Fear is a powerful tool. Society uses it to scare us about everything, and to keep us on the track. Family uses it to force to follow their dreams, not our dreams. It took me a long way and I paid a very high price to follow my dream. I’m wondering what to think about Fear, why do people try to instigate this fear in eveybody? And the best option is that, in your opinion, we have, to not respect this unnatural fear and move forward towards our dream.
Thank you,
Paulo
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I like to mention that quote from Michelangelo again
“I began to understand that the promises of the world are the most part phantoms and that to have faith in oneself and become something of worth and value is the best and safest course.”
Fear!
It just “False Expectations Appearing Real”…
It’s a mindset…
It’s something that one can overcome by doing it repeatedly.
Fear. It is not a real emotion but rather a force made either by oneself or by other people.
=)
And as always, it boils down to choosing to staying where you are, unaware that “that fear” is just artificial or choosing to just go over it, anyways, it’s better to know what is than what if.
=)
How can Fear be artificial when we fear before we love? As a child, we are not taught fear, but we feel fear when a large and strange dog approaches. It is a chemical that is released in our brain to protect us.
There are people who know how to reach certain people by playing on their fears. The fear is artificial, but not the primal instinct.
hi, again i’m there,because this topic is very big.the unnatural fears are since so long time.they made beliefs in many ways,they still make beliefs.i remember a book of “umberto eco” “au nom de la rose”,the power of “inquisition”,sometimes i think the situation is better,sometimes i think it’s the same,it’s not so easy to see the truth,even if the truth is,there are always some people ready to deny the truth and others people ready to follow.
It’s not too much to say that fear has shaped my life. It’s because I allowed it to rein my destiny. I think I’m afraid of the same things I was afraid when I were a little girl. Being left alone. Sleep at night on my own.
Some fears have changed or I managed to rationalize them and get rid of them in the end. By the primal fears. They are here.
Sometimes I think I’ll fight them and beat them. But I haven’t got around to doing that yet..
When I meet
the face of fear -
I know I have
work to do…
inside
world-wide-love*
I actually used to be terrified of looking in the mirror and glimpsing my own face… around age 11…
Fortunately, today I brave it!!
Fear is a tactic used to enforce conformity and obedience to the status-quo. Governments use fear to impose laws, the media use it to coerce the opinions of society, and parents wield it as a weapon of power.
Originally, fear is a natural instinct and as primitive as our urge to eat, sleep and fornicate. In our modern world there are natural fears but also manufactured unnatural fears. Think about the propaganda used by governments (of all sides) during the World Wars and the present ongoing so-called ‘War against terrorism”.
It is how we manage and react to fear that is the key. Those who attempt to impose fears upon us are the ones who are living in the stranglehold of fear themselves. Those who experience natural fear but have the courage to fight onwards on their true paths are those who will progress towards achieving their personal legend.
We are constantly surrounded by a myriad of unnatural fears. If we were to listen to them all we would all surely be nervous wrecks! We need to discern between those fears that are natural and unnatural. We need to disregard those manufactured fears that will truly bring us no real harm. And welcome natural fears as a part of the human experience and as a struggle that will strengthen our courage along our pathway to our dreams.
But how do we disregard the unnatural fears? The first step is self-honesty. I believe this is one of the first steps taken towards achieving your dreams. Be honest to what your heart is saying and listen to your dreams. For when you are honest with yourself you can see what truth lies not only within you but also around you.
For the majority of my teen years and early twenties I lived in a state of unnatural fear, but did not have the courage to move forward. I pursued that path that was expected of me and met with success according to societies standards. Good school grades, followed by several university degrees and then the pursuit of a prosperous career. (The education was fantastic, thankfully I studied English and writing, and I thoroughly enjoyed learning.)
However ultimately my state of fear was paralyzing, I was not being honest with myself and I was not happy. As a result of various periods of depression, anxiety, physical sickness and even some drug use, I found the courage and strength to begin to follow the path that was truly written in my heart. I still struggle and fight along this path everyday with happiness, but i won’t allow myself to fall victim to the manufactured and debilitating fears of others.
Many responses today mentioned the fears we impose on children as a way to protect them from evils such as predators. This is a difficult consideration. Children are wide-eyed, all absorbing, innocent and stubborn. Their innate thirst for experience sometimes means that they will “do” when parents say “don’t”. And this includes walking into nasty traps set by the devil. Unfortunately the natural innocence of a child has become the unnatural naivety in society.
There are many evils in the world today, is it possible that we can explain all these evils with truth to a child and he/she will understand everything? I think no. Experience and understanding is what differentiates the child from the adult.
I don’t have children myself as of yet, but this forum today made me consider – how do we balance the protection of our children in this society without imposing unnatural fears upon them?
Christina -
“How do we balance the protection of our children in this society without imposing unnatural fears upon them?”
In my opinion, this can be done by changing our system of education.
The first step is self-honesty as you said and “when you know better, you do better” Maya Angelou
“Children are wide-eyed, all absorbing, innocent and stubborn” when you say do, I say don’t – that’s me too (the little child inside)
I enjoyed reading your posting thank you.:)
I have read that we are born with two innate fears. Fire and falling…all the rest are learned.
While driving with my 3 year old daughter in the car seat behind me, we stopped at a stop sign and a man, that I recognized as probably psychotic, maybe paranoid schizophrenic, crossed the street in front of us. He also had a aura of evil about him not connected to his mental illness. I watched as he crossed in front of us readying myself to react should he approach my vehicle. I heard my daughter say “Oooh, a monster!”
I had never been one to try to control my children with threats of monsters or boogeymen and she certainly was not allowed to watch this type of movie. I smiled thinking “Good, she has it” I was referring to “discernment”. Many times in my life I have avoided potential danger because of my “gut feeling” or “instinct” as it is called.
Much later I was outside doing yard work when I noticed a man with a van delivering Yellow Pages phone books to our neighbothood. My 8 year old grandson and his friend were playing on the porch. I observed the man and determined that he merited watching because there was something odd about him….the word “pedophile” was whispered into my conciousness. I observed my grandson and his friend as the man walked up our sidewalk. They both stopped doing what they were doing and watched him. After the man left i spoke to the children. “How did you feel when that man came up the sidewalk?” “My stomach felt funny” one answered and the other concurred. I said to them “Whenever you get that “icky” feeling it is a sign that there could be danger…always listen to it”
I think we are born with the ability to recognize danger and I believe it should be recognized and supported in our children. This is not to say that we recognize it and let them go on their own. Children must be protected until they are old enough to protect themselves. Whatever that age may be for the size and maturity level of each individual child.
There was a movement in the 80′s to teach children about good touch and bad touch. Some parents thought it enough to teach their 3 year olds then leave then to their own devices. This of course, is a ridiculous idea. During the same time period children were taught about “stranger danger”. Another ridiculous idea since most child sex offenders are family members or people you know.
…and finally, there are women, I have worked with many of them, that have had their instincts damaged through abuse. These women never seem to be able to recognize when they are putting themselves or their children in harms way. I have known women that meet a man and have him living in the house within days. It usually ends up badly with the women being abused mentally, physically or sexually. A certain type of man looks for women like this so he can have access to her children. Infants have died when the mother leaves the man alone with the children…shaken baby syndrome, beatings because they “won’t stop crying” or they find out when their daughter runs away that their man has been sexually abusing the girl for years and the women are always shocked.
As Coelho says “Don’t give into your fears or you won’t be able to talk to your heart”…nor it to you and you will cease to hear your souls complaints about how you are allowing yourself to be treated in this world.
I have been blessed with discernment. I knew it when I was very young. I have not always listened to it when I should have and I have paid a price for that but even that has made me stronger and wiser. Perhaps I chose to learn those lessons and therefore don’t have to be resentful about it.
I have no doubt that I am loved because the same hand that wrote the history of this universe wrote that “Barbara shall have discernment to protect her because I love her and want her to be safe”…a most natural and loving thing for a father to do.
I think in this case it’s good, mean with kids, until they don’t grow up or until they develop. We have to set up some of those (like you said) unnatural fears, cause in other case – you may find out that you got little “vandals” & consequences about it, you may feel on your own skin later. I’m not saying that we gotta go too far with this, since on the other side it wouldn’t be good to set up even some frustrations or etc., but they gotta learn what they can and what they can’t.
Of course it’s a weapon of controling them. But are the children enough strong and wise to take care of their selves alone??? NO! That’s why i’m saying it’s ok – but just for a little kids.
I don’t think so!!!
I agree with you; you are very lucky for being able to break free from your fears although you paid a big price you said; a lot of people cannot; including myself. It’s very hard to get rid of those fears especially when you have chosen to forget them instead of confronting them; deliberately choose to be in a state of amnesia to be relieved from the pain they might have caused or are still causing; they would make roots, control your life, chain you without even being conscious of their presence!
Fortunately I have not been forced to do or not to do something through fear. Thinking right now about this point I realize my worst fear would be don’t have dreams.
By the other hand, fear can help me to overcome any thing, because it is a challenge to me.
Blessings!
This post really resonated with me. I’ve spent my life catering to that fear, listening to everyone else’s claims that my dreams are unrealistic, and keeping my creativity in the shadows because of that. Only very recently have I begun to share my work unapologetically, and to live my life with authenticity. Fear keeps us bound to the typical. Faith in the fact that there are no limits is the key.
Fear, unfortunately, is a big part of our lives.Everyone we meet injects their share in us. You cant do this, cause then that might happen. It is really hard to be above it.
I am lucky, cause my family lets me be who i am, they dont force some job on me that i dont want.But they have injected their share of fear in me anyway.
First, religion is a big source of fear. In many ways, these old rules keep us from living our lives fully. I am fightning against them in my family.I have my own religion, intuiton, telling me what is right and what is wrong. Many times, this has turned out better than their unflexible rules.
And then there is fear that comes from personal experience, something that pain created. No one wants to be in pain, we are afraid of it, and because of that we let fear lead us. Fear of commitment, fear of showing our true selves.
Doesnt matter what kind of fear, it still has a unbelievable power over us. Over the body and over the mind. Different fobias are the best example.
Honestly, I couldnt imagine a world without fear. Not yet atleast. People arent ready for that. But everyone should fight with their personal fears, try to overcome them. I am afraid to speak in public, yet i make myself do it all the time. More I do it, better it gets.I dont think its possible to get to a point that you have no fear , but more you do what youre afraid, more you know how to deal with that fear. And that is important. Get to know yourself.
