I was reading a very interesting article about gossip. Of course, gossip is something very dangerous. But at the same time it is used to locate people in this world. Somehow they can establish comparisons, feel better, and dont feel lost. So I’d like to hear your opinion on gossips.
Thank you,
Paulo
DON’T WORRY ABOUT YOUR ENGLISH. BUT IF YOU FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE, POST IN YOUR MOTHER TONGUE (PORTUGUES, ESPANOL, FRANÇAIS, ETC.).
{ 242 comments… read them below or add one }
← Previous Comments
Next Comments →
Oi Paulo,
Parabens por sua democracia. É bom a gente ouvir também aqueles que não gostam do que fazemos. Olhe, escutei todo o “Vencedor está só”. Pena que ouvi falar que não vendeu muito. Talvez se você castigasse no final aquele russo safado o livro teria vendido melhor.
Olhe vou aproveitar sua democracia para lhe dar uma sugestão: Se você tiver um kindle, baixe o livro BOTE VARARI.
Beijos
Eliane
i dont understand anything and I want to die as a result of what is happening to me. If people don’t think someone “belongs” somewhere then they should tell them that before something happens which the person doesn’t understand and someone has been visitng me for a long time without my knowlege who doesn’t belong here, so why is that ok?
Li e gostei.
Olha Eliane, acho que voce deveria receitar o Bote Varari para esta turma que acha os crimes do MST.
Talvez eles junto com o ministro da justiça pudessem entender melhor o brasil.
There are so many kinds of gossip. For example, there is information shared (or purposely “leaked”) with the intention of helping someone who is in trouble. There are times when we share anecdotes or stories about people we have known (without necessarily naming them) in order to illustrate a point. There are instances when we may inquire about someone who is not present, in genuine concern for their well-being…. There are so many ways of talking about people in their absence, which might be interpreted as “gossip.” Many of these are fine, in my opinion. The dividing line between what is acceptable and what is not acceptable lies with the intent of the person who is speaking. Is the intent behind the words of good will? Or is it malicious? Is the motive to share concern or to inform? Or is it merely to be nosy and meddlesome?
As for people who talk about other people simply because they have nothing better to talk about – much in the same way that one might talk about the weather – these people, I find infinitely boring. Given the choice, I’d rather spend an evening alone, in peace, than to be engaged in such tiresome conversation.
On the other hand, my grandmother gossips, and this doesn’t bother me at all. In fact, I find it quite quaint and even charming in a way. She doesn’t watch the evening news or read the newspaper, because she doesn’t care what is happening in the next town over, and certainly not what’s happening on the other side of the globe. Her world is small, tightly contained, composed of people whose faces and names and histories are familiar, not just because she knows them, but because she knew their parents, and their parents before them, and so on. She’s a walking encyclopedia of local knowledge about people and their relationships to one another. She knows who lives where and for how long, who lived there before them and why they left; she can tell you who dated whom before they were married and which is the real father of this or that child. She knows much that isn’t meant to be known, and she remembers everything, down to the last forbidden detail. At the same time, she almost never speaks ill of anyone. If she does not like them, she simply says nothing. She does not judge. Or if she does, she never pronounces her judgments. She’s also the first to say, “Don’t go meddling there – that’s none of your business.” When she offers up “forbidden information,” it is for a reason – because, in her mind, the person asking “needs to know.”
I wonder, how might things have been different had my grandmother lived centuries ago, before TV and radio and newspapers? How might her role in that small community have been different? How might she have been respected in her old age, even revered – the keeper of knowledge, the collector of histories.
yup, so its simple, gossip was needed to stay informed, right?
Then people used it may be as a tool for revenge, etc…so it got wrong.time changes perception.
I think a gossip is a way to be a part of something which you don’t belong to. An attempt to be seemed… but no to be. It’s a game with life when one is trying to draw his own world with wrong lines on the dirty sketch… It’s when one can touch only a surface of something and judge with 1% of the real information….
