etching by Rembrandt
I’m going in search of the adventure of being alive.
And it’s complicated: why am I not looking for happiness when everyone has taught me that happiness is the only goal worth pursuing?
Why am i going to risk taking a path that no one else is taking?After all, what is happiness?
Love, they tell me. But love doesn’t bring and never has brought happiness.
On the contrary, its a constant state of anxiety, a battlefield; its sleepless nights, asking ourselves all the time if we’re doing the right thing. Real love is composed of ecstacy and agony.All right then, peace.
Peace? If we look at the Mother, she’s never at peace. The winter does battle with the summer, the sun and d moon never meet, the tiger chases the man, who’s afraid of the dog, who chases the cat, who chases the mouse, who frightens the man.
Money brings happiness. Fine. In that case, everyone who earns enough to have a high standard of living would be able to stop work. But then they’re more troubled than ever, as if they were afraid of losing everything. Money attracts money, that’s true. Poverty might bring unhappiness, but money wont necessarily bring happiness.I spent a lot of my life looking for happiness, now what i want is joy.
Joy is like sex – it begins and ends. I want pleasure. I want to be contended, but happiness? I no longer fall into that trap.
by Paulo Coelho ( “The Witch of Portobello” )
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I’m in complete communion with that etching from Rembrandt.
Feeling all it chy nee already . A true JOY of a model modelling.Hoy ,I feel yo and me. Si.
Without the aches and the X. ;)
Happiness is satisfaction with what I’m doing and getting.
However, I have my dreams also and acting on them but with no exaggeration!
Happiness is contentment… that is all!!! it does not matter if you are rich or poor. Poor people can be content too and happy. Material things blinds you… once you have it, you do not what to loose it, and that is your trap. Think about the natives from the Amazon, as an example, what material things they have? do you think they are unhappy? They seem content and happy to me. We humans tend to think the way we live is always better than any other cultures. Soon we want to fix the way they live… they can not be happy living like that! and the game you know how it is…
maybe these people have the key to happiness.
Be content on your own shoes.
make the best out of any situations
stop the want, want and want.
stop to smell the flowers
watch a sunset
stop and listen to a stranger… listen!
be kind
Help a stranger, and save it to yourself.
count how many tones of greens you can see on a tree.
feel the warmth of the sun on your face.
these simple things brings you more happiness than MONEY!
i agree!
(these simple things brings you more happiness)
I couldn’t careless if happiness is somehow misleading us into something that then will make us unhappy again. But yes, I agree, I want joy, I want contentment of life. What a luxury feeling being pampered by life.
Aaah, yes, again I’m thinking, Happiness is bit overrated word. What is Happiness anyway. I want to feel Alive and that’s why I take whatever life’s offering me, challenge me even though it’s against the whole world, I dont care anymore. Its celebration of Life!
Joy is like a vibration that would truely just comes and goes, you can’t say no neither when it comes nor when it goes. Who doesn’t want Joy that lasts, even in the matter of sex. But it never stays, so we turn to happiness, which seems more reachable as it can happen when our hearts open the door. And love contains a lot like strings of our heart, one of them is joy, another one of them is sadness.(That’s why we honor the sad moment as it reminds us how deep we loved.)Hope we all live out ourselves, don’t miss out any chance to follow our hearts no matter what comes next and compose a beautiful piece of music.
Happiness is a place in your mind, that you create and is up to you to live there.
The problem is when we tend to associate happiness with something (happiness is when one have…) or disassociate it from something ( (happiness is when one doesn’t have…)! With “something” I don’t necessarily mean material things.
Happiness, I believe, is not the opposite of anything nor the conclusion of anything! Happiness is not about perfection but about wholeness, and wholeness means day and night, dark and light sadness and joy..
