Telling the Truth is ok. I think we should tell the Truth. But sometimes it hurts. I’m not going to tell someone : “Oh, I hate your dress.” It’s not going to add anything in the Universe and it’s going to make this person very unhappy.
So, in which condition can we lie? I’m counting on your answers.
Thank you,
Paulo
DON’T WORRY ABOUT YOUR ENGLISH. BUT IF YOU FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE, POST IN YOUR MOTHER TONGUE (PORTUGUES, ESPANOL, FRANÇAIS, ETC.).
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Here is a bit of dialogue from my novel Life of Joni. It clarifies the relation between truth and lies
What is truth?
Oh, an easy one to start with, hey? Truth is a word of power. To know the truth is to have more power that those who do not know the truth. It is a tradeable item. Truth is a saleable product in a commercial world. It is as fragile as the words that comprise it, as temporary as the paper on which it is written, as ephemeral as the cyberspace in which it lurks. Truth is a claim of the truth teller for omniscience. Truth is a ticket in a lottery. If you buy it, you will almost certainly lose your money.
If truth is as worthless as you suggest, what should we replace it with?
Why should you replace that which is worthless? What should you do with a lottery ticket? If we were to search for compassion with the same intensity that we search for truth, perhaps we would live in a less violent world.
If there is no truth, does that mean that nothing is untrue, that nothing is false?
If nothing is pure white, does that mean that nothing is black? If falsity were dependent in meaning on truth, then perhaps there would be a problem. But it is not. Blackness and various shades of grey can be recognised regardless of whether pure white is possible. Falsity in all its forms and guises is recognisable even it we cannot describe what is absolutely not false. There is always error in description, in communication. There is error in all measurement. There is imprecision in all words. Our words are not the experience. And our experience is not the event we experienced. So even if the event has meaning, our knowledge of it is moot, is partial, is grasping at a straw that may not even exist. Again I say, in searching for truth you are grasping at power. The holders of truth have wrought so much havoc in this world. Far better you use your energies, and harvest the energies of others, to nurture compassion.
Dear friends,
The saddest lie is when we lie to ourselves about what we want to achieve in our lives.
When we lie to ourselves about our dreams.
Love
Sari
Thank you :o)
What about The Lie?
Shane.
I think that we live in a world of lies, more or less, but you always know for sure when you hear the truth… it became very rare and takes courage, but truth carries a special tone that reaches your senses and it may be spoken, it may be unspoken or just read from the eyes..
I like the way you expressed that, and I recognise what you are saying. It is as though the truth has an energy, a spirit that speaks to our hearts.
I think that there are lies which can give strenght to the person you’re talking to, and be the prelude to something that can really happen..for example telling someone which is depressed that I think he is strong and that can win his problems, even if inside me I think that that problem will be very difficult to solve can be helpful to find the strenght that everyone of us have. Sorry for my English I hope to make me understand.
Thank you Paulo for being here with us!
Greetings to everyone e un saluto particolare a Lina perchè sei italiana come me! Ciao
Thank you, Paulo, thank you all
for being inspiring.
warmth & trust
Most of us will say cheating is a lie. This poem might show another angle;
YESTERDAY, TODAY AND TOMORROW
‘I said to my friend,
“See her leaning over his arm?
Yesterday she leaned over my arm.”
And he said:
“Tomorrow she will lean over mine.”
And I said,
“See her sitting at his side:
And yesterday she sat at my side.”
and he said:
“Tomorrow she will sit at mine.”
And I said,
“Don’t you see her drinking from his
Cup?
And yesterday she sipped from mine.”
And he said:
“Tomorrow she will drink from mine.”
And I said,
“Look how she glances at him with eyes
full of love!
And with just such love, yesterday
she glanced at me.”
And he said,
“Tomorrow she will glance at me
likewise.”
And I said,
“Listen to her whispering songs of
love in his ears.
And yesterday she whispered the same songs
in mine.”
And he said:
“Tomorrow she will whisper them
in mine.”
And I said,
“Look at her embracing him: and yes-
terday she embraced me.”
And he said:
“Tomorrow she will lie in my arms.”
And I said,
“What a strange woman she is!!”
And he said:
“She is Life.”
(from The Treasured writings of Kahlil Gibran)
Beautiful …. and we must have patience as we live her. :-) Thank you Heart.
Hi, Heart.
Thank you for the best soul’s food by K. Gibran for good morning.
Hey Angel,
This is very beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing it here (:
Liza
Thank you ladies, you all have great taste :)
Dear Mr. Coelho and Friends,
What hurts the most is when people you love lie. They cannot be honest because no one wants to take responsibility.
I have been married to my ex-husband for 13 years. Out of the 13 years he cheated on me for 11 years (if not more). He led a dual life. Kept me for community purposes and the other woman for pleasure, I come from a big family of aunts, uncles, cousins who claimed to love me dearly, they all knew that he became an alcoholic and a druggie (no one said a word). He was my first love, I was blind, naive and unconditionally in love with him. He claimed that he traveled a lot and I never questioned it. I did not understand why one would lie and cheat. We have a son together, who he thought he must have because society rules.
