Changing your mind

by Paulo Coelho on November 26, 2009

As you noticed that last week I posted here “Por que odeio Paulo Coelho”. The idea came during a conversation with a friend of mine, who was talking to someone who “hates” me and my friend asked: “why?” The more the person explained, the more she got confused. While reading 709 posts I got to the same conclusion.
They hate because someone said: you should hate it. I was also caught in this trap earlier in my life, and I can remember two cases: first it was with “The Little Prince”. Everybody said, Oh it’s a very superficial book. The second time was “The Prophet” (Gibran), also because “too easy to understand”. I waste some years before reading these two masterpieces.

So I would like you to share your similar experiences. Something/someone that you had a lot prejudices and later on you said; ” it’s much better then I thought, I should have my opinion instead of having other’s opinions.”

Thank you very much,
Paulo

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{ 354 comments… read them below or add one }

BACA ROJA November 26, 2009 at 8:22 pm

El mejor guerrero es aquel que consigue transformar al enemigo en amigo.
Paulo Coelho

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cockledoodeloo November 26, 2009 at 8:15 pm

it was when I had to cook an egg.
I negated all the opinions an egg roll? no
an egg Benedict? definitively no
an omelette? nope
I hesitated was it going to be a hard boiled one? or a soft-boiled one?
The decision then was easy to make – the soft boiled one;it took less time
Time was the essence.. ;)

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Tina November 26, 2009 at 11:16 pm

thank you for the laugh;)))

Hope November 26, 2009 at 7:04 pm

Have you seen the movie DOUBT? It is about both Gossip and changing minds :)

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Karthik Jain November 26, 2009 at 5:33 pm

I dont know why i am writing this. I was browsing and arrived here accidentally, and also i was reading this simultaneously:

“No superintelligence (not even God perhaps) could know the exact positions and momenta of all the particles of the universe at a given moment because the particles do not have exact positions and momenta at the sametime (the Heisenberg uncertainty principle); hence their future behavior is not precisely predictable or determined.” –
Robert Kane – A CONTEMPORARY INTRODUCTION TO FREE WILL

I feel There is a connection.(My Opinion!)

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Fabrício November 26, 2009 at 12:26 pm

Olá Paulo, boa idéia deste post… deixe-me pensar um pouco sobre o assunto. Não conseguido me lembrar de nada no momento, geralmente eu vou pela minha opinião mesmo…
Abrações!

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Catherine E.A. November 26, 2009 at 12:12 pm

Some other changes -
had had bad circle of friends who my mother asked me, if I was sure they were the right kind of people for me…
I would say, yes, yes of course..
but of course those friends turned on me and scorned me after a while..
I changed my mind. Moved out of my shared flat with two of them and started a new social life at uni in my last year. Then at my second uni course, for a masters degree, i found a new set of friends… broad minded, loving and wonderfully funny. I felt blessed.

I changed my mind about how i felt about my stepfather within the first year. I had been made to feel like i should hate him. But actually it wasn’t the case. I didn’t know him..
no, in fact… i hated having lost my voice, my exclusivity, my private space at home. But by nightfall i had decided how to confront my anger and make ammends.

I change my mind a lot about when it is best to “go for something”… i wait for the right time, moment, conditions, settings…etc…
If it is all right.. i go. If not, i revise my plans.

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marie-christine November 26, 2009 at 12:10 pm

interesting what you are saying because I have always had my own opinion about lots of things however no one ever listen to it, always dismissed it. Still, I keep at it because it makes sense to me.
thank you for sharing.;)

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Ekaterina Evstaphyeva November 26, 2009 at 6:33 am

May be my example will seem to be funny. It is about my favourite music. A friend of mine like to listen Marilyn Manson and before I used to say ” what a crasy freak this Marilyn Manson ! He is not normal all he do and all he sing is disgusting, people say he is satanist he kills animals on his concerts !” Than one day I have decided to forget how does he look like and what roumors I heard about him just take his CD and just LISTEN. And I sturted like his music !!!! Now I am a big fan of Marylin Manson !

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chieko November 26, 2009 at 4:55 am

i have a long list of this topic. one of them is tv sitcom ‘friends’. i did not like to watch it, because of the reason below, but it was such a boring day that i thought i wanted to cheer myself up. and thought maybe a lot of laugh would help.
then i watched it. i laughed until i cried. it was so funny. and i was happy with the ending too.
i did not like to watch it because the love was treated in the way i did not like.
at first, there is a guy who likes a girl who is a bit out of his league. so he almost gives up his love. i do not like that. then there is love that is doubted. i do not want to doubt love. finally, there is love that is denied! i do not like it at all! i just cannot believe people deny love! burying it deep in his heart. i cannot do such a thing.
i grew up reading fairy tales such as cinderella and little mermaid many many times. and i think i unconsciously concluded that if i want to have ‘happily ever after’, i have to keep love in a sacred place and nurture it because it is so special. what i mean by nurturing is like maybe taking care of it very well. so it should not be neglected. so i was afraid that if i watch the sitcom, i would feel like it would violate my love that i have been nurturing.
well, i guess tv is just for fun. but i still do not understand that complicating love story is accepted by the mass. i think love should be simple. when i fall in love, i write a love letter and if he has the same feeling we go out right away. so simple.
maybe because there are many kinds of love…?
back to this topic, so i usually skip things that are against me or my idea but when i try it i find it is fun. so that means that i might be missing lots of fun out there…?
anyway, thanks for reading
love

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Caroline November 26, 2009 at 2:02 am

About works of art I can not remember not having my own opinion, it’s quite evident for me.
So it is with many things, people in general for instance.

