Fear is a powerful tool. Society uses it to scare us about everything, and to keep us on the track. Family uses it to force to follow their dreams, not our dreams. It took me a long way and I paid a very high price to follow my dream. I’m wondering what to think about Fear, why do people try to instigate this fear in eveybody? And the best option is that, in your opinion, we have, to not respect this unnatural fear and move forward towards our dream.
Thank you,
Paulo
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I admire and respect Steven.He must wear a helmet due to his unpredictable epilepsy.Despite the obstacles,he deleted fear and purchased a round-trip airline ticket,Miami to San Francisco.It was a very special occasion…his sisters wedding.Standing ovation for Steven’s valor.
On Fear:
“Do not judge your neighbor until you’ve walked two moons in his moccasins.”
_ Cheyenne Wisdom*
“No pido estar libre del temor,sino tener el valor de enfrentarlo.No pido el fin de mi sufrimiento,sino corazon suficiente para abrazarlo”.
_Tagore
“I’m not asking to be free from fear,but to have the courage of facing it.I’m not asking to end of my suffering,but heart enough to embrace it.”
Among the various traditional Mexican proverbs:
“Everyone can be a master of their own fear”…Does not necessarily apply to everyone.It is my humble opinion there are two types of this undesirable crippling emotion…Irrational and rational.
This devout religious man needs someone to talk to so he seeks advice from a priest.The priest inquires…”What is troubling you my friend?”His reply was:”It’s in the New Testament,printed on two different books:Mark 9:14-29 & Luke 9:38-43″.”I’ve lived with this uncertain predicament for twenty-nine years.”_A friends advice was:”You must learn to accept it as that is your lot in life.”After a while this so called long distance virtual ‘friend’,deleted and blocked him from her life.”_”It deprives and restricts me of my freedom.”_”I feel I’m only flying with one wing.”The priest provided him with some peace of mind and reminded him that he would be there for him.”(Cont…)<3
Fear is a very powerful emotion it is primeval. I have experienced fear as falling into a void. Into a crack in a pavement into an all seeing eye this has been just before I have had a seizure. Pushed out of my body.Fear is a very controlling force a cruel force. You just have to surrender to it and its power deminishes
Fear is an important indication:
– You may remain where you are or
- you decide to face up to your fears and than pass the next examination.
You feel great when you face up to your fears and make the next step, then the next step…
fear is like a risks in business that you must overcome and be optimize. A challenge that must be faced by you to reach your desires in earthly limits. it is by lack of faith to oneself that has not been in your realization in your life to tackle with.
fear is a nice opportunity to recognise which things we hv to improve ourselve
sometimes we give up our dreams just because of the fear of failing. Every one has his own fears but it differs when you let your fear control you and change your destiny. the one who is always afraid of something, will probably not do anything.
As far as society, associates, employers (generalising) Fear as a motivator is used to control obviously, but what is it exactly, but a reflection of the fear present in the controlling entity ? If you do this, it will reflect like this on me. If you ‘fail’ in my eyes, I have failed in others. Interestingly, it is probable that most of us are not aware of the fear cycles that we are all too involved and wrapped up in. We have been involved and immersed in them from close to birth, and have learned that is the method for survival. It takes great intuition and courage to break out of those cycles. Amongst the biggest Hero’s in my life are those who have seen that what they have always been exposed to is not right, and fought against it, perhaps not even knowing why. In a lot of cases, Fear is likely to be used for the right reasons, for Love even, or for a local or a specifically personal interpretation of Love, a local learned, and conditioned understanding of it. In that treatment, there is no choice to repress others with fear, it is the only way known. Other definitions of Love are not available. Free choice is perhaps a very rare gift, as it would indicate a complete open and accepting unconditioned state to avoid prejudiced opinions or pre-judgements. It is easy to blame or criticise others for their methods of fear controlling, but perhaps it is better to respect that they have come from somewhere unknown to us, that they are likely to have little choice in their style of people communications, and to Love them regardless. But still move on our own path, despite their criticism, however harsh, and whatever the cost.I like the entry in the Blog today talking about leaving behind the “jerk’ of youth, but taking the experience with us to reflect, and learn from if not today, but some time in the future.
