EM ESPANOL AQUI: El tédio
_____________________
(these notes were written in August 1986)
We are sitting in a garden in a French town.
– Deep down, people complain, but they love routines – I said.
– Of course, and the reason is very simple: routines give them the false sensation of being safe. Thus, today will be exactly like yesterday, and tomorrow will bring no surprises. When night falls, part of the soul complains that nothing different was experienced, but another part is content – paradoxically, it is for the same reason.
“Evidently this safety is completely false; no one can control anything, and a change always appears at the moment one least expects it, taking us by surprise and with no chance to react or fight.
– If we are free to decide that we want a uniform life, why does God force us to change it?
– What is reality? It is that which we imagine it to be. If many people “think” that the world is like this or like that, everything around us crystallizes, and nothing changes for some time. However, life is a constant evolution – social, political, spiritual, on whatever level it may be. In order for things to evolve, it is necessary for people to change. As we are all interlinked, sometimes destiny gives those hindering evolution a push.
– Generally in a tragic way…
– Tragedy depends on the way you see it. If you chose to be a victim of the world, anything which happens to you will feed that dark side of your soul, where you consider yourself wronged, suffering, guilty and deserving punishment. If you choose to be an adventurer, the changes – even the inevitable losses, since everything in this world changes – can cause some pain, but will soon thrust you forward, forcing you to react.
“In many oral traditions, wisdom is represented by a temple, with two columns at its entrance: these two columns always have names of opposite things, but in order to illustrate what I mean, we will call one Fear and the other Desire. When a man stands at this entrance, he looks at the column of Fear and thinks: “my God, what will I find further ahead?” Then he looks at the column of Desire and thinks: “my God, I’m so accustomed to that which I have, I wish to continue living as I have always lived.” And he remains still; this is what we call tedium.
– Tedium is…
– Movement which ceases. Instinctively, we know we are wrong, and we revolt. We complain to our husbands, wives, children, neighbors. But, on the other hand, we know that tedium and routine are safe havens.
– Can a person remain his whole life in this situation?
– He can be pushed by life, but resist and remain there, always complaining – and his suffering will be useless, will teach him nothing.
“Yes, a person can stand for the rest of his days facing one of the many doors he should go through, but he must understand that he has only truly lived up to that point. He may continue to breathe, walk, sleep and eat – but with less and less pleasure, because he is already spiritually dead and does not know it.
“Until one day when, as well as his spiritual death, physical death appears; at that moment God will ask: “what did you do with your life?” We must all answer this question, and woe betide those who answer: “I remained standing at the door.”
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Good subject! I have at certain junctions in life pushed against the familiarity and made the leap into the unknown and it is always a scary but growing experience. However, I have a young son and have had to learn to be patient with routine as I know children need the security of daily routines at home and school with the occaisional adventure thrown in. Through my chilhood, my mother was restless and we constantly moved. I was moved to different homes, schools and even countries. The carpet was continually being pulled from under me and I became quite insecure and was restless myself as a young adult. There is a certain inner peace that comes from sometimes overriding the constant urge for change and just being content and patient until the right moment to move presents itself. It’s good to strike a balance between doing and being, savouring both the journies and the destinations along the way. Either extreme leads to feeling stuck or never satisfied…
Persian Translation
ملالت الگوست نه حقیقت
.درپارکی,دریکی ازشهرهای فرانسه نشسته ایم
.من گفتم: مردم درحالی که از عمق وجودشان گلایه می کنند بااین همه عاشق زندگی روزمره شان هستند
البته دلیلش بسیار ساده است :کارهای تکراری احساس دروغینی از امنیت به آنها می دهد.بنابراین ,امروز دقیقا مانند دیروزخواهد بود ,وفردا هیچ شگفتی ببارنخواهد آورد.
هنگامی که شب فرامی رسد ,یک یخشی از روح ازاینکه چیز متفاوتی روی نداده گلایه می کند اما بخش دیگری برعکس آن به همان دلیل رضایتمند است.
ابن آرامش آشکارا دروغین می باشد:کسی نمیتواند هیچ چیزی راکنترل کند وتغییر همیشه لحظه ای فرامی رسد که انسان کمترین احتمال را می دهد و به این ترتیب مارا شگفت زده میکند.