I would like to share with all of you that it is my son and I who ended up with a short end of the stick. When I found out the facts, of course he never came home again. Would my ex-husband have been honest and told me that he no longer loves me and wants to part ways that would have been hurtful but I would have been much younger, would find someone who loves me and would have had more kids.
Now, almost three years have past, I have trust issues, with myself and the choices I made or will make. I want a relationship,however, I am scared to death that I and my son will be hurt again. Please don’t get me wrong, I know that my ex-husband came into my life for a reason, to teach me to be a woman that I am today and I love myself and my age (39). However this post is to show what lies can do to people. One doesn’t have to be direct and rude by stating facts, but just say it in a way that, that persons ego is not insulted in anyway. Thank you for reading.
Sincerely yours,
Larisa.
Larisa,
I thought that was simply put and to the point. My family too never says anything to my sister about her husband in the interests of keeping the peace. He is an alcoholic gambler, amongst other things. Your example makes me wonder how much we are really ‘keeping the peace’.
Rosa
Pienso que hay diferencias entre mentiras y esas “pautas sociales”..ejemplo no decir lo de “odio ese vestido” jajaja…son maneras sutiles de relacionarse con otros sin atentar tan directamente con sus egos, pero la mentira, esa que es destructiva, que te inventa una historia de vida completamente irreal, esa es la que sería completamente inaceptable…por eso catalógo como mentira aquello que pueda hacerte daño o aquello que llegue a cambiar tu perspectiva de la realidad
Dear Paulo,
I’d like to tell about my expirence. I don’t know if i’m living a lie, my wife left me with my kid about 5 months a go, I gave her everything I could, but every day she wants more. I lost my job and there’s when I saw I was living a lie, because I stopped giving her money, and every day we fought and she gets mad all day. I realized that she was in loved with my money and not in loved of me, so she left me and take everything with her. I was depressed, and one day I found a girl that I haven’t see for years. I always have been in love with her, but I never had the courage to tell her about my feelings, tell her how much I love her. I have been seen her almost every day, but I HAVENT TELL HER ABOUT MY PAST, ABOUT MY EXWIFE, and for that reason I also haven´t say how I feel about her. I’m so afraid to lose her ( yes I know that no one owns no one ), but I’m so scared, because every time I see her I feel Agape, it’s a feeling that I have never felt before. Is this a lie ??? What can I do ???
Thanks
I’m not Paulo so I hope you don’t mind me commenting but I would hate to see you miss an opportunity.
I think you need to take a chance on losing this person and letting them know that you love them. She may love you back, you never know and then you could have a life together – but if she doesn’t and she lets you know at least the truth will put you out of your misery. You’re only going to torture yourself, waiting and waiting.
Bem olá Paulo!!!
Eu vivo esse dilema
Contar ou não uma verdade.
As vezes a verdade dói, porém a mentira nos mata por dentro.
As vezes é muito melhor viver na ignorancia.
Sem conhecimento se há ou não verdades e mentiras.
Eu optei pela ignorancia, morrerei um pouco por dentro. A mentira tem pernas curtas talves um dia a ela me alcance.. e ai quem sabe a verdade já não doa tanto.
Mas se agente parar pensar não é a mentira ou a verdade o importante. Mas sim a atitude do outro em relação a certos assuntos.
bjus
I think that we don’t lie everytime because lies come out, always.
iI’ve been proved this thing on my skin in adelescence time, with my parents, with my boyfriend and with my work boss..
You can read a lie on my face because I don’t see you directly the other person;sometimes I laughing..so..
tell the truth is difficult;
accept the truth is difficult
but only in this way I think that the relationship between people can go on for life, almost in a love relationship.
thank you paulo for your post.
well, if a lie may help to save someone’s life I think is ok (I guess is the only occasion in which is allowed to lie for Buddhists monks)
I would say that the advice is always “common sense” If we lie about important things it will probably be worst later…and the lie will catch us somehow.
knowing the true is difficult anyway…:)
Your example is more about “sincerity” Paulo that speaking the truth. This is another subject. Sincerity is not always welcome and sometimes is better just not giving our opinion.
To tell a lie is different, more like telling a fact or change it or not telling about it (we can lie also by not telling the truth, or not saying anything)
Hello everyone,
In my opinion, a person should not lie at all. In the instance of a woman’s dress that is not flattering to see… we shouldn’t say it looks beautiful on her. We can always say negative things the other way around by jokingly say that she would look more beautiful in another colour, or if it’s not so revealing… but jokingly. That would surely deliver the message without much hurt.
I would never tolerate lies in anyway because lies will only hurt and damage y
Dear Paulo,
I’d like to write about my experience with lies. For a few years now I’m not telling lies. And I must say this makes my life much easier, not to have burden with me always, or to feel guilty about anything. I find this is just so pleasant to keep it this way.
In the past I have lied big times to someone about cheating. I was affraid to tell the truth. I thought this would be worse to know the truth. As a result (usually happens like that) the truth came out, it was even worse than I could ever imagine. My whole world has collapsed, many people turned away from me, and I became very depressed of what I did. I even emigrated to another country and started a new life to stop thinking of that episod.
The reson I lied was because I was ashamed of having these new feelings, I did not assume to break my engagements. I did not want to disappoint the person, or hurt any feelings. This was ridiculous.