un lindo consejo que deberiamos seguir y que nos ayuda a darnos cuenta si estamos por el camino correcto es verdad desde pequeños la sociedad tiende a imponer miedos por tal co cual situaciòn para que camines como necesitan nuestros padres que lo hagamos talvez para evitarnos sufrimientos pero ya cuando estamos maduros creo que no debe existir impedimento alguno para alcanzar nuestro sueños gracias por llevarnos hacia la claridad paulo
Is fear not simply our negative learned reactions to what we have gained through all of our experiences as a participent here? Are children born with fear of monsters? How could they be until they are informed about the concept ? It hadn’t existed before. It was created, and re-created, and re-created by learned behaviour and experiences over much ‘time’, clock time that is. Our fear is realted to the experiences of the past, and of the potential experiences of the future based on what we learned in the past. Do either actually exist, or is what matters only this exact moment of experience, of all encompassing emotion, balancing in Joy, of the collective beauty of the exact present moment; which actually never ends.
fear is lack of faith in yourself, others and God. basically it’s you affirming that you are unable to handle what will come your way
Fear is something we have to protect us from danger and warns us to be careful when we attempt to deceive. Fear is blind and it is us that gives it sight because we are unsure of ourselves. Fear can either be a friend or it can be a foe. It waits patiently for us to extend our hand or hide behind our insecurities. The choice is ours.
Growing up, I always feared that: i will not have a job, will not have a wife, i wont be rich…eiesh
I used to fear a lot of things when I was younger, like ghosts,threats,making mistakes,disobeying my parents,getting low scores,and hurting other people.Now that I’m a grown up,thanks to my past experiences,aside from the fear of committing a crime,I fear nothing.I also watched Mel Gibson’s movie “Apocalypto” and there was where I was truly inspired that “Fear is a sickness.”I watched it thrice because I love the line when the father said,”My son,fear is a sickness.”I guess the son was able to overcome danger because of this.Sometimes,the more we dare, the braver we become.
I know Fear quite well, and I’m fed up of her company. I want to get rid of her, I had early experiences that created this state of anxious fear in my life, but I’m getting better definetely.I have to as fear is what is preventing me of being in full form
I hope God will forgive me as I believe it is also lack of Faith and it is not right.
Lots of love to all of you
Chanel
Chanel…I too am tired of fear as a companion…stifling the very things that mean most to me,because I’m scared of looking a fool.Scared of rejection,scared of my own powerful emotions,scared of the unknown…..so instead I’ve insulted and walked away from the one person who means most…because of fear….pathetic really……it seemed the safest thing to do,but actually it’s torture!
mil veces me he preguntado por que tengo miedo, mil veces me he contestado que ya me he demostrado que soy capaz de seguir adelante, superando todo lo que me paraliza por el miedo, y aun asi, siempre hay una mil una.
Fear is real, but I think the illusion is that fear is a bad thing. I think fear is what you feel when you’re on the cusp of acting on an epiphany. If you have faith in evolution and move toward your fear, you grow and experience little joyful epiphanies after. If not, you don’t grow, and that’s okay too. It takes time to build that faith.
I believe that people instigate their fear on others because “misery loves company”. Cowardly people are never happy and somewhere deep withing they know they are being cowards and they are ashamed. And naturally, when one feels weak, they try to wound those around them too. Feint hearted people don’t like those who shine brightly and believe, for they make too big of a contrast. By the side of one who pursuits their dreams and takes from life bravely, a coward seems even more cowardly.
