Julia, a myspace friend, sent me an email with this title. I wanted to know who wrote the text in the message, and decided to check the Web for the author: Mircea Cartarescu. Guess what? In the few languages that I can read (English, French, Portuguese, Spanish), women are discussing this subject!
I checked on the Internet and guess what I discovered? That there are many discussion groups on this subject! In other words, nowadays women are looking for reasons to fall in love with the opposite sex. As a man who agrees with some of these reasons, I made a list based on what they say:
We love men because they can’t fake an orgasm, even if they wanted to.
Because they will never understand us, yet even so they go on trying.
Because they still manage to see our beauty, even when we ourselves no longer believe it.
Because they understand equations, politics, maths and economics, but not the feminine heart.
Because they are lovers who only rest when we have had (or pretend to have had) pleasure.
Because they manage to raise sport to something bordering on religion.
Because they are never afraid of the dark.
Because they insist on fixing things that are beyond their capacity, and dedicate themselves to this with the same enthusiasm as an adolescent, and get frustrated when they don’t succeed.
Because they are like pomegranates: most of them is impossible to digest, but the seeds are delicious.
Because they never comment on what the neighbors might think.
Because we always know what they are thinking, and when they open their mouth they say exactly what we imagined they would.
Because they never dreamed of torturing themselves wearing high heels.
Because they love to explore our body and conquer our soul.
Because a 14-year-old girl can leave them speechless, and a 25-year-old woman can tame them quite effortlessly.
Because they are always attracted by extremes: the opulent or the ascetic, warriors or monks, artists or generals.
Because they do absolutely everything possible to try to hide their weaknesses.
Because a man’s biggest fear is not being a man (it never crosses a woman’s mind not to be a woman).
Because they always eat everything on their plate, and don’t feel guilty about it.
Because they take great delight in completely uninteresting matters, such as what happened at work, or different makes of automobiles.
Because they have shoulders where we can rest our heads and sleep without much effort.
Because they are at peace with their bodies, except for small, insignificant things like growing bald and getting fat.
Because they are incredibly courageous in front of insects.
Because they never lie about their age.
Because despite everything they try to demonstrate, they can’t live without a woman.
Because when we tell one of them “I love you”, they always ask us to explain exactly how.
One reader, Kristen, claims that we know absolutely nothing about feminine nature, and sends us the following list:
1 – We women are born detectives. In our eyes, all men are suspect and their adventures will end up being discovered – it’s just a matter of time.
2 – Even if we are not in love with you, hearing “I love you” is a balm to our souls. And if you don’t say it, we will notice and become sad.
3 – The same thing happens with “you are beautiful”. It takes less than two seconds to say these three magical words, which can change our nightmares into real fairy tales.
4 – If we ask what clothes we should wear, don’t be annoyed if we put on exactly the opposite of what you chose – that’s part of our nature.
5 – At a party we are capable of scanning the whole room in less than a minute to find out what interests us. Just watch.
6 – We think of sex with the same compulsion as men – or maybe even more so. The only difference is that we don’t show it.
7 – If we don’t accept immediately an invitation to dinner or a first date, don’t worry – we just need a few days to lose the extra kilos that we always feel are ruining our lives.
8 – Women always remember everything. If you ask when we met, none of us will say: “at a party”. We will say: “it was a Tuesday, right after a dinner where they served salad and chicken broth, and you were wearing a black blazer and designer shoes, and so on.
9 – However much love we are capable of giving, there are seven days when we want to be far from everything and everybody. You have two options: tie yourself to a lamp-post and wait till the storm is over, or else go the nearest jeweler’s and buy a present. We recommend the second option.
10 – We have as much power of reasoning as men do. But we don’t need to make this evident, otherwise you will feel insecure. Women who do that end up alone.
11 – We love all kinds of hair on the male body, although waxing is our favorite torture.
12 – We hate making love when we don’t feel like it, but we do it anyway, and you will never be able to notice the difference.
13 – Play with our pets and our children, and we will play with you. Ignore them, and we will ignore you too.
14 – Women are equipped with X-ray vision. We can look at hard, dark eyes and discover the child hiding behind them. We can stare at angel-blue eyes and discover the demon that lies there. We know when men are pretending to be sleeping from tiredness or – more obviously – when they are pretending not to be sleeping with someone else.
15 – Not all women want marriage and children. Many just want orgasms and pets.
16 – When delicateness is genuine, it can melt our hardened hearts.
17 – If we have some problem to discuss with you, don’t try to give us the solution, we already have one. It’s just a pretext to prevent the relationship ending in boredom.
After reading all this I would love to fall in love. I am a hard heart and haven’t fallen head-over-heals yet. I truly wish that there is a magical someone for me who can make me feel wanted.
there is one coming, watch out ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
I love a man because only him can look into my eyes and see me for what I am and see me the way I want to be seen. I love my man for making me feel like I need to improve to please him and thus, makes me a better person because of his love for me. I love a man for his toughness and kindness. For his strength and vulnerability. For his being unattainable and yet, the moment he finds the right one, his heart stays with her forever.
I love a man for his pure soul. For his strenght and for his weakness. For being a man and at the same time for being a child. I love his smile. I love the way he touches me with a sweet caressness on me. In his eyes, I can see who he really is. I love his support. I love being able to give him all that I am.