I never let fear of heights stand between me and good photos. That doesnt mean I have overcome it, i just have it under control.
These are my first thoughts about this subject. More I think about it, more opens.
Thank you, Paulo, for attracting our attention to that subject this week. I dont think people think about it often enough.
Liz, about the fears that come from past personal experiences. These are, indeed, some nuts to crack.
As human beings, sometimes we hate change. Especially when we’re growing older. When we find out who we are, what we think of the world and what opinions we have about different situations/objects/people etc., then it will be so much harder to reconsider them, or change them. I am not saying, we should not have those opinions – if we didn’t have, then we wouldn’t know who we were. But what I am saying is that sometimes those opinions, that also have to do with fears about several things, can be very hard to overcome.
So I agree with You, strongly, that in those cases, we often let fear lead us. Mainly it is because we are unable to change our point of views/feelings (that FEAR) about that certain thing.
I have seen people, who have become the slaves of their own fears for years, decades, even sometimes to the end of their lives. It is sad to see it, that sometimes fear blinds us so deeply that we are unable to see the harm that it’s causing us while we follow this feeling. And since we are blinded by it, we do not see a way out, or even a need for the situation to change, to actually FEEL better. To get out of that feeling of fear.
Although, fears CAN be overcome…
but that happens, when we dare to venture to the other side.
Find out about ourselves, look into ourselves. Dig a little deeper.
Sometimes it may hurt.
But sometimes You have to go a little bit lower to get a whole lot higher. Feeling confused and helpless and actually admitting it, to being able to actually change something and improve as a person in the future.
Love,
L.L.
A little while ago there was tragic fire in a huge block of flats in south east london, many people were killed, including children.
My friend works for the council affected and when I asked her why so many died, she said, she thought it was down to the fact that despite many people escaping via the exits, many people didn’t react and subsequently suffocated.
I also watched a program some years ago on television where they had a pretend seminar and invited one guest, the rest were actors, a fire with smoke was lit in the hotel, but the actors were briefed not to respond. Out of the number of people tested, only one got up and left, the others seeing the non reaction by the actors did nothing.
One of the major causes of fatalities by fire is by hesitancy, going back to get their money, etc.
You would think that the greatest fear known to man must be FIRE, but peoples instinct to react to this very real threat seems to be affected by the “SHEEP” mentality. If no-one else is scared, then why should I be, it couldn’t happen to me.
No RUN, REACT & QUICK….when this is a REAL fire, in a REAL situation.
The reverse is also true, the SHEEP mentality, doesn’t like to see anything different, it has adhered to the rules of inherited acceptance passed down from generation to generation Anyone that tries to break free outside of the norm of these rules, must be treated with absolute suspiscion and made to realise their mistake. Afterall the SHEEP knows best, because a SHEEP doesn’t know any different and a SHEEP doesn’t like to think outside of eating, drinking, reproducing, and the rest.
The blind leading the blind. I too suffered as a result of rebelling which is why I am so vehement.
Very interesting!
So we are all lemmings…. hehe..
which never makes for an intelligent civilisation, no!?!!
;o)
Listen to the words:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SREZ-ggSDjM
Everybody is free to choose:delight,fear or something else to feel.The scale is well known-7 chakras.The inner tower of Babel can be build,when the blockade as Fear and etc. is removed.Early demaging imprints should be altered.Let’s be Alchemists..
Dear Paulo,
Thanks for these great forums and topics. It helps to me to air my thoughts without ‘fear’ of rejection ;) and without ‘fear’ of what other people might think of what i have to say !
My mother’s fear was that i would be labelled a argumentative/big mouth/arrogant/tactless etc person and that would put me in trouble with my future husband and his family because i had a habit of speaking out was on my mind (honestly) and what i thought even to an ‘elder’. In India , women are not expected to have opinions and should not beleive strongly in anything except the religion and gods of the husband’s family!!
Was her fear unfounded? I thought so as a child…although as an adult married for 13 years..i understand the foundations of her fear! Did it get me in trouble? yes it did. The most often repeated sentences in my marriage by my husband are:
1) Don’t talk back (if i state my opinion on a subject contrary to his views)
2) Even if i’m wrong, don’t contradict/correct me ..especially in front of others.
Why am i still married? Maybe because i was conditioned to expect trouble listenning to her ‘fears’ over the years.
Sometimes fears are based on common sense and serve a purpose. Fear is an overall complex subject with multiple facets.
One such facet is where someone wrote about ‘bogeyman’ tactic to instill fear in children (I am guilty of this offense..if this is really an offense.) Some say we should try to reason with a the child and explain why he should not run away by himself in the dark (which may be metaphor for running away in a mall) etc. If there is a way to explain reason/logic to a 2 to 3 yrs old child in a way that they will understand and follow it, please please let me know. I can use that skill!
How can you explain to a child that there can be pedophiles who can inflict damage on them in a few minutes that they are taken away in a mall. We have to use stories and metaphorize the consequences.
As a child i have been in situations where i was almost molested and wasn’t it aware of it. These images were stuck in my mind for quite sometime and i never even comprehended it unitl i was an adult and realized how close to danger i had been. I think my subsconsious mind held on that image and kept playing the incident back to me as memories ..until i understood it’s significance and realized i have to be cautious on protecting my own children.
As children we know no fears, but either Adults instill that in us (based on their experience) or we learn them as we grow adults based on our experiences. Such fears are needed for survival and instilled by our subconsious.
The other types of fears that keep is from action…we just have to conquer them!
love,
Laxmi
Dear Laxmi,
When I was a child, my mom expressed the same fear. I remember very clearly an incident where I refused to let a boy help me carry a bucket of water. I thought, I can do it myself – I don’t need your help just because I’m a girl. Afterward, my mother pulled me aside, with great rage in her voice (which now I know was fear), and the words that she spoke sounded like a curse. She said, “You will never find happiness with any man, because if he is too weak, you won’t love him, because you’ll know that you can overpower him. And if he’s strong, he’ll never put up with you, because you won’t allow him to act like a man.” Maybe she was right – I don’t know. I do appreciate and acknowledge chivalrous gestures, such as a man opening a car door for me, or walking on the side of the traffic while passing along a sidewalk. But I’m not going to act like I am weaker or less intelligent than I am, just to appease or attract a man. Maybe that’s why I’m forty-two and still single. (Ha ha! …though my mother probably wouldn’t think it very funny.) I wish you all the best in navigating the social norms and customs in reference to your husband. It is not easy, I know.
As for the children and all that, my own daughter is now seven. Since she was very small, I have never made up tales to try to keep her from danger. I just tell her the way it is. The real dangers that are out there seem to be enough to keep her adequately vigilant. When it comes to the dangers of shopping malls and public places, I have always told her quite openly about children who are abducted. Every time I hear of such a case, I share it with her, leaving out only the graphic details. She knows that most of those children never survive, and she knows as well, the specific tactics that child molesters often use to lure their victims. I just figure that the more real information she has, the better prepared she is to avoid becoming a victim herself. She doesn’t seem overly disturbed by any of this, because we have always talked quite openly about it. I think for her it is just as much a fact of life as the hot stove in the kitchen – she isn’t traumatized by the thought of it, but she knows to be wary of it.
Anyway, those are just my thoughts on kids and how we might protect them without instilling undue terror. Just talk to them openly and honestly from the start about the real dangers in life. Even the tiniest tots are often smarter than we may think and capable of grasping much more than we might expect.
Much love to you, Laxmi. Many blessings!
Savita
being tactful in relationships ensures there longivity, afterall we are all human and humans have ego incuding me, you and your husband.
what u have said about indian women is one view, i have observed something diffrent in my family and in families of my aqunatnces and freinds. as per me, it’s women who takes most decsions, but often they communicate those decisions to me in moments of close intimacy and then again in such a manner that it appears as if the decision was by the man. women don’t hanker after credits too much, or should i say they did not hanker after credit in the past, now a days women are loosing their womenhood, wearing men’s dresses and all.
fear, fear not !
love
aditya
More than ever … in a world where all is made to entertain systems of fear, …. tools (like spirituallity) to discover or reactivate inner peace (the exact opposite answer to fear) are essentials to bring ourselves on the way of real freedom ! may the univers conspires now to make this more affordable to everyone … & thanks paulo to be the catalysator of this changements through your artistic masterpieces of mystical litterature.
your words have surrounded my path each time i have thought of how expansive i have already paid (& still paying…) the price of life to follow my dreams & achieve my personnal & unique legend *
may the unique one bless you ! my inner god does i too ^^
The root cause of fear is failure…offshoots of that are being ostracised, alienated by friends etc etc…most just want to blend in…most are afraid to stand-out…that is why ppl just do ‘what is required of them’ …whatever that is…work, school,marriage etc…many dont even stop to think ‘what exactly do I want???’ cos they are too afraid to even delve deeper for fear thzt what they may want is unachievable…that is the fear that is greater than all fears – being too afraid to discover ur highest truth!
everyone wants to be accepted n appreciated…most think that this is the highest form/source of happiness…so most continue to strive to achieve acceptance from others thinking it’ll make them happy…when in actual fact, true acceptance must start with self..only then can one be truly happy…and true acceptance of self means following ur intuition n passion/dream..
Alot of ppl say they dont have a dream though, but I believe everyone has intuition…
Well said.
O medo é uma maneira de se impor um limite ao ser humano. Veja só a grade de notícias da grande imprensa nacional: mortes, assaltos, pânicos, desordes, etc… O fato é que a notícia tem de ser dada, mas, na minha opinião, existe todo um processo muito bem dirigido à sociedade para que as pessoas fiquem atônitas com a quantidade de informações negativas veiculadas. Quem tem medo é muito mais fácil de ser conduzido. Assim, grandes grupos fazem com que o telespectador não tenha vontade de sair de casa, consumindo muito mais enlatados televisivos e alimentares, pois acha sempre que a rua e a sociedade está um caos. Não questiono que nós vivemos um período realmente de muito mais exposição à violência, mas a vida corre com fatos positivos e negativos a cada dia. Se não fosse assim, fatalmente já não existiria um ser vivente nesse planeta. É muito mais fácil evidenciar o medo, as tragédias, pois assim a auto estima das pessoas fica cada vez menor. Quem é feliz é positivo, tem também sua auto estima alta, sabe bem mais o que quer, por onde procurar. Luta com mais garra, principalmente pelo social, avalia com mais isenção e lucidez. O medo nada mais é do que uma cela que escraviza os olhos e atitudes do ser humano.
