As you noticed that last week I posted here “Por que odeio Paulo Coelho”. The idea came during a conversation with a friend of mine, who was talking to someone who “hates” me and my friend asked: “why?” The more the person explained, the more she got confused. While reading 709 posts I got to the same conclusion.
They hate because someone said: you should hate it. I was also caught in this trap earlier in my life, and I can remember two cases: first it was with “The Little Prince”. Everybody said, Oh it’s a very superficial book. The second time was “The Prophet” (Gibran), also because “too easy to understand”. I waste some years before reading these two masterpieces.
So I would like you to share your similar experiences. Something/someone that you had a lot prejudices and later on you said; ” it’s much better then I thought, I should have my opinion instead of having other’s opinions.”
Thank you very much,
Paulo
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There is only 1 thing I never change my mind about in life. The rest is details.
Prejudice just mean to pre judge. Get to know someone before you think you know them.
Hi Paulo….I have been trying to think since yesterday about this theme….I am trying to remember time when I changed my mind….but cant for now…I must admit I am the kind of person who if someone tells me something isnt much good then I just have to go find out for myself. I tend to go my own way and not be influenced…..But i am sure there must have been at least one occasion when I have changed my mind…I will keep thinking during the week….
love to you Paulo ..xxx
Dear Paulo,
Thanks for allowing us to vent our feelings through your previous post. It was an interesting exercise because I was able to see my weaknesses and prejudices. I was also able to steer away from your wing and go search what else is out there on the internet and I must tell you I’ve been following the signs and of course my intuition. I’ve been praying for God to allow what comes from him to influence my life, mainly because a couple of times I noticed people mentioned being scared of you because of your ideas (my mother language is Spanish and so I can understand Portuguese to an extent). A friend of mine once told me that our connection with God is so strong that if our faith is strong our spirit cannot be influenced by others than God or what comes from him.
Have a blessed life and continue with your path to the light and keep on lighting up the lives of those who come in contact with you.
Love, Peace and Wisdom
Monica
Prejudices stem from ignorance. We’ve all been there at some time or another. Once we understand and respect different cultures and religions our prejudices become less. Also we mellow as we get older
This reminds me Shrek saying “people judge me before they even know me”. They do. We do. everything what’s fluffy is nice, everything slippery is disgusting.
Some prejudices come from our society where we grow up (poor man/rich man; educated/not educated; married/not married), some prejudices are from ancient times (women vs men; matriarchy vs patriarchy) and most destructive prejudices come from religion (to hate someone just because he is from another religion). We all life study and change opinion. To pass true prejudices is very important we to learn to Think!
Hi Paulo, prejudice is somthing a state of mind when you think or believe a person or a society or something known or unknown can actually harm you, in weaker societies like ours in India this is actually true.
Personally I do not subscribe to this tough.!!
I had many prejudices regarding books, music & the way of life. At some period in my life-especially early teens, I agreed with “general beliefs” and followed them. But later on, at the end of high school, light turned on in my head. I attended catholic high school & I had to do a project about wisdom books of Old Testament. That was the trigger moment, which opened the whole new world to me. I realized I walk alone and that there are many false prejudices around me. and also a lot of hipocrisy. I started to experience a world in a new way & didnt let others people beliefs control my life. On the way, there are wonderful and painful moments… but both are mine experience, from which I develop my own view of all.
I also thought “The little prince” was silly and childish,when I first met with it. It is really a masterpiece. but to see it is a great work.. I had to move past my prejudices about it.
