“Surrealism” is to have 20.000 friends in Facebook&Twitter, but your phone doesn’t ring during the weekend.
P.S. I am not talking about me, but about the society as I see it today (BTW I have more than that in T and FB)
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Unfortinately people prefer to build the relationships through computer more and more.i see less and less “real” friends not “net” friends. I do hope it will change and we will hade distant friends only aster we meet in real life.
Alla
http://www.allasobirova.com
i say that people dont know to comunicate this days, you see is easier to spy in others life insted of looking some one in the face…. sad…
the people are diferend from the other animals cause they kan comunicate…
LOL! What smugness Paulo! Its like “I have more then 20000 beat that!” and “Obviosly MY* phone rings on weekends. Ah I’m so popular” Hehe.
Anyways. Maybe its just a shift in communications. Like people used to first meet face to face always. Emotion could be gauged from their faces, voice, expression, eyes, words, body language, action and ‘presence’ as in aura or something similar.
Then came the telephone. All went down to the voice, tone and words. So many things like eyes, body language, expression and the ‘presence’. It was void of so many things.
Right now this. Digital media. Void of everthing! Only words. Tone has to be mentioned like ‘LOL’ if you’re jesting. ‘Yeah right’ for sarcasm. ‘Whatever’ to condescend. And the emoticons!! [ =) :P :) :( ] No presence nothing! Worst form of communication possible. Yet its convennient and Free!
It certainly has a plethora of advantages like this. Me communicating to you, Paulo and you friends- all the international readers. It certainly would have been next to impossible for me to meet you or even ring you on weekends ;)
Who knows the next form of communication could me some thought machine! Sheer thoughts conveyed to the other. Who knows…
So lets keep the face-to-face communication reserved for everyone we can meet-friends family etc. The telephonic one for faraway people-relatives friends in different city nation. And digital for communications like this.
oh! dis reminds me of drew berrymore’s role in ‘He’s just not that into you’, she too had said the same thing…….
& you know it was wonderful whn @ da end she deletes all those accounts on networking sites after findin her mr. right!
Life indeed has bcome a joke!!! if v look @ technology though itz gud but it kills the fun of being human!!!
May I remind you all dears that before the telephon was the mail?;)
Normal, paper mail.
The difference here is that it is so fast, inmediate, and we expect inmediate answers and so on… And thus people don’t spend much time writing because nothing happened really in their “real” day to day life since the last email/message/sms.
In between, I don’t have 20 000 friends on facebook, not even 100, but they are people I truly care for and know and share with;)
Yet sometimes my phone doesn’t ring during the week end, or just once maybe; it’s ok because I’m not available, I’m doing things, and so are my beloved ones;)
I wonder why sometimes it seems easier to connect with people or even to be open to show our deepest emotions or feelings on a blog than face to face… Are we that unconscious? Or do we really need a screen in front of us to reveal our true colors?
Grettel,
I think it is a lot easier to talk about our real person with people who don’t really know us. There is always the fear of rejection or being judged. So I think you are right.
la gente tiene demasiado miedo, pero el miedo solamente se cura con amor a los demas, yo creo que a veces hay demasiados intereses emocionales que al final no van a ninguna parte, pero nos hacen acturar de manera diferente, la sencillez es la unica garantia de sinceridad,..
Now there is more than a thousand people already who want to come to Paulo’s march party this quote next to it suddenly changes it’s meaning.
It makes me think of last weekend when i biked down to the photomuseum with my daughter because one of her favorite sesamestreet actors was there to sign the catalogue of the exhibition about the ‘Wonderyears’, – growing up in the 50th – he had been co-designing. They had stood chatting about scarfs and hats and my girl has been leafing through the catalogue ever since, last night i heard her mumble: he’s so nice, and i smiled. Thank god famous people are so nice, make us feel so at ease. It makes us forget how many of us there actually is. It is frightening somehow to think of all these people who all have feelings similar to mine. Or maybe it is only impressive to some of you, but to me it feels threatening in a way, as if it’s decimising me, making me insignificant in a way i had not felt insignificant before. It’s familiarity that does that: just think of how well you know Michael Jacksons family, their names, their history, their succes and their low moments. Look at how well you know people who have no idea you yourself even walk this earth. It is amazing what effect media have on us.
