There is a small book here, in French called “Nasty Stories about Great Men”.
Of course we all have nasty stories that we wish no one to hear, but sooner or later, they will surface.
That’s why I permitted the publishing of my biography that’s not yet in English but is in Portuguese and Spanish.
So – you cannot hide – and what would you say to your children that you don’t dare to say now? What will they discover after you die?
I invite you to share this in the blog – either anonymously or with your real name. This way we can see that our vices are not that bad and that we are not the only ones with these flaws.
We can then see these defaults as qualities because we survived. We are warriors of light that even against all odds are able to follow our paths without surrendering to guilt.
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Truth:
Pedro – thank you.. you are so right!
Alexandra – yesterday I wanted to nearly write how beautiful your soul’s “light” is; today I add courage to this.
Blessings to you both xxxx
first of all there are no sins …these are ideas fed to us by men who were less evolved than our selves and who considered that god is a thing whose right and wrong are the same as ours.do u think this is true…do u think the divine is so shallow that he will judge us according to what we have done….i believe mistakes cannot be done knowingly.so if a people knew what absolute right and wrong were then would ne one make a mistake?would ne one try to offend god and is there is such a thing then would he condemn his children to an eternity of pain??if he is all forgiving and all knowing then he knows that religion is a fraud and that everything happens not for a reason but to understand a reason….in this endless loop of right and wrong,the only explanation that satisfies is that we stop0 looking at things as these two extremities rether think of everything as shades of grey and and the will to choose to shade of which side of grey u want to be is up to u….(thats the 1 gift and or curse that is laid upon humanity-FREE WILL)
so many happy people with their happiness intact writing about some thing that they dont even believe in.the fact remains that confession has nothing to do with guilt(after ur dead i.e.)
so confession for our grand children is a joke to me…
ne how how many of these people do u believe mr coelho have really confessed their darkest secrets???do u believe that any one would share such secrets in public like this….i think u need better ideas…by the way enjoy cannes!
I agree with you,dear Heart. Also because I was once very near to such a dead, when I was very young. I cant hide the thing, so everybody know that, or at least people who come closer. Were very hard times, I was naive and weak. But I am the only one to know what was in my soul, what pains I passed. Not only the body might hurt. But people often forget that thing. Well, is not the only secret.Anyways, more or less, because I am open and sincere, everybody know my life. I think if I would have a child, at the right moment I will tell him about me. Also, as Deedee, I was raped, and I was virgin in the moment. When my parents come to know, they beat me , saying I am a shame for the family, and that the neighbors will laugh on them. So, instead of being near me, they were adding to my pain. I swear I will be not like that, if I will have kid.
“The root of anguish is the doorway to transcendence…” or something like that…
I am a man that is chronically self-centered, obsessed with needing something outside myself to make a difference in my life, to make me feel better, to validate my existence, to provide comfort and ease the pain. I live subject to compulsive patterns of thinking, feeling, of behavior. These are all deeply ingrained within me due to my nature and upbringing in a dysfunctional household.
I have done many things that were illegal, immoral, and sins against God and my fellow man, but I acted like I had good reasons to, good alibis, plenty of justifications and rationalizations.
I suspect that people may have died in my wake, children aborted. I have cheated, lied and stolen. But most of all, I have cheated myself in not realizing any of God’s gifts within me.
However, I have found a way to become free in the moment and it does involve facing my history, finding the root of each anguish, surrendering to my part in each thing and letting it go. It is a process within a relationship of trust in a very specific setting. It may be a process of ‘recapitulation’, priestly confessional, or a moral inventory, but there somehow needs to be a way for each of us to relieve ourselves of the rigid constraints of our past that conditions what we see and how we see it in the present.
I am afraid that a public declaration is not necessarily efficacious as it contributes to unnecessary drama and ego aggrandizement. But I believe we do need to confide in a trusted someone as well as before God.
2 holy men approached a river by which a woman was waiting. She asked them to carry her across and the older man took her upon his shoulders, crossed the stream and let her down on the other side.
The 2 holy men continued down the road until, finally, the younger burst out, “You should not have done that, carry that woman across the river! You know our holy order does not permit us to even touch a woman!!!”
The older looked at him and said, “I only carried her across the river, but you have been carrying her ever since.”