When you talk to somebody about others in a good way it makes people remember good about each other makes them love each other more so in this case gossip is a good thing.
But when the person speak about the defcts or weaknesses of other people it means that he is not satisfied by his own life he is unhappy person.
I read it to come down to earth as i fly high moste of my time ;)
A fantastic platform to loosen yourself, not to take yourself too seriously, neither life, nor your surroundings. If you can gossip you definitely let people see your folly which is good, it’s freedom from proving and correcting yourself all the time. Gossip can happen only if one observes other’s and take notes, meaning one is not extremely self centred up to the level of self obsessed so as not to care about what’s happening everywhere. It lightens the burden on a heavy heart and if done without malice it is a completely harmless activity full of fun and enjoyment.
I don’t know if this is really a gossip, but every shameful person that sometimes not dared to say “I love you” to a man or a woman, can understand and perhaps revive it.
A night, inside in my shell and intimidated by the effect of attraction to a woman, I told a friend that I liked a girl in the group but i did not dare approach her, shortly after, the comment sounded in the mouth of all friends in group and obviously the girl already knew my comment, there was no going back, past the shame … I got 2 presents: 1- Know went to are going to say and especially to whom, 2-That gossip is transformed into a love relation of 6 years, and today still enjoy it.
Awww, that’s sweet.
Gossip could be of two things; negative or positive. The sole gossiper holds the key for the destruction or build up for a person.
Pienso que el chisme es algo muy negativo, asi sean chismes “bien intencionados” porque siempre se suele decir verdades a medias o mentiras destructivas. SINEMBARGO yo lo he practicado un sin numero de veces y lo he disfrutado PERO siempre me arrepiento porque se que no lo debo de hacer y si se practica muy frecuente se vuelve adictivo.
Pienso que el chisme trae mas concecuencias negativas a las personas que lo practican, que de las que se habla.
I don’t participate in it and I don’t like being the recipient of hearing it- I usually walk away from it rapidly as it makes me feel nauseous. The majority is untrue and a time waster- we could be doing something more constructive in the world, like helping people, healing and thinking of creating beautiful things. I keep well away from those who are renowned for it. I prefer peace of mind and freedom.
As long as it is harmless, I believe gossip is a kind of a need for people. But the difference between harmless and harmful gossip should be taken into consideration. Like, when you meet with your really close friends, I don’t think there exists a person that does not gossip. It is to have fun, not to hurt other people. But when it starts to hurt other people, then you should know your limits, and you should be able to stop. I believe the limit is the most important thing in gossiping. It is banned in Islam religion and considered as a very big sin. As a follower of this religion, I still do gossip, in a way that is harmless as it can be, and with people that I
Gossip can be harmless,getting to know others,finding out they share things with you.I think it is mostly negative nowadays.A way of others joining forces above others.A game of oneupmanship.I have had the most stupid rumours spread about me and I didn’t worry because I thought they were so stupid nobody would believe them.But imagine my surprise when I was shunned by a whole neighbourhood.I was stunned that anyone could believe such stupidly made up stories.But they were believed and I was made aware that those around me were more stupid than I could ever imagine.I still find it amazing.
Pauloooo meu querido amigoooo… Não tenho participado das discussões e questionamentos, mas nào deixo de passar aqui toda semana para acompanhar… Você é minha homepage… Mas no momento tive que eleger outras prioridades para seguir o caminho que escolhi. Mas apenas para constar.. vi suas perguntas e a menção sobre a Festa de São José de 2010. Tenho acompanhado os fóruns e as discussões, mas apenas no sentido de me fazer refletir… não tenho lido as respostas dos demais participantes… enfim… Passei aqui apenas para dizer que o SEU lugar no meu coração está bem cuidado e atualizado e que meu pensamento É contigo todo o tempo!!!! Abençoado seja, meu querido MESTRE. AMO VC…
Beijos (simples, singelos e amorosos) aqui do sul do Brasil ;-)
PATRICIA RUDECK
HI PATRICIA RUDECK, I am going to try to translate your comment!!