When I was 16 I met a friend of my parents whom I did not like. He looked like a hippy with messy clothes and unkept hair. He spoke of vague things in a soft voice. Thankfully I got the chance to meet him again and again, and I started seeing his kindness, his wisdom, his inner peace. I grew to like him very much. I am grateful I knew him, he taught me to be more open and not judge too quickly. To look past my predjudices.
i have been more of a victim of that kind of thinking, one friend told me how someone said that i was a bad girl, one of those wayward thinking people, i am confused, and stupid and so she refrained from talking to me, and in the last year of school, we somehow became friends, we…i guess were partners then, sat next to each other, that was a rule in my school to sit with the given partner, to sit in an orderly manner in the class, so she then told me that she’d never talk to me because of that what she’d heard, i wasn’t wayward thinking, i needed love(i was masochistic btw, only she knew about it, she deserved it, such a beautiful soul), someone to see through me, i wasn’t confused, i didn’t know how to express myself and i wasn’t bad i was just…misjudged, i love that girl…lost contact but i know she loves me too, i know she must think of me someday, its so beautiful…being loved…and to love unconditionally, and, never if anybody reads this, never judge anybody and go on talking bad things for no reason, (which is called gossip generally), that hurts so bad, really, so i hate tags, they’re of no use, just love n live, anyways, tc everybody, love u, god bless…and, keep loving n living, don’t judge.don’t hate, if u do, ask yourself why? introspect.
xoxoxoxo
Usually I make an effort not to get involved with what other people might think of something.
Really thought about it, but can’t really think of any examples where I did end up not doing something because others said something negative about it. Rather the other way around: if everybody says something is bad/horrible/not nice, I might have the tendency to DO it instead of leave it. Depending on who said it and if I want to piss them off.
But I do have it happening the other way around quite often; I think somebody or something is really great. And later on find out he/she/it is not at all! For example ex-boyfriends :)
Love
I would hope that today – most people realize that “hate” is just reflection on themselves. It doesnt truly exist – as intangible as thought. An illusion -we “think” it and therefore believe it. Its the language we hear in our minds that bring the illusion to this realm.
In that process – if we can change the perception of the language we hear we can fade the outcome to a positive influence.
Stay mindful of your thoughts.
When I was younger I always was convinced that something was either right or wrong. I had a hard time understanding the fact that sometimes things are not as black and white as they appear to be or as you think they should be. I have learned and I have had to learn that between black and white there are numerous shades of grey. I used to “hate” people that in my opinion could not make up their mind. I considered them to be wishy-washy, not able to stand up for what they believed and therefore in my opinion “weak”, “back-boneless”, not worth trusting as they did not take a stand point and could blow with whatever wind was blowing. Now years later (not that I am that old ;) )I understand that indeed some people don’t ever take a stand point and do blow in whatever directions they think people expect them to blow, BUT there are people who are able to take a stand point, who are very aware of who they are and what they stand for without being black and white. There are people that understand the nuances of some delicate issues and who understand that there is not always one right answer. Things are not always either black or white, good or wrong. I don’t “hate” these kind of people anymore. In fact I am happy they have thought me that in between black and white there is grey. Moreover, there are different shades of grey. Obviously because of my character I still feel the need to get clear cut answers and views, but I realise there is no need to mistrust or “hate” every person that is not black and white.
Solo podría decir que tuve que entender que por mis propios prejuicios y un tanto de los demás, elegí dejar de ser y hacer lo que a mi me gustaba… pero entendí que esa no era yo, sino eran solo los mil espejos de lo que los demás querían que yo fuera…
No todo lo que la sociedad juzga como malo, en realidad lo es… por esos prejuicios no somos libres.
Creo que sería importante abrir más nuestro pensamiento para darnos cuenta que hay muchas cosas que podemos conocer antes de tomar la decisión de juzgar o rechazar a alguien por su forma de ser, más aun cuando de entrada no lo conocemos verdaderamente, pues muchas veces precisamente por su forma de ser o de pensar nos negamos la oportunidad de conocer a una persona de quien podemos aprender grades cosas…. y todo esto es por nuestros prejuicios.
Saludos Paulo!!!!
In my opinion it is absolutely hard to change their minds for people, that are less self-critical,less self-thinking, and bad educated.