yo he tenido miedo? jajajajjaja la verdad si, siempre el miedoo a que algo salga mal , mi falta de confianza, miedo en la secuela a esto a aqello, el miedo a FRACASAR yo creo que es el miedo universal de todos los seres humanos si fracsas todo sale mal te desanimas mas pierdes el interes el motivo de las cosas pero y el miedoo? sigue? si es un sentimiento de algo desagrdable que sabemos que nos pone en peligro de algo malo pero asi tenemos que seguir si no intentamos las cosas por miedo nunca vamos a saber la verdad de nosotros mismos sobre que tan capaces somos de atrevernos a hacer algo, ahora en la sociedad el miedo abunda en las calles , las guerras, en tu propia casa pero es momento de que todos tengamos impetu y no nos dejemos vencer por le miedo
PENSANDO EN EL MIEDO TODA MI NIÑEZ TUVE MIEDO.. NO SOY AJENA A ESTE BENDITO FANTASMA QUE NOS GENERAN LOS ¨MAYORES¨ ES TERRIBLE. CON DECIRLE ME HACIA PIS ENCIMA.. POR MIEDO ABRIR LOS OJOS DE HABLAR FUERTE PEDIRLE A MI MAMA QUE DORMÍA EN SU HABITACIÓN.. MAMA QUIERO IR AL BAÑO. TODO OSCURO… ME DABA MIEDO SENTARME EN LA CAMA Y QUE ALGUIEN DEBAJO DE MI CAMA SALIERA Y ME TOMARA DE LOS PIES…SABEN POR QUE???? PORQUE NOS ASUSTABAN CON EL POMBERITO… (EN SANTO TOME CORRIENTES ARGENTINA)QUE A LA HORA DE LA SIESTA DEBÍAS DORMIR PORQUE O SINO SE TE APARECÍA….ETC ETC.. EL LOBIZON EL HOMBRE QUE SE CONVERTÍA EN LOBO,,,, Y VA QUE A LA NOCHE POBRES PERROS AULLABAN.. Y MI CABEZA ERA UN CINE EN 3D.. TERRIBLE. DESPUÉS DE LOS LUGARES ASOMBRADOS Y QUE EN MI CASA EN CORRIENTES PASABAN COSAS INCLUSO UN DÍA SENTADOS EN FAMILIA ESCUCHAMOS..EL SONIDO DE ALGUIEN SIRVIÉNDOSE AGUA A UN VASO.. CLARITO TODOS LO ESCUCHAMOS Y NADIE ERA… Y ESO ALIMENTO MAS A MI TERRIBLE MIEDO Y SIN AYUDA .. PARA ESO ME DESPERTABA A LA NOCHE CON GANAS DE IR AL BAÑO PERO NO QUERÍA NI ABRIR LOS OJOS.. ASÍ QUE TRATABA DE AGUANTAR PERO ERA IMPOSIBLE ME INVADÍA UN SUEÑO DE QUE IBA AL BAÑO ME SENTABA Y DISFRUTABA DE ORINAR EN EL BAÑO… HUBIESE SIDO LINDO SI FUERA REALIDAD.. LUEGO ME DESPERTABA TODA MOJADA.. Y ME VOLVÍA A DORMIR A UN COSTADITO… QUE FEO Y TRISTE… Y DESPUÉS DE TODOS LAS BURLAS.. EL RECHAZO POR SER LA MEONA DE LA FAMILIA… Y ERA UNA NIÑA!!!!!!!!!!!! POR ESO DIGO PREFIERO QUE EL RETO A UN NIÑO SEA UN TIRON DE OREJA POR DAR UN EJEMPLO… Y NO USAR EL MIEDO.. FANTASMAS CREENCIAS Y TODAS LAS PAVADAS QUE NOS DECÍAN CUANDO NIÑA,,, Y EL MAL QUE ME HACÍAN Y EN VEZ DE AYUDARME,, SE REÍAN SE BURLABAN,,, ME PRIVABAN DE IR DE VACACIONES A CASAS DE TÍOS FAMILIARES ¡¡¡POR MI PROBLEMA!!!
¿ DÍGANME SI ERA MI PROBLEMA? ESTUVE HASTA LOS 11 AÑOS EN SANTO TOME CORRIENTES.. LUEGO NOS VINIMOS A VIVIR A GENERAL PICO LA PAMPA.. ME LLEVO UN TIEMPO.. PERO SE ME FUE PASANDO EL MIEDO ESTÁBAMOS EN OTRA LOCALIDAD NO SE HABLABAN DE ESAS CREENCIAS DEL NORTE ARGENTINO. Y ASÍ SOLA FUI SALIENDO DE ESO.. SIN AYUDA DE NADIE… VENIRME A LA PAMPA ME CAMBIO LA VIDA.. DEJE DE HACERME ENCIMA.. FUI SUPERANDO EL MIEDO..