I have heard it said that the only obstacles we have in our path are the ones we put there ourselves (which when imagined can be bigger than the reality) and I guess that this unnatural fear is a potentially huge obstacle to try and overcome.
I don’t think that the government/people want to put fear into “everybody” but I do agree that inducing fear is a form of manipulation that is used by those who we let have power/influence over us (government/family/close friends etc.)
At an individual level I think people encourage fear in others to avoid having to face their own fears and the truth.
At the government level I think it encourages some level of reliance/dependency and so helps gain votes and reduce questioning, which I personally feel goes against what freedom stands for. I am relatively lucky though as I live in a country where the unnatural fear is implied and not enforced by both implied fear and physical pain.
On a positive side, I believe it takes extra courage to overcome unnatural fear and that courage can feed hope and so out of bad can come good. When we have struggled hard for something then in someway I think it has a greater value than if we were given it easily – whatever “it” may be.
So thanks for sharing your thoughts and your own journey Paulo – you, like many other in this planet, clearly have courage to have found ways to overcome your own fears and it is a beautiful thing to share that with others to encourage hope that we can all try to do the same.
For the one with eyes-wide-open,one who knows what is seeking for, fear, discriminates between winners and losers, puts one`s will to test, to overcome “false” beliefs,artificial limitations,made by self and others, something which puts one under control of a false ruler.
For the beginner, the one who has just Opened eyes, fear is devastating, the point of death, even if after that extends the heaven.If pass it, the eyes see the Light ….. realize myths from fact ……
For the by-stander, fear is the tall wall, paralyzing, and distressing, making beauties inaccessible.
the difference of the three, relates to the clarity of Goal, the motivation to achieve the goals, this is it, the motivation which sets the contrast of the stage for perceiving the FEAR,in darkness, it is a beast, in minor light, it is an evil, in light, it is ….it is it, not important!
I really loved Your vision of this topic. A bit of an academical rooting in explanation, but very well chosen words and manner for it.
Lovely.
And it really is so: when we’re in light, entirely, it is not important. Although… life is not so simple. I guess we all have our “darker” sides, in which we feel incompetent or not fully as good as we hoped to.
But there is always possibility to have it better.
If we can step over the threshold…
If we can finally see, that life is about oportunities, and as well as we are able to – siezing them.
Love,
L.
I feel down, but I stopped digging.
I am still drowning, but I already know – I have to get out of the river.
I thought I need to see a psychologist, but then I start following Paulo Coelho on Twitter…
Thanks, again. The topic about fear is right on the nose.
Don’t you think, the inspiration can’t coexist with fear?
I have couple of stories I would like to finish. Years ago I had an inspiration, but I didn’t have the time. Now I have the time, but my inspiration is paralized…
Karla
Karla – try to look into every day life. It may be an option for You.
We may be taught different things, if we’re open to it. :)
Good luck on the search!
Love,
L.
I grew up in a religous home, and in the christianity there is a fear of hell. The fear of hell is stronger than the will to get to heaven. I don’t believe in hell nolw, I left chistianity but my relation whith GOD is stronger than ever, as a result of that choice. But still, sometimes thinking of hell scares me. I’m kind of damaged becouse of that thought.
Hey Albin! I can relate to u…I like u grew up in a christian home and was terrified of hell…like you as well, now i dont believe in the biblical concept of heaven and hell as a location somewhere (one above in the clouds, one below the earth)…its all psychological…also like you, i have abandoned christianity and religion all together but i have never felt more at peace with myself n the world …my relationship with the Source is overwhelming…I dont see any separation btwn me and GOD..WE R ONE! together with the rest of the world! Its amazing!
But unlike u, the thought of a burning furnace i.e. hell, where all ‘sinners’ go, amuses me! It is especially amusing, when I talk about my new found oneness with my Essence (which is God) without religion, and my religious friends esp. christians, tell me that ‘i need deliverance’ or ‘the devil is using me’ and I will go to hell but they will pray for me! LOL LOL LOL…i always ask them to pray for themselves first and ask the good Lord to reveal himself to them..
I read somewhere the saying of an ancient eastern spiritual teacher (cant remember his name)…he said: ‘I have seen God through my heart’s eye and asked ‘Who are you?’. God looked at me, smiled and said: ‘YOU’!!’
Very simple yet intensely profound. Many religious apologists wud call it blasphemy tho…
wish u the best in conquering ur fear of hell…and NO, u r not ‘damaged’…u can NEVER be damaged cos u r in the words of the bible, ‘wonderfully n fearfully made’…xx
Its funny how different people are affected and interpret what they are taught. I was also taught that there is a hell but I never feared it because I was also taught that God loves us and that he knows we are not perfect and yet he still sent his son to absolve us of our sins, that when you are genuinely sorry for your sins and try to change your ways that God will always forgive you because He loves you like the father of the prodigal son.
I always thought of hell as of our own making, that when you turn away from God you create your own hell because you live in depression/darkness.
I’ll go with what Neale Donald Walsch said on the subject, basically there is ‘caution’ which keeps us alive as in “HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT CAR!” then there is fear which is an unnatural state of being. Fear is basically love inverted. Don Miguel Ruiz and Carlos Canstaneda would go as far as saying that fear is a living entity, a parasite wishing to feed off of what it knows.
In the Christian cosmology the father of fear is Lucifer, because he feared that God would love Adam more than himself. It wasn’t so much that his pride got in the way, it was his fear that there wasn’t enough Love. This in my opinion is the ultimate fear every one of us faces, because we seek attention and affection from certain individuals and not others. We limit the love we give and receive and thus we Create the very thing we fear by limiting this infinite resource. It is like holding our breath and saying ‘oh there isn’t enough oxygen on the earth”! How stupid is that?
Fear in the sense of creating panic needs to be eliminated. Caution will always be there. Being ‘startled’ will always be there, but fear is manufactured. 100% a learned characteristic.
From a buddhist perspective, fear of death is the most primal of emotions and causes much of our suffering because we provoke this fear of death in others and this reminds us of our own ultimate demise creating fear in ourselves.
This is a complicated subject that has philosophical angles, biological angles as well as spiritual angles.
An important subject indeed.
-C
PS- On a totally unrelated subject: You look tired Paulo. Remember to get enough sleep.
christian
I like your site and the music,-crystal clear -
:)
I am not sure that fear is created by others to stop us from moving forward. Fear is part of our make up, part of our experiences with the outside world. The contrast of our skin, our aura, with other sensasions, wtih other limits and other auras. We keep opening our auras and touching the exterior world with fear of what the other side will be like and how the other side will become part of my extended being.
Fear is the door, the checking point, that we cross every single day after we wake up. Sometimes fear sleeps with us and help us travel to places in our unconscious where we are able to act of those relationships, on those work conflicts, on those family conflicts…
I am worndering if my fears, are also your fear, and all fears are part of a cosmic fear…
Txispa
Christian..perhaps he just had a fun week end with late nights :)
NO, I AM NOT TIRED. THE PAST PODCASTS WERE RECORDED EARLY IN THE MORNING.I LOOK LIKE SOMEONE WHO JUST WOKE UP
fear of the unknown is what holds us down. For us to leave the comfort zones and venture into the new is a hard decision. We take a long time creating more fear in our hearts with our insecurities and listening to other people around us who in turn fill us with more fear! The initiative lies with us. Let’s dare the wild, lets listen to that voice within, let’s drop the fear in order to maximize our potential.
thank you Paulo.
O medo é uma sombra,normalmente temos medo sempre,de errar,de perder dificilmente podemos encontrar algume que nao tema nada,na verdade o medo nosda a sobrevivencia do perigoso,dos erros,mais tambem nos restringe bastante se deixarmos isso mais forte diante das açoes do dia-a-dia.
podemos ficar horas a fio dizendo oq é e oq nao é o medo em si em nos para os outros.
simplismente fico com meu pensar. “O medo é arma dos covardes para a fuga,e conduta para os errantes”
beijos.tenha uma linda semana!!
Once again what a wonderful topic from you. We have just seen what it can do in an instance in the United States where both a police officer and professor reacted with fear to a situation causing it to become much worse than it would have had to do otherwise. There is an acronym that I was taught a long time ago for fear– False Expectations Appearing Real.
Like the acronym!
” FEAR – False Expectations Appearing Real.” I like that too!
:)
Must appreciate Obama on this,
the way he recated initailly, was like a normal person would recat, but then the way he sorted it out over a mug of beer refelcets the class and timelessness of teh man. this chap Obama means well, he is good, may he succeed ! amen
love
aditya
Interesting posts here, as many people as there are, that many opinions and ways of feelings things.
Everybody has fear inside, you can’t escape it! It’s just a matter of how you deal with it, and what actions are appropriate. Sometimes you HAVE to have patience there is no other choice, unless you allow yourself to do some major damage say one is so angry that they can kill, but is that right, even for following a Dream? I don’t think so.
so it’s something EVERYBODY has, feals and give off. so best to learn how to deal with it.
Cuz people as just so used to sticking Their own fear in your face, sometimes you just have to ignore it and let them live it out because to those people just nothing understands.
oare despre ce sa mai scriu?am scris despre viata,despre iubire,dar parca am uitat ceva…am uitat sa scriu despre suferinta si tristete..nu pot termina aceasta scrisoare ignorand momente atat de importante,nu pot,trebuie sa scriu despre tristete si suferinta.aceste momente de singuratate sunt clipe in care sufletul lupta cu realitatea,incercand sa regaseasca drumul spre fericire,spre iubire.tristetea este poate o greseala,dar poate fi si un miracol-depinde de noi,de armele noastre interioare,deoarece daca vom iesi invingatori vom intelege ca si supararea este o forta binefacatoare-este o minune,deoarece ne-a ajutat sa ne continuam calatoria spre ideal….iar daca reusim insemna ca am facut o greseala,ca acest vis nu este pentru noi,deoarece nu am muncit destul pentru a-l realiza…..
http://adikady.forumgratuit.ro/forum.htm
it is good to see ROmanian language, a lot of words are very similar to Italian.
:)
I have been very lucky with parents who supported me in my choice of friends, activities and in following my interests/dreams. In my twenties I did join religious life, because I wanted to dedicate my life to street children. For some reason it was regarded wrong here, to come with a plan for a vocation. One should just learn to be Obedient, and that meant to let go of as much of what you were, and certainly of any dreams.
I have been very unlucky with having to spend time with individuals who love to manipulate their surroundings by using psychological terror. Parents withholding love, if one didn’t obey. Siblings withholding love, other family members withholding love, if one didn’t do as they expected.