There is something that could apply here: how I changed my opinion regarding the general concept of “poverty”… Don’t most of you immediately feel some pitty when imagining poor people, poor countries, etc.?
A trip to India – where I sincerely thought I might never go in my life, wondering how I would react to extreme poverty and not the least fascinated by the famous indian spirituality…
In the very first days there, wandering among Bombay/Mumbai slums on my trips in cabs, I’ve seen (and felt) the most noble persons I’ve ever seen on earth, living under a plastic tarpaulin during monsoon. Just to give an example of the dozens of experiences I lived there which made me change my mind about “poverty” forever.
I don’t say it’s great to be poor, or that these people are happier than I am (now quite wealthy and full of gratitude for it), I just experienced the difference between economical misery and moral misery, and that economic misery does NOT mean moral misery, as all the media tend to make us think.
Now I’m quite hangry everytime I hear about “poor Africa” for instance, this call for pitty, and people don’t imagine all the richness there, human, social, cultural, natural and economic as well (not all african people starve!)
I almost cried of emotion when, at a concert by a malian musician in Paris, commenting about the sad feeling he gets many time from people here – dressing dark colors, worried and so on – he said he believes that “the mission of Africa, is to save the world” ****

More generaly I realize I changed my mind about the medias, mass medias and the TV in particular. I can no longer believe that what they say is full truth, they simplify situations to there maximum and always tend to show the ugliest, probably because it’s more spectacular and sells more. They vehicule stereotypes and narrow people points of view. So first I don’t take what they say for granted, then I try to widden my sources (good newspapers help to have a wider point of view) or check things personaly.
I hope you won’t think I’m naive and don’t want to see ugly things. I just think there are already so many ugly things and situation, we shouldn’t allow them to destroy everything, showing only the ugly angle.

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hend bouaziz November 26, 2009 at 12:51 am

I like yr example of the little prince. i wasnt in a hurry to read this book precisely, and then I did by coincidence and it captured me to the point that I read it in all the languages I could understand trying each time to catch its subtilities.

the same thing happened with you. For long years, I didnt want to read Paulo Coelho, because of all the advertising on the writer. I had the feeling that reading Paulo Coelho was one more step through consumerism.
Also, i didnt want to read a writer simply because that’s what the others do.

I think advertising and marketing kill the “credibility” of a writer. to be sold an idea still sounds strange for me. I never read best sellers. I need sthg more consistent.

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Debby Tamez November 25, 2009 at 10:18 pm

I always had the preconcieved notion that you could only fall in love one time in your life. Being married for 13 years I honestly believed that he was it. Imagine my surprise when our 13 year marriage came to an end 5 months ago… I now believe that there is someone out there that I will fall in love with again someday. I now believe that sometimes we have to go through certain experiences to be able to get to where we need to be. It might not be what we necessarily want, but it’s what we need! Someday when I am all healed and whole again, I know that love will happen for me again, however, I will not wear those rose colored glasses anymore.

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Mari Ann November 25, 2009 at 9:56 pm

What I say is – it is his choice. He is free to choose. He is the one on the pedestal.

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Mon November 25, 2009 at 9:48 pm

Eu estava lendo os comentarios de porque odeio Paulo Coelho. Um livro ou qualquer que seja a obra pode falar mais ou menos a uma pessoa. Mas que nao-leitores escrevam que seus livros sao para pessoas com baixa estima, pouco estudo e sem amor a vida é de uma ignorancia sem limite. Que educaçao pode ter recebido esse nao-leitor para sentir-se tao superior a outras pessoas! O que ele sabe da vidas dos outros, dos sim-leitores. Esse é o maior prejuízo que podemos ter, julgar-se melhor que os demais.

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Mari Ann November 25, 2009 at 9:30 pm

I don’t understand everything here now. But I do understand I don’t want him to get hurt. I’d rather let go.

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Alex Sandra UK November 25, 2009 at 9:25 pm

I’ve just been out for dinner and realised that one of the biggest things that I have prejudices against is food. I judge food by the look, nationality, texture or colour. I even decide whether I like it or not by the name of the dish. All of this greatly distorts my mind as to whether or not I will try it. I realised tonight that I am very bad at trying new foods, even though more often than not when I have tried something new, it becomes a favourite!! I made a decision tonight never ever to judge food again so harshly!!!!

x

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Rashid Akeem November 25, 2009 at 7:31 pm

I remember just about a year ago it was when i had just gained a level of recognition for my poetry. There was a friend of mine who had never taken the time to read my work but made the statement that i cant take you seriously as a poet. I asked why they told just because i know the real you. The statement at first made me fustrated then i question if it were true. Does this person who says they know the real me really know me or is just full of pride and bullshittin themselves.

I asked how can you say that and not read my work, work that i express a side of me i find it hard to show people in any other way but poetry. so i dismissed my friends notion of knowing the real me until they read pieces of my work.

later on my friend returned to me after reading a few pieces and told me they never knew i thought like that and said they related with one of my peices. But still my question can someone really and trully know the REAL you i dont believe it is possible. i dont even know the real me everyday im discovering new things about myself.

The statement “I know the real you” i believe is foolish and false. sorry if i went off topic, lol.