Now with 3 years time lag, I’m still thinking of what I did, still have many dreams about it, and I know I will carry it with me still for a long time…maybe forever…but now my perception has changed, and I fully assume my feelings, I in fact can assume speaking all kind of topics now. Why should we be ashamed of? we’re human, and what makes us human ? it is our feelings…
Lying about a dress, I simply keep my opinion for myself. I think this won’t bring anything good to the person or myself. After all this is only my opinion…However if someone has -for example- something “hanging from his nose” or a dirty mouth, then I will mention it discretly, so the person won’t feel publicly ashamed.
Thank you for this blog, it is very interesting, enriching. I am learning a lot, opening my perception of things and people.
Love
Julie
La bugia è bugia, non c’è buona.Ma ho mentito anch’io, per il bene di mio figlio, perchè avesse il meglio dalla vita, per proteggerlo.L’ho fatto e lo rifarei solo per lui,per il resto del mondo non mi piace sporcarmi la coscienza.Anche io preferisco una brutta verità ad una bella bugia…perchè inevitabilmente si scoprono, o almeno, io le scopro, e mi sento tradita, e mi sembrerebbe di tradire la fiducia degli altri mentendo.Ho mentito per cercare di salvare la vita alla mia migliore amica, ma non è servito.E’ morta lo stesso…No, non è bello mentire.Non si fa agli altri quello che non vogliamo per noi.Ieri ero davanti a te Paulo, aspettavo che tornassi in sala…ma eri già andato via.Cn ammirazione ed affetto sincero.
Be blessed
Lina
Lügen? Schwindeln? Das muss jeder selbst entscheiden. Lügen sollte bzw. dürfte man nie, außer man hilft jemandem damit sehr und man kann es mit dem eigenen Gewissen vereinbaren. Z. B. in Kriegszeiten, wenn man Kriegsflüchtlinge verstecken will/muss und damit die Kriegstreiber evtl. anlügen muss. Also in Extremsituation bin ich für das Lügen. Aber bei uns in Deutschland gibt es ein Sprichwort: Lügen haben kurze Beine.
Irgendwann kommt die Wahrheit immer heraus!!!
Und nicht zu vergessen: Wer lügt braucht ein wahnsinnig gutes Gedächtnis ;-))
Greetings
Sanja
I would “lie” if asked direct questions by someone who was not minding their own business. I would answer “I don’t know” rather than just tell them it was none of their business. or maybe “I can’t help you with that”.
Big difference between a lie and keeping your thoughts to your self I think too.. Just blurting out that the dress is ugly would be seriously bad form. But if asked “what’s your honest opinion, does this suit me or not” I think the person has trusted you, so the least you can do is answer honestly.
With love, Daniel
The truth is relative. Univoc reality does not exist,so we say the truth (or lie,as you want) in every moment of our days.
The most important thing is choosing THAT reality,that truth that make us and people that we love happy,because is thanks that things sayed that we develope our life,and in particular,our happiness.
The girlfriend works for me in Thai massage centre, as consequence communicates with men, in most cases , they are married. And so, from her stories, I have understood, that all of them tell lies to the wives.Dont know why,but after marriage between the man and the woman frequently grows a wall, it is easier to it him to tell lies than to share feelings, and frequently at them simply there is no boldness to admit to the wife, that the love was terminated.
Excuse for awful English.
Lisa, Russia
Lisa,
Your English is quite good, keep practicing. I understand what you mean to say.
And I agree with what you said, I too think fear keeps us from telling the truth many times, especially in relationships.
Paula
I guess.. telling truth always is not correct. Like for the dress example, by saying that “You dress is not good” .. will only end up making a bad evening for that person.
So, in short, me and that person dint earn anything except the sadness incurred by other ..
So, one may not lie. but, truth always is not good. There are different yardsticks for different situations.
Open for discussion.
I feel that lately I’ve been lying as a way to help encourage. I feel that if I don’t lie that certain friends of mine will not find their true potential. Maybe if I lie to them about how good they are at something they will keep at their dreams and maybe one day achieve what they thought they already had. Is this wrong? Because it feels right
To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.
William Shakespeare
Sorry I wanted to answer to the comment about the word “angel” and “Angle”: it’s very interesting, and tells us about the Power of Words … At the begininng there was the Word, and the Word was by God and the Word was God (the beginning of Bible).
love
Chris
It’s true and beutiful at the same time. Ancient greeks said “kalos kai agathos” (beautiful and good).
It reminded me about the song of Robbie Williams “Angels”
“she offers me protection, a lot of love and affection, whether I’m right or wrong”.
Love.
Chris
Chris,
Maybe, that is because love is an action and a decision we make not just an emotion/ feeling. It is more a gift we give to others by our actions, and that makes their life and ours good and beautiful.
I also feel those actions must be genuine and from the heart not out of duty or expectation to be valuable and lovable like a gift given sincerely. That is what love is for me and truth fits into that perfectly for me. I feel words are powerful tools…….or weapons depending how you use them.
Paula
i admit that i tell lies. white lies, dark lies, whatever you call it, it is still a lie. and i don’t think a man can extract himself from doing lies. but he/she can try to refrain from doing it.
though i think one must not judge the other that he/she is bad or very bad even he/she tells a big lie. here is a quote that i will share to all of you, “First, be suspicious, and then find the reason for the lies. And the truth lies there. What’s important is the cause and effect. Don’t be deceived by actions, read their hearts.”