I use to have prejudices against Turkish people. I am of greek origins and was raised in Greece. Through out my childhood, at school, at home and from my direct and indirect society, learned how to hate them and why…. i have to admit athought that those feelings of prejudice were coming from the mind 9even though I knew that this ‘nation’ have killed millions of my ancestors and that my great great grandparents were slaves to them and that my grandparents survived a genocite they caused back in 1919) and not from the heart…
Ten years ago I migrated to UK and had the oportunity to meet few Turkish people and later on live with them in the same house! They were all wonderful both the ladies and the men. And dispite my prejudices and theirs we gave to each other the chance to understand that after all we are so much alike…
Hi! I’m first time here.
Well there are many examples of prejudices, especially in my country, Serbia. There are one singer, Jelena Karleusa, who is very scandal-girl and because of that she is very unloved on Balkan. But then I listen some of her songs, watch some talk shows, after that I understand that she is not stupid as most of thought, she is just not understood.
And now, despite I don’t listen that kind of music, I love to dance with her music, and to have a lot of fun! :)
Do i exist if i have no opinion? i notice we like to define each other by opinions. (he is liberal because he thinks such n such, she is fashionable because she has some opinion…) but what if i have no opinion at all ? what is your opinion of someone who has no opinion … lol
My prejudice: Sex without emotional attachments, American hook-up culture. I don’t get it and never will… and my mind has not changed on that. It is very strange to me. However, I believe live and let live so people can do what they want but I would rather not participate. Peace.
contradiction – to claim to have no opinion, as You are here, is even an opinion. Everyone has opinions. Lol
I really really have no opinion for the most times. Call me a potato :)
One video from “Le Petit Prince” musical:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbe2FmflzVw
This VIDEO is the answer for this week conflicting quote!
OUR HEART ONLY can judge the difference between the true and false love!NO OTHER!
For me, the love without passion can NOT be true love! :-)
WARNING!!! Passion does not mean compassion! ;-) :-D
Ralph McTell Streets of London
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ctb-SrwL884
I usually had different opinions about rich people, because i knew people that was so vain in compare whit poor people about themselves. But in the course of life I knowing people so kind who don´t mind being rich…
I had different prejudices about it.
Avoid prejudging is allowed to know the other.
Hi Paulo, Hi everybody,
It’ s a very nice subjet. I’m french so i’ll try to be clear :-)
“Prejudices”. I had so many prejudices when i met my …husband for the first time !! I thought that he was high-toned, superficiel…i din’t like him at all ! why ? i don’t know !
On day, i was very sad because of love story so complicated. He simply gave me his hand… and now we are married since 7 years…
Love
Hola Paulo,
Realmente nuestro prejuicios a las cosas muchas veces están influenciados por las personas. Porque uno tiende a depender de la opinión de los demás. Cuando tuve que tomar la decisión de lo que iba a estudiar en la universidad a la primera persona que le consulte que hacer fue a mi hermano y el me dijo estudia biología. A pesar de que conseguí entrar por biología mis amistades me decían: por que estudias eso? A principio esas opiniones no me ayudaban porque me puse en la mente que la biología no era para mi y cada vez que iba a tomar una clase me decía a mi misma pero que difícil eso no es para mi y no me gusta. Hasta que hubo una clase que me hizo cambiar de opinión, gracias a un gran profesor que estimo mucho y ahora me estoy especializando en microbiología.
Con el tiempo uno se da cuenta que lo importante es no anticiparse a las cosas y ejercer una opinión de algo que uno no ha comprobado. Mas aun que uno se da cuenta de que lo que le guste a uno no le va a gustar a otra persona.