So, too, with our past, no? It says somewhere that God forgives us our sins and then tosses them into the sea and forgets them. We must seek and find our own freedom from those same burdens.
I have always been ashamed to say the things I truly feel from my previous partner. I was ashamed to admit that i did not like how he acted towards my friends, that i want to be free from the shadow casted by our relationship, that my heart was unsure about the future..
i was ashamed to admit that the love i thought would make us through every storm would eventually fade, deep inside i regret that i have veiled the truth from him. i just waited until he did something wrong to me, which triggered the break up of the relationship, i wanted for the world to see that i was not the bad person that he was the bad one for hurting me..
but looking back now, i should’ve told him early on, so that it didn’t end up with me having guilt.
i want forgiveness for not telling the truth.
i felt i betrayed the very essence of love, i pray to be forgiven someday.
i do not want to leave the world knowing that i was not truthful to him and to myself.
If one day i will be face to face with the Creator and He will ask if I have loved truthfully, I am scared to give Him the answer, but will try my very best to make Him understand what I did, i did to save myself and that it was the best way i knew how to live.
I know He will understand, because He ALWAYS does, God never judges he understands.
I like to be an open book because all of it ~ the good and the bad ~ is part of my story. And your story. We’re all just human after all. And when I’m prepared to share those tender bits of myself, there is a facade which gives way and others often feel free to reveal secrets about themselves. Secrets which, until they were shared, seemed shameful and degrading but which, once aired, are really just part of the human experience.
The funny thing about being this way is that people often think you’re hiding something. Seems willingness to be free from mystery simply creates an illusion of more!
Bueno como acto vergonzoso no lo creo, pero si tuviera que revelar uno seria cuando perdi mi virginidad con una prostituta o mejor dicho una acompañante. Era muy joven,llegue al orgasmo muy rapido y al principio me dio verguenza pero aquella mujer solo me dijo que eso era normal en la primera vez y que no tenia porque avergnzarme, que poco a poco aprenderia a controlar mi ansiedad, fue una gran maestra. Tampoco me averguenza que alla perdido mi virginidad con una escort, aunque muchos piensan en esta sociedad que es algo malo o vergonzoso. Mas alla de ser una prostituta aquella mujer es una hermosas persona por dentro y por fuera, y hoy en dia es unas de mis mejores amigas (aun es acompañante).
When I see you I’ll tell you all about it. ;)
Il s’appelle comment le bouquin en francais?
There is something promising about the title ‘Nasty stories about Great men’. No matter what we go through in life, we can become great human beings! I am not going to pour out any of my darkest family’s secrets, or any life lies I might be living, but I will tell you of one of the most nasty moments in my life, where I faced a question about if I have any amount of personal responsibility for a mans death?
We stood in front of his coffin. The lid was open, and for the first time in my life I looked at a dead body of a man who had been very dear to me. We had been told he died from brain aneurysm. The second I saw the corpus, I knew…he did not die a natural death, he must have killed himself. The handsome looking man, for your imagination, he looked a bit like Elvis Presley in his good years. Here he was …his head and body looked swollen, the color of his face was green, and as the eyes must have popped out, and had been sowed with big stitches. Nasty. Shocking. Probably the worst I have seen in my life.
This devout Catholic, he always wore a big gold crucifix, his dad had given him. Why did he commit suicide? Who is responsible?
The Catholic Church of course first of all blame the man himself. They refused to bury him for his ‘sinful act’, so the funeral took place in a very small chapel, with very few people attending. His ex wife was there. She had left him two years earlier, as she first moved in with a lesbian girlfriend, then ended up living with a man who was beating her half to death. His dad was there. An old man, who cried and cried and cried during the entire ceremony. The dead man, had in the past, told me his father had done very bad things to him, but they now put all that behind them. So who are to blame, when a person cannot stand to stay among us anymore?
The dead man called me two days before he died and asked me to meet him for lunch. I was in my car on my way to a client, and as I never chancel on clients, I told him, I wasn’t able to make it this day. He said; ‘If you don’t meet me, I will never call you again’. I got a bit annoyed at this ‘threat’, but it never, never dawned up on me, that this man was suicidal. Looking back, his face had a depressive look about it, but I never really thought about it, as he always appeared strong. However…this is not my fault, I cannot but feel a certain guilt, that I didn’t see him for lunch that Monday. Could he have been alive today if I did?