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Caroline November 26, 2009 at 1:20 am

Dear Rashid,
We’ve been talking a lot here about wearing masks or trying to please others, etc.
I think this statement “I know the real you” applies somehow to people who tend to offer the face and attitudes they imagine people expect from them. Hence “I know the real you”
Now I fully agree with you that no one can ever know “the real us”, because it’s something hugely wide and complex and changing.
Hearing that, I suffer a bit because I can’t help feeling defined and reduced. But my heart also appreciates that someone on this planet really understands a true part of me, which is a nice feeling;)

Best, Caroline

chieko November 27, 2009 at 4:54 am

thank you Rashid for sharing your story.
i feel the same way. i mean i am also in a process of knowing myself and i would be surprised if someone has already known me. haha.
but i think there are some people who are really intuitive (maybe like you because you are trained artist so you are more sensitive to notice something real…) and they can really reveal me. it happened to me and i could not say a ward because i was so surprised.
back to your story, i do not know what they meant by real you either but i guess everyone has entitle to say anything…sorry kind of irresponsible reply…
i just hope lots of blessings to you!
love
chieko

Meryem November 25, 2009 at 6:48 pm

Hi Paulo,

While I was studying Enlish Literature and Humanities, I had a little prejudice against your book. My professors who were the main cause for my prejudice, used to ironically say that “The Alchemist” would be an example for main stream pop literature. It honestly put me off and I hadn’t much interest in reading your books. It took me around five years, many postmodern novels (like beloved) and Jacques Derrida’s writings to figure out that the value of a piece of writing doesn’t lay in the difficulty of the language. I figured out that great thinkers made their thoughts available in simple language to convey their message to all people. One day (in a time of real sorrow and suffering) my best friend ‘gifted’ me with the Alchemist. I started reading it only and only to escape my pain and my thoughts. The language was easy to follow (I didn’t need a special terminology dictionary), the story line was quite clear, so it was an easy way to escape my reality. Towards the end of the book, while reading suddenly my mind started reciting the passage of the boy transforming into the wind…so I went back reread this passage (I don’t know how many times)That was it I ordered all the books I had missed out before and I went back to my professors telling them “Great minds use simple language” and “Literature is for all people to enjoy themselves and get something out of it”!!!

Ever since I haven’t listened to anyones opinion on anything. If time allows I read the book or watch the film being criticized. If not I just keep in mind that it is the opinion of a person and not me.

Love Meryem

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elaine November 26, 2009 at 7:53 am

What she said!!!

Thanks Meryem,

Keith November 25, 2009 at 5:49 pm

Don’t like Alice! I assume the references are to Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll. Try reading the two books. They are brilliant, an incredible play on words.

I remember a large illustrated book when I was child and visited my grandmother. Probably an original edition. I do not know what happened to it.

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Savita Vega November 25, 2009 at 5:41 pm

This experience, I have had, most often in reference to people. Numerous times have I been told, before meeting a person, that their company should be avoided for one reason or another. Generally, I find that the more people who share this opinion and voice it openly, the greater are the chances that this individual is going to be someone whom I will actually admire and like very much. In fact, it usually ends up that the person giving me the “warning” is the one I find annoying and whose company I’d rather avoid. I can think of numerous examples of this, but I’ll give just three:

In college there was this creative writing professor whom I had been told was a “monster” who gobbled people up and spat them out. “Whatever you do, just don’t take a class with him!” I was told. So, of course, the first thing I did was sign up for the first class of his that I could find. It didn’t take long for me to see why people hated him. Within a week, I saw the first student run, crying hysterically, out of his classroom. But he wasn’t a “monster” at all; he was actually a wonderful teacher. Where he came into conflict with some of his students was at the point where their own egos became either too inflated or too fragile to sustain honest criticism of their creative work. The students who demanded only positive feedback (devoid of constructive criticism) were the ones who hated him. He wasn’t the type to say “this is great” just to make someone feel good. If the piece needed to be altered drastically, or even thrown out altogether, he voiced his opinion clearly. As a result, I learned a great deal from him, as, above all, I knew that the feedback he was giving me was honest and sincere and that he genuinely meant to make a better writer of me, even at the cost of bursting the bubble of my ego now and then. He was probably one of the best professors I ever had.

The second example involves a relative who was married into my family – my niece by marriage. Due to the fact that I lived far away, it was several years before I actually met her face to face. By then, I had been told all sorts of negative things about her, primarily by my brother, who seemed to think that his son had mistakenly chosen a wife who just a terrible person. When I finally did meet her, however, we hit it off almost immediately and have been close friends ever since. And yet I can clearly see why my brother and other members of the family have a negative opinion of her: First, she refuses to conform to others’ ideas of who and how she should be; secondly, she is very unapologetic for this refusal to conform; and, thirdly, she is ever steadfastly determined to show her true self, whether anyone else appreciates that or not. For this reason, among others, I admire her a great deal and count her as a fabulous person to be around, one whose company I always enjoy.

The third example involves the CEO of a company for whom I was once employed. Similar to the situation with the professor mentioned above, I was warned, from the start, by numerous people, to avoid her at all costs. However, after a promotion, she ended up being my direct boss, and there was no way that I could “avoid” her. I was terrified the first day I walked into her office, due to the numerous horror stories I had been told. However, within a few weeks, I came to understand the essence of the conflict she had with some of her employees. First, she demanded excellence – that is, she demanded that a person be willing to EXCEL BEYOND that which they originally thought themselves capable. She gave her employees the support and resources they needed to achieve this, but what she was looking for was the WILLINGNESS to excel. Secondly, she demanded integrity. She would ask, “What specifically do you think you can achieve? And what resources to you need to achieve it?” Then, once that agreement was reached, she expected the individual to achieve the specified goal, on time, and without fail. Some people thought that she was too hard, too demanding – a sort of slave-driver wearing a suit. I thought she was amazing, not only as a boss, but as a sort of mentor – an example of what is humanly possible. As a boss, she was always very clear in her expectations, and, at the same time, enormously supportive. As an individual, she lived a life in example that there is really very little that a person cannot achieve once they set their mind upon it.

