completely, but they will not attack. Many dogs, upon beholding this gesture, will actually tuck their tails between their legs and run. They realize that you have no fear of them, and they don’t really want a fight – they just want you to go away.
Pain is like this. Whether physical or mental, if you shrink from it or turn your back and try to run away from it, it will attack with all out viciousness. It will rip you to shreds if it can. But, if you turn toward and move into it, press your whole self in toward it, embrace it fully and feel it completely, it will subside. You will become one with it. And, in the moment that you become one with it, it will lose its grip on you – its power over you will be nullified. The pain may still be there, but it will be a neutral rather than a negative sensation, and in that, there will be no suffering.
Just as you may reach out your hand and feel the fabric of the chair in which you are sitting, or in the same way that you may feel the coolness of a glass of water held in your hands – pain can be transformed into just another sensation, neither “good” nor particularly “bad” – just neutral. But the only way to evoke that transformation, is to move toward the pain, not away from it.
Pain is inevitable. We will all encounter some sort of pain in our lives. But suffering, on the other hand, is not an inevitable fact of life. It is a choice that we make – an option that we select.
Nice answer,Kasia.I think is not same size because we cant bear same weight on our shoulders…And Mighty God tries our strengths only in the amount we can bear it.We are often unaware of how much we can bear, but when the moment arrives,maybe we find out we are stronger than we ever imagined.Still,I agree nobody is willing to suffer,or to see others suffering.When happens to watch movies where Jesus Christ is whipped or tortured, I just cant watch the scenes.I cry a lot,and wonder how could people do that .More,if I think people did that to the Son of God,what should I expect from them?I know there are good persons,but the scenes just turn me up-side down.
I wish the cup of suffering was the same for everyone – empty.
I am a psychologist working on Panic Attack Disorder in Romania and I would like to stage a 8 to 10 minute short play based on Mari’s panic attack in Veronika decides to die.
This short moment will be filmed and put on a website with information about the prevention and cure of PAD.
Would I be needing approval for copyright issues in ordert to use those paragraphs?
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