. درحالی که شانسی برای واکنش و نبردباقی نمی گذارد
اگر برای تصمیم گیری درباره اینکه زندگی یکنواخت و یک شکلی می خواهیم ,آزاد بودیم ,پس چرا “پروردگار” مجبورمان میکند که آنرا تغییر دهیم.
.حقیقت چیست ؟آن چیزی است که ما تصورمیکنیم باید باشد
اگر تعداد زیادی فکرکنند که دنیا چنین یا چنان است هر آنچه که گرداگردماست منجمد گشته و تا مدتی چیزی تغییری نمی کند.
.بااین همه ,زندگی انقلابی پیوسته است – درهرسطحی که باشد ,اجتماعی,سیاسی,ویا معنوی
برای متحول شدن هرآنچه که هست ,مردم بایستی دگرگون شوند.چون ما همگی درونا به هم پیوسته ایم ,گاهی سرنوشت به آنهایی که مانعی سرراه تحولند تکانی می دهد.
…معمولا این تکان بسیار دردناک است
این تراژدی به این بستگی دارد که چگونه به آن بنگرید.اگر انتخاب کنیدکه قربانی این جهان باشید ,هرآنچه برایتان روی می دهد آن بخش تاریک روحتان را تغذیه خواهد کرد ,همان جایی
.که خودتان را درحال زجرکشیدن ,گناه کار وسزاوار تنبیه تصور می کنید
,واگرانتخاب کنید که یک ماجراجو باشید ,تغییرا ت ,حتی اجتناب ناپذیرترین تلخکامیها
چون هرچیزی دراین دنیا تغییرمی کند-می تواند تا اندازه ای دردآورباشد,ولی بزودی شمارابه پیش خواهد راند ,ومجبورتان خواهد کرد که تا واکنش نشان دهید.
در بسیاری ازسنتهای کلامی ,دانایی وخرد با قلعه ای نشان داده می شود که در ورودی اش دو ستون دارد این دوستون همیشه بنام چیزهای متضادی هستند.
.ولی برای نشان دادن منظورم ,یکی راترس وآن دیگری را آرزو می نامم
هنگامی که شخصی در ورودی این قلعه می ایستد ,به ستون ترس نگریسته و می اندیشد “خدای من ,پیش رو چه خواهم یافت”؟
سپس به ستون آرزو ومیل نگاه کرده و با خود می اندیشد “پروردگارم من به هرآنچه که دارم بسیار عادت کرده ام ,دوست دارم همان گونه که همیشه بوده ام زندگی کنم “و بدین ترتیب دگم و منجمد
.باقی می ماند ,واین چیزی است که ما به آن ملالت میگوییم
ملالت حرکتی است که تسلیم می شود .بطورغریزی ,می دانیم که اشتباه می کنیم وطغیان می کنیم.ما به شوهرمان ,همسرمان ,فرزندان و همسایگانمان شکایت می کنیم.
.ولی ,ازطرف دیگر,می دانیم که یکنواختی وملالت پناهگاه امنی هستند
آیا کسی می تواند تمام زندگی اش را در چنین وضعی ادامه دهد ؟
چنین شخصی توسط زندگی به پیش رانده می شود ,اما مقاومت کرده و همواره شکایت می کند – با این همه دردورنج وی بی حاصل خواهد بود ,هیچ درسی برای او به ارمغان نخواهدآورد.
بله ,هرکسی می تواند برای بقیه عمرش رودرروی یکی از درهای بیشماری بایستد که باید از میانش بگذرد ,ولی بایستی بداند, فقط تا آن لحظه زندگی کرده است.
شاید هنوز هم نفس بکشد ,راه برود ,بخوابد ,بخورد – ولی با کمترین لذتی ,چون پیشتر ازنظرروحی مرده و خود خبرندارد.