Given those three examples, and the many more I have experienced which are very similar, I have learned that it is usually the very people whom I am told to avoid that turn out to be the greatest friends and mentors in my life. So, any time I hear a lot of people saying, “Oh, stay away from that person,” I make a point to meet them and get to know them as quickly as I can. Usually I find that the warnings and negative opinions are quite the opposite of the opinion I will arrive at on my own.

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Mariëlle November 25, 2009 at 7:40 pm

So true…

hope you had a great birthday Savita!!!

Much love,
Mariëlle

Valbona November 25, 2009 at 5:38 pm

one of my prejudices: men never change.
i don’t believe when a man says that he has changed…

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Anca November 26, 2009 at 11:08 pm

because the actions are the ones we need to believe :)

Barcelona_20_euros_en_un_cafe November 25, 2009 at 5:13 pm

I change my mind in some times.
With a city: The first time that I’ve been in Berlin I thought that the city was so dark and cold. Now I like it (I’ve been two times more).
With a book. The Lord of the rings. My friends read this book and said me that’s amazing. I read it with this oppinion in my head but only once time. Read it was a hard work for me…And in the opposite case, “Cien años de soledad” by Gabriel Garcia Marquez wasn’t popular between my friends. Everybody tell me that’s a boring book. But I read it six times (along my life). Conclusion: My friends and I haven’t the same oppinion about the books :-)

Kisses,

Miriam

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Mira November 25, 2009 at 4:45 pm

One follows others’ opinions when what they have an opinion on is low on one’s values, but when something is important to a person, one will follow one’s own opinion.

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maria emilia November 25, 2009 at 2:09 pm

Querido Paulo,

Isso acontece direto comigo no final do ano por exemplo quando sai a lista dos melhores e piores fimes. As vezes eu adorei o filme e ele está classificado como ruim e vice-versa. Acho que o gosto e as preferências de uma pessoa não poderiam ser julgadas, cada um com seu cada um.

Beijos

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Heloisa November 25, 2009 at 2:05 pm

“Il mondo é bello perché é diverso” That’s what italian people say. In my opinion, people should accept better new ideas from others and talk about it as friends, and be fine. So many people like to say “Oh I think this is wrong” maybe is not wrong is just different from them. I love to know new people, new culture, know how different religions works, etc.. And nobody needs to like the same thing I like, that would be boring!

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savie karnel November 25, 2009 at 1:28 pm

Thank You Paulo, you have helped me many times. Your books are a great inspiration.

Love and gratitude to you,

Savie

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hazel v. November 25, 2009 at 1:19 pm

I heard someone or was it that I read somewhere that ‘the only permanent thing in life is change’.. I do agree with it..

I am so grateful for all the changings of mind that I did in the past..When I first got married,I vowed to remain married and I did my best to cope with the abuse. “Till death do us part”, I heard myself said that, so I wanted to be true to my words.. But I have changed my mind although it took me awhile to break my promise..I’m glad I changed my mind and glad that I have the right to change my mind…

I got baptised in one of those organised christian religion and vowed to do what their told me to do…but I changed my mind becaused I want to become spiritually connected not only with them but with all my fellow humans no matter what realigions they may have.. I was told that I have become a part of the world now that i no longer associate with “God’s people”…

Changing our minds leads us to ‘freedom’.. but it depends on what it is that we change our minds to…there is an enourmous responsibility attatched to changing minds..Changing minds mustn’t taken lightly…it is a part of responsible decision making…

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mangga_oga November 25, 2009 at 12:39 pm

For me, my mind is my first challenge in myself. It’s like mirrors that control everything in our life especially in my social life. My mind never stops thinking even I’m sleeping. I always said to myself that I want the other people accept the way I’m but in the end, it’s hard…..prejudice in something made me realized that it’s hard to please everybody. In the end, you’re the one who made decision about what is bad and good about yourself. People judgments only a source or gadget that help you to improve your mind. It’s a brain twister or some source in building our mind perception about several thing that influence us. For me, our mind is creating imaginations about everything that happens in our life and explains it in a way we think about something. The way you think is the way you life. That’s my perception about this conversation. Nobody perfect…different people, different type of thinking so, don’t made other people control the way you think because, it will stuck you in the middle of your personality and characteristic. Hard being yourself if you always judge other people prejudice about yourself. TQ.

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Kathleen November 25, 2009 at 11:52 am

My father always brought me up to think for myself, never assume, don’t generalise. So I ended up learning never to listen to anyone lol – then I would argue with my father and he probably regretted teaching me to think for myself tee hee

I have though, changed my mind about people. People whom I originally didn’t like, I learnt to like.

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Dave November 25, 2009 at 11:25 am

I am reminded of the quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson, “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.”

Changing my mind has been the process of growing up. Most of my prejudices stemmed from my childhood and my family. Like most children, I regurgitated what my parents thought and said. These people and things were good, while those others are bad, etc. etc.
My family wanted me to go follow the “traditional” paths to success (doctor, lawyer, engineer). Yet, they were materially successful and spiritually poor. Why would I want to follow their example when they were miserable?

Choosing how I wanted to see and interact with the world has made things better than I had ever believed possible.