DESPUÉS Y POR ULTIMO NOS INSTALAMOS EN INTENDENTE ALVEAR LA PAMPA ARGENTINA.. DONDE PASE MI ADOLESCENCIA MUY LINDA EN UNA QUINTA..Y MI VIDA FUE OTRA… PERO TODO SOLA.. Y EL MIEDO LO TUVE Y LO SENTÍ CUANDO VOLVÍ A MI PUEBLO NATAL A LOS 17 AÑOS,EN SANTO TOME… ENTRE A MI CASA DE LA INFANCIA Y SENTÍ UNA DESCOMPOSTURA UN FRÍO UNA SENSACIÓN HORRIBLE. Y DE AHÍ DIJE NUNCA MAS VUELVO ACÁ ESPERO NO TENER QUE VOLVER POR NADA DEL MUNDO…ESPERO NO HABERLOS ABURRIDO.. SALUDOS A TODOS LOS SEGUIDORES DEL SEÑOR PAULO.. Y PREFIERO UN TIRÓN DE OREJA SE TE OLVIDA RÁPIDO QUE NO ESTO QUE ME HICIERON A MI..HOY TENGO 27 AÑOS UN HIJO DE UN AÑITO.VIVO EN PAREJA Y SOY MUY FELIZ.. GRACIAS A DIOS…
Dear Paulo,
What is the difference between fear and reservation? What can we examin inside outselves to draw a distinction between being afraid to follow a path and intuition telling us to not walk a particular path?
I applied for a job, and didn’t get it, but the company offered me an alternative position. This is a position I would never have sought out myself and not sure I would actually enjoy. But everyone around me says I would be made not to accept this challenge. I have a feeling of uneasiness about this position, and I am not sure if it is fear or something telling me to not walk that path.
Can you please help me look for ways to identify the difference?
With peace and love Cal
SI BIEN TENGO MIEDO ENTONCES EXISTO, Y ESA SENSACIÓN NO ME SEPARA DE LA REALIDAD, MAS PREPARO EL CAMINO A RESOLVER MIS TEMORES PERO SOBRE TODO MIS DUDAS QUE SON LAS QUE ME PROVOCAN EL TEMOR.
Si bien el miedo es la razón por la que la especie a sobrevivido, (los venezolanos,damos fe de ello), es a su vez paradojico que el miedo nos puede paralizar hasta morir.
Entonces Mr. Coelho? la solucion es eliminar la causa para poder alcanzar el equilibrio y esa ansiada paz que todos buscamos…
Fear… it has been a constant suffering as well as blessing for me. I had to see, suffer and overcome all the things that I was once feared of, that now make me to wonder, if my fear has made those things to come real or it was just a intution without a reason that seeds the fear for those things in me, though all of these things seems not to be in my control anyway.
You ask: “I’m wondering what to think about Fear, why do people try to instigate this fear in eveybody? ”
Recently there was an article on yahoo about a woman with a brain injury that prevents her from having fear. You can wave a gun at her, have a tarantula creep over her arm: shey may not like it but it doesn’t raise her heart rate, she doesn’t break a sweat.
I was startled by what scientists said: IT’S A WONDER SHE’S STILL ALIVE.
Because even if we don’t pay attention, we make decisions all the time – where to cross the street, when it is safe to drink the very hot coffe without burning your tongue, not smiking in the hay, etc.
Seen from this perspective?
What is this alchemy that suddely boosts our heart rate and liberates adrenalin, to allow us to go from 0 to 100 in a plit second, and run away at full speed even if we were drowsy, asleep?
In this perspective, biochemical fear is a GODSEND to all creatures, to allow them to ESCAPE DANGER before it gets them.