Yesterday i still sort of raised my eyebrows at 20.000 friends and thought nothing much of it. Today i read some thousand dates of birth, peoples favorite music, books and they are not a number anymore, but people with at least 3 things in common: we dream of being invited, we read, and we like music.
Just now i was standing drying the dishes with a cloth that had initals embroidered in the corner in red threat. My great great grandmother Maartjes linnens that have survived not only her but my grandma too, whom i inherited them from. Noone but me on this earth still knows she ever even existed, and now i wonder: isn’t it a little like with these 4 question testimonials?
Of course you all exist!
you all have your life right here and now and since your in the middle of it it is the only life on this earth that really matters to you. Or at least i suppose so, as it is like that for me.
But we all have that same feeling, haven’t we,
And people before us had that too: not only Maartje.
Last year i walked around an old roman monument in the south of France. My legs were torn by the bloody thorny shrub and my knees and shorts were sandy from sliding down the hill and for a little while it felt as if i was the first person in very long to be so close to the Pont du Gard. Until i actually stood on it. And saw how the stones were literally blistered with graffity. People who must have felt rather like me after a long hot walk decided to leave their mark: make sure they themselves and the day they climbed the aquaduct would not be forgotten.
It is a good thing famous people are so kind and open because it hides the fact how many friends they have and how big this world actually is.
(i have 6 friends and 4 family members on facebook and suddenly that feels quite different too.)
Give me your phone, i will call you :-)
big hug,
¡Hola! Mi nombre es Silvia Carballo Argumedo tengo 50 años y soy prfesora jubilada, madre de 2 lindas hijas Verónica mi primogénita y Diana; Vero Ingeniero Qimico Industrial egresada del I.P.N. en 2006 con 23 años de edad féliz, triunfadora, muy guapa, enamorada, orgullosa de su familia y podría decir mil cosas que retrataran a mi hija solo se que era muy feliz ella fallecio el 10 de enero pasado en un accidente automovilistico ella viajaba con su novio a Morelia, y escribo para usted porque era su autor favorito, leia sus articulos y de vez en vez nos regalaba en casa algo de lo que para ella significaba leer a su autor favorito. Hace poco tiempo me encontre con un libro Verónica decide morir, y pense si esta no sera una señal… En fin quiero agradecer que mi hija aprendiera tanto leyendo a Paulo Coelho.
Querida Silvia
Lamento mucho lo que sucedio con Vero. Soy de Peru, tengo 19 años y tus lineas llamaron mi atencion.
Tengo una madre que diria exactamente lo mismo de mi, y eso me hace feliz. No necesito conocerte para saber que tu hija era feliz gracias a ti, porque una madre que se interesa por la lectura de su hija es porque quiere conocer su mundo, y eso hace feliz a una hija.
Los libros son muy buenos, a mi tambien me encantan, disfruto cada uno, cada palabra, y algunas veces me detengo unos segundos para tratar de encontrar el fondo de una frase o de alguna situacion que se presenta. Ojala tu tambien puedas disfrutar leyendo Coelho y conociendo un poco mas el mundo de Veronica.
Un abrazo muy fuerte y desde lo mas profundo de mi corazon te deseo lo mejor.
kimberly
hola soy Carlos de Villa de las Flores amigo de tu hermana Dora, amigo también de Hector Carrillo, navegando en internet me encontre con este blog y vi tu mensaje, lamento mucho lo sucedido, quisiera ponerme e contacto con tu hermana Dora aqui te dejo un mail de mi sobrina espero seguir en contacto saludos a tu familia.
Paulo, I already told you, give me a call and we can have a cup of coffee. Don’t worry about your phone ringing then…talk to you later, send my best to your wife and my best to you. RC
So true or not? That is the question! And the answer is different to each of us, as we do have different realities, experiences and expectations.
There are those who just collect faces on facebook/twiter, the more they have the better they feel… as it shows to others and themselves how “popular” they are. If that make them happy so be it.
There are those who use it to get in touch with people they have not seen in a long time – school mates, friends from the past and other places. They are happy to share their pictures and life, even though they hardly talk or communicate. For them it is enough just to pip on their friends profile and c how are they doing. If that make them happy, so be it.