LOVE to you in Brazil,
Thelma xxx
- gossip – an overflow of words when you are delirious.
how well put, excellent I love this one
We should be grateful to Gossip!
When I was doing my research project on evolution, I learnt that one of the big reasons why human beings are at the stage where they are is gossip. We gossip so much (1/3 of our conversations are gossips) that we know of many dangers and so we know how to invite it.
Thank you for making this point Usman Shehzad! ‘Positive gossiping’ must not be mixed with ‘Negative bullying’.
Love & Admiration,
Heart
Really?
So, gossiping is a trait that is evolutionary advantageous?
[kaltura-widget wid="9bmnz8lb88" size="comments" /]
I work in a big organisation and red the article Mr Coelho posted about gossip few weeks ago and can relate to it.
But in my private life I try to not be involved in gossip sharing. It is one of the hardest thing to NOT do if you are aware of it and really try to let be. I believe to talk about peoples best qualities always and not add anything negative/harm to universe myself.
fazer uma fofoquinha de vez em quando é bom, afinal sou brasileira kkkkkkk, mais com cuidado bjs
Gossip-порождает как поэтов так и вампиров.
There is one way perhaps that I can see gossip as good.
Let’s take a strict society where social norms are extremely suffocating and limit opportunities for expression. Then of course, gossip is going to be a fun moment of social exchange because barriers are being bridged [even if albeit momentarily] and people are relating to each other, rather than peering over walls
;o)
Just keep the subject topic clean and friendly… that’s all it takes to be ‘nice’.
Mirando el chisme por el lado positivo tengo una anecdota que contar. Un dia mi esposo me vio leyendo una revistas de chismes de la farandula y el me pregunta. Porque pierdes el tiempo leyendo esa basura? Yo le respondi porque es tantas las estupideces y la basura que esta revista dice que me causa mucha risa y asi me distraigo de las noticias malas y realmente preocupantes del mundo.
Gossip is a thing which should be avoided always.It benefits nobody but may create a major impact on the life about whom the gossip is made.
Gossip to a certain degree is healthy…but it is surely dangerous when it starts hurting the sentiments of other people :)…I’d recommend healthy gossip
Gossip is only a medium to express yourself. Good or Bad doesnot lies on the medium , it depends on how you llok at it . You have the choice to make it good or bad.
Hello 2 everyone! Just imagine the world without gossip … it would probably be kinder … purer … gossip is kind of dirt … & everyone is involved in it, if one lives in the society …
I think that you kind of sell yourself if you commit to gossiping. Gossip is rarely something positive. It is often used to control other people, the ones who are gossiped about. Gossiping is somehow like weaving a spider’s web, in which all of us get caught in. If we refrain from gossiping we become more free.
You wrote us today that “when people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other”
I think that except from fun people like gossips for two reasons…first because they can find comfort in similar stories with their own and second because they need to imitate and this way to feel accepted by society.
But the worst about gossip is that we dont stay on the facts but we put our personal opinion or we judge someone for his actions…we are like the people who were throughing stones to Maria Magdalena…we judge to feel superiors…
Here, i share the same views as that of Buddha:
“What is evil? Killing is evil, lying is evil, slandering is evil, abuse is evil, gossip is evil: envy is evil, hatred is evil, to cling to false doctrine is evil; all these things are evil. And what is the root of evil? Desire is the root of evil, illusion is the root of evil.”
love love love to everybody.
<3 <3 <3
tc.
Buddha is quite a clever chap :)
Clinging to “false doctrine” is evil. So then, clinging to “true doctrine” would be good? But wait a minute! (By “doctrine” I’m assuming you mean “dogma.”) What is dogma if not just another illusion? – An illusion motivated and perpetuated by the human desire to organize, systematize and “make sense” out of that which is beyond our comprehension – the desire to make life neat and orderly, to create rules and set limits, to deny chaos in all its beauty.