Tarek
:-)
yes it is a combination of all these things that puts “pepper” into your life.We cannot “escape” from it like -the weather -
The problem is that we try to “define” all the time, and those definitions come from a representation of the world as our mind thinks of it, which takes its source at entries put there by others. “Happiness” is something that needs to be found in action and not with words. “Happiness” is something that is not attached to nothing, because if we loose that something then happiness will then be no longer present. Happiness is a treasure to be found by one, which becomes its treasure and which he can choose to keep hidden or share. Happiness you can find in this world but does not relate to this world. It relates to the inner being, to the Being in itself. For me, happiness is to find who I truly am and live who I truly am. For me, I can’t believe I am there, “happiness” is walking in the dark to find the light and being in the light knowing that I have to continue because more light is to come. For me “happiness” is discovering, experimenting. I can’t believe I am here saying those words. I try to find what suits me, ready to go against all definitions to find my definition and again knowing that that definition may move again … That is the beauty of life for me!
Love, Jojo.
I agree so much with these thoughts! Why should anybody search only for happiness? Why should melancholy be considered as a negative sentiment since it feels so smooth? I think that one should try and enjoy all the possible feelings of the human nature. Maybe this is hapiness in the end.
A few random thoughts-questions that came up while reading your note:
a)How do we define Happiness?
b)Is Loving the same as being In love?
c)What happens when one experiences TRUE Love?
d)Do we look for happiness in stability and why…?
e)Is the state of Love different from Being Present at the moment?…
I’m still looking to find the answers…
Thank you for all the inspiration you’ve been giving me, all these years…You helped me change my life…
i’m glad to find someone that have same quetions like mine (number 1-3)
Joy is the is the only way to find happiness within your self.
Remember this: Today is tomorrows old news.
When I read that “Today is tomorrows old news”, an alarm sign !!! I think it was Paolo who said that if today is like tomorrow, something is wrong!
:-)
Love, Jojo.
i also read the book and i found it fascinating in every aspect… made me evaluate what i want in life all over again to c if i’m on the right track and i decided to be a compass
I came to this realization lately, i need joy , and the joy i’m looking up too and couldn’t find yet is love , and a love free of agony ( yes it should be there) , but i can still tolrate this infront of the moments of happnies that it beings , i said moments, or may be minties , hours , years , who cares if it lasts or not?? , and who said that we last?? ..
“Joy isn’t a result of what goes on in the mind alone; joy is an ecomental interaction, a constant dialogue between the brain, the senses, and the things we encounter in the world. It’s often said that happiness comes from within, but joy comes from without — from the impressions made by pleasurable things on our retinas, our fingertips, and our tongues, the way they disrupt the flow our thoughts and focus them on beauty and wonder.”
aesthetics of joy – Solastalgia
http://aestheticsofjoy.com/2010/02/solastalgia/
Abraços Paulo!
P.S.: sex! AAAAND chocolate… pleasurable thing that makes a very goooood impression on my tongue, sometimes on my fingertips too *I like when it melts* #disgusting heheh
P.S.2: “Eat chocolates! Know there are no metaphysics in the world but chocolates.” Fernando Pessoa
P.S.3: *choycolate*
I am speechless!!!!!!! This is my idea of living! All I can say is: THE MOST BEUTIFULL FEELING IN LIFE IS TO KNOW A PERSON WHO THINKS LIKE YOU!! I LOVE YOU, PAULO!!
So true, I absolutely agree with you,it’s relieving and a wonderful feeling to experience.
Joy is for those who make the chocolate; pleasure is for those who eat it.
Hello, I think joy can be found anywhere, especially when you are not looking. Sometimes it comes to you thru a thought or a look or a feeling. We can choose to accept joy or pretend not to see it, and that is the question, do we feel we deserve this joy? I find joy in my helping someone, or being proud of myself, I find joy in the soft caress of the warmth of the sun and in the coolness of the wind. I find joy in the dreams for the future and in the softness of my bed. I find it in the smallest things, but only when I am not distracted and give my mind peace to feel this joy. Thank you Paulo!!!! You always find something new to make me see life in different lights.
Let me live in Rembrandt’s times! I would have been a top model. ;-)
If you knew yourself for even one moment,
if you could just glimpse
your most beautiful face,
maybe you wouldn’t slumber so deeply
in that house of clay.
Why not move into your house of joy
and shine into every crevice!
For you are the secret
Treasure-bearer,
and always have been.
Didn’t you know?