Two months earlier, the man had been put on ‘Administrative leave’, and the work place had some horrible accusations against him. They were false accusations, but the dead man was so insulted he chose to quit his job. Was the people who accused him falsely, responsible for his death? To be unemployed certainly can drive a man to do desperate things.
We looked at his three lovely children, who now will grow up without their daddy. His ten year old daughter talked by the coffin and said ‘We would have liked you to stay with us’. What is wrong with our society, when so many young people chose to hurt themselves? Are we all to blame? In memory of this lovely soul who passed much too early, God bless his soul, I just want to say; I don’t blame the man himself at all. Only complete desperation can make anybody do this to themselves. It’s no sin to feel that desperate. The church authorities should be ashamed of denying anybody to be buried in sacred ground. But for my own ignorance too, I do ask forgiveness.
when i used to drink. i would buy whiskey instead of food for my child. i dont drink now . i still havent told the child yet . time will be in Gods timeing.
There is no shameful act.
We live our lives naked before God
He sees all
He understands all
He forgives all
The past is gone
The future belongs only to love
I did not listen to myself. He was my first boyfriend. I was 20, and we had been seeing each other for almost 3 years, and he wanted to get married right then.What I wanted was to be married around 30. Slowly over those three years of being ‘together’ he showed such unkindness to others that my earlier delight in him was being replaced by feelings of repugnance, but I put my hand over my eyes and did not look at what I knew. I acquiesced to what he wanted. It hurt him. It was a waste of time. I told him I would stay with him, but he was unhappy and left. I am free, but I might be sitting here typing having chained myself to someone who didn’t want out, and that, my friend, would be a hell.
Also, I did not realize that I am acceptable, even if unusual, to others, so I was not comfortable being myself and being around others if I did not know they already loved me. It was a waste.
Somos imperfeitos. Sentimos vergonha da nossa imperfeição. Quando erramos temos medo de sofrer com o julgamento de quem amamos. Então escondemos certas coisas, bobagens até, para não decepcionar, para não magoar. Mas seguimos em frente. Porque buscamos não necessariamente a perfeição, mas o que justifique os nossos passos. Que justifique a nossa busca. Certos ou não.
Esconder de quem amamos o que nos envergonha, priva-os de nos conhecer como realmente somos, de nos aceitar e nos amar como realmente somos. Mas só saberemos se continuaremos a ser amados se tentarmos lhes contar. Acho que deveria valer a pena tentar. Desde que se tenha consciencia dos riscos a correr.
“The secrets we take to the grave are sexual in nature.” Edgar Lee Masters, Spoon River Anthology.
I’m paraphrasing, but you get the idea.
I don’t think my kids would be surprised at learning – if they don’t know already – that I celebrate my (past) sexual experience. I wish I had a youtube of my memories.
Revelation, not discretion, is our pop goddess and public mea culpas and apologias are so in vogue, and yet so tiresome.
What shames me more is revealing fear and vulnerability. Don’t care who knows it when I’m dead, it’s the here and now of it that’s more frightening.
i had sex with my former supervisor(im seeing him right now)
i kiss a randon guy at the pool party
he doesnt know this
I was sexually abused as a child, and I can’t remember. I’m still somewhat ashamed, but more scared than anything. Not many people know.
I saw my daughters horoscope some years ago. I would have to learn to be honest by her, it said.
i am quite honest, – but to my daughter….
Would she not feel an outsider, more that she does already?
I want her to have a choice, want her to be able to choose a perfectly normal life without knowing how vulnerable normality and is, – or maybe guess at it without knowing.
Some years ago I told her,‘I was lesbian once,’ that was after she met Esme, my one time wife for n 5 years, something as perfectly common as loving a woman has become ground zero: when she manages that she’ll be able to handle more, if not, then I will protect her of who else her mother is beside her mother and daddy’s ex wife. She talked about me being lesbian once in class, has already felt what it is like to have a different opinion than her classmates.
I told how many people find it hard to accept life in it’s fullness, told her how some things one does are called shameful and how that is just a word and need not be a feeling.