There is an use to fear. Fear is not irrelevant.
As usual, it would be absurd to throw the baby out with the bathwater.
Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Fear is a double edged sword. Like a hand, lije a mouth, like a thinking, like sex, it has one positive side and a bad one.
“It cuts both ways.”
Also, fear may be the raw material we inherited from our prehistoric ancestors, but now it gets distorted into anxiety, general stress, neurosis, whatnot… ou wrote that better than pretty much anyone already.
NOW. ABOUT SHARING ONE’S VISION OF WHAT SHOULD BE GOOD AND WHAT SHOULD BE AVOIDED, ESPECIALLY SHARING IT WITH THE ONE WE TRULY LOVE:
There’s a saying in France:
“Experience is a lamp we carry in the back that only casts light upon the path we’ve traveled so far”
“L’expérience n’éclaire que le chemin parcouru”/”L’expérience est une lampe qu’on porte dans le dos et qui n’éclaire que le chemin parcouru”:
If mister X had dreams in his youth about, say, becoming a rock star, and the universe said NO, and he suffered for it (whether it was his true calling or not, whether he really tried or not), and ended up nowhere, and was finally saved when he got a steady job as a responsible clerk… his heart and soul will suffer when the son he loves embarks on the same journey. He loves him and wants to HELP.
Like you, Paulo, give us advice, counsel. You do not want us to stray from the rhythm of our hearts, from our Journey. You do not want usto waste life, precious life, on useless stuff.
Perhaps because you did climb the mountain that you tried to conquer, and now you’re on top of the world – the quest for the LIGHT turned out to feed your soul and your belly, at the same time. You don’t have to worry about what to do with your life anymore, worry about how to make ends meet and have something to eat, or worry that you have found no higher meaning in life when you get up in the morning.
Now let’s imagine a mister B. He had a calling to be a rockstar, like mister X above. And it turned out mister B is pretty good at playing instruments, he has a voice people like, he writes catchy lyrics easily… and he turned up at the right time at the right place whith the right people. It was his true dream, his true calling, and he made it all the way to the top when he wanted to rock n’roll.
So he has a son. His message? “GO FOR IT LITTLE DUDE!!!”
He cannot conceive of a better destiny than swimming in the sound, in the crowds, in deep heavy lyrics that millions will read and adopt in their hearts of hearts.
And his lamp, lighting a successful path that became a highway to personal accomplishment, to his personal Legend, makes his heart beam with hope and magic: “Son! You need to find your instrument and write the songthat’s waiting for you to write it before it’s heard all over the planet, in people’s kitchens, in traffic jams on the radio, at work… they will love it and love you and the world will be a better place thanks to your songs [or books/movies/shows/recipes/whatever]”
So the son follows into his father’s dream. Perhaps hampered by the fact his Mister X’s son, for instance. People might expect the same music to run in his blood, or the same lyrics. Or at the contrary expect him to take a radical turn from his father’s (and adviser’s) works, and not copy/paste.
And for this reason for example, the son fails.
Or maybe he never really wanted to be a performer.
Perhaps the son would have been a great general, instead of an artist? (I think that was in your book, right?), whose destiny would have been to SAVE someone, perhaps a whole city or a whole continent, from death, torture and oppression.
Perhaps his calling would have been to reach for the stars and the moon, but not as a poet, but as a scientist? Perhaps the destiny of the son would have been that he’d become the next Newton or Einstein.
Or perhaps he would have just become an everyday salesman until he met with the love of his life?
I’m glad I actually come up with an example from warrior of light, the general, and that my point seems to function well.
We see the second father’s fear was that his son leads a non-artistic life, a “dull” life. But perhaps the son’s nature is to be an accountant, and a happy accountant at that, perhaps one that will play an important role in something on one specific point in his life…
I hope you liked my expression here Paulo. I would love to hear back from you and maybe get to meet next time you come to Paris, maybe to a book fair?
I hope “unknown” friends will benefit.
Please comment, my friends! ;o)
Loves
PS The message above is my intuition on a counterpoint of the value of fear in life.