Then there are the ones that use it because everybody else is doing so, therefore after being harassed by everybody around them – because they “are not on facebook/twiter!” – they finally open an account, which will be hardly used. They just answer a few friend request and ignored all the rest.
Some people use it to remember their friends and family birthdays, which makes everybody happy, as even people who you have not seen in years, did take a minute to write you a Happy Birthday post.
There are others who like to post on their status an inspirational note every morning – a way to share with anyone who is ready to received and get inspired. They just do it for the simple pleasure of sharing something, with no expectations. To their surprise later on they discovered that many of his/her friends are actually looking forward to start their day by reading the note he/she is religiously posting. Even if he/she has inspired 1 friend out of the 20,000, he/she knows it was worthy.
And there are those who like to pick the phone and call their friends.
At the end is all a matter of choice and expectations.
What a wonderful life!
LoveNlight
Gabi
…and there are those who got so addicted that all they do during their days is fb/t.
but as u said it is all a matter of *choice* and expectation :)
Lea
Beautifully written and accurate. One section are the ones absolutely addicted to the games on them.
Hi everybody.
As we talk about on line friends, I have to be honest, and tell the good part too. Appart the people here on blog, that they all so kind and bright, and first of all you dear Paulo, that even if you dont make my phone ring you give me so much joy, I also encountered nice people while chatting. They not the majority, indeed, but they were helping me with information, or other. Even I got calls from abroad while I was ill in bad with terrible back pains, could not move, a nice friend, called me to see how I am, he is living in Italy and each time I need, no matter if I was not talking to him from months, he kindly help me with computer advice, not even my family helped me on that. I have brothers that when I needed urgent help with computer( for example to write me thesis) they told they too busy…And that far away boy( he is really young) from Italy was always there to help me without asking anything in return. More, he said I dont even have to say thanks…
Even for new years eve I got phone call from him. It was a kind gesture.
So among bad things, one can find really good things in on line friendship, certainly only finding the right people.
Love you all
Alexandra
Hi dear Paul, so sweet of you. You really very kind. Wish you too all and only wonderful things.
Love
Alexandra
Until now I have only found love and light in the Internet. Even if the dark exists I prefer to be optimistic and see everything with the eyes of a child.. and try to .. learn. Even whenever I ‘read’ or ‘see’ something that I do not agree or do not like I just try to ‘understand’.
I have watched your video Alexandra, but the sound was very low. With my English I prefer to see the … written Logos! Thank you.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Just wondering if you ever chatted with/to an audience of 20,000 [in person]?!! ;O)
It is surrealism, but it is not the only surrealistic fact.
It is true internet makes the distances a zero, allowing people from all over the world to communicate, but at the same time we all are more far from real human touch.
This quote makes me wonder if we can call someone friend if we met him in the internet, is he for real?
Friendship as all relationships doesn’t need as well human contact?
Friendship in internet is something that can be done or are we a little too eager to call a person friend allthough it seems that we are connected mentally?
Lonelyness is a great factor definately, but in life too people they don’t communicate as they used too for example, they don’t flirt so intesively as they did in the past.
So i think the problem is not internet use but the allienation and lonelyness that rule in modern life, resulting in superficial and lucking from emotions contacts.
The phone doesn’t ring because the friends in internet they are not present in our life and life needs friends, people that you can talk, share, laugh, fight and go out and mostly to phone you.
Καλημέρα Μαρία,
Πρόλαβα να διαβάσω το κείμενο σου την προηγούμενη εβδομάδα και σου παραθέτω παρακάτω το κομμάτι σου, που θα ήθελα και να σχολιάσω:
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“Για μένα αδυναμία είναι π.χ. να “ανοίγεις” μια πτυχή σου και ο άλλος να την χρησιμοποιεί εναντίον σου. Ποιος φταίει? Φυσικά εγώ που το επέτρεψα να συμβεί, γιατί είναι μαθηματικά βέβαιο πως όποιος έχει κάποια δύναμη, όποια και αν είναι αυτή, θα τη χρησιμοποιήσει, το πως είναι συνάρτηση πολλών παραγόντων.