– Rumi
Has is only been a year? Not even that long. On 23 april my lover gave me the Witch of Portobello for my birthday. i so needed to feel more connected to him, to become much closer to him, that i not only read the book but also found this blog.
Last year april has become bleak in the turmoil of times, it has faded away. Some of the people that slide into my life become so meaningful, givers of joy and pleasure they mean to be, right here, right now. But i, i struggle with the forces of love and eros, i focus on the flaws and want to hold on to the intensity of the moment, looking for sustainability, for permanence, for ever lasting connections, not a paper ring. Now my lover has long gone, and i am not the same woman i was last year. Not at peace, not financially safe, not happy, but still my heart is light and i am unafraid of the stream that takes me to an unknown future. It is spring again and my eyes look into the world less strained than ever.
Money attracts money but it also seems to attract a kind of nothingy ‘now what-ness’ about life, an emptiness….
One of the most interesting concepts Paulo talks about… Peace: what is it? Is it also a nothingly ‘now what-ness’, another kind of emptiness?
The world is full of dualism, conflict, a balancing act. Is this a good thing? Maybe the word ‘good’ is another nothing word… it doesn’t really cover it.
It is difficult though, from an ordinary standpoint,to get up above the nitty gritty of life and understand the bigger picture in the way that Paulo seems able to do. What do you do if everyday life is drowning you and just keeping your head above water is a struggle? How does Paulo maintain this overview? I don’t think it is easy to do. Just as well though, that he does – I certainly would find it difficult to keep popping my head up above water without Paulo’s daily comments and thought provoking questions. Or without the thought provoking questions of a host of others.
If you can swim then, do you have a responsibility to the others who cannot? Do we all have levels of responsibility. Something to give back, a way of thinking to share with others?
Only in theory joy does not end!
joy.. we can find it in every moment, every while.. it is like miracle, not only like a sex :) .. and miracle we can see always when we allow yourself to see it to feel inner peace..
I love your books Paulo, you are inspiration for everyone who start to search own way in life.. my way is love..
At all times, the concept of happiness for each will mean something. The poor will see happiness in bogadstve,
lone-to find their soulmate and so on.
Love is a battlefield.
I am a passionate fighter.
We think that we love, but this so beautiful feeling is mixed with so many others emotions, the big work is to dig out this first pure sparkle of love which was the one that made us come to life. It is a long way to recover from false ideas induced by education, religion, society, morale, etc… And for that, we need to be in peace with ourselves, to be able to listen to what is in the bottom of our soul. And then we discover that we are not loving, but that something in us is love, something that is everywhere : we just don’t see it.
Money is nothing, money is just a mean to get material things. We need it because we are afraid. This shoul be the freedom to be looked after.
Sex can be so many things too. The Greeks named differently love : eros, agape, philia…Sex can be boring, as well as a very high experience.
Let’s begin to do every day something very well, with true good will, and true love. It does good to us, and to others.
All we want is happiness… All our lives, we search for it but sometimesit can only be found in the simple things in which we sometimes overlook. Like they say, somethings that we sreach for the most are the ones that are hidden in plain sight.
Happiness is a state of mind a state where we feel that we are contented we have achieved what we need …For a scientist it would be a new invention , for a Worker it would be the hike in his salary , for a person in love would be being along with his/her love.. it is all just momentary and not constant.. it is just because of the fear of loosing that what we have brings us out of that state.. For a person who has been out of this worldly feelings of being attached to some thing or expecting something the state will be lasting …. just take an example of a new born chid he is always happy until the small being is hungry or is being troubled … So happiness would be just momentary till you have the crave for more ….
Creame de la Creame.Love is the way from agony to ecstacy with joyful stops on the way.The way round turns Love in something different,where pauses are neglected.Both ways can make HAPPY-tastes differ.Up to the hill or Down? “Sexstops”,as essentional part of the journey,can be very helpful in the Lovenavigation.