The fear of Rejection, is perhaps one of the hardest fear I have struggled to conquer. The fear of loosing the love from our significant others. I believe today, why I feel overall VERY happy, and sane, is because I clearly perceive what my heart tells me, and BELIEVE it. If a person cannot accept me for who I am, and don’t want to spend time with me, I don’t try to cling to this person, or blame the person, or try to manipulate this person to please love me. The fear of Rejection is conquered when Rejections are welcomed as a message that ‘we cannot go together through those parts of life’, so we better just go each to our own.
Of course, I believe parents withholding love for minor children, because the children pursue to become who they really are, those parents are executing Emotional Abuse. But also, children, who withhold love to their parents to manipulate them to give them what they want at all times, those children are executing Emotional Abuse towards the adults. Mental power games…just try to find the balance and keep the quarrels to a minimum, because they ‘eat you up’. Everybody should have the right to decide for themselves how to live life at any moment, without a threat of loosing love.
Decía Albert Einsten que nuestra religión es la región del miedo claro siempre nos han dicho que si no hacíamos esto nos iríamos al Infierno. Crecer así es crecer con miedos, tambien nos educaron diciéndonos “que viene el hombre del saco” etc. Los miedos son utilizados para conseguir los fines eso es porque no dominamos por completo la energía del Amor si así fuera esto no sería utilizado porque la energía del Amor es más potente que nada en el Universo es la materia sútil con éste fue creado así pues nosotros estamos hechos con esta misma matería.
Recuerdo que cuando fui madre tuve que suprimir muchas formas creadas de miedo en la educación aun así no pude suprimir las que te ayudan a ser cauto y tener precaución.
El miedo no te ayuda a crecer ni amar más, mas bien todo lo contrario. Suprimamos el miedo vale, creo que es una forma anticuado de educación.
Un beso Paulo y ¿Qué precio tuviste que pagar?
When I think of fear, this saying often comes to my mind:
“Se correr o bicho pega, se ficar o bicho come.”
Something like:
If you run, the beast will overtake you;
if you stay, the beast will eat you.
This is the effect that fear often has – it renders one unable to make a decision at all. This is the worst position to be in, because when we lose the ability to take a decision, there is no way that we can win.
I think that fear is something not coming from outside, but from inside of us. Of course it is triggered by others, but since we can do something about us ourselves, it is in our own heart.
Is it really unnatural? Like if society let us fear things, isn’t it just like an animal that let other animals scare so they do certain things… it sometimes feels that way..
I think fear is something natural, because it is made to scare us away from dangerous things, but since intimidating/influencing people isn’t really dangerous, it is something we shouldn’t be scared of, yet we are.
I believe that the only way to face our fears is to take the challenge, to do whatever you want, to say to yourself that you don’t have to be afraid. And if we overcome it, that is truly a great thing!
So for all the people who are afraid of small things or big things, I just wanted to say, keep the courage to face your fears, ’cause we all have the power to overcome them, even when it doesn’t seem that way. And once you’ve done that, the world gets a little brighter :)
Petra
Perhaps the one place in the world where I was completely without fear / or able to balance my fears.
An incredible Place ;o)
Million thanks for sharing your wonderful thoughts with us!
What you completely right call “unnatural fear” is nothing but an instrument of power. Just as there exists physical violence to bring someone into subjection there also exists mental violence by causing this “unnatural fear”. This method can be used as you said by both society (by government, spiritual leaders etc.) and individuals (in family or relationships). Causing fear is the main instrument of modern democracies to control its society, as physical violence is culturally not accepted any more…
Much respect from germany,
Tania Tempo
hi, yes the fear can be a powertool,but i hope that this reality is not opening the door for another fear, the fear for this powertool,the way to the confusion.
I totally agree with you Mr. Coelho. I truly believe that fear is a tool utilized by the ones in control, in the highest levels, to control the habitants. I had a long conversation with my son Vincent, and was very impressed by his knowledge. He is only 15 years old, but since his early childhood always reading books (history, legends, alchimist, old fraternities, and YOU at 11 years old). As he talked to me, I knew deep inside me with certainty of all that manipulation of those men in power. Everything is calculated and well coordinated. And if you do not “fit”, well, beware. I also had a “dream” in which I was instructed of how it functions and why. Now, by listening to Vincent I can say that I had a “special dream”.
Unaware of that power that they have on us, unconscious, we just go with it. Family, well, they reproduce what they were taught to. I was raised with the words “do not dream, so you won’t get hurt”, “you are a girl, poor you, you will not be able to attain your goals since all is made to be in the man’s control”, etc … This Sunday, I realized that at that moment I was told the truth, but well, at 5, I interpreted it on another level. I was in total despair and wondering why God made my heart beat. I went to school, did what others did, like a robot, my body following, but my soul and my spirit not participating. And I think God today of that, that my spirit and soul did not participate in that “education”. All that way of seeing life, of trying to conduct me to studies so to have a job so to pay bills so to have a family so to have a nice retreat after and so to finish my last days happy and fulfilled, well, for me it made no sense. They filled my head but not my spirit and my soul. Well, it made an impact, and I had to struggle to clean that away, but I stayed connected to another conscience.
The words of my education, of what I saw, heard, observed taught me the biggest fear of all for me, the fear of living. I did not want to fill in that form, and I did not want to believe that life what that. I feared to live that life. So I went on the rebellion, but by that I hurt myself. Wanting to leave that world that made no sense, that find security in obeidance and soumission to things that meant nothing to me, I wanted out. And then that voice and a force that came suddenly …
I decided to follow that voice. Now a multitude of fears surfaced, even attacks from the dark side. But that showed me that I chose the good path. I decided to follow my intuition, to create my dream, to seek for the life I believed deep inside was intended for me. So much fears appeared, so much words to discourage me, but I continued. I even had to confront my parents, to affirm myself, to leave my husband who said “if must come back to what it was, normal”. But I told me “then I will die and so I must leave you”. I took distance from the ones who “feared for me” and discovered people who “believed in me”. I developed faith instead of fear, the power of God. I said to myself well if death is at the end like they say, it is the same as the other way.
You ask why people try to instigate this fear in everybody. Because that is what they are taught to do by the manipulation of the “ones holding the terrestrial power”, and because by fear they can control and pursue “their” goal. I understood that I must save my energy, because even the director of a school does not know that he is manipulated from a higher sphere. It is easy to see that when you have a sensible director, someone who starts to change things, he is dismissed, or in burn-out, and another “robot” comes to take its place. The only thing I do is respect myself and not participate in that mascarade. If they convey me to a meeting because “my kid is not perfect”, well, I send a friend, a cousin, to respond to the protocole, but I call and say why I will not be there, and my kid knows why and is in total acceptation, because he is a kid with a supra conscience and he disturbs all authorities.
You distinguish natural and unnatural fear. Fear is natural and necessary. It alerts of a danger. It is part of the instinct. But beware because instinct makes as response don’t move, flee or attack. Living is not acting like that. Liberty is not being in a survival mode. Fear is a natural and important message for me. Unnatural fear (fear of being rejected, fear of not being loved, fear of what the other may think, fear of hurting, fear of not being good enough, fear of not being capable …), those are legitimate due to our past history, experiences. But I welcome them, am sensible to my past, etc, and then go on. In the past those controlled me. Those are the fears that were communicated by my education, my family, the society. Those fears can gouvern, dominate, invade and even kill someone.
With affection, Jojo
Hi JoJo.. thanks for sharing that…
this whole ‘terrestial power’ domination is real and, I agree, is about “their” dream.
It’s nice to hear that someone else also stands up to masquerading and refuses to take part ;o)
i cannot come up with the answer although i tried to…i do not know why people would tell this kind of things to the other, especially to loved ones…maybe, is it safe to say because they are spiritually blind?
Fear is the contrary of love.
Love is not opposite of Hate. They’re both strong feelings, and lead people to action(in two opposite ways).
But fear, on the contrary,lead people to the non action, to the escape, so it’s really the contrary of Love.
When Jesus asked his disciples to love him completely,in the boat in the middle of the storm, he didn’t said them “do not hate me” he said “don’t have fear”(that is “act and have faith”).
So I think fear is one of the greatest sin (the meaning of sin is “wrong target”).
love.
Chris
Very well said Cristina. I love your every word of it.
Thanks for your entry. I love that you pointed out that Jesus said to just have faith in him. Man, for control (which ultimately if you think of eternity, he has for a partial second) tries to ignore the universe and do it his own way, ignoring the signs and promptings. The universe (God) loves us and especially when we go after our personal legend, fulfill it, and help others through it. If we will just listen with our hearts and tap into the soul of the world, faith will over come fear and also help us to truly understand and get around those who try to control us.
and faith is a synnonym of love
fear or faith – god has given us free will to choose.
love
aditya
Paulo,eu acredito que quanto mais Amor temos ao nosso próximo, menos medo nós temos de qualquer coisa…A medida que o tempo passa vamos perdendo nossos medos, talvez porque aprendemos que temer não vale a pena!! Tudo passa…
O Medo.
Há histórias que dão medo. Muitas delas passam-se longe de nós e, para as esquecermos basta desligar a televisão. Outras, passam-se bem dentro de nós, ao nosso lado, à nossa porta. Não podemos desligar, elas existem e entram em nós quer queiramos quer não. Quando essas histórias, esses medos, entram em nós, os momentos parecem eternos, as ilusões esfumam-se, o sono não chega e nem temos a noção clara de qual o caminho que devemos seguir ou como poderemos contornar o obstáculo que enfrentamos. A força, a energia que existe em nós é infinita, nascemos com a capacidade de subir às mais altas montanhas, com a capacidade de descer aos mais profundos abismos, com saber para chegar à lua, a Marte ou inclusivamente ao centro de nós. A única coisa que nos separa da conquista destes objectivos é a vontade. A vontade Humana, e a energia que nela depositamos. Querer, poder e fazer. Querer é um acto de sabedoria, é preciso saber e conhecer para se querer alguma coisa, Poder é um acto de liberdade só pode quem é um ser livre, Fazer é um acto de vontade. Para enfrentar o medo só temos que: Querer, Poder e Fazer.