تا اینکه روزی ,مثل مرگ روحی اش ,مرگ فیزیکی اش نیز فرا می رسد ,درآن لحظه خدا خواهد پرسید :با زندگی ات چه کردی ؟
همه ما بایستی به این سؤال پاسخ دهیم,
.”و وای برآنهایی که پاسخشان این باشد که “من تنها بیرون در ایستادم
because as I rested on mount zion
& gazed to the forbidden east
my spirit would return to me
telling of a beauty too painful to forbear
yet even if I could somehow turn away
in the hope that it would fade
bewildered eyes left staring
at unwritten love’s blank page
deny my heart its voice to sing
play the world’s charade
memories of a broken dream
a single deadly shard
set truth free to penetrate
such thinly veiled disguise
no reflection of a soul
in the missing lover’s eyes
My prayer for Iran
Is that she may be blessed
And freed from the fear
Of an ignorant West
oh dear, I am so much like the victim…when God asks what I did with my life I will have to say, “I thought the point was that you wanted to experience life through me..and so you did…angst ridden, traumatic and chaotic !” .
I though I had masters before …. but its not that simple really ….because I have teachers and also Im a teacher …. so sometimes Im a student of life …. sometimes a teacher. But most Im a student of life …. I will learn new things all my life I believe ;-)
Love and light Jessica
At 27, I do not know where the Angel of Death is at, but I know here is how I will respond to that final question:
I entered as many doors as I can and took something out of it at every occassion to carry with me as I crossed bridges while destroying some of them after I reached the other end. Then on I went until I finally reached Your gates, tired but satisfied. The journey was challenging but went just as fine. Now here I am, a victor of life – complete.
I love your Master dear Paulo!!!, he’s so wise and full of Knowledge!!!
and you are walking his same path!!!
Thank you for sharing this.
love
cris
Unfortunately I never remained standing at door, I try to live as I had always lived, but I can’t to live routine. My life like a river in flood drives me, I have never time for tedium, I never aroused events, but events always aroused me, and I accept the challenge. I ask myself how can many people live a easy routine, a customary life without challenge,? Every day is a challenge, or am I a crazy woman? Why can’t I live a customary life,? Often my customary husband says that I am an impossible woman, because I accept every challenge and fight for our life, I fight for defending my ideas, my dreams. My husband thinks we are lucky, we must live accepting every thing,, the oldness, the monotony, the illusory easy life, my husband does’nt see the difficult events, ” he remains standing at door “, he believes oldness a customary wisdom, but he is only tired to fight, like many young people he prefered to live a tedious life and called it wisdom and happy routine, I am an old dreamer, crazy artist, an old whife, but I am happily and truly alive, I love life, like a river in a flood I drive him and my family fearless to the true life.
..know that boredom is often a period of brooding, a time for thinking seriously about what is happening in the now…it’s disguised as ‘boredom’ because it’s purpose is to kick me into life again…I very rarely feel bored, but in winter I feel it more..it’s the time of shedding, getting rid and preparing for the new birth of summer…It’s the mustering of energy to flow in a new direction, the bored tedious bit…is like the stagnant pool..have to leap out of it. Need to create so that the boredom is replaced with the journey into the unknown, the feeling of opening again…the pure cold water on my face.
Tedium serves as a reminder that I could be doing something else…. being me differently.
i dont want to stand infront of the doors. i want to see what is there behind those doors and windows though i know standing there is safe and routine, but i want to know cos “thats is the real way of living l ife”.
Thank you!
dear Paulo,
To this word “routine”, I don’t fully agree with your master.
“routine” is a neutral word, if you put negative feeling inside, it becomes “mundane” and if you want to glorify it, it is “ritual”.
I believe, we all need something that won’t change, or something that has a routine. Even the universe itself has its routine. If universe is an pure chaos, that winter and summer changes daily, or a night lasts for a week, nothing can live anymore.
We human are born with a need of routine, of the feeling of secure. If you ask any child psychologists or experienced child care persons, they will tell you: Babies need routine(ritual) in order to acquire self confidence and happiness and explorative nature. Namely, they need to know that there is some certainty of safely, some secure bonds with certain people, in order to be brave enough to explore new things.
There’s nothing wrong, that we seek some degree of security or routine(rituals) in our life. Our belief in god makes us feel secure, our routinely practice of hobbies (like Kyudo or Karate, or whatever) also gives us a feeling of certainty. Even our belief on ourselves or trust on others (like the trust between you and your master) is a feeling of safety.