This is the messages come from the middle of the Truth.
“All things under the sun head for itself’s perfection.” This is the only true. The rest is the phenomenon of harmony or the phenomenon of disharmony caused by relation between the only truth and another inessencial monster. For heading for oneself’s perfection, we all should scatter fears by advancing through mist. All negative against others emotions under the sun come from fears. Every time we are able to choose whether heading for oneself’s perfection or whether choosing fear . Advance or retreat depends on the choosing ability of oneself. The spirit under oneself’s heart don’t want a division. For heading for the perfection, oneself with the spirit should remain in harmony.
To be harmonized, it is possible when oneself remains in the highest good. From a microbe or an object to human, there is unique universe in each single world. The height good is to respect universal existences as existence itself. Respect comes from belief.
In this virgin forest, an indivisual stands as a high each single tree independently.
Existence doesn’t harm each other’s existence. The sound within the virgin forest echoes. Just mixing sound by sound. For heading for oneself’s perfection, an indivisual should perceive what the indivisual wants from the bottom of one’s heart. The most important thing is that self’s appearance from the source is needed to revive. This is the first thing to do.
The under images is so beautiful and the most grand scene.
That is:
When an indivisual is advancing toward what an indivisual truly wants, other peoples in society around an indivisual scatter and make the way. Repeatly, when another indivisual is advancing toward what an indivisual truly wants, other peoples in society around an indivisual scatter and make the way.
When we go toward all different dreams each other, when we go toward an indivisual’s true dream, we are able to make colorful appearance’s beautiful society futher world.
When all people goes forward oneself’s dream, we all in the world are able to produce various flowers and fruits.
There is a scene on “Do away with all superstitions.”
“River of the Truth” which give a perfect recognition system to human is flowing at the place beyond transcending nation, race, culture, tration. There, with the Light.
There is flowing images about a value system. For example, belief, sincerity, courage etc. Recognition of a value system is an ability of understanding and analyzing on the world. A value system of the world providing the perfect form is floating like air around our world.
What an indivisual feels lack of recognition is the reason that the indivisual don’t possess a recognition system perfectly. While living a life, most people live by accepting just a part of this value system or a little more part of its. In such a meaning, the value system of our world already perfects. So, world is like a code mass waiting interpretated by words within an indivisual.
The object to achieve from an indivisual’s birth to the indivisual’s death is to go forward what the indivisual truly wants, with analyzing and understanding of value system. An indivisual needs to achieve the upper all things through the whole life.
By the time all stories finish, the last story is the following. :
That is a message on charity.
Hold a fallen person’s hand next to oneself within a family, at work futher a society, anywhere! Not for person refusing your holding hands but for a fallen person, hold their hands.
That is a message on an each unit community based on love. Love is the universal eye embrassing the whole of each unit as family, work, school etc. Love provides a point of view of universe wherever an indivisual is. World is a huge one based on love, the only true Light.
Child of the Light watches and hears another contents and image after River of the Truth flows under the child of Light’s feet.
That is:
When Moses’ stick tapped the water, the lapping water is divided in two, and then “Go forward. Go forward. Go forward.”
“There is faith, hope, and charity. And the grearest of them is charity.”
“Seek, then you’ll seek. Find, then you’ll find. Knock, then it’ll open.”
“Though your beginning is small, your latter days will be very great.”
From River of the Truth
Supia,
Wonderful! You have captured, in the current, the way mankind could be if he lives the simple teachings of the River of Truth. Thank you for your beautiful thoughts.
Love and warmth,
Laninee
Namaste, Elaine.
Thank you for your wonderful mind, Elaine.
I saw River of the Truth like crystalline water.
This is one of last week’s comments written by Korean.
with warmheart
Supia
Hi folks
interesting topic and if understood correctly quite liberating too ! why liberating, one may ask ? liberating becuase it can take away a lot of pain of existnace from the lives of wols.
is anyone aware if Zesus ever lied ! if buddha ever lied !
i am writing a short pice for this topic and that i want to edit before burdening u with, the above questions will help in writing that piece ( less than three paras ! )
love
aditya
Dear Aditya,
noone of them lied, but i don’t understand what you are trying to say.Please would you elaborate on that?
Hi Aditya,
Great question! If it is true Jesus was married and had a child with St Mary Magdalene, He lied..or at least was deceptive, or the Church was.
Love and Admiration,
Heart
Dear Aditya,
I understand your questioning.Further to your post, I looked on Wikipedia at link on New Testament. I could determined that there are a lot of hypotheses and not enough certainty !
http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nouveau_Testament
http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qu%C3%AAtes_du_J%C3%A9sus_historique
Thank you for your post, he allowed me to deepen question :)
Light & Love,
Hi, aditya.
Thank you for your mention on Jesus and Budda.
I’m serious now. Why do follow people Jesus and Budda without any doubt?
People seem to like more far far myths than close miracle.
with warmheart
Supia
Hi, Aditya
Believe me!
There is nowhere the Truth. The only path toward truth exists only in you. Human CAN perceive the truth. I wrote about floating scenes I had seen at that moment contacting with the truth.