This is something that starts very early on in life, I think – first the family and then society as a whole begins to instill these unnatural fears in us as a means of control. I will give two examples:
First, I can remember, as a child, being told these bedtime stories about black panthers, an uncommon animal, but nonetheless, one that roams the forests in the area where I grew up. These were more than stories – they were legends, passed on from generation to generation, as a way of instilling in children the fear of going outside of the house at night. Each story is slightly different, but the outline is always the same: some child wanders off or is caught outside of the house after dark, then stalked and eventually ripped to shreds by a black panther. (Sometimes the character of the child is replaced by a young maiden or a pregnant woman, but the outcome is the same.) As a child, these tales used to terrify me; I don’t think there is any way that someone could have shoved me out the front door of my house after dark. In essence, these legends served well the purpose for which they were intended – to instill in me the fear of wandering off alone after dark, thus insuring that I would not do so.
One might claim that there is a very practical side to this. After all, there were panthers that roamed the forest near out house. Not infrequently, we would hear a panther scream. Still yet, it is the mechanism that is most significant here: a legend passed down from generation to generation with the intent of instilling fear in children and thus making them easier to control. Fear as a mechanism of familial and social control.
Now I give the example of my own daughter. I have noticed how my grandmother, as well as my aunts and uncles (basically everyone of their generation) has a tendency to utilize fear as a means of controlling her actions. My grandmother has a den that is filled with all sorts of breakable whatnots, the door to which always remains closed. Any time that a young child comes into her house, she says, “Don’t go in that room, because the Bogey Man lives in there, and he’ll get you!” Always it is the Bogey Man; if the child does not do as they are told, they are warned that the Bogey Man is going to come and take them away, or otherwise eat them right there on the spot. Black panther, Bogey Man – it’s all the same thing: fear as a mechanism of control. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bogeyman)
Of course, some might argue that it is necessary to control the actions of children, but it is HOW we control them that is of greatest issue, I think, because it is in early childhood that we set up this pattern (threat > fear > control) which we eventually learn to follow even as adults. The alternative would be to talk to the child about the potential REAL consequences of their actions – reasoning with them and teaching them to employ logic – and then let them decide for themselves whether or not it is worth the risk. So why don’t we do this? Because we don’t trust them to make decisions for themselves. We feel we need to force them (by use of threats) to follow the way that WE have selected for them – in our opinion, the only right choice. Risk is an element that we seek to erase from the life of the child at a very early age. Rather than teaching them to accurately assess and calculate risks, we teach them to avoid risk altogether.
This is, of course, all carries over into adulthood as well. Just as the family does not trust the child to weigh and make decisions for him/her self, so society as a whole, does not trust the individual. The path is all laid out for us and bounded on both sides by the threat of danger. Society tells us the path we are supposed to take, the choices we are supposed to make every step of the way, and if we do not, the Bogey Man is going to get us! Something terrible is going to happen to us: we are going to end up destitute, or alone, dead, or worse. The social norms are carefully laid out for us, and we are terrorized at every corner, instilled with the fear that something dreadful is going to happen to us if we do not follow that straight and narrow path. Because we are taught from a very early age to respond so well to the mechanism of fear, we learn not to ask questions, just do as we are told. We learn NOT to take risks.
There is no doubt that familial and social terrorism takes many forms, but, in my view, perhaps the most brutal and unforgivable form is when this terrorism involves spiritual matters or decisions. If one is not free as a spiritual being, they are not free at all.
I go back again to my childhood for an example. In the elementary school that I attended, many of the children were of a particular Protestant Christian sect (whose name I will not mention). At any rate, the rules and norms of this particular religious persuasion were very strict. As well, this sect is highly fundamentalist in that they believe that their church is the only “real church” and that anyone who does not subscribe to their religion is going to Hell. I still remember very clearly, arriving at school one Monday morning to find all of these children very upset. Some were even in tears. The classroom was a mess, because the teacher was trying to figure out what was wrong with all these children. One little girl finally spoke up and explained the whole thing. The night before, at church, these children had been made to watch a film about Hell, which was apparently very graphic. It showed in detail the horrors that awaited them should they, in any way, stray from the faith. They saw the supposed face of the Devil, they saw human beings being burned alive and screaming in torment. They were told that this is what would surely happen to them if they did not follow the “one true path.”
I was very young at the time that this happened, probably not more than seven or eight, but still I remember being struck by the injustice of it. How could these adults be allowed to do this to these children?! Why didn’t someone stop them? Of course, what they were doing was not criminal, at least not in the eyes of society. In fact, it was deemed as perfectly normal and completely legal to terrorize these children in this way. I can only imagine that the effort was probably highly effective. For the rest of their lives, these individuals probably remembered the horrors depicted in that film any time that they even considered adopting a different spiritual path.
Fear is indeed an enormously powerful tool that both our families and society as a whole frequently use to “keep us in line” – to convince us to follow the path that THEY have set down for us. With this institution of fear comes the negation of the willingness to take risks. We are terrorized on every side by the dreadful “What if…?”
What if there IS a black panther outside, waiting to eat me? What if the Bogey Man DOES await in the shadows of that room? What if there IS a burning Hell, and at its gates, the Devil with his pitchfork, just waiting to skewer me? What if I fail? What if I’m wrong? What if I make a mistake?! What if…? What if…? What if…?
As for myself, I think I’m going to take this week to consider the various forms that familial and social terrorism has taken in my own life. Where have I allowed those fears to be implanted in my life? What paths am I hesitant to acknowledge, what risks am I refusing to take, for fear that the Bogey Man is going to get me?
I certainly hope one of those paths you’re hesitant to ackowledge IS NOT writing, because you’re a beautiful writer. I used to sit at my computer with two t-shirts on, a NO Fear and a Just Do It, because I needed both and still do, better dig them out of the drawer.
So many facets of fear…the Fear that the Church has instilled in its followers for 21 centuries is what immediately comes to my mind. And then there is also the fear an artist may experience while exhibiting, or even creating. But then there is also the lack of fear in the likes of musicians such as Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Charlie Parker, Thelonius Monk, etc. who went out there on that stage and put themselves out every night, improvising and creating dynamic art. All good food for thought this morning, Paulo.
Fear is about control. If you can make someone fear something, then you can control their reaction in regards to that something. Even if that something does not exist. There have been many examples of this in the past, and they continue today.
The movie Jaws in 1975 spawned a generation of people scared of being attacked by sharks, and the number of people trying to kill sharks jumped around that time. That was never the intent of the movie, but it illistrates what can happen when you can get an entire group of people to be afraid of something.
Politicians use fear all the time. Maybe you can convince the people of your country to forgo some of their basic rights out of fear of attack from terrorists. Maybe you can get them to agree to a health care plan that your country could never afford out of fear that the current system is leaving 10 of millions dying on the streets. Now it really does not matter if the threat of another terrorist attack is small, or if there really are not tens of million of people dying on the streets for lack of health insurance. Fear has nothing to do with facts, or the truth.
And that is where it gets its greatest power. Through fear you can convince an entire group of people to ignor facts, ignore the truth.
We need to start teaching our kids to not give into fear. To instead investigate, to discover, and most importantly to conquer their fears. A great man once said “the only thing we have to fear, is fear itself”. How true that is. Fear has always been used to control the masses, to help progress or hold back society. But often times, that fear only last so long because someone comes along willing to confront that fear. How many times over the course of human history as the story of a haunted woods or area kept mankind from expanding into that area? Countless I am sure. That fear may last generations, each one embellishing the story more and more, and each generation of children growing up more and more afraid. But eventually a child is born that is will to confront their fears and go into the forrest, find the truth and bring it back to the people.
Only when people learn to move past their fears can they be truely free.
I really enjoyed reading Your post, Derek, and many other people’s here, who claim that if we do not get blinded by it, and have a new attitude towards it, it frees us and lets us think differently.
PS! Have You ever seen the movie ‘The Village’? If not, please do. It ‘s main theme is FEAR and using fear, which extent will only become clear in the ending of it.
L,
L.
fear of the unknown is what holds us down. For us to leave the comfort zones and venture into the new is a hard decision. We take a long time creating more fear in our hearts with our insecurities and listening to other people around us who in turn fill us with more fear! The initiative lies with us. Let’s dare the wild, lets listen to that voice within, let’s drop the fear in order to maximize our potential.
thank you Paulo.
It’s my belief that fear is simply an illusion that we buy into or are conditioned to believe is real. There is a difference between acknowledging real danger or urgency when our lives are truly at risk, but the kind of fear that society, government and family try to magnify upon us is simply a way for them to project their personal belief systems on us. In some cases, I think they do this because they feel that they’re “protecting” us from doing something they have failed at or from being disappointed, as they may have been once upon a time. There are however times where I think fear is used simply to manipulate us into conforming or living a life by their standards (substitute the word “their” for anyone: boss, parent, spouse, friend, sibling, publisher, producer, President). Ultimately, WE have to wake up and realize that the only thing stopping us from living to our highest potential, the only person keeping us from moving forward is ourselves. That can be liberating but world shattering to accept and to apply in everyday life. But when you can reach that conclusion and really believe it, that’s when I think things really start to make sense.
You bring up a very good point, I think: the magnification of dangers. Sure, dangers exist. But the question – the real question – is just how great are these dangers? Accurate assessment is key. It is also an ability that many of us have lost, or never learned, because we were taught to respond to dangers which were magnified beyond all reality. Yes, Life is full of risks, but we must learn to calculate ACCURATELY these risks (in relation to the potential gain) in order to determine whether or not they are worth taking. Just the existence of risk is not adequate cause for negating a certain path. We must not magnify the dangers, nor should we allow anyone else to magnify the dangers in an effort to influence our decisions.
Cher Paulo,
La peur est la pire des choses qui puissent arriver a un etre humain.
La peur paralyse.
la peur nous fait faire des choses qe nous n’aurions jamais pense de faire.
La peur nous fait perdre nos moyens.
La peur nous eloigne de notre reve.
La peur nous condamne a une vie solitaire.
La peur nous empeche d’etre authentique.
La peur est installee partout dans notre vie, dans les medias,la famille, les institutions, le systeme d’education.
.Et cela resulte en ce que tout le monde a peur de tout le monde.
ENfin bref, de quoi nous donner la chair de poule…. :)
beijos,:)
Marie-Christine
Dear Paulo,
Fear is the worse thing that can happen to a human being.
Fear paralyses.
Fear makes you do things you will normally never do,
Fear leaves us completely at a loss.
Fear keeps us away from our dreams.
Fear condems us to a solitary life.
Fear prevents us from being authentic.
Fear is installed everywhere in our life, in the medias, the family, the institutions, our system of education.
and this results in everybody being frighten of everyone else.