Love is not a magic pill, and it is not seizable either: instead of trying aimlessly to define it, I’d rather try and try to live it and enjoy every single moment…
When you search something, this is because it’s hard to get it. You fight for, and take time. According to importance you give to it’s occurence you allocate a level of strenght and some time to succeed. But the harder you can get it, the more you spend time, the more it’s intriguing, and the more you’re nervous until you get it. Love is a concept, everyone has is own definition. Like money, to live you need it , but not only that. You also need a family, friends, health, money,… and a goal to live. An athlete want a medal, a prayer want to see respect all over the world, a mother want to see the children have a happy life, scientists search “The” formula… And for some people love is the goal… because they have all the rest they wanted… Love is easier to appreciate than what we frequently think. But like money, we always want more and more, and always look at the neighbour. Every story is personal. Like a trader is attracted by making some cash in order to be happy, some people multiply sex to get love. But in both cases, is that the good way… to be satisfied ?…
Patience is the award in itself – brings joy of today :)
Write and live long Paulo.
grattitude and simplicity are happiness to me
I wrote few lines on that idea, hope you wont laugh, is an exercise…Thank you,
To run away or…
The feeling is strong
I wanted to run from
It overwhelmed me
Made me addicted
So for a while
I looked for just cheap things
Thinking I was safe
From lost or sufferings.
But why a day
I saw the glimpse of paradise
In that man eyes?
I knew was the strongest thing
It was a moment
That worth more than everything
That closed out the world
That made shine everything
That cut off distance
And made me shiver
So today
I Wont run anymore
Love is the utmost power
And the greatest treasure
Forget other handy things
And praise the gate to heaven
Love
The greatest mystery!
Almost true…but why we are searching love than? Because with the strong sensations has a power on us like some powerful drug, and we feel alive!Even if we suffered in past, we still look for the thrill, for the thing that move us, and if we are lucky, we find a treasure, we find our soul mate, and than we have a glimpse of paradise. It may last a moment, but is so special that moment, that worths more than everything else we experienced.
Joy is everyday sensation, or, not so rare as the moment I described above. Of course sometimes we are tired, and decide to look near us, to take something at hand…
But love in its complexity, with its huge potential, has no competitors.
If you are searching for the path that leads to happines then you must accept sadness to accompany you on your journey. You cannot be in a constant state of being happy. The word happy would not have any meaning. Would we value life if there was no death. I concede love does bring pain and suffering but i would not have it any other way. It’s the adventure of being alive…it’s your fate.
Beautifully said.
I’m on that path too.
Not easy at times, but the consciousness is there.
I can feel happiness when I choose to. It’s the way I look at things that give me that choice.
Happiness is linked to so many things that needs to be defind too.. it starts and end as u mentioned but what we try to do is make it stay longer :)
I totally agree with you.. I always ask my self for the definition of alot of things which leads me to ask for the definition of other things..loved what you wrote
Thank you so much
A harmonious balance between love, money , joy and sex can bring Happiness..which actually is not a state it is dynamic.process…
Paulo! I often read your blog and cheerfully click the ‘like’ button. I often don’t feel the need to comment. Who needs to hear additional words? I was honestly surprised to read this…truly deeply…as if I read the words of a man who lost his faith and I am not speaking of any religious thought.
We don’t chase these things…or even need to. They come to us when we allow ourselves to receive them. Over the past year or so of discovering your works, I have been inspired by them. Freedom of the body, mind, and spirit to simply touch others with love to give and receive love in an unconditional way without expecting anything in return. GIVING whatever you can to others. Time, money, or talent. I am FAR from ever being into religion. Far from ever even labeling an entity a single name. AND FAR from ever being afraid of this force that humans try to define and give rules for. We created the rules along the way to try to understand that which cannot be understood in our present condition of having to care for and feed our bodies to sustain the life force that is in it so we remain alive.
Dear Paulo…we grow and learn from each other because we need each other because we can only view so much. As a friend of mine recently wrote to me…we are all like a people that surrounds an elephant…one viewing an eye, a tail, a limb, or an ear…all of the views are different, but we are all correct.
However the foundation is the elephant. The foundation to life is love, but love and fear cannot coexist. Fear stunts growth and doesn’t cause sleepless nights. Open palms with each other to allow the people in our lives to grow and flourish and just be whomever they desire to be.