Un abrozo,
Sylvia Enid
Hola Buenos Dias
Hoy hablando de prejuicios, recuerdo que hace unos dias tenia un conflisto interno connmigo misma, vi a una sra en mi opinion muy mal vestida y su manera de expresarse , segun yo no era la mas adecuada, al mismo tiempo mi conciencia me decia que no debia jusgarla y sentì mucha pena con migo misma, por que no debia estar pensando esas cosas de una mujer que seguramente tiene mucho valor como persona y no debia jusgarla, por su manera de vestir o por educacion, desafortunadamente en nuestros paises latinoamericanos, las oportunidades de eduacion a veces son limitadas por la pobreza, ese dia me senti mal porque no me gusta gusgar a las personas, el problema es que es algo dificil de dejarlo de hacer, ME GUSTARIA SABER COMO HAGO PARA DEJAR DE HACERLO, CONCIENTE E INCONCIENTEMENTE?
GRACIAS
My dad always taught me one thing…. That I should never beleive in something or do something because he is saying so.. whatever I do in life should be because I want to do… He asked me to apply my reasoning in everything that I am doing…
- Nidhi
when you truly know
that you don´t know
your mind is in a constant flow.
and all you only need is still
what the present moment will.
simply&easily
So beautiful and true that is!
I believe that hating others is also hating yourself. Prejudices and hatred is usually a mirror on your own insecuritees , ignorance/fear or unsolved isssues. And often just moving you astray from what really matters.
When facing time in prison,I lived together with many murdereres,bankrobbers, molesters, ect. My first thougth was not to have prejudices against anybody ( they were alreay judged ,and Who was I to judge anybody, when I was a convict myself)
Offcourse I did anyway. But the more I got to know people and their life-stories, the more I realised that nothing is black and white. None of theese ladies were really bad people. Merely victims of really bad circumstances, lifes, parents, husbands ect..
( off course im not talking about not taking responsability for your actions)
I even ended up having hearts to heart theurapeutical conversations w the one who had done the worst of all. And i do belive that no one , in their soul, Are truely bad or mean- just lost..
The more you focus only on the black or white, the more you move yourself away from all the true and beautifull colours of the universe.
<3
A friend of mine once told me that,” Whenever you hate a person, there is a thing or two in him or her that you also hate about yourself.” Well, I do not really know where he got that but it actually hit me.
So maybe that is the reason why I grew up learning not to hate anyone around me because I truly love myself and that I always make it a point to appreciate each and every little positive thing that i see in a person or a thing, same goes within my own self.
I believe that hate is a superficial feeling, that one could actually get away with it and live life without hatred afterall.
I am a very optimistic person and this has helped me in handling people and things around me, after all, i do not really care how others think. So long as I know what I am doing is right and that I do not even care if my opinion would matter to others, so long as I could make a stand.
Everybody has prejudices. You hear things, you listen to other people’s storys. Of course that will be kept in your mind and do something with you, no matter if you want it or not. Recognizing prejudices as what they are, is what makes the difference.
I will never forget my mothers face 15 years ago when I told her that I was dating a Turkish guy. I could see all the horrible things she had heard about Muslims and Turks going round in her head. The whole Betty-Mahmoody-Story was coming up to her and she already saw me in a black long dress, covering my hair, my body, my personality.
But she did not say a single word! She waited until she met him for the first time and I could see her relief when she realized that he is not like that. Since then she met a lot of Turkish people, travelled to Turkey, fell in love with that country.
She is totally happy with her son-in-law and very proud of my little family.
As I am of her because she didn’t judge before making her own experiences.
And that is what makes the difference.
Beautiful, thanks Katja. To notice, is the key. To try to understand…
Four years ago, I was introduced by a common friend to a young man who had quite a reputation for his intellect and achievements in academia, in a room where people gather to study and discuss, loungingly, all topics under the sun — a gathering of inspired and inspiring young minds. This man was quite the epicentre of it all, and yet, I had no inclination to and in fact, resisted getting to know him better because a) I believed him to be arrogant because of his lauded intellect, and b) because he belonged to a geographical community that has been at war with mine and there is a great historical enmity between the two. One day, however, quite suddenly we discovered that we both are great admirers of T.S. Eliot and all of a sudden, we were talking to each other every day, all the time, online and on the phone. Over the next four years, he went on to become my best friend and my grand amour. We weathered many storms together and were able to attend to each other’s most profound pains, and it was beautiful and glorious.