All in all, a pretty spooky sort of affair….
:)
Marie-Christine
hi,marie-christine,
your fear for the fear is so big ?…it’s also a naturel feeling,even i don’t like to feel it,sometimes it helped me to survive.
I intensely despise the fear that human beings use to enforce control of women.
How many disadvantaged women around the world lack the opportunity to even escape their confines and seek a freer world.
Every day, as a woman, I feel like a slave to man’s desires.. constantly tricked and trapped. If you are healthy and strong you can outwit these for some time… if you grow ill, then even the cloak of decency and protection seems snatched from you.
I ask myself again and again, how can they dare to act in such a way… have they no morals, no concience, no respect… beyond their ego desires and daily wants.
I look forward to the day when women are free…
living without the putred fear of being attacked and robbed of themselves.
Until this occurs, society will always be a place for me full of opportunity mocked; goodness unprevailing and fear standing with a sly, sleazy grin.
hi,that’s true fear is a tool.i don’t think this tool is only bad,it can also help us to survive,wake up us,push us to make choice.but i don’t like to feel it a very long time,so i have to understand it,often quickly,to leave it.
That fear is very real, and I have experienced it many times in my life.
I was once even told that if I followed my path, that the Devil would attack me, and I would be powerless to defend myself and survive.
To walk away from the group, or family, or a loved one, because of your conscience, or consciousness of a path you must follow is very painful and hard.
We are social beings. We need to communicate. We need others.
The isolation and pain of walking away can be horrendous, especially as many times we have to endure a period when nothing comes in to our lives to fill the vacuum or void left by separating ourselves from the group, family or loved ones.
Sometimes it can be a long time before the new road opens up, the new path with other people emerges.
In that desert, in that solitary place where we have jumped into our destiny and refused to listen to the fears, we can feel a fear and pain that can almost destroy us. Suddenly we have no support. All the support and strength and belief must come from within us, and from any relationship we have with God, or whatever or whoever our Higher Power is.
I have shaken for hours, my whole body and soul trembling with fear from this isolation on more than one terrible lonely night.
But, with God, I survived.
I read this morning that St Augustine said that we need to restore to health the EYE OF THE HEART WHEREBY GOD MAY BE SEEN.
That EYE OF THE HEART can only open when we are willing to walk away from the fears of others, and trust our inner heart’s calling.
Blessings everyone.
Let’s do it.
Karen xxxxxxxxx
The kind of fear being suggested on others, to clip away their wings, to hold them under control, to stop their own pursues and make their lives go as we would want them to go, is a negative use of fear.
Why it is used? Maybe, because it is one of the deepest natural feelings that we feel. It never lets you down. In Estonia, we use an expression: “blinded by fear”. This happens when people are so overcome by it, that they cannot think rationally. The fear is controlling them. It can be done so well, subcontiously, that You won’t even notice it. I feel like the events that are happening in the world are doing it for us. And the media uses it very well aswell. All the news of the wars and the odds of nature (floods, earthquakes, storms, etc.)… it gets to us, even if not conciously, then in the unconcious we know it.
Although fear is not all bad. Since it is such a strong natural instinct, even still inbedded in humans (even better in animals of other kinds), it helps us to prevent bad things happening to us, it is a kind of a self-survival technique that we have. So this would be the positive side to the feeling of ‘fear’.
If we didn’t feel fear (at all), we probably would stop excisting with all the accidents waiting to happen. I would like to think that fear is a part of common sense. Although if it is taken too big of a part in us, it prevents us living a good and happy life, and possibly prevents us living our dreams.
Even if fear can be good for us, individually, it is never a good thing when it’s used to grow mass-fright, or when it’s used in any way to make people blindly follow it.
Love,
L.L.
I agree with you, Liina, that fear has its good side. Fear is, after all, a natural biological mechanism which has developed to insure our survival. The important thing, I think, is to first learn to distinguish “real dangers” (actual perceived threats to our life or well-being which present themselves in our environment) from “apparent dangers” (those numerous specters of our imaginings which haunt us like ghosts).
An example of the former might be the imminent approach of a category 5 hurricane. Some people might look at this and say, “Oh I am fearless – I will stay and ride out the storm.” In this, they have nothing to gain, and everything to lose. Their show of “fearlessness” is sheer foolishness. On the other hand, an example of the latter might be the risk of failure should one pursue writing as a profession. In this case – in reality – there is everything to gain and little or nothing to lose. Not in recent history has anyone been crucified or burned at the stake for being a writer. Whatever dangers there are primarily concern the loss of social acceptance. Here, the fool will say, “I am wise – I am taking the safe path. My dreams are not worth the risk involved.” (I use writing as an example, not in reference to Paulo, but because it is my own dream, and I thus far I have been very very foolish.)
Of course, life is seldom so simple as that. But, whatever the case may be, the key, it seems to me, is pinpointing precisely what the dangers are and calculating as accurately as possible the risks involved. Often times we react to something as though it were a life or death situation, when really the risk isn’t that significant. Then sometimes we want to prove ourselves fearless and we act the fool, putting our life or the lives of others at great risk, and for no potential gain at all.
There is a time for fear, and a time to be fearless (or as Aditya says, at least a time to overcome and ignore our fears). The key is to learn to adopt the proper response, depending on the specific situation. There is a time for fight and a time for flight. God grant us the discernment to tell the difference between the two.
I think that probably it would be less exciting to follow a dream without the presence of the fear.
what was the heavy price u had to pay paulo ?
fear is linked to survival instinct, does it have any positive purpose also.
natural fear is for fear of things like falling from height, getting drowned …..
unnatural fear is like “what will people say”
i will be egerly awiting what wols have to say about fear.
love
aditya
As I said on the podcast. EVERYBODY was telling me that it was impossible to make a living out of literature. I thought the were old, therefore they were wise. So, I postponed following my dream for quite a long time, even if I was a rebel while young.
Unntural fear Aditya? How do I put this? MY most unnatural fear is the fear of having no “dream” at all. This feeling almost scares me to death, and makes med walk around at the surface of the earth as a zombie…. without a “goal” and without really purpose. That is so scary!
sheela hi !
prayer said ! did u meet the deadine, ask paulo how important it is to keep one’s commitements if one is to ‘prosper’ in this world. hey why don’t u get me a writing assigenment in your mag.
love
aditya
Hello Paulo,
So wonderful to see you!! :)
This is a great post! Fear is a Very powerful and strong emotion. It’s the Fight or Flight syndrome, usually.
Fear gets stronger by Fear. One must be in some sort of a fear to instigate fear in another. Then it becomes a domino effect.
It is best to not give into fear when it concerns certain things, like our dreams. How? that’s a good question. I would think this would be different for everybody, but it’s important to keep our attention on our dream!
Love
C.
Yes Carolena !
It’s important to keep “an eye on the oildrops in the spoon which are our dreams and one eye on the world, enjoing its fantasy” as paulo’s wise man in alchemist put it.
I feel it’s not possible to be fearless entirely, but it is possible to act despite fear !
love
aditya
Thanks paulo !
u indeed are a great human being, a great soul, who says what he means and who means what he says.
“I was a rebel while young.” Once a rebel, always a rebel, although with age that fire may become more mallow but that fire won’t die. just like your smile.
love
aditya
dear Paulo,
i really admire you for being who you are now. so courageous. and so generous. hmmm, i feel like all who somehow conquer the fear become kind of generous…
anyway, you are really like a boy in the Alchemist. i like that very much.
love
chieko
Perhaps that is why Paulo seems so young – because he HAS followed his dream and continues to do so. Age seems not to touch him.
I agree with You, Savita Vega. We will have to start listening to ourselves, be true to ourselves and the world, and I hope that then we will be able to figure out at which point our sense of fear is a common sense or a work of gut-feeling/unconcious senses, or if it is unrational.
But only finding it out is not enough. Sometimes we find out, but we don’t act on it. So let us also have the courage, after exploring the truth, how to act on it.
L,
L.
I hadn’t read this response, Savita, before commenting on my hope you were pursuing writing. I’ve thought about it in reading your posts for the past few weeks and finally found the perfect vehicle, the question of fear, to offer you a small drop of courage, to fill your writers cup with, so JUST DO IT! KEEP WRITING!
Dearest Savita,
Your post and Nicolette’s reply to it and your reaction to Nicolette’s reply reminded me of two proverbs and of my own life experience.
First, “never place all the eggs in the same basket”. I understand only too well your fear of starving if you dedicate yourself totally to writing. That is why it is comforting to always have a backup. As for me, at the age of 25, I got aware of the fact that I was completely incapable of going on being an clerk at a commercial bank. So I quit. Said no to a comfortable, well-paid job and said hello to… nothing. I had no idea what to do and what to live on. Luckily, I was finishing my education as a linguist. So I started giving private lessons and suddenly I liked it so much that I’ve been doing it since then. For more than 10 years now I’ve been self-employed. From time to time I work for different universities and educational centers. Then I started to make translations and I’ve been doing it with pleasure for a few years. The job offers appear out the blue, but I always try to be involved in a number of projects at the same time. Just in case.
Secondly, I am convinced that the phase of doubts and fears is absolutely necessary to accumulate a certain “critical mass” which will finally lead you to a point when “the fear of becoming a flower is much worse than the fear of remaining a bud”. You’re a beautiful flower, Savita, and you’ll enevitably open your petals when the moment comes. I’m sure you just can’t stay closed, not with a talent like yours.
All the luck possible,
and may your fear be reasonable and … helpful,
Oksana
you have to keep your wits about it elizabeth delage.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hMrY8jysdg
Queen – I want to break free
Everytime I hear that song I am having a bit of a giggle.
I lived in the middle of the desert for many years .Quite a few characters were living there, one of them an Irish doctor.
One of the young woman I used to work there was having a baby, and suddenly out of nowhere here is our Doctor (I used to call him Chevvy Chase, he used to look like him) bursting out singing “I want to break free” as she was going through her contraction and holding a glass of Guinness telling her how good it was for your health. Needless to say, she was not too impress…
:)
Yes, and that’s what I’ve discovered, through myself, not through any books. I’ve read books later on that says the same thing, and I can see how thing really match.
But still, to hear the message, u are beein used by devil, he is decieving and fooling you, I can’t help to be a little scared. The devil is a redicoulous thought, and the hell is really useless for a god that is allmighty. But I just grown up whith it.
Thank you for your message anyhow. I really enyoy life now, I can see the beuty and how everything is bound together, like tones in a beutiful symphony. That symphony I try to listen to everyday, couse then I know that life ALLWAYS is meaningful and worth living. You have to be tru to yourself.