Dear All,
when we fall in love someone, we do because of who they are, because they are maybe our soulmates, not because they aren’t afriad of something or because of sex or because we can fool them.
there are men who understand women, maybe they don’t show it.
but the list up there is Steriotyping Men and even women!
With all my love, Amy
-Because their eyes can take you to faraway lands and feel those soils as if they were your own.
-Because their laughter has the mirth of a Celtic harp.
-Because they are who they are.
Why its so hard to understand our friends?
I really enjoyed reading this. I love men because with one glance, one touch, one kiss they are capable of reminding me why I love being a woman.
I love a man because he makes me feel – more than I could ever feel alone. I love a man for seeming to know less than me, but also seeming to have more power. I love a man because he seems to bring me closer to God. I love a man because I am more beautiful with him than I am without him. I love a man becaus he makes me feel that I have a perfect pearl inside me that was never tained by anything.
so sad all these points. have nothing to do with feminine. Poor Goddess.
we litereally hate to make love wen we r not welling to
The reason some men hides thiere weakness i think might be becouse when we do show ourself as week the woman we love tend to flee.
I reckon its something much like an anchient instinct thats left inside us telling the woman that the man is suposed to be strong and abel to protect her and her offspring, in a modern society this can become a bit malplaced.
Im not baseing this on scientific facts nor am i saying this applies to everyone, im just baseing this on observation alone.
Personally I rather let my tears fall openly and make the love of my life flee then miss the opportunity of getting comfort from the true love of my life.
WHY WE LOVE MEN..yes, i agree to what i just have read above…. because when we have men in our lives, we feel secure enough.. having them around can make us happy and they can appreciate more of the beauty of a woman inside and out. Women can rely on them more, count on them, and can make even stronger in facing obstacles in life.. The only thing i can’t understand is that why almost all men try to hide their weaknesses in life.. if they show their being weak in some point in life it does not mean it makes them less a man…
Why we love women:
We love women because they can’t separate love and sex; though they may appear to do so, deep down every man knows how a woman truly feels.
Because the world doesn’t need to make sense for them to be happy and at peace; they only need to feel loved.
Because they are often afraid of the dark (or seem to be).
Because they accurately show us the truth of how we feel, by merely being them, even when they are not being true to themselves.
Because all arguments they ever start are only a question of the truth and depth of your love for them.
Because they can raise a man much higher than their high heels would suggest.
Because if ever they have true determination to satisfy a man, they surely will.
Because they will inspire us to move a mountain but be completely satisfied with merely a strawberry dipped in chocolate.
Because they believe love is the answer to everything.
Because in them, all forms of judgement and discernment can happily fall under the heading of nurturing.
Because their hearts are the strongest thing on the planet whilst also the most fragile.
Because they already know exactly what the neighbours think.
Because what they see in half a second of meeting us is whether we may be capable of conquering their soul.
Because they can be multiple people and many things, and yet let a lover know her well.
Because they know how much more important romance is for a man to fall in love than for a woman.
Because they don’t understand football, even when they pretend to or like it.
Because they can withhold who they are forever, or reveal it all in a single moment.
Because they can touch an arm once lightly, and be remembered for it forever.
Because whether they provoke us in a fight or in play, it is with equal enthusiasm.
Because you will never own a woman’s heart, but she may give it to you completely for always.
Because they know how we feel about them, even if they are in another country.
Because they will more likely sleep with a man they don’t know than a man they love who doesn’t yet love them in return.
Because if a man says, “Don’t call me” they will find a reason to call him that would be impossible for him to fault.
Because they know that when a man is courting her, he is also falling in love with himself.
Because they will always flush out the tiniest insect.
Because a hundred of them can all fall for the same man at exactly the same moment.
Because they believe showing their weaknesses is a sign of true strength.
Because they would take the time to provide us with a list of reasons they love men, to let us know the world is perfect as it is.
Oh my, I don’t know if you wrote this yourself but it was great.. actually kind of funny as well… but nevertheless ALL true.. Gave me a bit of hope that maybe someone will notice that in me someday.
Wow, this is beautiful. There is no greater feeling than to feel understood.
I think I understand what simon is saying too, I can be very male when I want to and maybe it is social conditioning that makes me warm to your appreciation of “Me” as above. But warm to it I do !!!
please write more…
nice one! and yes, it’s kinda funny and this just made my night. =) God bless!
Thank you Andrew for this beautifully written list of reasons… u made me feel inspired.
Wow….
amazing list. I don’t believe number 14. Too many stories to the contrary in movies, books, etc.
PS – I like your book cover. I’ll have to check out the story idea; title sounds like something my mom would like.
Well I love to read all these sentences but does love need to have a reason?
Love
All Ways
Hildegarde
I must say reading this leaves me with a heavy heart.
I feel they’re all truths, but I’m certain most reference the masculine and the feminine, rather than male and female.
Something I know you have written much about.
I also fear many of the above are, at worst, tiring obstacles, that only serve to fuel misunderstanding.
I do appreciate it is how many feel, and I’m not suggesting they are wrong. Simply that the seed of those feelings may not be their gender.
I have no issue with roles, but I’ve always been far more excited by the truths beneath them.
And from my own experience, it’s often insecurity that invites me to be comforted by such things. And they remain comforting to me. But at a cost if I spend too much time in their company, I find.
I can honestly say, as a man that I’m tempted not to leave this post for fear of seeming less of one.
But I must. And in doing so at least settle my feelings on one of the comments.
I have to add I’ve loved each and every one of your books.
Si