by Paulo Coelho
A very wealthy man asked a Zen master for a text which would always remind him how happy he was with his family.
The Zen master took some parchment and, in beautiful calligraphy, wrote:
– The father dies. The son dies. The grandson dies.
– What? – said the furious rich man. – I asked you for something to inspire me, some teaching which might be respectfully contemplated by future generations, and you give me something as depressing and gloomy as these words?
– You asked me for something which would remind you of the happiness of living together with your family. If your son dies first, everyone will be devastated by the pain. If your grandson dies, it would be an unbearable experience.
“However, if your family disappears in the order which I placed on the paper, this is the natural course of life. Thus, although we all endure moments of pain, the generations will continue, and your legacy will be long-lasting.”
.
{ 54 comments… read them below or add one }
Nice…
but sometimes its good for us what God choses for us and we may never know His wisdom . .
very true .. I saw great pain when a father lost all his four sons in a recent blast in lahore
This is a simply wonderful text ! Thank you.
True
we all should live with inspirating words, that kind of life leads to a fullfilled life.
Querido Paulo,
Excelente texto. Pena que existam pessoas que vivem como se não fossem morrer.
Até mais.
The death is in the natural order of the life. I think that there’s no ” good death “. The dialogue is interrupted when the persons who surround us died. It’s thus important to say what we have on the heart and not to forget to say I love you to the persons who are dear to us because the dialogue is interrupted when the persons died. Later…it’s too late!
Light & Love,
Interesting point of view, the master was so right. The ideal order was written by him, still how many times things goes differently. God forbidd us from tragedies.
The truth is always simple and pure
Wonderful Paulo,
I imagine, after this lesson with the Zen master, the father taking his son and grandson fishing.
Lainee
you write well paulo…
you inspire lots of persons…
im one of them…
thank you so much….
i’ll keep on reading your books…
goodluck!!!
This is what makes me happy in my situation.
Please read my mails.
I’m not seeing even under your feets. Maybe I don’t desreve it, but what makes me move is something more than my whole life.
For god’s sake, answer me.
one single FACT: everyone’s life has its end. its not how long you live but how you live.
for mr. paulo coelho;
when i read your books, it always makes my heart smile.
To see fully, without being paralysed or blinded…
If we only would see the situations/teachings in multiple ways, away from the overtaking emotions, things, as they are, as they could be. Multiplural ways, instead of the one that we’ve been used to…
Thank You for the dream.
Recieved it yesterday.
Love,
L.
The Zen master wrote the preferred order of events for a family man.
As I cruise beyond middle age I have had the misfortune and privilege of witnessing many friends and relatives deaths. The Zen Master wrote about as much as should be hoped for.A person could hope to pass away in their sleep after another perfect day knowing that their life is complete in every way. You can hope and if you want pray for this end but it seems laughably greedy to ask for when so many people only want another day anyway they can get it.
It is why I end letters to friends with this simple but important wish.
Be well.
My Father in law is dying of Cancer it is only a matter of time.
He does not deserve the painful death he is receiving he has done nothing all the time I have known him other than help his neighbours and friends often to his own detriment.
It tests my beleaguered faith to see this happening and try to comfort my Wife. It’s a cruel disease as you greave before the patient dies.
The natural order it may be but one cannot choose the manner of ones departure from this mortal plane I can only hope to sleep and not to wake when my turn arrives for the last great adventure.
Inner time flows backwards.
I read somewhere, in some books, that God gives us death so that we know what life is; to fully appreciate every day, every minute of our living.
Some of my friends lost whole family during the war in Balkans, some of them lost children, grandchildren, husbands, brothers, fathers, in just couple of days.
I will always remember the pain on their faces, and some sad, distant emptiness in the eyes as if they were with no life in them. But, life was going on… most of my friend found the strength and some hidden force within themselves to carry on with more passion and love for life. I am so proud of them; at the end life prevailed over death.
Thank you, Paulo.
Dear Sabina,
I am very happy that you reminded us of the families of the victims of war. Sometimes we become immune to war after being bombarded with war stories on the Satellite News Channels! We often forget that there are REAL people behind these stories. Also, I am very sad when I watch the reports of the bodies of young members of the Armed Forces being repatriated. I am the mother of two sons and I can sympathise with the mothers waiting at the airports. But as you say, death teaches us many lessons and often these very mothers, when intervieswd on TV later, show a positive attitude and prove your point that life can prevail over death.
Take care, Theresa
A simple story again with a profound meaning – much grief in the world is caused by these natural events happening in an unnatural order – the master’s ‘blessing’ when first heard, sounded bitter like medicine, but of course was a blessing for the family’s future generations.
I needed to hear this today! Not looking forward to leaving my home for a second time in six months due to another’s personality disorder… Life begins again – today I send off my papers for my Advanced Diploma in non medical Hypnosis – Psychotherapy – Psychoanalysis.