Two months ago, my best friend, my beloved passed away quite suddenly. And although I am full of beautiful memories and his undying, pure love for me, I regret that my family never approved of him and never got to know him because of the prejudices that they were brought up with, prejudices that meant nothing in our love, but were difficult for them to overcome — they will never know what the world has lost, what I have lost.
Oh Anya, this is so sad. I can feel what you have lost, I can read it in every word and between the lines. And I can read that this relationship changed your life and that this was worth it.
Thanks for telling this story.
I think, as a child, I allowed others to determine my opinions, but I have always been determined, as an adult, to decide for myself. I have deliberately raised my children to have faith in their own opinions, by never suggesting that my opinion is necessarily right and always trying to offer others, encouraging them to form their own.
Thank you, Paul, for your thought-provoking post and I have really enjoyed reading the comments too.
Dear Paulo Coelho,
I would like to say thank you for your books and the way you are thinking.
It help me so much in my life.
At the first I found in one library your book,”Alchemist” and i readed it with lots of interest,the way you think and write satisfide me so much and gave me inspiration to be so strong like a rock in this life and never give up.I completely agree that difficulty is only word and I was keen to read your comment about it.
Kind Regards,
Ineta
Growing up I was bought up to believe u had 2 plan the future & 4 the future. So I did-only I spent my childhood and adolescents planning to be someone I never became. Now I am 30 & look back with a sense of devastating sadness. I am now focused on re-energising myself. I am doing what I should have done 20 years ago …learning about myself. My advise is: live in the moment, experience everything you can & be you in every version of yourself no matter what. You cannot control your future, but you can control how you feel now. I don’t remember much of my teenage years most probably coz I don’t recognise myself. I must admit that I am grateful for those experiences coz it is those hardships which has comvinces me to use energy and the power of The Secret be accepting of me with all my flaws.
I really recommend reading the book “Thought Contagion” by Aaron Lynch. It delves deeply into the concept of memes, upon which most prejudice is built in the final analysis. Blessings…
I agree with this thing about opinion – you have to have you own point of view, not because someone want to seen you thinking that way, but just because you really think so. Earlier I had some cases, when I agreed with smb just because I didn’t want to argue with him. Now I’d rather tell my truth, or say nothing.
Hello,
I Like reading you, and I find my self between you lines.
I have just one problem, I love writing, but I can’t go on, when I start someting,I let it down before I finish! I have all the ideas in my head but not structeured.
I want some advice, I want to be alive when I die! I wanna leave something behind me!
can you please help me!
start by finishing! One hundred bad stories, all first drafts will become one great story.
Hey Nawal,
try to find a ghostwriter, a lector, a co-writer. Somebody who helps you structuring your time and your work and who wants to see results.
Okay, I supposed you wanted advice from Paulo, but maybe my suggestion might be helpful too. :)
We change our mind, because we know better.
We change our mind, because we mature.
We change our mind, because we learn.
We change, when we transform.
When we see the bigger picture.
Love,
L.
for me it happens especially about movies: when a cinematographic critic says that a movie it’s good,I find out that it’s horrible and many times when he says it’s bad,I see the movie and a find out it’s wonderful! actually I think that it exists a general idea of what it can be good or bad but the real important thing I learned from this little experience it that each of us is the only person who can decide what to like and what to dislike! especially for people: if you are happy and you meet a person but you don’t trust him because it passed just few days and you ask a friend of your,you can have different answers: if your friend is not a true one,if he’s jealous he will say to you to not hang out with that person…at the contrary a good friend will say that you met a nice person and to hang out with him! the point is: the more we trust the person close to us,the most we won’t ask ourselves if this person is saying something wrong…we will trust him and maybe follow that advise! if we don’t trust the person we ask to,we won’t follow his advise…we always thing people we love have the right answer for evey question and we forget sometimes that we can face life just by ourselves!(maybe it’s something like a parent and his child: we need to be lead towards the best road and a child always believe that his parents know the answers for all!)