I’m just giving you a bit of a hard time. Please don’t take it personally. I’m trying to grasp it, but I’m thinking that maybe I missed or perhaps misinterpreted something.
Hola Paulo,
Una inquietud tuya, el “chisme”. Yo pienso, el chisme
es un veneno escondido, que no se injecta directamente
a la gente, más bien, es un veneno que con rodeos
tibios llega al perjudicado. En cierta forma aquel que
propaga el chisme y aquel que lo recibe son dos sujetos
que de alguna forma mantienen una relación indirecta,
que están unidos por un hilo invisible donde el uno se
siente omnipotente y el otro humillado. El chisme es
una palabra, una frase, un libro dentro del cual la
verdad agoniza. El chisme deja de ser un suenio para
ser una pesadilla escondida, pero está presente aunque
el mundo pretenda no mirarlo. Yo personalmente prefiero
cambiar en la palabra “chisme” solo dos letras y
escribirlo “charme”, eso sería mi mundo ideal, un
puente através del cual encontrar personas y
encontrarme a mi mismo.
stban
talking about persons who are not present..actually very bad manners
It depends on who the person is, and what the gossip is. I think I’ll not yield much to it, but it might hurt those loved ones around us, and that’s really bad for us.
Creo que el chisme esta basado en el juicio. Juzgamos a traves del cotilleo. No estoy de acuerdo con esta práctica porque es desagradable para otros, ensucia reputaciones y trae consecuencias funestas. La palabra tiene un gran poder; hay que usarla para el bien… siempre. Recuerden: la rueda que más suena es la que peor trabaja… No es lo que entra por la boca lo que hace mal al hombre, sino lo que de su boca sale, pues del corazón prodece… Si al hablar no haz de agradar, te resultará mejor callar.
Y en definitiva, si somos victimas de las habladurías mi recomendación es la siguiente: revestirse de teflón para que nada se nos pegue..!
Que los guerreros de la Luz les acompañen.
Zoila ; )
I was feeling like having fun with it, spreading some insane gossip, like I was crazy, or Paulo smokes crack. Joke! Gossip is such a joke, small minded people trying to feel better about themselves. Feeling below others so much, they relish the feeling of being on top. So help me God I will remember the wise words of Wayne Dyer I believe who said people who try to define you are incapable. They are only defining themselves as people who need to label others. Anyway, Peace be with you all and the gossipers too, if it were possible.
No a lugar para los chismes.
Si lo que vas a decir no es útil, no es verad, no es de interes para los que te escuchan será mejor que te cayes. Las palabras crean y destruyen, son el arma más potente que tiene la Humanidad. Utilizar las palabras es poner en marcha los pensamientos, cuidar los pensamientos y por ende las palabras será la clave para la Humanidad de Hoy.
Un beso Paulo
it is easy to call people “dim” when you have been given inforamtion that they have not. I do not understand what these posts about because I have been the victim of gossipping many times and I have done it but in response to something that someone has done to me. If they have not done it I would not have gossipped. Whatever gossip i may have committed must have been inadvertant and whenever i tried to communicate with anyone they were very secretive. I beleived in what I was doing, if it was false I had no way of even imagining that was possibel and would not have done it if i knew it was false. If someone gave me the false gossip then I think that is a bad person, but i deserve to know why i am hated so much (although I have never figured that out in previous situation becaue it tends to happen without me even opening my mouth or typing with my fingers
Funny, just read the four agreements by don Miguel Ruiz which has three or four pages on gossip.
it may be a way to situate yourself in a world, but not the one I’m live in. It’s a social addiction.
nice picture Hildegarde, you know what’s weed and what isn’t , that’s whats counts
The weeds are usualy the ones that even the snails won’t touch
So lovely, loved the images Hildegarde. I feel the same. Cordially, Jojo.
not younger, pretter
and pretter = younger
Gossip-введение в реальность или вывод из.