I really want to help others. Believe me! And I really wash you read the very above my comment.
Love,
Supia
Thank you for your reply, aditya.
Good Luck,
Supia
In this situations, I think we should tell the beauty part of the real. Everything is beauty and we can see it in everything. The real has many parts. But we can offer the most beautiful thing.
Paulo:
I was having a conversation with a guy talking about this diet supplement , and I comment ” fat people wants to loose weight”he interruped me and said, “excuse me you can’t say fat people,it’s not politically correct , you have to say overweight people”. I am like “what ?is it the same?
I’ve learn here in the States everything have to be “politically correct”. For me that is “lying” .
Why not saying the things the way they are. For me the fact of having the perfect sentence for each situation is bullsh…. Sorry about my language but you can’t hide the truth. Is even more stupid trying to cover it. I call the thing by their names. of course I am not going to hurt anybodies feelings and tell them “you are a fat cow”, no !! I am sensitive person. But …Do we have to lie between friends too? associates?I’m already acting when I am working and don’t want to become one of the characters I play on TV.( the entertaintment business is already a big lie)
YEs . we have to ( an inner voice is telling me that) i breath in and out and then I think, As one of my teachers said to me. “laura, not everybody wants to know the truth”.
laura ! hi !
yes this ploitically correct business is quite stupifying at times, i am not a political person and so i don’t expect myself to be politically correct most of the times.
having said this, truth needs to be deleivred with compassion otherwise it’s just an ego trip. and one more thing, once u know that u are acting when u are working,then better be a great actress too, ain’t it. forget if nobody wnats the truth ( sadly it’s true for 99.99% people, happy as we are in our illusions ), u wnat to know the thruth, and that is why u keep on sharing your present ‘truth’. that tecaher should have said “laura, not everbody wants to know the truth, but that should not deter u from sharing your truth, only don’t be fanatic about it”
love
aditya
even here in my country, philippines, politician likes to use “politically correct terms” especially when election is near. “squatters” become “informal settlers”. after election, they will call them again “squatters”.
oh, i would also like to post it here since the topic is all about “lies”…this was just a repost from bob ong, a well-known author here in our country…
A man died and went to heaven as he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates; he saw a huge wall of clocks behind St. Peter.
He asked, “What are all those clocks?”
Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.”
“Oh,” said the man, “whose clock is that?”
“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”
“Incredible, ” said the man”. And whose clock is that one?”
St. Peter responded, “That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire Life.”
“Where’s Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo’s clock?” asked the man.
“Gloria’s clock is in Jesus’ office. He’s using it as a ceiling fan.”
*gloria is our current president
Dear Laura,
behalf of all the fat people, i want to thank you for being so sensitive for not calling us fat cows, we appreciate the thought though!
Your teacher was right not all people want to know the truth, but maybe he was reffering to your point of truth.
Laura, what i love about Australia is that here, we can say it what it really is..When I went there in America few years ago, I used the word ‘toilet’ for toilet…But over there, the ‘right’ word to use is ‘bathroom’…Here in Australia, toilet is a toilet and bathroom is a bathroom…
In my job, I see fat women all the time and they themselves use the word fat..But I find it hard sometimes to find words to use when describing their figures as we discuss what style of outfits would suit them…But I am always truthful with them and say it as it is..Fortunatley, i can also use sketching to discuss what would make them look taller or slimmer …I usually don’t need to use true words that may offend any some of them..;)…
if you will tell the truth the other person will receive honesty and with that you will help the other person for him/her to improve hiself/herself.
its kinda awkward.
but atleast you won’t have the baggage of saying a lie.
Hey,
If you want to see what happens when a liar gets caught, watch this youtube video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3sX30NubTs
Love and scratches,
Lainee
Hi, elaine
So So funny thing! From beginning to end, it made me laugh!
NO NO NO……me i’m that kind of person, who would more appreciate someone to tell me even if my dress doesn’t look good! mean it’s better to hear it from someone closer than from someone outside (it’ll hurt less), but at the end, even if it tell me someone outside, the choice is on me, how i am going to accept it & take it.
i think the bigger problem here is cause lot of people are weak and can’t handle the truth the way it is, but on the other side going and talking how they love honesty – that’s pathetic! because if we keep on like this, we’ll just make chaos. 1 will say for me is ok to lie about this, 2nd about that and etc. where will be the end? nowhere!!!! mean our society is already working like that, so i’m deffinetly down for changes……MORE HONESTY!!!!
I think it is ok to tell your opinion.
I don´t like it if people pretend that they for example like my dress, because I can sense that this is not what they think. If they say nothing I can still sense what they think or feel. I think we all sense what others think we are all connected. So it feels very bad to me when people are not honest. And if it hurts it is my problem. Because it is me making an interpretation of what the other person just told me. So I am hurting myself by believing my thoughts. It is my decision to believe my thoughts or not. Reality is kind. And if it hurts I can use it to work with it for my own best and growth. So I can thank the person that hurts me. Sometimes it takes time to see the benefit of others being honest.
“세상 만물은 그 완전함을 지향한다.”
세상에서 일어나는 모든 일은 이 한 가지 진실과
그 진실에 연관된 또 다른 실체 없는 괴물 사이에서 일어나는
조화와 부조화의 현상이다.