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Lucrecia November 25, 2009 at 10:44 am

Numerous times I must be or have been prejuciced, but nothing has been more harmful then listening to another persons prejudices.
I have the experience some people come on strong with their ideas and sometimes I do as they say, mostly because I am not alert enough to rekect waht they say, although I had already decided to do otherwise.
This is a bad habit of mine. I will tell you why. For example, as a student, i stopped using a certain medicine against epilepsia (I had or might occasionally have a mild form), i took it since i was a 8 year old.
I did not consult a doctor because I already knew what they would say: go on taking it, and they would not tell me anyting about the (side)effects of the medicin because they are not known, at least they are not scientifically proven as (side)effects and for that they are officially not known.
Then a girl staying in the student house where I was living (she did not have a room of her own yet and we had a large house in the centre of the city) urged me to go to her fathers hospital because she said I was being dangerous in not conuslting any one.
So I went. Bad idea. The medicine guy I saw told me a lot of bull shit, it has harmed me severely for years and years. Had I not gone, I would have listened more carefully to my body and brain that were struggling to leave the former influence of the neurodrugs. Picture this, I was 22 years old, had been taking it since age of 8, it knew nothing without them.
Now I know what the stupid medicine guy said which was all wrong, all wrong. He said I had nothing to be afraid of, there was no epilepsia at all, I could do as I pleased, and said former doctors had been wrong for all my life.
He by the way did prescribe a medicine but I left i there in the hospital. I would no longer take any neurodrug in my life.
Because of what he said, I thought I had bee taking these medicine for nothing, all those years. I was so angry.
I left my country and studies abroad for 2 years.
Then I started to experiecne severe problems of health and with my memory. I could not reproduce what I had done the day before.
I had so much information in my head, I could not proces it.
It has harmed my memory and I needed the last 15 years to recover all of its functions – in which I have succeeded.
By the way, I needed to find out by my self how to do recovber my memory, and also that the medicine-guy had been wrong in everything he had said – he would not admit anything before I could prove it.
In the end – after years – I found out he was not certified to have treated me that day I came along, his former chief of staff informed me about it. He was unexperienced, unqualified to read EEG reports, and still in education as a specialist doctor.
God, I wish I had never ever listend to that girl in my house, she was only a (non-paying) guest, she was no good, and I should have listened to my own heart and mind, instead of her stupid and innocent advise.
I should have listened to my prejudice.

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Mariëlle November 26, 2009 at 2:08 am

Dear Lucrecia, what a horror story!
But am very glad your are alive and fit and healthy this day to share it with us.
I would say : always follow your instincts… but with doctors it’s hard.
Having dealed with an awful lot of sicknesses in my family I unfortunatly found out that even qualified doctors are WRONG about half of the time, if not more often. And I don’t even want to talk about all the mistakes that are being made… mistakes that mean the difference between life and death for the person involved. And even with the diagnoses; two people in my direct surroundings have been diagnosed with cancer, to than months later have an operation to remove it, to than when waking up hear that it was not cancer.
Doctors are just human off course… but you do trust their opinions and diagnoses… if not; who else can you trust? Doctors can do wonderful things, but can also ruin somebodys life without much concequences at all for the doc itself.

Anyway, thank you for your story!
Love and trust,
Mariëlle

Adriana November 25, 2009 at 7:00 am

I think, prejuice is about fear, we judge someone when we don’t know him and feel fear about the other person. I really beleive in the human race, i beleive that we can be all we want, the people can be good or bad and is not about race, religion, nationalities, skin color… I always try to not judge nobody because if i do it i can loose a very great oportunity of learn a lot of things and teach another, life is more beautiful when you aware you know a lot of diferent people and learn about new cultures, can be very funny and interesting always remember keep the respect by the other, then just go away and take your chance don’t be afraid :-)

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elaine November 25, 2009 at 5:27 am

Hello,

I am a teacher of theatre and English. It is my job to help students to start seeing with new perspectives so that they can be productive individuals. In other words, help them to be confident to change their minds if need be. To do this, I teach my theatre kids my version of “the viewpoints” which are basically some of Paulo’s lessons learned and shared in his book “THE PILGRIMAGE,” only “the viewpoints” are taught using the stage as the world. It works!!!

The English year (16 year-olds) starts out with the class reading and intently discussing THE ALCHEMIST. I teach the kids that a book can be simple but deep, and that they have to look deeply into themselves to gain the immense spiritual value found within THE ALCHEMIST. My students love this book!!! So do I?
Today as I was closing class, I told them just a little about the beginning of VERONIKA DECIDES TO DIE. The kiddies were hooked!

PAULO, WHEN IS “VERONIKA” COMING TO THE WESTERN UNITED STATES? I have and will have viewers at ready!!!

I am trying to “Pay it Forward” after having learned so much from you and your books. This girl’s mind is open for change and new adventures.

Love and warmth to all,
Lainee

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chieko November 27, 2009 at 5:05 am

thank you Lainee for sharing your experiences in your class.
it really sounds interesting and fun.
i am particularly interested in the viewpoints, what is it?
The Pilgrimage is my favorite and i read it numerous time. but i do not know what viewpoints are…i guess it means changing your minds…?
love
chieko

Franciska November 25, 2009 at 4:38 am

prejudices on book? often. I can’t help but to judge the book by it’s cover. But when it comes to the Author that I like, I wouldn’t care much what people say, I’d buy them and enjoy reading them to the last pages. :)

On people thou, I’m the kind of person who would want to spend time/ take my own time getting to know someone before determining whether or not they are as everyone said (no matter what people say, good/bad) cuz i believe every single person is who they are because of what they’ve been through and what they are preparing themselves to experience. Their attitude towards life and others has a lot to do with their surrounding and what they are familiar with. So yeah, I don’t like having prejudices towards anyone, even though they might take my sincerity to their advantage (if it turns out they are as what people said).