Ο Καζαντζάκης έλεγε (συγνώμη που δεν θυμάμαι τα ακριβή λόγια πέρασαν πολλά χρόνια αλλά συνοπτικά είναι τα εξής) “πως αν δεν αγαπήσεις και δεν πληγωθείς δεν ζείς είσαι νεκρός και δεν το ξέρεις, γιατί ακόμα και όταν πονάς και όταν πληγώνεσαι σημαίνει πως είσαι ζωντανός”.
Εγώ έχω να προσθέσω τα εξής ζωή που σε πονάει και πληγώνεσαι δεν είναι ζωή είναι μικρός θάνατος και δεν είμαι και τόσο σίγουρη αν αξίζει και το κόπο δηλαδή.”
———————————————————–
Ήθελα, λοιπόν, να πω πως και φυσικά εσύ ΔΕΝ φταις και δεν είμαι και σίγουρος εάν μπορώ να πω πως φταίει και ο άλλος. Όπως γράφεις και στο κείμενο σου για το quote of the week, είμαστε φτιαγμένοι, για να συζητάμε με φίλους, να γελάμε, να διαφωνούμε και, πιθανόν, πάνω – κάτω, να γράψαμε περίπου τα ίδια, πάνω στο θέμα, με διαφορετικά λόγια.
Επομένως, είναι μέσα στη φύση μας και το να μοιραζόμαστε κάποια προσωπικά μας θέματα με άλλα πρόσωπα. Το πώς θα τα “εκμεταλλευτεί” ο άλλος, αυτό είναι άλλο θέμα. Δεν γίνεται, όμως, να καθόμαστε άπραγοι. Δεν μας συμφέρει βασικά. Και, προσωπικά, διαφωνώ πως είναι αδυναμία. Γιατί να το πούμε έτσι; Δεν υπάρχει άνθρωπος που να μην έχει ζήσει στιγμές, όπου να λαχτάρησε ένα χέρι βοήθειας κι ας υπάρχουν κάποιοι φανφαρολόγοι που να ισχυρίζονται κάτι τέτοιο. Μπούρδες!! Δεν το έκαναν ποτέ. Και αυτοί που το κατάφεραν, αφενός μπορεί να έχει χρειαστεί να πληρώσουν πολύ μεγάλο και πιθανόν δυσανάλογο τίμημα, αφετέρου δε, παραμένουν η εξαίρεση που επιβεβαιώνει τον κανόνα.
Κρύβουμε τόση δύναμη μέσα μας, που εάν την αντιλαμβανόμασταν, ποτέ πια δεν θα μας ενδιέφερε να μιλήσουμε για αυτήν. Θα την αναγνωρίζαμε και στους άλλους και νομίζω πως θα (συμ)πορευόμασταν με αυτούς πιο ανθρώπινα.
Τώρα για το ρητό του Καζαντζάκη. Δεν το έχω ακούσει, αλλά δεν είμαι υποστηρικτής και τόσο των ρητών. Καλά είναι τα ρητά…αλλά μέχρι ένα σημείο. Αυτό που μπορώ να γράψω πάνω σε αυτό είναι το “ζήσε όπως το αισθάνεσαι ΕΣΥ”! Μην κάνεις πράγματα, επειδή τα κάνουν και οι άλλοι. Εκφράσεις του στυλ…”όρμα στη ζωή” ή “ζήσε την κάθε στιγμή” είναι γελοίες και ΠΑΡΑ ΠΟΛΥ παραπλανητικές. Συνήθως μας γεμίζουν ενοχές και άδικα, κατά την άποψή μου. Έχουμε και την τηλεόραση, όπου γεμίσαμε με εκπομπές, όπου συμβαίνουν πράγματα που ουδεμία σχέση έχουν με την πραγματική ζωή. ΕΜΕΙΣ ΕΙΜΑΣΤΕ Η ΠΡΑΓΜΑΤΙΚΗ ΖΩΗ. Όχι, οι ανόητες σαπουνόπερες, με τους πανίβλακες πλούσιους και τα ξενέρωτα σενάρια.
Φυσικά, όπως και σε όλα τα μηνύματα μου, δεν σου κάνω μάθημα, ούτε υπονοώ κάτι για τον τρόπο που ζει ο καθένας. Απλά αρπάζω την ευκαιρία και “θάβω”, μερικά άθλια σκουπίδια που μας σερβίρουν και προσπαθούν να μας πείσουν πως έτσι είναι τα πράγματα.