I have just had a phone-call from the bookstore : the ‘Warrior’s Life’ has just arrived in Cyprus. So be prepared, dear Paulo Coelho, to ‘change my mind’ about you!! I may start to … hate you, but maybe, I may love you more! YES AND NO!!! I am joking, of course.
I usually form my opinion about something or someone based on my … INUITION, which I think, is very reliable! First impression is also a good guide, because we are not .. prejudiced and there are no … afterthoughts, which are based on logic.
So I am … going to buy the book now.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Or the .. instinct of the … jungle, dear Paul!!!
Beware the big.. eats the smaller!!! ;-]
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
‘Beware the big.. eats the smaller!!! ;-]
It seems that after all I AM a Medium, dear Paul.
As a friend of mine told me once: You say things out of the blue, that … happen!
But the LAW says that injustices are going back to the sender.. seven times stronger! Magic. How to stop … Bad Karma? By sending only LOVE.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
The journey of my opinion.
when i was younger, i never had an opinion (tabula rasa;). So when my mother or friends took me out shopping for example, i did not care what i wanted to buy or wear.
But at some point in puberty, it became necessary to form an opinion. You have to think something of everything. It was like, when you don’t have an opinion, you are nobody…
So at that point, i think i started channeling other peoples opinions. First you start hurting people..
But after a while i think i got friends all over the world, because they all think i agree with them, although it is more like that i all understand them i think:)
I now defenitely feel and know for myself what is wrong or right, but i can also accept everybody for there own opinion.
The question is, do they realy know mine?;)
In my journey thus far I have changed my mind about Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland/Through The Looking Glass. Some years ago I didn’t love both these novels. BUT since my life has changed upside down, I say “Ah, that’s a great puzzle & return of Alice in a perfect ‘Hoax’!” (By the way, Hatter’s mad mind changed him so much that he can’t even trust himself.)
***
I’ve changed my mind about Michael Jackson (changed my negative frame of mind into a positive one). He really was a great singer and a great artist. Unfortunately, I discovered it just after his death (when played my Chess & listened to his “Black or White”).
***
When my dearest “Gharib” helped me to enter the “STRANGE house” of Paulo, I changed my mind about God. I do not love Him. I love Him more! As I saw there written on the wall: “Dei sub numine viget” –> Under God’s power she flourishes.
O Lucky Alice!
I dont like much Alice too, and think a friend called me that way…
But maybe is a period, or the version I saw. As I hated ScoobyDoo, or Hanah Montana. Now, after saw movie Scooby Doo, I love the cartoon too…At my age, dont know if is ok, but is fault of nephew and niece, kids, who watch tv and I must see them too…he he.
Well, I tried to recall such cases but I found that I am quite the opposite kind of person (at least based on what I can recall)
The cases are no matter whether people told me “oh, you should read that book/see that movie, it’s super.” or “that book/movie is really a waste of time”, i tended to find out those items and saw them with my own eyes and went back to people to tell them what I really thought. (I guess this is because I really dislike (from time to time, hate) people tell me what to do or what to think as well as telling things they don’t actually see as their own experience)
Well, at a much younger age (like at my teens), I might dislike a book or a movie when i didn’t really have a thought on it just because everyone loved it, which were rare cases but it happened. Also, there was one case that I did read some book and didn’t like it but everyone around me was in love with it and the medias were creazy about it so I pretended I liked the book and even searched all the works that author wrote and read.
I was always a rational man.
My study in the medical field and my work in the field of medical research, only increased my point of view that every thing in the world can be dissected to small little units (questions/problems) and consequently, can be solved and understood by logic thinking..
I applied this point of view in every aspect of my life from work to private relationships..
It tooks me years of shocks and pain and losses to realize how wrong I was..