I’m proud of what I’ve seen and experienced. It’s not been super fluent. I am woman who has done everything a woman could do with her life, I have been a feminist, read tarot cards and fixed herb medicines, I have been a student and a follower, have learned about art and architecture, trained to be a teacher and a mediator, a communication advisor and a project manager, I have been a slut and a whore, a wife and a lover; have had lease cars and lived in squats, loved married man, abusive man, smart men, sportsmen, ugly fat bold men and lean handsome men, and I have loved woman, and now I am still only halfway, I know I would not have wanted to miss a thing. I know that it is all about love and taking what is offered, giving what’s there to give and how that will all be all right eventually.
But I also know that particularly the whoring and the submission part is hard to communicate. You can only grasp it when you open your heart and understand something not quite individual, more like something universal that one can touch when one melts into it, forgets about oneself and connect to something else, something woman can be and always has been.
Does that make sense? Not something to be explained in a few sentences anyway.
Should one stay quiet or should one talk?
And when?
Will it make ones children’s life’s harder, or give them an advantage?
Is it by chance that I have the daughter I have or is it a divine intervention and might my experience mixed with hers add something important to our world?
I just don’t have a clue and I have learned one thing, none of us has… we’re all just pretending to know about shame and pride.
It’s strange isn’t it?
my day today was about listening to a friends confessions but in trying to make her feel better i did some confessing of my own.
Most of us do awful things at some point in our lives,sometimes to other people but mostly i think to ourselves, at the end of the day we have to go to sleep and wake up by ourselves and hope that in between we have found some peace.
Today when i was confessing the things that i am so ashamed about i knew that i had only truly hurt myself. I know that i don’t want to do that to myself anymore, i have to grow up! ME, I, i’m my worst enemy, i want the people that i love and that love me to be proud of me, i don’t want any skeletons in my closet.
But sometimes it’s not about the big scary things, sometimes it’s about letting someone know that they have hurt you, or their actions cause you pain. Sometimes telling someone how you feel and how they have made you feel is the hardest confession of all.
hi.several people betrayed me in life and it caused me pain,terrible pain.Betrayal changed me,but i tried not to change my concepts.Recently,i myself betrayed someone close to me because he hurt me so i took revenge in the same way others did to me.i’m so ashamed of this.
I stick with Eros – I respect mystery. I neither want to shone a lamp on my bed nor will I shone on other beds. I like to show trust and wanted to be trusted. I am not interested in revealing “nasty” stories for everybody in internet. It is not that I am ashamed – I reconciled with my life and I dare to say everything about me to the ones that have to know it – they will find nothing shocking or new when I will be dead. (I have already asked myself exactly this question.)
I have nothing to hide and I am a open minded character, but I am also not exhibitionistical – I have no fun to strip in public.
“We can then see these defaults as qualities because we survived.”
I love it!!!
:)
Meu amor, meu respeito e minha gratidão,
Ca
I`ve been hiding my suffering
Only Christ knows
It has caused a deepth in me
people find hard to understand
Sometimes I`m shameful for
not being able to live
“on the surface” -
but even more ashamed of my self
for not SHARING my hole range
of experiences in life
Guess it`s about time now*
you got it all wrong… check with Niko!
the funny thing is, all the things I’M ashamed of are not the same things as other people are ashamed of – the shame belongs only to me.
my unrevealed shameful stories are also the darknesses that give texture and colour to my life, which would otherwise be nothing but pure white light, and then what would my purpose be?
however, revealing our shameful stories is always the path to healing: the revelations close up loops of unfinished business, and that is what opens the door to new experiences (instead of repeating the old ones again)
so, I’m all for it. not that it’s easy or anything
peace
I think that would be nice to do that. Maybe, writing here the “things”, one will feel better, easier.
One thing I don’t do is lie to my children. However, I don’t think that they, or anyone else for that matter, needs to know every little thing about me. Sometimes it is none of anyone else’s business.
We are all human and make mistakes. We don’t always make the best decisions in life. Does that mean we have to share all of that about ourselves? I am not so sure that we do. If we are living in the present moment, the past is not so important. It is how we behave with others in the present that is important, especially if we have learned from our mistakes. And if not, then we suffer the consequences of our actions.