Κλείνοντας, θα προσθέσω πως η ζωή έχει και θα έχει και χαρές και λύπες. Σαν δύο λεκάνες, η μία με ζεστό (ας το ονομάσουμε χαρά) και η άλλη με κρύο νερό (ας το ονομάσουμε λύπη). Αν έχεις τα χέρια σου, συνεχώς μέσα στην λεκάνη με το ζεστό νερό, όχι μόνο θα το συνηθίσεις, αλλά από ένα σημείο και μετά, θα χρειάζεσαι κι άλλο ζεστό νερό (για να νιώσεις χαρά)…και μετά κι άλλο…και στο τέλος θα καείς. Οι εναλλαγές είναι που μας κάνουν να αντιλαμβανόμαστε και ακόμα και να καθορίζουμε τι είναι καλό και τι κακό την δεδομένη χρονική στιγμή.
Θερμές αγκαλιές και να είσαι καλά! Ελπίζω να τα πούμε σύντομα…
soy la nueva Twitter-er pero no se como usarle???
Puede ayudarme por favor? Cual es el procedimiento por favor?
Muchas Gracias !
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=825Ekk1u3mQ&feature=fvw
RAINDROPS, Chopin, Prelude.
For Swannie who likes .. raindrops and all of You, for a goodnight [for us]. The most famous Raindrops of the World.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLr1oWjIC44
Autumn …just like Annie I love these months…
So here are lots of leaves for you…
As a child I just loved kicking them around… up in the air round and round …
Be well
Satora
Dear Thelma
Sorry for bothering! Will you please tell me how to upload a photo for my comments?
It will be very much appreciated.
Love
Jose
thank you so much dear Thelma, the pictures the music everything fitted. My favorite season.
I even saw an angel..:)
Love
…nada mudou, acredito que seja esta a eterna busca no outro das nossas carências, os veiculos são mais modernos, mas as necessidades as mesmas. O encontro do eu verdadeiro, do amigo,sempre acontecerá, mudam as fórmulas, permanecem os resultados com roupas novas.Bjs.
Hello Paulo…..This quote has been going round in my head a lot since I wrote my first comment…I think it is indicative of the state of our society and to a certain degree it worries me. It is different for you as you are a famous author but I dont understand why say someone like me would want thousands of friends on one of these sites as really it is then just a numbers game, it is not genuine and as I see it…once you shut down your computer no one is going to call you as very few really care. Different people have different reasons for using social networking sites but i think those who are there looking for real friends will be left waiting….I think they can make a lonely person feel lonelier and then in more danger of being manipulated. I am not ashamed or bothered to tell you here that at one time in my life I was very lonely and I met who I thought were these really special people. We got on really well.They were two friends who had grown up together in childrens homes…A man and a woman. They had done well for themselves….and were working in the music industry….they offered me a job as voice coach…I was thrilled and excited about this….But I had been scammed…..In fact there was only one person all the time….and there wasnt a job….This unfolded because they said they wanted to meet me in Paris and we could spend three weeks there and would need to meet bands etc. At the time there was no way I could afford to do this and I told them straight out. Thats when i got the wake up call. Everything suddenly changed course. I realised the scam and cut off all contact. I have learnt from this and have become more aware. It is a surreal world on these sites but it is also a challenge and I have also met some fantastic people.
Paulo I apologise for my first comment I wrote it before you put in your PS…lol………with love to you…xxx
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
Leo Buscaglia
Have a nice day.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Beautiful, Thelma. Thanks. I believe in it. Small things (if we can call it that way) we do, matter… and by chance will become big.
Be well. I love this quote.
Liina
hello Thelma,
i am new to this blog and i always read your comments.i don’t know what you do but definitely you are very good observer of human behavior.i am 19yr old doing my b.tech in computer science.like others i too have an account in a social network site.my friend list is not in thousands but in hundreds.and i end up with no calls at the end of the day.i guess the world is becoming materialistic day by day.we all complain for the same but never give a try to solve it.its true that we hardly get calls but then how many times do we take the pain to call our friends.
with love,
naveli
Dearest Sheelu, Leo Buscaclia’s books were a big inspiration to me and I think my .. temperament matches his own…: I love hugs, sweet words, caresses, tenderness, showing affection, looking into other’s eyes, smelling flowers and …. perfumes [;-], the smell of the rain, the smell of a … baby, touching, tasting … chocolates.. Our senses are the connection to the material world. This is how we experience it, together with our .. super senses we are ONE with our beloved ones. We transcend our … loneliness.