Funny how life is sometimes!!!! Last night, had a new client and you know what? She left work 2 weeks ago in tears and was ordered by the doctor a leave of two weeks. (Oups, here I am gossiping I think … but for a “good” cause!) Let me continue. She returns working but something tells her that she needs some kind of help because she is confused. The problem concerning her job “for her” is that she is surrounded of gossipers that gossip about her chief, and by the way her chief gossips about her chief and her employers. Funny but all of them go gossip to her!!!! Ok, in this case, clear that gossips has a negative effect on her. Could have condemn the gossipers and went on to speak about the negative effect of gossips, tell her to stay away … by the way, that is what she is doing (dining alone, not attending parties, fleeing when one approaches. She needs help and all she sees as a solution is leaving the job. But then, she revealed that her last two jobs were the replica of this one. Clear for me that life brings her there another time until she finds out what she needs to find out. Now, why is there that she lets the gossipers come and gossip to her so easily? They have a place to go! And that freedom she gives them to gossip makes her now sick? How come she let that be. By fear of making waves, of hurting more the chief that is hurt enough that others if she expresses her personal needs concerning the job, fear of being rejected by others if she says she is not at ease to hear them. She isolates herself, by fear of having them come to her and gossip. Could debate and put all the blame on the gossipers, but are they the one responsible for her being sick now, or are they elements brought by life to permit her to grow, an initiation thing like? In reality, she is put before “humans” not responsible for their lives, their needs, defensive. Acceptance of the situation that you cannot change (the others). Putting the lenses on her brought her back to how she is not confident, has low esteem, is afraid to make waves if she expresses her limits to the others (as a child her father would burst and be violent). She realizes that the gossipers at work are humans that just have difficulty also to express, put limits, be responsible and they fall into schemes, and since they do not find the solutions, they pass their anger, frustrations by gossiping and the receiver receives them wide open, with a smile, kindness, not giving importance to how for her that behaviour does not solve problems and makes her unease. Being now more sensible to her, and aware that she was in part responsible in maintaining that energy (since no expressions and no limits, listening without talking), she understands that she can give less power to the gossipers and instead of bathing in negative energy and loosing her vital energy, she is now determined to focus on her needs and to respect who she is by having the courage to tell them that relation is important for her, that she wish to be in relation with them, but for her in order to be there, she will not accept that they talk about the superior in her absence and wish them to take care of their problems in another fashion, like she decided to do, with respect. And yes, she is aware that she is risking becoming the next one to be the subject of gossip but she is ready. She wants peace. So, before rejecting or let’s say choosing not to be with them if they do not respect her limits, she will exist first. One step at a time. So for me, in that case, those gossipers are humans who do not seem to find the solutions to express in front of an authority (power) and they look like kids in school talking about the schoolteacher. I have no difficulty saying that gossiping is hurtful and negative, not a solution, but that does not bring me to judge the one that gossip, the soul that is trapped, the one that is blind. I am just sensible of his inability to exist freely and be creative. What is there is I have no doubt that gossip is something that hurts but even for me in my life I grew because of that hurt and growing and growing brings more and more love for myself and for the other. They are in the dark, searching for light the wrong way. And again, in that gossip, we understand the essence: A superior at work that has an attitude that frightens the employees, employees that because of fears are not capable to express and they have that “exutoire”, gossip, to empty all the frustrations that accumulates … and maybe my client will be the one that will have the light that they need. So, when in relation with people that gossip, I tend to listen and find out what is beneath and then exist, staring with me what it does for me, etc … If I choose to leave, I will exist and tell why I am leaving, because I am not at ease in that kind of energy, but they will know, because I am sensible to a soul that is lost. Cordially, Jojo.