Fear is suffering and suffering is my idea of hell…When fear is etched deep in ur mind from childhood, it is hard to get rid of but u are on the path and if u continue to focus on the beauty and oneness of all that is in the universe, you will one day wake up and realise that you are no longer afraid…cos there is nothing to be afraid of…
if one sees the concept known as ‘the devil’ as the enemy, then it is normal to fear it…the ‘devil’ is also known as Lucifer..the bringer of light and knowledge…so he cant be so bad! all he ever allegedly did if indeed he exists) was open the eyes of the first humans so that as the bible tells us ‘they became as gods, knowing the difference between good n evil’…neither good nor evil is absolute thus if there is punishment/reward it cannot be absolute either!
on the other hand, If indeed God didnt want Adam/Eve to eat of the fruit, he wudn’t have told them about it…and if at the time, they didnt know the difference between good and evil, y did he punish them??? even if he told them not to eat of the tree, how cud they hav known that doing so was ‘evil’? isn’t that unfair?? its like punishing a baby for urinating on your shirt! they dont realise what they’re doing is bad…surely, God isn’t soo irrational and unjust to punish like humans as with the legal concept of ‘strict liability’ where one can get punished for doing something they didnt know was a crime e.h. selling rotten meat even if u didnt realise it was rotten when u sold it…
i dont understand it…so God has harboured a grudge against mankind from time immemorial and we still get punished for something that happened thousands of yrs ago e.g. pain at childbirth?? I struggle to love a God like that…maybe thats why christians preach ‘fear God’! maybe there’s a mystical explanation…if anyone knows, pls elaborate cos the creation story never made sense to me…n its one of the reasons i abandoned religion…
Anyway, I’m ranting now…basically, all i’m tryna do is just make you know that there are many ways to look at it…some fear God,some fear the devil..some fear hell…everyone wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die! LOL
Thank you. :) The music actually isn’t mine it’s by a Japanese singer song writer called, “Naruto” (*No relations to the Japanese animation series…)
The background of the site isn’t mine, but the large illustration is.
I’m going to be releasing a compilation of all four graphic novels in a few weeks including ‘The Ones’. Should be cool.
Thanks for taking a look at my site. :)
I like Miguel Ruiz too. I have several of his books, one of them is always with me “Prayers” A communion with our Creator
The “Four Agreements ” helped me a lot too.
:)
:D perhaps. He’s just looked so tired in the last couple of videos. I just hope he’s taking care of himself that’s all.
-C
Well I’ve never really felt that I’ve grown spiritually from fear unless you are referring to overcoming fear. Fear other than for personal growth in my opinion is something to be disposed of. Each individual has certain trepidation about life and yes I do believe in some ways we’re aware of one another’s energy and even the events in other people’s lives, not consciously, but what is referred to as ‘superconsciously’. In my belief in death all is known so experiencing another’s emotional state at that given point is not a problem. I feel as though when people are fearful they are running away from what they set out to do. This is problematic. Many times ones fears aren’t even their own rather they are developed from information from another say a parent for example. Perhaps one’s mother has a fear of spiders and this manifests in the child. It isn’t the child’s fear, but it becomes the ‘property’ of the one who accepted it.
I look at the difference between fear and caution as this: caution is like a drug one receives from the doctor’s office- fear is like crack-cocaine which eventually kills us. Both are labeled, “Narcotic’ however only one is beneficial.
Thank you, Nicolette. I used to have one of those NO FEAR stickers pasted on the front dash of my car. It wasn’t that I was intent upon being reckless, but just that I felt I needed that little burst of courage it gave me, driving on the California freeways in a tiny VW Beetle. Maybe I could use one of those stickers now, pasted on the face of my laptop.
Thank you,
That is exactly what I am doing now – looking for the signs, because: “Not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck” (HHDL)
Still feel stuck and afraid to move into the wrong direction…
I even went to see Sylvia Browne in the NYC. Each answer I am getting now creates more questions. I have never been in such a state of mind.
Get used to it (it is a luxury to have a time to look for all these answers) or get busy?
Love, Karla
Again, thank you, Nicolette. I needed to hear that.
Funny because I recently did a Tarot reading just to get a little more clarity on the major changes that seem to be occurring in my life right now. One of the cards represented the question of work: What do I need to be doing at this point in my life? The card I drew was like a bold neon sign, just that clear: WRITE! The card scared me, because I thought, “My God, I also have to eat!” That, it seems, is the core of my fear – the fear instilled since childhood – the stereotype of the “starving writer” – the idea that one has about as much of a chance at making a living by writing as one has of winning the lottery. THAT is the fear that I must overcome. It isn’t the fear of writing so much as the fear of starving if I throw myself into it completely.
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement!
:) Well mystery solved.
Maybe I was thinking about my own sleeplessness
so it was on my mind.
Thanks for the topic Paulo.
-C
thanks Christian, sounds interesting, I will look you “Up” again
:)
Hello Aditya, Annie, and Carolena,
What a wonderful topic. We can easily list fear’s troublesome qualities; the ones that paralyze us on the road to our dreams. But, can it be said that fear has its place in this world, serving a divine purpose – a purpose that can actually push us along in our personal legend? Like Aditya said, it may be impossible to be fearless entirely. I have heard that fear is the opposite of faith. And since our lives at some point consist of bringing opposites into union, it could be that fear acts as a catalyst for faith, and a deeper relationship with God. To use Paulo’s words in The Fifth Mountain: “courage is fear that prays”. Do we not need fear then, to have faith? Does it not build our courage? Is this how we “keep attention to our dream” as Carolena says. Just how there is life in death, and death in life, is there not fear in faith, and faith in fear? Just a thought!
Paulo, is this what you meant my “courage is fear that prays”?
With love to you all,
Sevander
Karla -
I too feel like I am treading water…
and for a long time have attempted to balance ‘fear and intuition’. Sometimes it feels as if the flood is too strong – but I remember that I AM a good swimmer and strive to keep faith ;o)
It is difficult to keep track and map a way out; but I think writing it down – even as a map literally, or in an account shall help… this is what i shall be doing anyway!
blessings,
;o)
Get used to it or get busy?
I have no idea, Karla. Although, I know, that getting used to something may make us numb. That’s what the phrase “getting used to something” means to me. The other option – keeping Yourself busy, is equally as bad, but has a different meaning for me. Keeping Yourself busy means for me running away from myself, running away from looking into myself and trying to figure out – why. If You know what I mean.
For me, it worked, when I let go of all the questions and started to move in fluid, taking in everything that every day life had to offer me. I also listened to the nature and I almost felt like my heart was beating in the same rythm as it was beating. I still do it, but the reason I am talking about it as being in the past is the fact that this helped me on my journey to my inner self.
I am not saying this will work for You. Different things work for different people. That’s just how life is. I think You have to find what “ticks YOU off”… what works for You and You only. In spiritual searchings, we have to be a little “egoistic” so to say, to truly find ourselves. I am putting it in the marks (” “) because I joke about it being egoistic, because I have been living my previous life to make my parents and everyone around me happy, doing what they think I should do, instead of living my own life. Actually it is not selfishness, but finding Your own way. Egoism is blindly living. This is not what I meant, so that’s why I put the word between those markings.
I think a challenge for You, Karla, is to find that special thing that works for You. That special thing that frees Your soul. It’s easy to say that – this is what You should do. But it’s not easy to say how. I believe, every person have to find out this themselves… I believe, if You listen to Youself, You will find it. :)
Best of luck!
Love,
L.
Thanks for your reply Marie-Christine. ;-)
So true, education is such an important building block for society. It is one of the factors moulding the next generation and then the one after that and so on. If only we could get all the educators in the world – parents, teachers, the media, governments – to get it right!!
And yes, I was also thinking of my little child inside when thinking about the wide-eyed, all absorbing, innocent and stubborn little children that we all have been..and still are.
thank you CHristina,
Have a good day.
:)
yes that is my observation too : once a person goes past fear, one becomes generous !
love
aditya
Hi freind !
dreams don’t reveal themselves in dreams, we have to dream, consiously !
life is an opertunity and u may utilise it for whatevre purpouse pleases you, it maynot be as grand as saving the planet, it maybe just as simple as appreciating oneself seeing a bewutiful flower, or working with children, tecahing them. In case u wish u can shoose to be a warrior of light..
i agree it can be scary. their is no great predefined purpouse to life, u have to givbe it menaing, that is your freedom and your responsibility too.
love
aditya
great synthesis Sevander
love
aditya
it’s a matter of taking things in the right perspective, i think, all these are tools and we should know how to use them. life to me is an oppertunity to expereince a plethora of expereinces and share them with ‘freinds’.
poison taken correctly acts as medicine and medicine taken wrongly can poison us.
love
aditya
Thank you for sharing this with us.;-)
It is relieving to hear that children do have a sense of discernment that adults sometimes take for granted. Perhaps children who are allowed to be themselves are in touch with the balance of the world, and will have gut instincts that repel them from danger.
I hope that I may watch my future children grow with a healthy balance between my protection and their own discernment.
I’ve had a few more thoughts –
In my original post I referred to “natural fears” and “unnatural, manufactured fears”. Perhaps I should rephrase this to be “healthy fears” and “unhealthy fears”. Perhaps these labels better suit my meaning.
Healthy fears being those that help us stay true to our course, save our life etc.
Unhealthy fears being those negative fears that are often pushed on to us by society or governments etc.
Thank you for one more wise and useful insight, aditya. :-) As you will see in on of my “newer” writings above, I do consider myself a warrior of light. So strange you mention it here!;.) SOOOO, i guess that is all there is to it – warrior of light – you – or I – fight for the light at any cost. Even in the dark night of the soul, which seems to be ever-lasting….. – I will fight for light and for spreading love and warmth and caring amongst us! What a life purpose. yes it is. Not frightening, but what a job! Useful job. :-D
Dear Liina
thanks for your note.
i`m not a native english speaker, the academic rooting is because of that.
i meant outside darkness, but you added an interesting view about inside darkness. nice.
best
Dear Aditya,
You seem very wise and i have read some of your posts and think you have some good insight. I’m not going to lose that esteem i have for you based on your reply to my post above..especially the statement: ‘women are losing their womanhood’. I understand that there is a lot of conditioning about expectations of a women’s behaviour in our society. Always women’s behaviour..not mens. I guess it takes a lot more effort to think outside that conditioning.