Yes, I changed my mind and my way of looking to life..
Now I know that our logic ego (though still a very valuable tool that we have) can explain somethings but in our private way that most of the times apply only to us..
Even in the most materialistic fields of science (if this really exists) there is always a wide margin of what cannot be looked at as mere simple mental equation (1+1=2).
By this huge turn in my way of looking to life, I didn’t stop the unexpected problems and dissapoitments to cross my way but I learned to take them as a part of life that sometimes add some spices to it..
Love,
Tarek
Great analyzes Tarek. Funny, recently I did one of these tests of my interests, and scored zero on being realistic! I knew I was an idealist, but not that bad. I think of myself as very down to earth, and LOVE nature. In work life however, it seems I’m more of one of the characters in Chagall’s floating around pictures, than a carpenter! So, what profession do I pick? :)
Love & admiration,
Heart
Nice you came to the right conclusion.
Take care
Hi Tarek, with your white doctor’s uniform! White is the opposite of Black and Lawyers always wear a … black gown, revealing their .. evil, material role in … solving problems!!! ;-]
Logic is a tool for rational thinking. But each one of us is unique and our way of understanding and sensing the World is unique too. The feeling of ‘loneliness’ and ‘isolation’ is the result. But there is HOPE: to expand our senses and become ONE; To break the walls that separate us. Intuition is stronger than .. logic and LOVE is our guide.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
Oh, how the meaning “rational” thinking is mading me out. When I first started to look at things rationaly I thinked that I was right, but in reality… I loosed some very fundamental emotions of interest and even enthusiasm. Now I want to get out of that “rational” hole.
Your analysis are right in 10/10 :)
God’s created so many kind of people. God’s also created couple to make life become balance. But, why still life’s unfair to me?
to be truly honest I have to say that in case somebody forced some kind opinion upon me ( either good or bad ) about somebody /smth, then immediately the oppposite force in me arouses- a stubborn , maybe, better-knowing, or simply -let ‘s see what experience I, myself can have with this person or occasion -may have, appears…in the end let’s be honest -who should or has to tell you what you should think
but I listen to everybody what he/she has to say and make my own decisions
I think I am often against things because there are people that are so extraordinarily impressed by it. Then I get cautious and suspicious: it can’t be so extremely great, or the person cannot be soooo extremely special (we are all humans).
but some people say that things we do not like in others we have ourselves and do not like to work on it or look at it. So, this kind of “dislike” is for me a warning flag now…
In the 70s & 80s, I did not like Andy Warhol because he was so crazy and sooo absolutely modern. then I saw prints he made of endangered animals and finally also some of his originals that just “blew me away” :o).
With Pedro Almodovar’s films! I once saw Carne Tremula for the first time, I had no idea who he was. I happened to like it. After time he became more popular, people would criticize his films, for being too raw or liberated, I started watching them and I love them! I think he’s amazing! And usually I believe that when things come from the heart, either they love it or they hate it, but they feel something strong, I think that’s amazing!
2 months ago i worked with someone of Marroco.
One of my colleagues was complaining about him and
he sad he was a useless person to working with him.
Suddenly i have to work with him and was a little bit
afraid for the confrontation with the Marrocain person.
During three weeks i worked toghetter with my Marrocain colleage.
We were a beatifull team,my fear for him was caused by the prejusdice
of my other colleague. The person in question has prejusdice about
his color and his religion.
And it was a nice experience to work with Erraji Fouad .
All the negativitie was wothless.We have not always to believe
what others are saying.
Buenaventura
This might be slightly off topic because a lot of people have stuck to talking about prejudices against books and authors – following on from Paulo’s original statement.
For me, one great change in thinking that I arrived at was that life is not about suffering. I think I had been brought up with the notion that we have to suffer greatly in order to reach our ultimate goal. I don’t think this is right. It is true that life throws us challenges and it can sometimes be difficult to attain things we want but suffering as a mantra for life is pretty crappy.