완전함을 지향하기 위해서는 안개를 헤치고 나아가듯
두려움을 걷어내야 한다.
존재하는 모든 부정적인 감정들은 오로지 이 한 가지에서 출발한다는 건
놀랍다. 매순간 우리는 선택할 수 있다.
자신의 완전함을 지향할지, 두려움을 선택할지는
각자의 몫이다.
마음은 분열을 원하지 않는다.
완전함을 지향하기 위해서는 조화로움 속에서 있어야 한다.
조화로움 속에 있기 위해서는 최고의 선 위에서만 가능하다.
미생물이나 사물에서부터 인간에 이르기까지
그 속엔 하나의 우주가 있다.
최고의 선이란 저마다의 우주적 존재를 존재 자체로 존중하는 것.
존중이라는 건 믿음에서 나온다.
이 숲에서 개인은 우뚝 선 개개의 나무로 서 있다.
서로의 존재를 해하지 않는다.
음향이 울려 퍼진다.
음향은 섞일 수 있을 뿐.
완전함을 지향하기 위해서는 자기가 진정 원하는 것이 무엇인지 아는 것,
자아의 본모습을 되살리는 것… 이것이 최우선 되어야 한다.
그리고
아래 꿈을 향해 나아가는 영상은 아름답고 가장 인상적인 장면이었습니다.
그것은 한 개인이 자신이 진정 원하는 것을 위해 나아갈 때 그 주변의
사람들이 길을 터주고 흩어지는 장면이 너무나 아름답게 펼쳐졌습니다.
그리고 또 다른 사람이 자신의 꿈을 향해 나아갈 때 그 주변의 사람들이
길을 열어 주는 장면이 다시 펼쳐졌고, 우리가 서로 모두 다른 꿈을 향 해 나아갈 때,
진정한 자신의 꿈을 향해 나아갈 때 다양한 모습의 아름다운 사회가 될
수 있습니다.
진정한 자신의 꿈을 향해 나아갈 때 우리 모두 다양한 꽃과 열매를 맺을
수 있습니다.
미신을 떨치라는 장면이 있었습니다.
국가, 민족, 인종, 문화, 전통을 초월한 곳에 인간에게 완전한 인식체계
를 알려 주는 진리의 강이 흐르고 있으며, 빛만이 가득한 빛의 세계가 있니다. 그리고 믿음이 무엇인지, 성실이 무엇인지 여러 가지 가치 체계들에 대한 이미지가 한동안 전개되었습니다. 가치 체계에 대한 장면은 세상을 바라보고 분석하고 이해하는 능력이었습니다.
세계의 가치 체계는 어느 것 하나 부족할 것 없이 완벽한 형태를 갖추며
우리 주변 세계를 공기처럼 떠다니고 있습니다. 부족하다고 느끼는 것은
개인이 인식 체계를 완전하게 갖추지 못해서일 뿐.
우리는 이 가치 체계 중 극히 일부를, 혹은 조금 더 많은 부분을 자신의 인식 체계로 받아 들이며 살고 있을 뿐이었습니다.
그런 의미에서 세계의 가치 체계는 이미 완벽하며, 세계가 만들어진 이 래 하늘 아래 어느 것 하나 새로운 것은 없었습니다. 가치체계에 대한 이미지가 펼쳐지는 동안 세상은 언어로 해석되어지길 기다리는 거대한 암호 덩어리와도 같다는 걸 알게 되었습니다.
한 개인이 태어나서 죽을 때까지 이루어져야 할 일은 가치 체계에 대한 분
석과 이해를 가지고 자신이 진정 원하는 것을 위해 나아가라는 것이었습니다. 이 모든 것이 한 개인 안에서 이루어져야할 일이었습니다.
모든 이야기가 끝나갈 무렵,
맨마지막 이미지는 에 대한 것이었습니다.
스스로 자처해서 고립되어 있는 사람, 손을 잡기를 거절하는 사람에게는
굳이 손을 내밀지 않아도 되지만,
그 곳이 어느 곳이든, 넘어져 있는 사람에게, 슬픔 속에서 사랑을 기다리
며, 사랑을 원하고, 사랑이 필요한 사람에게 사랑의 손을 내밀어 잡아주
라는 메시지였습니다.
한 개인이 서 있는 곳이 어느 곳이든, 가족이든 직장이든
자신이 서 있는 곳에서 우리 모두 넘어져 있는 옆사람을 일으켜 주는 모습
은 사랑에 바탕을 둔 공동체 사회에 대한 것이었습니다.
이 모든 것을 감싸는 것이 바로 사랑이었습니다.
사랑은 자신이 있는 곳에서 전체를 볼 수 있는 눈이었습니다.
세상은 영원한 빛이자, 사랑에 바탕을 둔 거대한 하나입니다.
* 만물은 자신만의 노래를 하고 있습니다.
이것은 빛의 아이 주변에서 펼쳐지던 이미지와 이야기들의 가장 주된 내용입니다.
그것은 많은 내용이었지만, 핵심 메시지는 이것입니다.
이것과 함께, 세상의 가치 체계, 전통이 무엇인지, 미신이 무엇인지 등등 많은 이야기들이 전개되었고,
그 모든 것들이 모여 크리스탈처럼 반짝이는 강물이 되어 빛의 아이의 발 아래로 유유히 흐르는 것을 보았답니다.