JOY…pure joy comes from simply allowing that flow to happen. I tried an experiment yesterday, here in China. I decided and intended on looking at how many people I could touch along the way. How many would allow them to be photographed….and finally how many would approach me. My invitation, a smile…without a word of Chinese…and just thought of one word. LOVE.
The journey was a four hour walk in the streets of Nanjing. The settings, a park, an alley market, the simple streets of Nanjing. I was able to have one of the best days here just because of a smile. I went up and helped people with their burdens, I reached out to a homeless couple on the street, I was even approached by a Chinese man that simply gestured that he wanted to take me out for dinner just because I smiled. I photographed a private music lesson just because I appreciated their music…and helped an elderly woman with her bike. LOVE, Joy and peace just from a four hour walk…a giving and exchanging for one person to another…from a stranger with blue eyes, fair skin and graying temples.
I only expected to give. I expected to turn stone faces into joyous ones. To touch with a genuine hand without a word. Our actions reveal the truth of our hearts. Without fear, a fear can be hard to beat when you are the stranger in a strange land, but the fear vanishes when you touch with love.
Then you get that joy…that can surpass the ecstasy of sex.
This is just my view of the ‘elephant’. We choose our own views and no one is more right than another.
Maarilyn Campiz
I would have to say that… one should just be…the only thing is that nothing is anything you which for in live, if you learn to accept everything that happen’s in your path you may find happiness…I do not think everyone will agree but that is how I personally find my happiness…because once in awhile something is missing, but nothing is perfect after all…good luck everyone.
Yes.
I want joy and I want sex because they begin and they end.
Happiness ,the way most people understand it, is not for me. I used to be happy , but I gave up because it was too boring.
Now I know that I want joy and enthusiam in my life and that my path will never be done, not even the day that I die.
Joy is when you strip everything away, lose it all, and are completely still and you can say, “hey…I’m ok with nothing because in nothing I have everything.” Our hearts hold the true treasures in life.
P.S. Love the title by the way…got my attention. :)
indeed. i truly agree with you. the true way of being happy is from deepen heart, from our way of thinking and our way of feeling grateful of being the way we are >> this is so theory, but worth to do.
thanks for sharing, Mr. Coelho.
Beloved Paulo,
forgive me if this passage seems jaded to my ears. We all have our reasons why we choose to see life the way we want to see it.
What I find intriguing is that we spend our lives following sayings that maybe are obsolete, and when we see them as obsolete, we give up on them, instead of polishing our collective mentality. So for the last 50 years or so the ‘pursuing happiness’ became fashionable. so a lot of people started chasing things, positions, people, while placing the source of happiness in anything else but them. Just because they gave away the source of happiness to a car, a job, an unfaithful or a boring faithful partner, does not mean happiness doesn’t exist. Maybe we need to add a third dimension to our lives, ourselves.
I spend some time in my life pursuing happiness, love, feeling unhappy when I had the job i wanted, because it wasn’t how i pictured it in my mind. feeling unhappy when I touched love, because the asshole of my affection did not respond how i dreamed ‘the one’ would in my mind. same with friends, cars, clothes, even sex… not realizing i accomplish only two things with that mentality, and none of those two would be happiness;
1. I allow others and other things to have control over my own well-being.
2. by doing it again and again, i create enough references in my life and reinforce the mentality that what I’m searching for does not exist, weakening myself more and more.
what if instead of searching you would create your own happiness? The joy of loving somebody still exists, even during disappointment or unrequited love, because i choose to believe love is greater than demanding someone to behave how i wish them to, because i believe love is greater than need. it is not complete happiness, because of course i am pining for someone that can trigger the same or greater love in me AND be capable to respond as I want and need to be responded to, but how can I link the love and respect for someone’s free will with my unhappiness?
the moment I understood happiness is not something i chase, but something i choose to create, i can access it anytime i wish so. Joy may entertain me, but unless I decide to allow it to, joy can never fulfill me. Happiness does.