Hello Johanne
That usually happens very often. It is therefore not easy to keep all the balls in the air at the same time. Being well and to like everyone, there are diferent point of view and the more evil-minded is a person, any conduct by another person who supervises, you can interpret in their own way of seeing things. True irespectar no limits to the image of another person.
In my case, I resigned from my current job because I was not given the opportunity to grow. It is very difficult for a person to develop in this company, because they take much into account the opinion of the supervisor. HHRR Even the manager, gives an example of that in 24 years working for the company, has climbed three positions only.
They take things personally!!!
True and light,
Aloha!
I make a difference between rumours and gossip. Gossip to me is the smalltalk about others, who often do no harm and is based on observations and experiences, perhaps with a questionmark. “Why did he or she do that?” which can inf fact help raising awareness of one’s behavior.
Rumours however is to me, fabrications or exaggerations, often completely false and designated to harm another; which can become a lethal weapon for both professional and personal relationships.
The best way to decrease both the gossip and the rumours is of course to have a dialogue directly with the person appearing, but for some reason, people seam to lack courage to ask the tough questions and answer them truthfully.
/Alexandra
i grew up in a small town i Northern Germany, more a village. In our street every child knew not to go visit old Bert. He was a thief! Everybody knew that. Then one day my grandmother took me along to see him, she had cooked too much as usual and was bringing portions of Puffert, pears and vanilla sauce to her neighbors and today also to old Bert. i was silent until we were almost at his backdoor. Then i tucked at her sleeve and asked if we couldn’t leave it standing in front of it, just pretend he wasn’t at home. Grandma wanted to know why and i said, he’s a thief, you know…. She walked into the backroom and into the kitchen were Bert was having a cup of tea. We were offered one and she kindly accepted. They chatted about the news and i looked around wondering what stuff i saw was stolen. Then suddenly she said, there still is this rumour about you Bert, about you being a thief. He smiled at her and his big old head bobbled up and down. He must have been in his sixties but he looked ancient with his pants high up on suspension belts. Yes – during the war, i stole potatoes and sugarbeets from the field, he smilded, those were the days huh Erna. She smiled back at him, yets thanks to you we had a meal. That was all she said, but it was also all that was needed.
Bonjour! Liked to read all your comment, Alexandra. Jojo.
Think there is good and bad gossip just like everything else
Much Love Tina
Eu tenho uma úvida que não tem nada haver com o assunto – fofoca-.
Mas se alguém puder me explicar, ficaria feliz. – Ainda mais se o próprio Paulo Coelho o fizer – ..
O que o Deus Cornífero – representado por um homem de barba, com casco e chifre – e a Deusa Mãe tem haver com a Nossa Senhora?!
Bom… Pois é a esses deuses que a religião Wuiccana adora não é!?
Alguém pode me explicar, gostaria de entender! – por favor Paulo Coelho -.
If we all were like open books, there would be nothing to gossip about!
I like the image of the Three Wise Monkeys:
See NO evil
Hear NO evil
Speak NO evil
So Gossip for me, is a No-No-No.
Mahatma Gandhi’s one notable exception to his lifestyle of non-possession was a small statue of the three monkeys … and he was VERY wise.
Also from the Analects of Confucius: “Look not at what is contrary to propriety; listen not to what is contrary to propriety; speak not what is contrary to propriety; make no movement which is contrary to propriety” (非禮勿視， 非禮勿聽，非禮勿言， 非禮勿動).
is ALSO very wise.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_wise_monkeys
Dear Pandora, I always thought the three monkeys were related to Mafia, I guess I was really naive. Thanks for enlightening me.
Love
Alexandra
Thank you Pandora! Regarding the three Monkeys I thought that they were guiding us to learn how not … to Judge and/or how to keep a secret! But also it may be a good lesson from a … Lawyer: I did not see anything, I did not hear anything, I say nothing! NO EVIDENCE, NO CRIME! It may refer as Alexandra says, to …. the Mafia’s or … Mason’s secrecy and LAW OF SILENCE.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
You know, gossiping once was a felony. You could get publicly punished for it!