A new dawn; It’s a new day; It’s a new life; For You…
Woww I think that’s no true but but it makes me think that the family is a real treasure and we must take advantage .. I really love all your books .. love you; thanks for a lot ! bye
Agus from Argentina
Yes this is the natural order, but in my case my grandfather outlived his son, and we were bereft of a father, but I am pleased to say the generation is continuing and she has his bright blue eyes… (despite both his father and msyelf having dark)….
Thank you.
sorry meant to say her father… must still be upset!
fancy meeting you here, lovely Pandora!!! this is way off topic but wanted to say…my SON has the blue eyes despite his parents(and grandparents) dark eyes. a genetic gift from his GREAT grandparents. NEATO!!! Sorry to hear natural order skipped your house, but i bet that is what makes you SO strong!
I agree with Kathleen.
Order is a man-made concept. Life not a right; you are not given the promise of old age, and neither such an orderly way of death.
I totally agree with this order of things. Life is unbearable for a parent once a child has gone. It almost makes the parent lose the will for their life. I have seen this happen and it is the most terrible thing.
Sometimes in life we wish for unnecessary materialist items, however, life would be far more valuable appreciating how lucky we are to have the most basic things.
Love
xxxx
nice… and very true..
THIS WAS INDEED ENLIGHTENING AND PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND IT. WHAT HAS TO HAPPEN WILL HAPPEN. HAPPINESS CAN NOT BE ATTAINED OUT OF THE WAY FROM NATURE. NATURAL ORDER IS THE ONLY WAY AND HAPPINESS HAS TO BE SOUGHT FROM IT.
Ah ah I like what you say about the “growing pills” Darshan Chande. Thanks!
Being a mother, the greatest possible blessing I can imagine in this life is simply to live until my daughter reaches adulthood, and never to have to witness her death. All other concerns in life, by comparison, seem small and relatively insignificant.
Thinking of life in this way, there is much reason to be happy each and every day, even when other things in life may not be going so well. As long as we are both still here, and healthy, life is good.
Is true. Is the natural order of living but is really painful when you experience it before all the people you know and eventually you feel like you are in a race to death.
If things were like that, then we would not suffer so much when someone young dies.
Great words, as always, thank you, Paulo!
The Zen master is teaching us a great lesson. Only one exception from the rule; in the WOL family, we need Paulo to live forever.
Paulo will live forever!
This is very beautiful…it shows the natural order of things and the joy there is alongside the pain….thank you for sharing this….with love to you Paulo xx
great!=D
Paulo indeed has grasped my psyche… He rocks!!! \m/
XD
Once we are incarnated and born in the material world the only certain event, our inevitable fate, is DEATH.
The Zen master said a big truth: the natural course of things are the older to die first and then the others to follow..
In older days in Cypriot news-papers there were announcements for people who have died:’ Mr. or Mrs. so and so has yesterday died in full age[meaning very old] and he/she had the happiness of seeing his children and grand-children useful members of the society’.
So the people of my country knew the Zen’s master’s Wisdom.
LOVE,
Thelma xxx
We still have that in our newspapers here. It always says how old the person was, who preceded them in death (family members who died before them), and who they were survived by (family members who outlived them). I never thought about why obituaries are printed in this format, but I suppose it does serve to place a person’s death in the order of life. It is very sad to see an obituary with the parents’ names listed among the survivors. It is also very sad when there is no list of survivors – when you realize that the person died, having no family members to mourn their passing.
Dear Thelma,
Your comment reminds me of an Irish joke – every morning John reads the newspaper; if his name is not in the deaths notices he gets up out of bed!
People are demanding. – They don’t want to accept the absence of tragedies and a life in natural order is happiness –
…until the day they stand in front of a tragedy.
Very wise… the rich mane jumped into conclusion without waiting to hear how those gloomy words make sense.
And this text will always remind us how the natural order can inspire peace and courage.
Memento mori
anyways its so simple that is a point in favour of it
This is a beautiful metaphor, Paulo. It reminds me of hexagram 37 “The Family” (I Ching): “THE FAMILY shows the laws operative within the household that, transferred to outside life, keep the state and the world in order. The influences that goes out from within the family is represented by the symbol of the wind created by fire… The family is society in embryo; it is the native soil on which performance of moral duty is made easy through natural affection, so that within a small circle a basis of moral practice is created, and this is later widened to include human relationships in general. When the family is in order, all social relationships of mankind will be in order.” (Wilhelm/Baynes translation)
Love, Bout
Excellent!
It reminds me of the climate meeting in Copenhagen. Many countries don´t want to hear the truth, they only want money and power…..
Good morning,
Thank you for reminding!
Have a great day everyone,
with Patience & Trust
Life is not always so orderly but that is the way most people wish it.
Hi Jennifer
Wonderful to see you here too…..!!!
There is truth in the saying that “all that is hidden will be revealed”… especially with genes, it seems, and friends on Facebook :D
♥ ♥ ♥
… and I’m feeling good!
Yes. Hypnotize him to say; ‘I’m alive’ ‘I’m alive’ always! And GOOD LUCK to YOU with your paper dude! :)
…and then goes to the pub to complain to his buddies about the government!