Love you for loving life.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Touch me, hear me, see me. These are the words I heard from my children from the second they were born.
I just met a young boy on the train, he asked if his music was bothering me, and when he got off he made a point of saying goodbye, and on the platform I saw him throw himself into an embrace with one of his friends. He was beautiful, touching and being touched. So I satrt my day with a smile and now it is broader thanks to you Thelma! In honour I will double my quota of random smiles and greetings to people I don’t know.
With love, Daniel
Te amo Thelma
Dear Heart, BFF, I think that both our opinions go to the … extremes. Every situation is different. But .. not only friendships but … bothers’ relationships and marriages, were ruined because of .. money, loan’s guarantees etc. Being a lawyer’s wife I can tell you a lot of real stories.. So better … keep the rules from the .. start!
Regarding ‘presents’… ‘The winner stands alone’ is full of paradigms. How many expensive gifts are given, just in order to … put someone on a … BED?? !! How many pretend that they are friends just in order to ‘steal’ some of the .. glamour and riches of other people. Paulo must have a lot of stories to tell..
As for us, simple people, using our intuition and reading the signs we … know how to .. accept and, of course, return the presents and affection of our loved ones! My Grandfather was saying: The fool was seeing at the present and was happy, But the wise was .. thinking: How to return.
As for friendship and pure love we are here to .. love and be loved. Each offers his .. soul’s flowers.. freely.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
And I love you very much.I think you are the wisest soul I’ve never met.Really.
Yes, every situation is different indeed. You are right to refer to Paulo’s critic, and at the same time praise, of the favor bank. I was lucky, I could borrow money from the state to get the education I wanted, and have borrowed money from a solid bank to pay for the house I live in. Two ways of getting money, much less messy than if I had to beg on my knees from families or friends. I must say this though, I’d rather ask a friend for help, than having to use a loan shark. Many people do not have a state or a good bank where they will get loans, and HAVE to try from a friend. Recently I heard of an American student, who wrote a letter to tons of wealthy acquaintances, and he received $5000 in scholarship from them. They get to write off these gifts on their taxes anyway. So, give and take for both parties.
Now, back to the week end phones from face book “friends”..hehe.
Love and admiration BFF,
Heart
xxx
I’ve always been sort of a stickler for precision of language…that being said, I think 20,000 “friends” is an impossibility unless we devalue the word so much that a “friend” is more or less anyone at all…and that IS surreal.
I thought a friend was someone you trust, someone you can count on, someone you can be there for, someone you bond with, someone you know well enough to set them apart from the rest of the world and appreciate them for the special soul they are. How can a friendship be maintained with 20,000 people unless it is relatively shallow, not time intensive, not deep or meaningful, and not needing of one’s best self?
I’m sad to see “friend” re-defined to such a vapid term. Do young people, for whom this way of connecting is daily life even know how to find, make, and BE a real friend in the original sense of the word? For their sake, I hope so…because the need for friends is not so surreal as what we’re calling “friends” these days…it’s just the good old fashioned need to find humanity in another kindred spirit. Is that best achieved on the internet? Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmm….
Ah, the youth of today, what is the world coming to? ;) We do the best we can with what we have. Of course if would be lovely to talk over coffee and share these thoughts face to face with all the people here. I’m in Geelong, Australia. Anyone up for a few beers and a good chin wag about anything at all? Drop me a line, I’ll buy the first round, and maybe we’ll become friends!
I have 32 contacts on Facebook, but only 4 friends.
P.S. talking of social networks, I wonder when we will have the first WOL wedding?
;-D
suurrealismoo o
que son los fans…
uno pra me e voçé
tête a tt
? ¿
1/2 = 50%
It’s a sign of our times that many people are living in a ‘surreal’ or fantasy world through the use of social networking sites such as Facebook.
This can be a result of boredom, loneliness and feelings of insecurity. I find it sad to see so many young people here in Egypt, for example, driven to the excessive use of FB through unemployment and despair about the future. Here they can safely escape from the reality of their daily lives. Actually they usually sleep all day and go on the internet at night! Also there is the danger of addiction and we often hear of cases of people neglecting their families, their ‘real’ friends and also their work obligations.