For centuries gossiping, ill speaking and slander were considered as the 8th deadly sin. Even simply talking too much and babbling along were considered sinful. The 8th sin? Right next to killing that is! But gossip can kill, especially in hour age where the power of the word is so strong, stronger than ever maybe.
I once owned a little leather bound book that I can’t find under my bed now anymore. It had behavior rules for woman in it and dated from something like 1640 or 1650. I was absolutely shocked to learn how gossiping woman were brought to reason back then: they would get something like a mouth cage put on and apparatuses that held their tongues.
Since the book was gone I Googled and found the most amazing information on how ill speaking tongues were treated; As if it were the fault of the tongue itself and nothing to do with the mind behind it.
Bettina Lindorfer provides us with a haunting image of a ill speaking woman who has to wear a donkeys mask and is chained for all to see outside her house. ( http://www.fu-berlin.de/presse/publikationen/fundiert/2001_01/2001_01_lindorfer/index.html)
There actually is a Saint to turn to for husbands with their worries about their gossiping wife’s: Saint Babille or Babillia. This saint is not to be mistaken with St Babil, who is a man and serves other purposes (or is he a she? Time changes so much, why not gender?) They both have their feast on the the 24th of January. In Arragon St. Babille is still celebrated today with a women’s festival, when they invite the men to have chocolate.
What did St. Babille look like? I couldn’t find an image of her, only the description of one small carving underneath a coir stall in the little church of Sainte Maurille in Pont-de-Ce. Sainte Babille is depicted as a woman with a padlocked mouth. Husbands prayed to this Sainte Babille for a padlock to silence their wifes. (A history of woman in the west, on page 228, http://books.google.com/books?id=a4_DzyOA514C&pg=PA228&lpg=PA228&dq=saint+babille&source=bl&ots=__CO7b8T0i&sig=55H-skZJV0RdDOP2IC_lD3p1zyo&hl=nl&ei=t2cCS5LTI8LI-Qa504wV&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=2&ved=0CA8Q6AEwAQ#)
Babil is also a middle Eastern baby name, (babynames.com) meaning Gate of God, renowned for wine and magic and referring to the East in general.
That brings to mind the province of Babil in Irak that is often mentioned on CNN because of the many troubles there.
Babil – Irak – I had to think of Babylon and the tower, that had failed to be built as people suddenly talked in many tongues too, didn’t it.
Babel in the East appears to be a word without much emotion attached to it and quite respectable as a name in fact, here in western Europe it is loaded with emotion and has been for centuries.
Somewhere in between has to be a breakline and I think it must be behind Milano, as in Milano there still stands a church devoted to Saint Babila. Here the feast of Saint Babila is celebrated since 24 December 1387. The church is much older though. In the 4th century it was probably erected over a pre-existing Roman temple dedicated to the Sun.
The sun? referring to the sun is referring to the East and brings to mind Babil and the baby name list; And indeed: it is said that in proximity to todays eastern gate of the church the ancient Romans had placed the statue of the Sun.
I looked up babbel in my etymologigal dictionary and found out that it is a very old word as it sounds alike in so many languages: latin: babulus and babellare; in French: babiller, in Polish: paplac; in Russian:balabolit; in Italian: babollare; in Greek babázein and in Sanskrit balbūthá-h; – which brings us right back to the East and Babylon and it’s tower. What a wonderful world.
So there we are: gossiping is as old as the world and people have always been bothered about it. There is one thing though that amazes me: why is it always woman that seem to be the ones that use their tongues in all the wrong way?
(I got the flu, otherwise I wouldn’t have had the time to look it up)
To be honest, i think gossip is something that is addictive. It is a way of bringing us closer to others, by sharing information we have, and receiving information about people’s private lives. Whenever someone tells me any gossip I feel privileged that I am trusted enough to be told the gossip. I do not necessarily spread everything i hear but I admit that I do like to hear about other peoples’ lives, sad as it may sound. Although I feel happy to be trusted, the more gossip I hear from the person the less and less I trust them. I like people to trust me even though i will never trust those people that gossip because I know I am not the only one they are gossiping to.