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María Patricia Taboada Reyes November 25, 2009 at 4:20 am

PREJUZGAMOS, ERROR QUE COMETEMOS POR CREER LO QUE ESCUCHAMOS Y POR DEJARNOS LLEVAR POR LA APARIENCIA DE ALGO O ALGUIEN, DEBEMOS DARNOS TIEMPO PARA PROBAR Y COMPROBAR LO QUE SEA DE NUESTRO INTERÉS Y PODER FORMAR UNA OPINIÓN PROPIA…A MI ME DECÍAN “PARA QUE ESCRIBES EN EL FACEBOOK DE PAULO COELHO ES IGUAL DE INDIFERENTE QUE LOS DEMAS PERSONAJES IMPORTANTES” AFORTUNADAMENTE DECIDÍ PROBAR Y COMPROBAR Y HEME AQUÍ DISFRUTANDO DE TUS ENSEÑANZAS DE VIDA POR MEDIO DE TUS LIBROS, COMENTARIOS Y REFLEXIONES.
DISFRUTO MUCHO CUANDO NOS HABLAS POR MEDIO DE VIDEOS, SIENTO QUE ESTÁS AQUÍ EN MÉXICO EN UNA CHARLA DE AMIGOS,GRACIAS POR EL TIEMPO QUE NOS DEICAS A TUS FANS….TE ADMIRO MUCHÍSIMO..CON CARIÑO… MARÍA PATRICIA.

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Luisana November 25, 2009 at 2:59 am

Thank God, I’ve been able to share opinions and have friends of different religions,and this fact has made understand that “God is too big to fit into one religion” (i saw this quote on a Ricky Martin’s t-shirt), and that noone is the owner of truht.So I’ve learned that is much better to learn about other religions rather that just criticize them or judge people for their beliefs.

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anton November 25, 2009 at 1:51 am

well, I know I have my prejudices: to someone I prejudice too much; to me, someone does the same: the best way to work on it (I think) is to EXPRESS your opinion.

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Theresa Goubran-Keshta November 25, 2009 at 1:35 am

“Changing your mind…”

I have changed my mind many times in my life. The most memorable was when I decided to leave the convent! I had been there for 15 years and had made permanent commitments (vows). It took me 3 years to reach my decision, but I didn’t tell anyone until a few months before.

When the news came out, people bombarded me with criticism. My family said they would disown me (which they did)! “What will people think?” they said, “Life in the convent is more secure!” A lot of people said that after all that time, I would never make it on my own in the world! The harshest criticism came from the Congregation and they did all in their power to make me feel guilty. “Think of all the good you could be doing…God won’t love you any more!” The final straw came when they accused me of using the Congregation to finance my studies !

Anyway, I went ahead with my decision. Although my journey since then has been tough at times, I have never regretted following my conscience, because in doing so, I found myself and my inner freedom and I wouldn’t swap that for anything!

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Alex Sandra UK November 25, 2009 at 2:07 am

You are an inspiration.
Alex

Mariëlle November 25, 2009 at 2:12 am

Its just amazing that they actually say things like that! “God won’t love you anymore!” How do they come up with those conclusions!!!

Must have been a big change for you though, to leave the convent after 15 years, good for you you followed your heart

Love

Heart November 25, 2009 at 2:16 am

Dear Theresa,

You probably felt like any married couple who decides to divorce too. The struggle to give up something one once believed so strongly, but later simply changes.

Ops, dinner here …have to run…sorry :)

LOve,
Heart

Rosa November 25, 2009 at 7:28 am

What an interesting story, thanks so much for sharing it

Hanan Diab November 25, 2009 at 10:15 am

Courageous heart … am inspired …

Love

Hanan

THELMA November 25, 2009 at 10:57 am

Dear Theresa, thank you for sharing your story.
Every human being is born FREE. Others make us ‘prisoners’ and the crimes committed by people IN THE NAME OF GOD and FOR THE FEAR OF GOD have created vast unhappiness in the World.
GOD IS LOVE. I am never afraid of HIM. I am really scared of the EVIL that resides in people’s hearts and minds: the shadows that try to cover the LIGHT. But wherever there IS Light, EVIL is dissolved.
Be Happy, FREE and FLY.
God bless you always.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx

Kathleen November 25, 2009 at 11:47 am

I hate the words “what will people think” – who cares what people think, they should mind their own business. I have this battle with my mother sometimes and I love her to death.

It was good that you made an honest decision. There is no point being a nun if your heart is not in it. I don’t believe God likes people who do things for appearances sake.

Good for you.

savie karnel November 25, 2009 at 1:24 pm

Hi Theresa,

I understand what you would have gone through for I too had to face somewhat similar discouraging stand of the Church, when I married a Hindu. Here, in India, religious borders are very strong. The Catholics here who were converted by the Portuguese are staunch and treat all other religions as fake. When I decided to marry a Hindu, and Christianity, I was told things like, “Jesus would not love you,” “You are betraying the true God,” and things like that. You may feel mixed marriage is no big deal, but in small towns in India it is a very big deal. If you are a girl, its a bigger deal.

My father had taught me not to be prejudiced and I grew up listening stories of various mythologies and stories from the holy texts of several religious.

He also encouraged me to follow my heart. Hence, like other parents he did not insist me on becoming a doctor or engineer. In fact, I was influenced by the people around me and wanted to be an engineer. My Dad knew my heart better than me and asked me to pursue humanities. I didnt care and began to prepare for engineering entrance, and as he expected I fared very bad.

Instead of being angry he told me to choose the subjects in which I would be comfortable and I chose literature.

He died before the battles in my life began. After his death, all the people around me were prejudiced who wanted me to take up a clerks job in a government office, which they thought was best for me and “secure.” My mom was influenced by them wanted me to be secure since I had become the bread winner.

I kind of ran from home, not exactly, but fooled them and came to the city. I coudn’t pursue my studies to fulfill my dream of getting into something related to writing.