(whether i am wrong or right, Sensei, who knows? )
The next mystery i have though, how to bring happiness to the ones i love. I can bring them joy, but it’s hard to see that people are not willing to accept happiness can be so simple. So I watch them accepting the joy I bring, but in sigh, half-hearted, wishing it would be some fairytale happiness.
much love,
Anca
Felicidade, alegria..
o importante é encontrar algo que faça sentido, até no trabalho árduo; se é aquilo que te traz alegria é prazeroso.
sexo não é escolha é necessidade, como viver intensamente tbm.
boa noite Paulo Coelho que Deus o ilumine e te traga boas novas e expiração para nos fazer pensar.
ABENÇOADO E PROLONGADO SEJA SEUS DIAS SOBRE A TERRA.
Sweet Paulo,
Thanks once again for making me pull from my insides to comment here.
God/Goddess loves us so deeply and wants us to grow here while on this world. There is plenty of love here if we will just open ourselves to it by deeply living in each moment and recognizing the signs. When we are in communication with God/Goddess, joy radiates from us and our eyes are opened to those in need. Fear disappears as we live within God’s/Goddesses’ love. It’s as simple as this. Life flows for us.. joy radiates from us, and baby, sex is wonderful!!! :-)
Love and radiating joy/sex to you,
Lainee
I feel happy when I have a healthy body and an alive soul! Love, joy, agony, pain..; work, travel..; family, friends, strangers..; money…- I need everything to keep my soul alive.
When the soul is alive and the body is not starving, one is able to make little miracles on this Earth! Enjoy your life!
Joy and sex and everything else do not end. They change into other things.
Sex becomes satiation. Joy becomes ennui. That new-car smell becomes the stink of burning oil and moldy fast-food wrappers under the seats. The might pride of Detroit becomes its new mayor’s first official promise: to bulldoze 3,000 derelict houses.
Yin and Yang. Light and shadow play across the mountain all day as the Sun moves. What is hidden in darkness is revealed, and what was clearly lit is concealed. Even eternal mountains change constantly.
“Everything always changes so nothing can be yours,” wrote Shunryu Suzuki. You perceive a thing; then you want it; by the time you form the intent to get it, it has changed into something else and what you get is not what you wanted. Nothing can ever be yours.
But just as women (and some men) can have multiple orgasms that go on and on, so can everyone have moments of Joy that flow together into constant ecstasy; like the stream of soap bubbles from a machine, each bubble popping after only seconds but the stream of them never ending. To live in a stream of Joy bubbles is easy and simple.
“Always, if you have a choice, be kind. Remember the poor, the hungry, and the miserable. Always remember the suffering, and those who need. The greatest creative power you have on Earth, whether you are an angel, a spirit, or a man or a woman or a child is to help others… the poor, the hungry, the oppressed. To ease pain and give joy are your finest powers. Kindness is a human miracle, so to speak. It’s unique to us humans, and our more developed angels or spirits, to be kind.”
– Ann Rice, in “Servant of the Bones”
Every act of Kindness, no matter how small, is rewarded by the release of neurochemicals whose effects the mind interprets as “feels good.” Be Kind at every opportunity, and you will live in an endless stream of Joy bubbles.
Smile at a passing stranger. Let your eyes say to him or her, “I deem your existence pleasing.”
Let another pass before you, honoring him or her above yourself.
Call, “Thank you!” to the bus driver as you disembark.
When someone mutters, because the boss told them to, “Hihowareya?” beam at him or her and sing,
“I’m just VIBRATING with Joy! And you?”
He or she will smile, even laugh. Pain will be eased; Joy will be given. Kindness will be done. You will get your neurochemicals.
Not an instant passes without an opportunity to be Kind and blow another bubble of Joy into the world.
La felicidad es como una utopía dificil de alcazar y se piensa que al alcanzarla debe durar toda la vida, se la sitúa en el futuro y esperar algo que no llega no hace feliz.
La alegría es algo que estás viviendo aquí y ahora y es eso lo que te hace feliz.
Me apunto a la alegría de vivir de estar con los amigos y echarse unas risas, bailar, cantar reirse de uno mismo. Compartir y optar por crear espacios divertidos eso da la felicidad siempre sabiendo que la vida tiene dos fases y eso es lo que nos hace disfrutar mas intensamente de los momentos de gloria.
Un beso Paulo
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