I am ok about sharing information about my past when the situation warrants it. It also depends on who I am sharing it with and the motivation behind the person that wants to know.
I am not one for making confessions as I don’t have anything to confess. People do things in their lives because it may be the right thing to do at the time. It is only in hindsight that we might see things differently, but that may be because we may have more information than we did at the time we made our decision.
It is when people try to hide aspects of their lives, especially if they are in the public eye, when things can get tricky. If people are being hypocritical, then certainly they may get exposed.
Yes, I have done some things I may not be proud of, but it isn’t anybody else’s business.
Paulo, if you want to share, then go right ahead. The choice is certainly yours.
Hey, nobody wrote . Why? I have such a long list, that I am afraid you will sleep while reading, in case you dont faint for the shock…I did some wrong things in my life…But now I am almost a saint…lol.All this seam so funny. Maybe during the week I write my ” wrong deeds”.
I have done something which I feel shameful about and this comes at just the right time, my shame is ripe. I told my best friend about a secret of a friend, and somehow, the friend is thinking something, suspecting something and has started acting different, not talking to me, ignoring my calls, being paranoid. I feel shame because I don’t want to hurt my friend or do damage. Just the suspicion for the friend must not be good, and i feel i am to blame. but i accept this situation and what must happen will happen. what I must learn i hope i will learned.
Uma minha foi quando eu era 3 ano do ensino médio e tinhamos uma brincadeira de futucar o ouvido do outro para deixa-lo arrepiado. Certa vez numa aula de historia com um dos professores mais metidos da escola, eu fui futucar o ouvido de um colega meu quando ele estava fazendo uma pergunta para o professor. Ele me escrachou na sala e não me veio uma palavra em mente para confrontar com ele. Eu apenas aceietei tudo e assumi o meu erro. Mas isso não foi o suficiente para ele e ele saiu da sala. Uns colegas me advertiram para eu ir pedir desculpas a ele e eu fui e fiz. Ele não queria mais deixar eu assistir aulas dele, mas acabou me desculpando. Até hoje quando algum ex-colega meu lembra do caso diz ter sentido pena de mim.
Sinceramente,
at this moment, I cannot think of any acts that I feel shameful about.
One thing I remember though, is I used to feel very ashamed to masturbate when I was younger. Thought I needed it and would do it, I felt ashamed and thought that i might be doing something wrong, and was very uncomfortable while i did it. Now that I’m a bit older, I realize how absurd it was the way I felt. And that there is no shame in it. It’s such a natural thing.
Thank you for the confessional!
Oeeehh… the nasty stuff :)
I’ll have to think about it… and see how bad it is what I come up with… maybe use a fake name for once :)
On the other hand: I can still live with myself very peacefully, so how bad can it be?!
Love
Hey Mestre,
Acho que em Revealing Shameful Acts eu ja cumpri mto bem minha parte com vc… ;)
MARG,
Ca
My most shameful acts would probably be related to my attitude in high school. I look back now, after having only a few years outside of it, and feel incredibly silly and embarrassed. I was so arrogant, thought I knew everything and possibly worst of all, thought I deserved to have everything. I took a lot for granted and likely drove away a lot of friends. It was a bad place to be but it took stepping away into the “real world”, so to speak, for me to hit a wall and realize that I really knew nothing. That realization hit me hard, and tripped me up, but I’m so glad I learned it so that I can work on overcoming that attitude.
I’m okay with all of that being revealed to my family, friends, or anyone else, as long as they know too how hard I’ve been working on it. Plus I’m not sure that their opinion, if expressed, would even affect me given that I have already spent way too much time bogged down with discouragement and dismay, and have since moved on to seeking true wisdom.
Ist der gute Ruf erst ruiniert,
lebt’s sich gänzlich ungeniert.
(Wilhelm Busch)
Is your good reputation once ruined,
you can live totally unabashed.
Okay, this is really hard but I do have something very shameful that I will never ever tell to anyone nor my future family. It all happened about a year ago and it still bleeds whenever I think about it.
I was deeply in love with someone for almost 3 years. I lost my virginity to this man willingly because I thought I have found the one that I shall marry. We were so much in love. Eventually we decided to live together. All seemed so well for us. We planned to get married in within a year time after we move in together.