I had to make ends meet, so I worked in a call centre in Bangalore. The work got on my nerves for that was not what I wanted to do. At that time, I happened to read the Alchemist, which inspired me to take another chance.

I walked into a newspaper office and said I wanted to be a reporter. I had no formal education in journalism. Maybe the universe conspired with me and the editor took me as an intern and promised a job if I performed well. I worked for two months without any pay, but lived on the little savings that i had. After that I was a staff reporter and was paid as much as those from reputed journalism schools.

After being a full time journalist for two years, I have taken another chance. I have left my job, married a Hindu and live in a desert village. Now, I am pursuing my dream of being a writer. I pray the universe conspires with me again.

Love,

Savie

pariza November 26, 2009 at 11:29 am

My dear Theresa,

You are such an inspiration. At the moment, I’m just about to take a “U-turn” in my life. Leave my career and all the convenience behind and decide to share more time with my kids, start doing my artwork, etc. which never been tried before.
Reading your post make me believe (again) my strength…I know the journey will be tough, but I’m sure it will enjoyable :)

Love, Offie.

Catherine E.A. November 25, 2009 at 12:21 am

predujices?
well i had a hard time liking my stepmother in the long run… and it wars more than me just being a stubborn daughter. But just within a year or me deciding that i really shouldn’t have given her 80% a go… rather 200% a go.. and she dumped my father in a cruel way.
SO i figure, i half had changed my mind.

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Rosalina November 25, 2009 at 12:20 am

O diário de Um Mago, me fez ter vontade de fazer o Caminho de Santiago mas o Alquimista mudou meu olhar sobre a Vida, os prismas pelos quais a olhamos. Sempre te admirei. Minha primeira opinião mudou mas mudou para ainda melhor. Tive este problema de ser quase ridicularizada na adolescência quando dizia que o Petit Prince – li na Aliança Francesa – tinha aberto minha mente para a existência de um novo Mundo. O Mundo Espiritual. Isso, na década de 60, aos 13, 14 anos, era absurdo. Este era o livro que todas as misses diziam ter lido. Mas eu banquei minha opinião, a despeito da opinião dos outros. O Profeta tb. Foi tb onde pela primeira vez, ouvi que nossos filhos não são nossos mas sim, do mundo. Te admiro profundamente. Abçs

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Elizabeth November 25, 2009 at 12:00 am

Paulo, Very intriguing question. It seems that I have changed my mind many times and do so continuously. The more we learn and experience in our own lives, the more we question our previous conceptions of the world. I think PEOPLE are the thing that I have most changed my mind about. The more we can empathize with another person’s life experiences the less we can judge. This may be why we need to keep an OPEN mind and why learning and experience trump old beliefs. Oh and yes, I have changed my mind about MYSELF many times too.

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Jhonathan November 24, 2009 at 11:59 pm

the masculine gender has always been a figure of power and straightness so that´s why he/she has always been associated to this gender, most of us prefer to call God with Him for respect …Thank u .

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Kimberly Lawson K November 24, 2009 at 11:30 pm

Ahh! I love the thoughts & memories this brings back Mr. Coelho!!

My mother always told me to read “To Kill A Mockingbird” and I always would tell her “I don’t want to read that OLD book, it’s not cool, etc. etc.” and I also was assigned to read “The Old Man and The Sea” amoung other titles but didn’t want to read it because a friend had told me it was boring and that I would hate it.

In both situations, after I gave them a chance and read them, I loved them. Both were wonderful stories with amazing life lessons that I cherish to this day.

In “The Old Many And The Sea” I still recall the feeling of being profoundly heartbroken for Santiago. We all have had something in our grasp and tried desparately to hold on to it, whether it be love, hate, money, ideals, people, fame, envy etc. the list goes on and on. The life lesson about struggle and holding on was right there in a simple novella that I might have missed because I was “holding on” to what others had said and the conclusions they came to.

Even though we prejudge, I think eventually there comes a point where we want to experience and decide for ourelves or a situation presents itself and you are forced to make your own inference whether you like it or not.

I thankful that I changed my mind to this day…

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gabriela de Argentina November 24, 2009 at 11:27 pm

A QUESTION:

WHY DO YOU USUALLY WEAR BLACK???

JAJAJA

KISSES!!!♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪

GABRIELA.

♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪

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Paulo Coelho November 25, 2009 at 1:49 am

it is easy

Kathleen November 25, 2009 at 11:49 am

I barely ever wear black. I love colour. I’m childish like that.

gabriela de Argentina November 24, 2009 at 11:22 pm

Es bastante común que la gente tome las cosas, las personas, las situaciones con ciertos prejuicios… esto se debe a preconceptos inlusive al miedo que nos genera lo desconocido. Cuando nos enfrentamos a lo nuevo o desconocido, es en ese momento en que uno toma conciencia de la realidad.

Es una de las tantas formas de aprender, me parece, lo ideal sería no tener preconceptos.

Y es parte de la mentalidad y las ideas, lo bueno es aprender a permitirnos que las cosas fluyan solas, enfrentarlas y conocer a los demás tal cual son.

Cuando tengo una duda, intento preguntarle a la otra persona y evitar una idea errónea.

Todo forma parte de aprendizaje.