그리고, 빛의 아이가 그것이 이라고 느끼는 것을
밖에서 바라보는 육체의 내가 다시 생각하는 완전한 이원적 차원으로 생각하고 느낄 수 있었답니다.
그것은 두려움을 걷어 내고, 자신이 진정 원하는 것을 위해 나아가라는 것이었습니다.
한 개인이 자신이 원하는 것을 향해 나아갈 때 그 꿈을 향해 나아가는 사람을 막아서지 말고, 그 사람을 위해 길을 비켜주는 것이었습니다.
서로가 다양한 꿈을 꾸어야 세상은 풍요로워집니다.
물론, 선택은 각자의 몫입니다. 그것은 각자 가슴 안에 있는 신께 물어 볼 일입니다.
우리는 모두 서로 다른 선택을 할 수 있고, 서로 다른 선택은 각자의 완전함을 지향하기 위해 각자가 알아서 선택해야 할 스스로의 몫입니다.
그것은 고정된 한 가지 이미지나 사회가 조장하는 좋은 대학, 좋은 직장과 같은 한 가지 길에 있지 않습니다. 이 기준은 문화, 전통마다 달라지지만, 영원한 빛은 인종, 문화, 전통 등 이 모든 것을 초월해 있습니다.
특정 기호는 인식을 하지 않는 것 같군요. 특정 기호 안의 글들이 지워졌습니다.빠진 부분은 “모든 이야기가 끝나갈 무렵, 맨 마지막 이야기는 “사랑”에 대한 것이었습니다.” 그리고 “이것은 빛의 의식이 시작되자 마자, 진리의 한가운데서 본 이야기들입니다.”
i wish I can read this ;) ..
Dear, hazel v.
Thank you for your concerning.
I wrote it in English in the a little above.
Love,
Supia
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyMC5U3Ipmk
True – Spandau Ballet
So true
Funny how it seems
Always in time, but never in line for dreams
Head over heels, when toe to toe
This is the sound of my soul
This is the sound
I bought a ticket to the world
But now I’ve come back again
Why do I find it hard to write the next line
Oh I want the truth to be said
I know this much is true
With a thrill in my head and a pill on my tongue
Dissolve the nerves that have just begun
Listening to Marvin (all night long)
This is the sound of my soul
This is the sound….
Always slipping from my hands
Sand’s a time of its own
Take your seaside arms and write the next line
Oh I want the truth to be known
I know this much is true (x2)
I bought a ticket to the world
But now I’ve come back again
Why do I find it hard to write the next line
Oh I want the truth to be said
I know this much is true (x2)
This much is true
I know this much is true
~*~*~*~
This is the sound of my soul,
this is the sound…
Oh, I know I know I know this much is trueee…
Love,
Liina
Paulo, I think, that one person can lie another when he wish well to him. When he don’t want to upset him. Sometimes it isn’t important another person to know you’re lie or not. It concerns only those cases when the person wishes well to the near. In the other cases I supposed we must tell the truth. Because sometimes the person doesn’t see some of his mistakes. And truth can help to understand the mistake. And to become better.
“You don’t know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer; but that ain’t no matter. That book was made by Mr. Mark Twain, and he told the truth, mainly. There was things which he stretched, but mainly he told the truth…” Huck Finn gets it exactly right in the frist sentences of his adventures. To tell the truth, as a writer, you often need to go beyond the simple facts of what actually happened.
I love Mark Twain ;)…
Saying your opinion and lying is completely different.
Lies….noooo! I don’t like your dress? Ok, i tell you, no problems…but I know that I can have in front of me different persons…so I tell them in a different way.
Lies…passing time…can be much pericoulous for future comunication with that persons you told a lie :-)…even if lies are little or simple.
No Paulo I don’t agree…truth always.
I would be lying if i said i did not feel nervous for tomorrow’s interview
;o)
best of luck ! what interview ??
love
aditya
Good luck Catherine and what the strength is in you…:)
good luck, I’m sure you’ll knock their socks off!
All the best!…
I use to say nothing instead of telling a lie.
I must admit that i find it difficult to say nothing so I have upset many people in the past because i tell the truth instead of saying “no comment”…
Like Paulo said, I also think we should tell the truth though it hurts sometimes..But one thing i know for sure is… it is really true that the truth will set us free ;)…
I may lie to my friends when I know they are putting themselves out there to search for their life and they come to me because they have a sudden doubts/fear about themselves or the path they chose to take. I don’t knwo where their life is going to lead them or where they are goign to lead their life; all I know is that I just have to give positive support even I don’t know.
Dear Paul,
that’s all the fun why spoil it? A little playfull flirt never hurted anyone as far as i know.
Besides this kind of women are the most interesting, attractive by men and charming.
Dear Paul,
in Greece we call “witches”, in a good way,the playfull and seductive women.
Something tells me that is not so easy -as you claim-for a witch to steal your heart.
You are too mysterious for a translucent person.
Witn one more mysterious smile.