However, one night we were so drunk, we didn’t take precaution having sex freely. I got pregnant and realised it instantly when I didn’t get my period. I told him on new year 2008. He was happy at first, then he said he’s not ready to have the baby. He asked me to abort it! I was very angry because the child was conceived out of love and I was beginning to feel the changes on my body, I love every moment of it. It felt surreal. I love the life inside of me.
He insisted me to abort it. Threatening me that he won’t want a bastard and he will hate me forever if I had it. Even when I said, I will have it alone without him. He still said he will hate me forever. I love him so much. He promised to marry me and give me another baby the right way next time.With heavy heart and tears, I gave in to his wish. I aborted my pregnancy of one and a half month.
After the abortion, he mistreated me. He seemed to be distanced away from me. At one time, we had a fight and he slapped and kicked me so hard. I was numbed like a stupid person. I just let him hit me again and again… The next morning, he said he can’t marry me now that he had hit me. He accused me of turning him into a monster. He wanted me to let him go.
And he went off, away from my life just like that. I realised at the end, that he never wanted to marry me. It’s just a lie. He just want an easy way out. The hurt and damage that he has done me scarred me forever. I can never tell this story out of shame even to my own family. Nobody knows this thing and I shall never ever tell it to a single soul in my future relationship.
It’s the lesson that I need to live for the rest of my life and I am really ashamed of myself. Even writing this story is scaring me. I asked God for forgiveness to all my sins.
(Querida amiga mulher) Você me comoveu com a história da sua vida,deste momento triste q vc enfrentou (momento difícil e delicado).Como nós mulheres nos deichamos ser enganadas dessa forma
quand amamos um homem,quando nos entregamos a ele de coração,corpo e alma?!me pergunto isso as vezes,pq nós esquecemos de nós mesma em nome desse amor,em nome do outro;nos anulamos,esquecemos nossos sonhos,desejos …acordamos no meio de uma loucura ou de um ato de covardia da parte deles(bicho homem),nos prometem mentiras,nos usam
as vezes como objeto do seu próprio prazer …e quando querem mudam
de mulher na maior naturalidade achando isso normal e natural .
Querida fiquei triste por vc pq esse estrago q ele fez acho q nunca vai cicatrizar em vc,mas por outro lado vc escapou de um homem cruel
um ser desprezível e egoista,ficou livre deste traste.Siga em frente
com sua vida e tenho certeza que vc encontrará um amor de verdade em
sua vida( tenha fé e esperança ).
Com carinho um grande abraço.
Débora.
Dear abused soul,
i share a similar story in my life. may be more or maybe less painful than you. but God did send me an angel who now loves me madly and accepts me for watever i am. im blessed and you will also be.
love
megha
“La verite de demain se nourrit par l’erreur d’hier,”
A de Saint-Exupery
Nasty things that we have done? There have been several. All have come out to a certain degree. Most of the secretive involve sexual acts and thoughts about sexual acts. They came to a head two years ago. I divorced my wife around that time. However, both my ex-wife and I are still living together…it has made us more open about who we are. It has been a time of cleansing and still continues.
The truth about oneself is relative to our point of perspective at the time we speak. What is true today…in 5 to 10 years will be untrue based on how we have re-defined the event. So nasty things or vices are relative in this regard. The best thing we can do is decide/choose to view them as ‘qualities’ that move us towards LIGHT.
Thanks Paulo,
Ramiro
Paulo, um episódio da minha vida que me deixou muito constrangida foi uma vez em que, uma juíza me pediu para fazer um laudo técnico e quando o enviei para ela, coloquei a palavra meretíssima no lugar de meritíssima.Ela me chamou até seu gabinete e me explicou que meretíssima se referia a meretriz!! Fiquei muito envergonhada e nunca mais esqueçi disso.Agora, quanto à sua biografia, quem ama voce e o que voce escreve não vai se importar com certos trechos!!
What a big curious smile you have! :))
I need to think…to my past life…so…past!
Paul,
I just wrote a post on my own blog called “Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic” that has the same theme as your post above. The point is we are all in the same game, struggling as human beings with our imperfections. Just because my imperfection is different from yours doesn’t make me superior to you or you superior to me. Anyone who’s interested can read the full post at:
http://happinessinthisworld.com
Alex
NO TENGO LA CULPA! :-D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9r3ul-EMS-I
“Tout peut se reprendre et fondre en Dieu, meme les fautes.