Un beso, Paulo

Me encantó verte en el video (sigo ejercitando mi inglés) ♫♪ ♫♪

♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪♫♪ ♫♪

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Aisha November 24, 2009 at 10:32 pm

The Prince and The Prophet are masyterpieces – these are two books , I ll alway gift them- i think everyone deserves to read them . I am glad you read them

for me , I used to always judge books by their covers or first few lines for that matter – i would quickly lose interst – not aware of hat I might be mssing – some of the most amazing people ho are now very close friends – I didnt care much for them at the begining – it was only when if ound myself in situations that I had to interact with them – that i realized what I ve been missing -

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Lola Pisan November 24, 2009 at 8:22 pm

r blockages,even the small ones that people not notice about.I ve found in these days how much the language is being distortioned…people forget daily the simply things,actions,emotions,thoughts that take them to abundance,joy,happiness… It s really a slow process to touch their hearts for them to remember we r just Humans having a life experience, Souls full of magical powers that we don t discover cause we daily choose to live with prejudices..Most times they r a projections of ourselves to others.& i believe a FOCUS point should b in language,how we express,how we construct our expressions, we r sending thoughts energy when we do that,and we r mostly,never COUNSCIUOS about it,we just open our mouth and speak…
People read daily nice phrases that make them think about sth,as u share here..but in an instant they forget,they don t learn or have a reflection,counsciously,they r always “in a rush time”….How the world can become better if we don t act like Humans Beings, instead of humans doing???…..

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Marlen November 24, 2009 at 8:20 pm

I change my mind all of the time. Sometimes it is out of fear and I think that well meaning people want you to be cautious but sometimes they instill fear and I don’t do well with fear. I want to travel to teach children English in latin countries and I don’t ever go because I am afraid I will sick or I will get hurt or a million other things. My family says things that generalize the culture especiallly if it is a third world country. There are just too many things to think about all of the time. I use to celebrate Thanksgiving and now I don’t. There is a documentary on PBS “We Shall Remain” and it talks about what really happened to the Native American Indians. I am Navajo on my mother’s side of the family and even though I just feel like I cannot want to celebrate the killing of so many innocent people. I am thankful that I have the ability to change my mind. If I didn’t I would still be celebrating thanksgiving and hopefully someday I will be teaching english in another country to the children and maybe the people who are doing bad things can change their minds to do better…. paz y amor

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Thomas November 24, 2009 at 11:07 pm

I taught English in Peru and I don’t regret the experience. There’s tons of schools and NGO’s around that offer vacancies. I’ve been over there about a year and a half and there’s nothing to worry about if you just listen to the people’s advice and get a good travel guide. The best would be if you would be able to travel around once first to get a taste and afterwards see if you want to go and build a career there. The sights I saw and the experiences I had there greatly outdo the suffered inconveniences.
abrazzo

keith November 24, 2009 at 8:15 pm

I question and challenge all the time. The problem is people accept what they are told without question.

It was Paul when warning of False Prophets said to not believe what was said, even what he said, but to go back to first principles, primary sources.

Look how people are mislead by the mainstream media, which simply regurgitates the political agenda. Look at how people are manipulated into following the latest fashions, buying unwanted consumer crap, hanging on the every word of so-called celebrities who have nothing worthwhile to say, so ably illustrated in Paulo’s latest novel The Winner Stands Alone.

I decide what I will read. I certainly am not influenced by the view of reviewers who generally talk a load of clap-trap. I listen to what Paulo says, I listen to what my lovely friend Alissa says as it was she who recommended I read works by Orhan Pamuk. People follow my suggestions on reading.

I have not read The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran I have though dabbled in Jesus. Only the day before I was reading this week’s thought I was reading selected passages from Jesus to my friend Sian.

Often the image I have been given of people is not that what I form when I meet them. Too often what is happening is the projection of an agenda, not the telling of the truth.

Too many people allow themselves to be directed by others, even directed in the way they feel, rather than thinking for themselves, taking the path less trod.

http://www.heureka.clara.net/art/the-road-not-taken.htm

We no longer have mass produced goods, we have mass produced thoughts, picked up and plugged into our brains.

The opportunities are there, but how many follow the path of Santiago, learn to read the signs, grasp the opportunities that life presents. One such person who did was Tererai Trent, who from humble origins in Zimbabwe managed to obtain a PhD.

http://keithpp.wordpress.com/2009/11/18/a-story-to-inspire-all-of-us/

Few people strive for the Truth, they take the easy way out with their mass produced thoughts.

If people did start to think for themselves, we would see variety, we would see colour, not the monochrome monoculture of corporate diktats, that tell us how to think, what to eat, what to wear, even the music we should listen to.

Looking at it from a somewhat different perspective, my thoughts on twitter are occasionally re-tweeted, so I must occasionally have something worthwhile to say!

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Alex Sandra UK November 25, 2009 at 12:56 am

Keith,

I once did a project on the effect of the media with regards to the war in Iraq. The conclusion was generally that people would have the same opinions as the newspaper they read. If they read a certain newspaper, they were more likely to agree with the war and if they read another they would disagree, depending on the newspapers viewpoints (and of course political stance.) Of course, the argument could be that people chose the newspapers because they agreed with the headlines, but either way, they were more likely to have the same opinions as the newspaper on other issues also.

It is also the same in many cases within families. The influences are also there with religion, football teams, music, books, education etc. It gets passed on from generation to generation.

‘Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.’ Albert Einstein

Alex

p.s. I have read many of your reviews and I think your work is very interesting.

Melle Johnson November 24, 2009 at 8:13 pm

The Beach Boys! My father hated the Beach Boys. He thought they were square. That became my opinion also.

Recently I started listening to “Pet Sounds” which is now critically accepted thus “okay” to like. That album led me to their earlier songs, which in the past I had dismissed as naive and superficial.

Now I hear clear beauty and harmonic angels converging! People in my circle are very pro-intellectual and hate anything that is simple and direct. That is a barrier to happiness and wonder, IMO.

Melle

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