I think that gossips are made by those who have nothing to do. i am so occupied with my own problems and have no time to spread rumours about others.
Alla
http://www.allasobirova.com
Gossip always makes me feel uncomfortable, especially when it is negative. In fact when people I know start gossiping about someone else it i very illuminating because we only ever see in others the mirror of ourselves. So I get to hear how they are judging themselves, what they don’t like about themselves and sometimes even the beauty and talent that they won’t accept that they have.
Another thing I realised, through personal experience, is that gossip always effects the person being gossiped about. A few years ago now I was involved in an unsuccessful business relationship that left me feeling drained of all creativity. Some time afterwards another friend told me how the person involved regularly gossiped about me, putting me down. My experience was of being completley drained of energy and becoming very reactive to the person involved and not understanding why. In some respects it could be described as a mild form of a curse.
We are far more powerful than we realise and even a basic understanding of quantum physics demonstrates how we effect one another, even when we are not in contact, simply by our intention. For that reason alone, I do not participate in gossip.
Rebecca
Querido Paulo,
Eu acho que a fofoca tem sempre um tom negativo pelo fato de ser falada por trás. No nosso dicionário em português ela quer dizer fazer mexerico ou pequenas intrigas. Eu sempre tento desviar e não render assunto a uma fofoca.
Beijos
Dear all,
After reading all the comments from top to bottom, My curiosity led to to search for the keyword “Gossip” in Online Cambridge dictionary. It reports that, gossip is-
“conversation or reports about other people’s private lives which might be unkind, disapproving or not true”
Now, by the definition itself gossip is negative.
Gossip about celebrity or your friends
and family
its negative when you are talking
behind
for those who matters
or do not matter
in eternity
face-face, the way you express
is far better than
behind your back
to praise
good if listener
comes out satisfied
bad if listener, gets disqualified
is bored with your gossip/cries
“go” and “sip”
gossip, isn’t it?
asking myself
if i ever did
well, maybe
but who cares?
when it was for
sharing
emotions and feelings
do you intend to harm while gossiping?
maybe involuntarily
does not matter
so much
to be like talkative
a reason for an excuse to
start an conversation, maybe
relationship is long journey
better if shared face-face
behind
someone’s back could be little too funny
so,
“go” and “sip”
it is just funny
gossip should be positive
and delightful
in long journey
God bless you all !
My dear Santosh,
In principle I agree, ‘Zero tolerance for gossip’. Your ‘go’ and ‘sip’ brings back my stay in Dublin, where we went to the pub almost every night for one year, to the extent I started to feel the ‘shakes’ if I didn’t go one night, and in fear of becoming an alcoholic, was glad when I returned to my home country.
The thing about going to the pub was, we were all sitting around laughing about incidents from the college where we worked, laughing about the kids, the teachers or the principle or whatever. And to me, it was the best therapy I have had ever! We could vent problems, and annoyances, and we could share opinions about work and community. Yes, it was very critical to call a teacher with long neck ‘giraffe’ behind his back, or another teacher ‘bubble’ who always looked freezing cold and always wore his heavy anorak, we pretty much had nick names for all the one’s not on ‘our team’ and were rolling around laughing. Sometimes we would wonder, does he know EVERYBODY calls him ‘giraffe’? Sure it’s mean, but hey, I had fun, and hope I didn’t contribute to bullying. I believe it was well meaning social fun, on behalf of those not present!! Cowardly. Ha!
Love & admiration,
Heart
PS Tried to download text from your new poem book, and got the intro. Great work as always! Yr my favorite poet from Himalaya :)
Santosh, I agree whole-heartedly! Beautiful words as always, thank-you.
With love, Daniel
← Previous Comments
Next Comments →