I am in the process of trying to change my thinking at present. I am trying to change my career – from academia to anything that is not academia. This is a career I have fallen into and while I have loved teaching at times, I have had some pretty awful experiences. I really want to move on to something else but it’s easy to just do the same old thing – it’s a safe choice. I think I’d just like to build vegetable gardens for people.
Nossa, são tantos os casos em que isso aconteceu comigo! :) Fui criada em um meio muito “intelectual”, de forte caráter cultural, onde as cobranças e expectativas eram altas.
Já fui severamente repreendida por ler Agatha Christie, ainda menina, quando tomei gosto pela leitura. Eu esperava todo mundo dormir e me fechava no closet para ler a Sra. Christie até de madrugada.
Assim foi com Paulo Coelho, Marcelo Rubens Paiva e outros autores de que tanto gosto, que li e releio à vontade.
As visões muito estreitas nunca me afetaram diretamente, porque sempre fui muito introspectiva e pensativa, beirando a distração completa :)
Eu só não sou muito amiga de discussões e tentativas de convencer as pessoas que se alguma coisa é boa para mim, deveria ser boa para elas (lógica estranha).
A verdade é que a mesma rebeldia que me fez tão mal em alguns momentos, me salvou de ser influenciada em pontos cruciais na formação da minha sistêmica enquanto Patrícia, sem a sombra de todos antes de mim.
Ah, “esse papo meu tá qualquer coisa” :) Efeitos do Sr. Paulo queimando nossas pestanas!
Abraço e saudações pelo aniversário de sua grande companheira Christina!
The opinion of others are different of your own
opinion.I have to experience myself.
i don’t always believe what others saying ,i have
to see it by myself
Buenaventura
i do not know if it is relevant but…
Paulo’s books have always been my source of inspirations but there was something that i thought ‘impossible’…which is to follow signs. i do not know why but i thought it was for someone more enlightened and more trained and mature. or maybe chosen people. but one day, as i was chatting with my dear friend, who was also a fan of Paulo, said she was waiting for signs. i just said ‘really?’ and thought how brave she was. she was following signs! then i stared to think ‘maybe it is for everyone. if she cad do it, maybe me too…’ then, i began to look a bit more carefully. and now, at least i can notice a few signs even though it is still small things. also i saw a few dreams that really came true. so i am really hoping that one day i can really be guided by signs which are supposed to be all over around me.
i really thank her for this. hugs + kisses:)
I don’t think Your post is irrelevant. I understand it’s meaning. Your posting hints wonderfully on the fact that we have to start to think and contemplate, not blindly act against or favour something. But to listen to ourselves, what the world tells us.
We need to think on our own not to go along with things OR against things. The reason shouldn’t be not to please someone or to go against someone’s wishes, but to understand the world better and find what really is important/true/love.
Was a nice message, a very good perspective, chieko.
Be well.
The signs in my life don’t really mean to me ‘Hey, come this way!’
They’re more like
‘See! I told you beforehand I’d be here with you at this moment, I am your future, trust me completely, do what you have to do and I’ll help you out through!’
sorry for commenting something irreverent again.
well, i woke up very late this morning feeling ‘i should have woken up much earlier…’. then when i went downstairs, i heard a music coming from the radio. i vaguely had a feeling that i had heard of it before. then it became clear that i did hear it a while ago. and i noticed it was a sign. but unfortunately, i do not know its meaning. (most important part!)
one artist said in an interview that if she failed to follow one vision (she said earlier that she had a series of visions), she would end up doing it all over again. and i feel like it is true. if i did not follow one sigh, i have to repeat it again and again and it is so painful now…i feel like what is wrong with me? why i am stuck?…
well, btw, the music was ‘jesus’ blood never failed me yet’ by gavin bryars. the origin of the music is so inspiring. i like this kind of art. so i just got it from itune so that i won’t forget it, at least… maybe i’ll figure out what it means…
thanks for reading.
love
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