Of course, these sites are good if used properly. Through them it is easy to meet, get to know new people and exchange opinions and ideas across cultures. I don’t have much time for FB and only have a few friends, most of whom are family or close friends in real life. This is a quick and easy way of keeping in touch and exchanging photos etc. as we are all scattered around the world.
By trial and error, I have learnt some interesting things about friendship on FB, the most important being not to believe everything you hear from your friends! Last year, I noticed that a particular woman was leaving identical ‘love’ messages on the boards of two of the men I had met on Friendzii application from FB, so I decided to accept their friendship requests as a kind of experiment to see how these people interact with each other!!! Both men do not know each other but they both seem to believe that they are the “Special One” for this woman, because they reply with applications such as ” You are everything for me” or “I cannot live without you!”
They also send me things such as videos, hugs, kisses, hearts and flowers but I notice that they seem to have clicked on the “SEND TO ALL” button so they weren’t sent exclusively to me !!!
The last notification I had was “(…..) slept in with you, and 2,845 others.” This is ridiculous! An email or phone call from one of my real life friends, means so much more to me than these stupid applications.
I am very happy to have found this Blog through Facebook. It is really wonderful to share the ideas of everyone here. Each one brings something special and reveals a part of their identity in the comments they make. I feel I am getting to know so many of you and look on you as my friends. Thank you to everyone!
I don’t have 20.000 friends in my life, either on Facebook, either on Twitter but:
- I love Facebook because he allows me to share some music, jokes, photos with my friends or my family, to make absolutely “weak” tests but which make me laugh a lot
- I love Twitter because he allows me to share moments of enjoyment or a reflection of moment with my good relations
- I like the mobile phone because he allows to remain free of my movements while remaining to connect with my friends or my family
- I love Skype because he allows me to discuss a long time at a lower cost with the persons who I love and who are physically very far from to me
- I love Deezer because he allows to put and to listen to on his computer all the musics that we like and discovering the other musics by the way ” of persons of obscure repute ” which love Deezer also
Hurrah Internet, Hurrah the communication! :))
Each is free to make use of it or not, to find another way there of communicating or not…each this freedom thus… Hurrah the space and satellites!
Light & Love,
Hurrah, Hurrah, Hurrah the internet…. it is a beautiful amazing and incredible gift.
:D
Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!
interesting views…i agree with mr coelho. started fb after relocating from one country to another, staying in touch with friends and making new ones. i found a distant relative in u.s.
after 3 years more or less active use i realised that real friends are the ones i phone and email anyway. past or random acquaintances never write to me,never share real experiences with me, why keep them, why “collect” them on fb. new ones, well – prefer to meet people in real, too much selfpromtotion going on on fb,people prentend to be something that is just a fraction of their personality. is more like a mirror, you have a conversation with yourself and think others are watching…., most likely not. or if, even creepier.watching out my window i see people alone in their rooms in front of their computers. having no relationship but computertime. believing the world as explained by computers not making their own experiences,afraid to start a conversation with a stranger in the street.
fb- its not real connection. it turned into a big advertising machine!
since i stoped fb, i have more time to read, to reflect, to make a call, take a walk etc. i can happily life without it.
aww man i wanna add paulo coelho as a friend =/
Saw and felt you standing behind me.
(Can, shall I turn around?)
I am not you and I have no knowledge of you.
Am interested, curious and excited of course.
Now you are invited. You can visit me if you want.
Simply ask, miracle.
Since we speak about Facebook I will tell you a real story: When I was at school there was a girl a few years older than me. She was the best student, beautiful and talented. She used to sing the ‘Ave Maria’ like an angel. She went to Italy and studied singing and got married there to an Italian from a famous family. She gave birth to a son but she was not happy. The parents of her husband were interfering with the couple’s life and child. So she returned back home. She was not allowed to see her child.. Last week I heard that she found her son in .. Facebook, a man of 46 years old and he comes to see her and she visits him… The miracle of facebook.