Sometimes on Monday I look at the new question and answer with what comes to me. It’s Tuesday and in reading some of the responses, what comes to me is, what’s most important is not to lie to yourself, to constantly be searching for the answers, asking the questions, in order to find your own truth. To know when you’re lying to yourself, then to ask why? I look at children, the childlike qualities and the childish, childish is lying to get your way, to not get punished, to do what you want to do without consequences. Too many of us have lost our childlike qualities and retained our childish, the world is being run by a lot of childish people, not childlike, which would enhance humanity, childlike versus childish.
The truth is what we believe in, the situation and universal dimention we feel that we belong to, wherein we see and feel our selves, today and tomorrow, outside the time zone. What we say is mostly not connected to any truth, not our own or others. Neither what we think,and what we feel is mostly manipulated by our thoughts. Words would not hurt if we were all living the truth! Words are just a fragment of a lie, and a framment of the truth.
Writings should be read and most probably better off not being said, so they will not be heared of as a lie or as a thruth, only a wealth of knowledge, that we can do with what we want, that can make us travel out for search for enlightening dimensions.
i can’t be realived if someone lied to me. many people have done that but i can feel the lie and i am not happy because i have to deal with two things instead of one the lie itself and knowing why this person is liying to me.
just tell the truth, maybe it will hurt in the first moment but we can get over it with time, the betrayal is the thing that we can’t get over it.
and about the dress paulo just don’t tell anything or say the part that you liked about it, it means saying a partial truth not a lie… truth is the thing that we need the most in tis world.
I agree Madonna, I can sometimes sense when a person is not quite telling the truth and then you start to think about that.
For several months, I have been battling with the question ” When is a lie justified?”
My daughter-in-law’s mother died recently, maybe because of a lie!
She had been ill for some time and finally went to a Doctor to do some tests. They showed that she had a large ovarian tumour, but the family told her that she only had a small gall stone because she was so afraid of operations. They sent me to see a well known Consultant for a second opinion. He said that there was no sign of any malignancy but should operate immediately to remove the tumour, do a biopsy, and therefore give her a good chance of survival. The family refused. I said it was her body and she had the right to choose for herself.
After that, she gradually went downhill and within 2 months tests showed that cancer had spread all over her body. She died a slow, agonizing death. Really she lived a hell on earth.
Was this lie justified? I don’t think so, but maybe I am wrong? All I know is, that my daughter-in-law and her brothers and sisters lost their mother and my granddaughters lost their dear Grandma.
So the Consultant said it wasn’t malignant but it ended up that it was?
You’re right. Sometimes it hurts people to tell them the truth, but it can hurt worse not to. Sometimes you can’t avoid pain.
Dear Theresa
Cancer is such an awful disease, and ovarian cancer kills so many women. They call it the “silent” killer because it is so hard to detect, and usually by the time it is detected it is too late. This happened to someone else I know. She too had a lump, had been going to the Doctors for years, was finally sent for tests and it revealed a huge tumour, it was removed, she suffered hugely, was given the all clear after two years of horrific pain, and then literally the next week after being given the all clear, went down hill and was dead within a month (it had gone to her body). Her family were absolutely devastated.
I wonder why your friends her family felt that she, the Mother couldn’t make decisions for herself initially, or why the Doctors didn’t talk to her directly, it sounds odd. Even when someone is sick, unless they are totally physically incapable of making a decision, have that right.
Having seen my own Mother go through two operations and horrific suffering, to only then die herself of another type of cancer four months later, I do not know what I would do.
Love
Pandora
Dear Theresa, for a worker in the medical field I know that this is one of the most difficult moral questions that one can face.
There are different opinions of how to behave in such situation.
However, I believe that each case has its conditions that have to be dealt with individually.
But it is always a very hard decision to make.
Love
Tarek
Paulo I want to say (before anything) that I love you! Like I love my best friend, my sister, my husband….I just have to tell you this.
About you question, you can lie in case like this (as you mencioned), the true is if you only say the true you won’t rest until lunch time.
I don’t really like the word “Lie”. I prefer falsify. I know that everyone lies in some form or another. I think if it makes you feel really bad then it was a mistake to lie. People can really overeact about the simplist things say for instance with my mother. Everything is ok mom! Just until I get more facts on the situation. Moms can freak out over thi tiniest things. I take care of elderly people that have dementia or Alzheimers disease. Now if they really beleive that their husband is still alive am I going to tell them the truth or lie. Lie because in this circumstance they will relive loosing their husband over and over again. I think the most important thing is NOT to lie to yourself. You have to be honest with yourself at all times. I know this from many mistakes in my young life. Now 32 years old I have witnessed the punishments when you lie to yourself.
A good example Tiffany. These are cases of when a white lie can soothe through a situation.
Paolo
This world is full of lies and it is very difficult to be with the truth . One who does that assumes cult status like Buddha , Gandhi or the elder brother of Pandavas from Indian Epic Mahabharata.
Also what is true to you may not be true to others .
This dilemna what is a lie is most important .Hence It is important to be true to ourself .
We often live for our image and not for ourselves and that is the greatest lie where we are challenged .
Also lies are so convienent for us at times we fail to distinguish the real reason of resorting to lies and assume it as a truth .
There is a way of communicating right feedback without resorting to lies . This is difficult and needs practise.
Hence to me a lie is a lie and we all have been lieing and disguise it as a comfortable truth.
Regards
Jayanta
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