Of course, no safety lasts forever, and the world changes constantly, and we are also born to develop further. But still, I would never call the need of safety and routine “completely false” and say we can’t control anything of our life. It’s just going another extreme, nothing better than who believes he can completely control his life.
love
Yan
….each moment is precious
….IF…
we really .
…Do…..
Whatever….
we….Want to ….
“That”..
is THE moment…
we ACTUALLY LIVE…..!!
OurThoughts …when Enacted…..become
LIFE….
.
lo importante es siempre intentar a pesar de las cataratas.Dios saben muy bien los méritos y defectos de cada hombre, como hombre, por qué todo el mundo disfruta de su bondad inmerecido.No olvidemos que el primero en entrar en el Reino de los cielos fue un ladrón arrepentido.
Pido disculpas por mi mal español.
Son tan hermosas esas palabras y me llegan mucho al corazon lamentablemente hay personas que llegan a estar muertas espiritualmente y aunque uno lucha siempre por vencer ese miedo en ellos no es facil cuando uno de ellos es el gran amor de tu vida .. Gracias por esas palabras muy ciertas
Experience This..Moments precious quality..What does it offer
Insight how precious.. A moment of awareness.. So enlightening
Be in the moment.. Without fear or fantasy.. Present to yourself
All you need ask is..Who’s aware of this moment..That you answer to
Only with the Christ it is possible to feel safe.
God doesn’t force to make a choice, and offers us something the best. In Him calm, confidence of tomorrow, joy, peace.
Only in God life!
I am aware that I have got into the habit of subduing my desires; what I am is no longer ‘me’. I am aware of everything that is going on with my soul….and yet I keep doing it. Its so wrong.
This is beautiful, thank you for sharing this profound thought, I am at the crossroads of my life now, I feel like staying in my safe haven, but I know I have to go forth move forward and step outside my comfort zone! :)
Lots of love, prayers and best wishes from India,
Vasu
boa reflexão,eu responderia….fiz tudo oque estava ao meu alcance,e fiz tudo oque minha alma desejava naquele momento,se é errado ou certo,não sei, mas que repetiria tudo novamente sim,pois tédio não é uma palavra que combina com minha vida….e que assim seja
What is boredom?
Is it not the loss of curiosity about life and love of life?
Thank you for writing all these wonderful books – they influence my daylife and my dreamlife.
That was important for me to read as I am asking myself that very same question: ‘what did I do with my life?’ Now followed by ‘what else can I do with my life?’ Work to be done!
How true and encouraging words. I’ve taken a long time to recognize my situation and finally getting serious about it. The problem was that I was too attached to a dream that has run dry and my situation demands that I alter course or be shipwrecked.
I will drop the sails and flow with the current I was resisting.
simply put it you are the best and this is indeed very inspiring. Thank you so much for your encouragement and your books. The advice you give us through them. love Avantika :)
If God will ask me: “What did you do with your life?”
I will reply: “I broke the glass.”
God will ask: “what did you do with your life?”
I will say: “I was there. I was aware. I watched You play at human being.”
dear paulo,
it reminds me of a poem i heard a long time ago !
THIS MORNING FEAR CAME KNOCKING AT MY DOOR,
FATE ANSWERED AND THEY’RE WAS NOBODY THERE .
have a good sunday
I`m happy. I understand that I must be happy. I may enjoy what I am and have. I can do all the things I like to do. I must be no other person. I` may not love me. I` II go my way. Thank aou Paulo Coelho
Silence and stillness help to dip into spirit to make you alive and enthusiastic about your passions.
Love
true.
it is the busy mind that so often talks “garbage” that says “boredom”.
Hermosa reflexión,,, todo lo que leo me encanta, cuantas veces uno deja de lado sus deseos, por seguir en una vida cómoda y segura y no se anima andar otros caminos….
I have read most of your books. They inspire me to search and experience more from my life. Love to read your books. Well said about boredom.
I have been through it sometimes. The last book I read was “Aleph”. It make we wonder if I could know the past connections with some people in my present life.
Thank you Mr Coelho.