‘Womenhood’ does not lie in clothes..a women is more than the clothes she wears.
As for speaking with tact and using intimate moments to convey ideas..i think that will make the marriage last longer and provide peace but at what cost? The cost of a woman’s pride(and why shouldn’t women have ego when men do?).What can’t men accept a open ,direct and honest relationship? Is the man’s ego so delicate that you can’t take your wife’s opinion if given openly and honestly in a living room versus the bedroom?
This ‘tact’ that you refer to ..i call it ‘manipulation’. A women ends up giving her honesty to be subversive and tactful.
I have also observed women (my mother, mother-in-law, grandmothers etc) being subversive and trying to get their points across tactfully. In many situations i have seen my mother-in-law having more commonsense and suggessting good ideas(tactfully) than my father-in-law but just to be ignored are discarded because he isn’t that smart.
If i don’t stand up for myself and say what i want without unnecessary/unnatural ‘fear’…this sorry state of relationships will continue from generation to generation.
I want it to stop with my generation even if it means fighting with my husband and losing peace in the family. (My sons see that theor father is being unreasonable and so they will be better people when they grow up)
This is my legacy i want to leave to my daughter-in laws to be, grand-daughters yet to be born….the freedom to speak their mind without fear!!! This is my homage to all the women born before me and who have suffered in silence and fear!!
love,
Laxmi
P.S – I am not threatenned by a differnt opinion. I can understand and appreciate multiple points of view.
Everybody should have the ability to exercise their free will as long as they are not harming themselves or others.
That is what makes humans different, yes !?!
:-)
Yes, may someone succeed in leading this forsaken country. God help us to overcome our past!
Thank you, Oksana, and thank you for sharing the wisdom of your personal experience. It is always a joy and a boon to hear the stories of others’ successes.
Many blessings!
Savita
Can’t agree more, Savita, it’s always a boon to learn about other people’s successes. I’m always impressed and inspired by such stories. There are at least three successful female-writers’ stories that I like most. When the boom around Harry Potter broke out, I remember being more impressed by the story of creating the books, the miraculous tranformation of J. Rowling’s destiny. And I also admired the fact that she had written A FAIRY TALE, not a criminal drama, not a scandalous erotic novel, but a book for children.
Then there’s a very inspiring story of one of my most beloved authors Joanne Harris (www.joanne-harris.co.uk).
And, finally, Stephenie Meyer, the “mother” of the notorious Twilight Saga told a fascinating story of her transformation from an average housewife and a mother of three into the world’s best-selling authors. Moreover, the fact the she “saw” the plot of her book in a dream is simply overwhelming. As a result of this dream, she became a famous writer, there are movies created on the basis of her books, and, most surprisingly, the small town of Forks and the Indian reservation near it are now thriving. Of course, it may be a good marketing strategy, but it is truuuly encouraging and fascinating!
Blessings,
Oksana
Dear, dear sister in Greece,
Recently, I watched a French movie called; ‘Turn the page’ about a young girl who failed a piano contest (because of noisy adults) and then gave up her piano lessons too. As a young lady, she then ended up working as a page turner for a fairly well known pianist, with nerve problems. During the movie I was thinking about you and Thelma all the time. This movie is not your story, but it gave an insight in the enormous pressure there is, if one wants to perform and play the piano professionally, almost to the point of ruining the art itself. The young girl ended up ‘giving her talent’ to the son of the pianist, and the story revealed how much love can grow between individuals understanding one form of art, here piano music. I adored this piano-love-language between them.
Yes, WHY NOT dare to follow your heart. The wonderful thing about being adults, is that WE CAN.
Love,
Sis
WOW… I think i Love You… jaja
What a lovely posting Annie.
The strenght that glows from it. Love it. This ‘feeling alive’ that You are describing is great. I hope more and more people experience it.
All best to Your continuing traveling. :)
Love,
L.
You are welcome dear Annie,
Have a smiling day :)
You are right Annie!Media always make it sound bigger than it is.I’m not saying that it isn’t important,but the media do what they want to do with us.They lie,they manipulate,they exaggerate,they make you believe what they want.Spreading fear around so we have only that in mind,but still,our problems with jobs,taxes ect..are still here too.I sometimes wonder if it isn’t made on purpose,at least some of it.I know how it sounds,but still,I wonder.
Thank you, Annie. You are always so very sweet.
Much Love,
Savita
Dear Annie,
I know how you feel and couldn’t agree with you more. The media in and of itself has become a form of terrorism. According to the news, the sky is always falling, or about to fall…the end of the world is imminent. Are you prepared?!
I don’t dispute the facts that are imbedded in the media messages (well…maybe some of them…no, maybe a lot of them), but, at any rate, whether the facts or correct or not, it is the way those facts are employed that I bring into question. Sensationalism has become the norm, and this is what deeply disturbs me, because sensationalism, by its very definition, blows everything out of proportion. The aim becomes not the conveyance of accurate information but the intensity of the effect that can be achieved with this information. The goal is to shock, to startle, to alarm – to terrorize.
At this point in my life I don’t even have a television, because truly I find very little on it that is of any real value. Perhaps I’m missing a lot, but in this way I find it easier to regulate the flow of news and media influence that I do receive. At least I am not constantly bombarded by sensationalist and terroristic messages. And I’m not like an ostrich with my head in the sand either. I do care about what is going on in the world; it’s just that I like to choose carefully the media sources from which I receive the news. I don’t trust just any and all sources.
It used to be that I enjoyed certain television stations, such as the Discovery Channel or National Geographic, but I have noticed in recent years a drastic shift in the way that even these channels present their information. They too have become dreadfully sensationalist.
Whatever happened to the concept of just relating the facts? Why this great need to throw everyone into a state of panic or shock, horror or rage? Do we really enjoy having our emotional engines in the “overdrive” position twenty-four hours a day?!
It is a complex subject, but definitely I can sympathize with your feelings, Annie. You know, the funny thing is, if you turn off all the news for a month (no TV, no newspapers, no internet headlines…nothing), when you come back after a month, the world is still there. It won’t end just because you missed something. It won’t even skip a beat. But somehow we develop this idea in our heads – like an addiction to the sensationalist pill the news media feeds us- the idea that we absolutely MUST stay informed at all times. But, the truth is – it’s okay to take a break.
With Much Love,
Savita
Hello Annie!Yes I know how you feel.
When I feel like that I write,I sing,I go to seek beauty somewhere out of all those lies.It can be a simple thing like going for a walk..or whatever and I tell myself that it’s all going to be fine if I don’t stop being myself.We are not like them,and the things we hold inside of ourselves and the things we know,they don’t have and they don’t know.So when will come the time that the world and life will take another turn,it’s going to be a shock for them,but for us,it’s all going to be fine,because we had stayed true.True to ourselves and true to others and we have lived feeling with our heart and soul,not through lies and manipulations.To let no one control your life,no one buy you.
Have a nice day :)
hi annie, turn off your tv,don’t read newspapers,stop to listen others people,sometimes!try to live your day,your present,what about the sky today? and this bird or this cat,are they so busy? don’t feel guilty if today you smile,the world need smiles also.true, there are many things in the universe,black holes,wars ect…but at the same time there are also flowers and others wonderful things,you cannot forget them,because they are!
It would help the society bond better with each other, if governmnets across the world decide to switch off all TV ( don’t swithc off FM radio though ) on weekends. channles would have to create little less of ‘breaking news’ and people may start visiting ecah other’s houses for a little old fashioned socilaising, now fast becomming extinct.
1 echo your thoughts annie.
love
aditya
Dear Annie and Everyone,
Watching the news constantly reminds me of the burden of Atlas, who literally carried the weight of the world on his shoulders.
I think someone else mentioned that FEAR is false evidence appearing real, I have to agree with this also.
We are subjected to global disasters, taken to wars in countries that we have never heard of, witnessing horrific murders,brutality, etc. When a hundred years ago we would have just been concerned about the local village, we now have the worlds disasters thrust down our throat.
Because of this I think it is easy to get a false perspective on danger and perceived threat. Instead of concerning ourselves with our neighbours, we concern ourselves with situations over which we have little or limited control in any real physical sense.
There is always prayer of course, the physical realm is not the only one and we are only as controlled and manipulated as we allow ourselves to be.
I agree with you Annie. My God has always been ever forgiving and loving to all. He fills my life with love and light. It’s just sometimes I forget he is with me. On another note….there’s always room for you on the magic carpet!
Hello Annie and Savita,
I can Totally sympathize as I also have the same feelings and views about the media, the state of affairs of the world, and the mass fear they try to instill in us and keep us in the dark.
Savita, so true what you said about the Discovery channels, as I’ve also noticed that. How sad, honestly!
EVERYTHING is controlled and manipulated!
I’m much happier not listening to the news, I rarely do anyway. My form of news is from what I hear around.
Love
C.
Dear Annie and Savita I´m agree with you, I don´t see tv. We can decide, you must choise to see all you wont. In the world we have many things good and you can sintonizer.
Kises for you two
Thank you dear BFF Heart, for thinking of me and Annie with the .. sound of the piano.. Remember music is the language of the Angels..
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Ah, yes! I so agree with you, Aditya. Wouldn’t that be nice – just one day a week with all the shops closed and no media. Unfortunately, that will never happen. These days we have to make appointments to “go-a-visiting” (as we call it here in the South), because even on Sundays, everyone is out shopping, or if they’re not out shopping, we might interrupt their favorite TV program. So we have to call first before we show up. Guess we have to find our own individual ways to “unplug” from the mass media and the buying frenzy and “reconnect” with what is most important – people.
Yr both very welcome! The language of Light Angels in the case of you two.
Much love xxoo
lol…viva women anyway!
Thank you, Annie. It is great to be a woman, and pregnancy is the best!!!! (highly underrated – from conception to birth, it is fabulous)
That’s beautiful, yet I know from experience that the value of the advice depends completely on the choice of the source of drunkenness.
What a BEAUTIFUL comment Annie!Lot of LOVE to YOU too!:D
That is beautiful Annie….I want to be drunk on love. I think it’s just the best to be drunk on :)
Dearest Annie,
You must have great pull with the weather witches because I was out walking for 3 hours today and wait for it….NO RAIN!! I am such a happy camper now.
Tell them keep doing whatever they’re doing and thank you. It’s great to know people on the inside :)
Thank you my litle Annie and if you mum is Thelma I´m your aunt.
Kises for you
Yes, VIVA EVE, anyway!!!
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
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