If only we communicate with the other … dimensions so easily and … have PROOFS, dear Paulo Coelho.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Lovely beautiful ending (and starting) story … Personnally, I do not hold nothing against Facebook or Twitter. I think what is there is the time that we put in that medium to develop relationships vs the time we put in our personal lives to develop relationships and grow from that powerful natural instrument. As for the other dimensions, it is possible … but we are not in that case in “control” :-) and/or depends on the quality and time invested in that “type” of relationship. With love, Jojo.
Dear BFF,
Your story gives me the chills…Wonderful!
Heart
xxx
Beautiful hirtory Thelma.
It is amazing how much controversy facebook arouses amongst friends and family.
So i’d like to set my record straight – for all the accusations that facebook is, as my brother nicknamed it, fake book; that it is a waste of time and … oh golly, i’ve heard it all.
In a world where we can live in different countries from our families and friends; a world where ‘work’ can consume our time and leave moments for exchanges superficial or fleeting; a world where, without the telephone directory we have lost touch with our old friends…
then social communities like facebook or twitter are fine by me.
I have reconnected with so many people from the past, who, through the complexities and consequences of life I had lost contact with… and now play a simple game of scrabble online every so often ;o)
There are many other reasons… but for now; here’s a cheer for reconnection!
Great post Catherine. It’s almost as if the universe as sent a subtle message “Hey, remember your humanity? Remember your connections?”.
So the next time someone says to me “people can’t connect any more, they need facebook and twitter and the internet” I will agree wholeheartedly and say “YES! Isn’t it GREAT!”
With love, Daniel
Bravo Catherine
13/12/2099, Cemetery,
X :are you still alive?
you :no, i’m dead? don’t you see where i am (in the grave)!who are you?and why are you asking me?
X : it’s not important to know who i am? but…
to be continued
It is true. And yet the whole world builds on this surrealism as if it where the rock on which to build our house on.
Those who believe this surrealism, sooner or later collapse, feeling empty, crying for truth and authenticity.
Then they start reading your books Paulo, and they feel better for a while as if your book were a quick fix. But once they have finished reading it, they return to the world they came from, and carry on proclaiming surrealism as the One And Only Believe.
No wonder though, because all of us have a tendency to continue doing what we are used to. It’s hard to break away from old habits, it’s hard, but not impossible if your heart is set to it.
So many people are affraid of being alone, because they confuse being alone with being lonely.
If they only new what magic is found in stillness, in solitude.
Watch and learn, for where do profets go in order to speak to the Most High?
Damn right, they go up the mountain, into the desert, because truth, meaning and purpose are given once we surrender in vulnerability. Only then can we hear and understand the whisper all around us, the Voice of Wisdom.
May solitude be your friend, may your ears learn to understand silence, for it is the dwelling of the Spirit Of Wisdom.
I think facebook is a …. good place to be .. informed about someone you love and do not want to .. disturb them with … phone calls!! Just a .. ‘move’ there, we know he is well and alive; up on the … clouds or down to earth .. living and acting.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Dear Thelma,
thank you for the hint, but I am thinking about leaving internet activities and spend this time for sport and fitness.
this is why im not a part of fb or any other social networks, i feel that its all too fake. i’ve left people in the past for a reason, I want to move forward without looking back at them. maybe i’m wrong though since nothing seems to go my way.
WE ARE ONE!!! We want to love and be loved.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Very interesting thoughts Jenny and Thelma!
There was, at one time in my city, concerned parents over ‘fakes’ on the internet, and just as many concerns that people could not make ‘real’ friends using the internet. Concerns can be helpful and are appreciated for the grains of truth.
In ‘real life’ or internet, some experiences are wonderfully pleasant, and some hurt. I agree dear Jennie, that some lessons are painful when learning about trust and friendships (all kinds of things in life!).
But what helps me, is to strive to find the lesson, forgive, then try again (practise). Usually for me, a mistake was exactly the right way to learn, with perfect timing too! First, to begin with learning more about and being a great friend to myself. The qualities that I like, love and nurture is then what I can offer to friends.
But the fun is also in growing, learning and making changes. And, becoming better with practise, at making choices.
Thank you for sharing your worries and will be thinking of you Jennie, and hope you will not give up in finding at least one friend to walk along with, when you choose.
Thelma, soooooooo beautiful. I agree wholeheartedly that we are one and want to love and be loved.
Much Love to All, Jane : ) xo
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