P. Teilhard de Chardin
Shame is a cancer of the Soul. We all carry something. For me, I have been ashamed all my life that I was not good enough, that if people got to know me properly, they would reject me. My mother was quite certain that I was not good enough, pretty enough, talented enough. To make it worse, I’m asthmatic. The general view when I was growing up was that asthma was a psychosomatic condition. I used to pray to God to ‘make me good’, and give me the ‘mind over matter’ that would end my illness. To this day, I still feel it. Few people would know this, but I always feel that I’m less than I should be, and that shames me. I tend to keep people at a distance because of this – they generally assume I’m confident and independent……
Bein voilà,j’attend!
Shameful things to confess?No,not really,I can sleep at night at least,myself.Talking to people isn’t a crime,so I have nothing to put under a strong word as “shameful”.Unless,I wasn’t aware of it or someone else has been saying lies behind my back,or use my name to do crap ect..so I couldn’t know and therefore not being responsable.
The only really “shameful” episode of my life,(but then again there is nothing to me to be ashamed,it’s more the “person” who did that to me who should be ashamed),it’s when I got raped.But I already said it out loud,so it’s done.No I don’t see otherwise,anyone?
Olá Paulo, bom dia!
Bom.. tópico delicado e polêmico o que voce levantou.
É claro que existem graus e níveis de “defeitos”. Uma coisa é uma pessoa cometer um crime, algo brutal e extremamente rude e grosseiro e outra coisa alguém cometer algo, que apesar de também não ser aceitável, não ter esse nível de grosseria. Eu vou pensar na questão, anotar em um diário o que eu puder pensar, e caso eu faça sucesso eu revelo ao público, que nem voce fez. A minha pergunta é: Voce publicaria sua biografia (que eu já comprei, porém não li ainda) se não fosse um Fenomeno de Sucesso?
Abraços grandes!
At the age of 48 I guess there are maybe as much as 2 hours of my life I wouldn’t like to be on the internet. The rest of my life is OK with the normal ups and downs and some silly doings and people. But all in all I guess I could stand the internet test. I was a sunday school child, my father was a teacher and later prinicipal at the local primary school in a small village. My parents were total abstainers. With a background like that you just don’t become a wild thing. Sorry if I disappoint you…
Wow. You were smiling,but I laugh here a lot. One need much courage for that . I will think a bit, but guess I will write undercover…Will see if I gather courage. See you, I die to read others comment. I come back later.Love
Alexandra
Hi Paulo and all,
I have something that I have held within me since I was a young child which I have felt guilty about and perhaps you can help me release it. I have always been a bubbly sort of person but I have never had that many friends. When I was at primary school there were children who used to say that there were my friend but they were not. They would tell me lies and make me look a fool. I have always been a bit childlike and trusting. Well we had one boy at our school who wasn’t bad but kept getting into trouble. Anyway he was just messing around as usual and one of the girls told me to go and tell a teacher, which I did. The next thing the boy is bought in front of the head and was given corporal punishmemt. I felt really bad from that day to this that i got him into trouble and that he suffered because of me. From then on a I tried not to follow the crowd. Thank you for letting me talk about this because I have been carrying it around for such a long time and it has made me feel terrible, but i feel better now for telling you.
Thank you.
Love
TL
I would say that talking about and revealing one’s shameful acts is never to be one where it stems from a sense of needing to confess…
perhaps i like to have resolved my wrongs before allowing myself to be judged by others..
but there is one thing for sure that i would be sad to know my grandchildren would hear… and so endeavour to work on with heart and soul..
and rather than expose this barely.. the words of this song ring true..
“Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there is hatred let me bring your love;
Where there is injury your pardon, Lord;
And where there’s doubt true faith in you.
Oh, Master grant that I may never seek
So much to be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love with all my soul.
Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there’s despair in life let me bring hope;
Where there is darkness, only light;
And where there’s sadness, ever joy.
Make me a channel of your peace.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
In giving to all men that we receive;
And in dying that we’re born to eternal life.”
if i failed in these in my life, then this would indeed be a most shameful act for revealing to my grandchildren
;o)
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