Others here have expressed better than me all the wrong, castrating aspects of fear and its avatars – anxiety, shyness, complexes, paralysis, helplessness, nightmares, pains…
I just wanted to point out that in Mother Nature, fear is a good idea! Saves lives everyday, from the life of a mouse to our life. :o)
And also, my insight on how and why fear is passed on from person to person, from generation to generation, etc.
Anyway, ideas and concepts and reactions behave like viruses: they spread in the same way.
Thanks to this Wonder of Modern Era, the Internet, we get to be impregnated with Paulo Coelho’s ideas… just like new ideas began moving along new routes, like Marco Polo’s Silk road. Like Christopher Columbus’ route to “India” propagated, for instance, christianity.
Like the merchant’s son travels to many cities before he gets to be a vessel for the Alchemist’s truth.
I am thankful to god that your ideas, Paulo, found their way to my heart and mine… twice now.
Sin el miedo, no existiriamos.
“Without fear there is no courage” Fear is an important aspect of life as it can protect us, but it can also reward us when we overcome it. Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith…in yourself…
My feelings on fear:
The best way to overcome it is to analyze it and work through it.
Having no fear empowers you even if in reality you are powerless.
Having no fear allows you to truly help others in need or in trouble.
You will not be afraid to try new things if you have the power of ‘No Fear’. You may climb to new heights never before dreamed of.
Fear and caution are not the same thing. Fear will cripple you but caution will save you.
Caution is brought on by fear, without caution, there is no fear.
Please, let me live so that my words and actions are not ignited by fear, or held down by fear, but that I am corageous of saying things out as they are, not as they appear to be.
And I wish this for everyone else aswell.
I don’t really understand this behavior. I personally don’t believe in fear/ intimidation of other people. Those whose impose fear upon others are probably unhappy with their own lives. They are too scared to branch away from the crowd that they secretly despise. From my own personal experiences dealing with these kind of people, I think that they are cowardous. They are jealous of people who are not afraid of taking chances. They are wasting too much time on the installation of fear, rather then taking chances for themselves. The only way to overcome them is to stay strong. It can be very difficult!
Fear only comes when we negate our faith in God! It is the exact opposite of faith, in fact! So, I say…that it is important that we nurture and exercise our belief that God will make all things right, but, too, since we, ourselves, are expressions of God, that we must renew our faith in ourselves and know that we have incredible powers locked within! Powers to heal. Powers to protect! Powers to fill our lives with greatest joys and all good things! Clearly, both fear and faith are, then, choices! The choice for me is very obvious.
Can anyone in this forum define an “Aura”?…It can b an scary experience…
On fear:
Unusual yet not unheard of ailment,as ancient as man,very much a malady in disguise.
A camouflaged ambush about to take place_anywhere,anytime_overwhelmingly bruising and tearing flesh…
Some fears are well founded…for instance,something beyond our control.(Cont…)
I disagree with whomever translated my lines…It does not quite sound the same…
I don’t know how fear got into my heart, but I am afraid of a lot of things. I am young, but I am afraid to get old. I have a job, but I am afraid to be poor. I want to have a dream and follow my path, but I am petrified that I still haven’t found it, and I am afraid to never find it. I have been married, but I am afraid that men I like never look at me. I am beautiful, and loved by my dearest friends and my family, but I am afraid of loneliness. I know that it’s all in my head, and I am afraid that I won’t be able to deal with it. Sometimes people call me brave for things I do plain out of fear. I am not afraid to jump out of the plane with a parashute. I am afaid that I will never find out who I really am.
katie, i read your reply and it was like reading my own thoughts. my life is full of fear and by trying to escape it my desperation gets worse and i feel very lost at times.
i hope you will find what you are looking for. be patient and open and follow your heart!
fear is lack of faith in yourself, others and God. basically it’s you affirming that you are unable to handle what will come your way. you need to ask yourself – if any of the above happened to me, would i be able to handle it or would i fold and collapse? you will be surprised at your answer and once you realize that yes, indeed you can handle it.. the fear will vanish like the wispy thing that it is.
all my love,
rita.
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