Paulo Coelho

Stories & Reflections

On forgiving

Author: Paulo Coelho

by Susan

“You have to forgive otherwise you will be deemed as bitter” but forgiving would mean that you’ve succumbed to the wrongdoings of the other party which I would never do.
When i believe a person has done me wrong, I would very often express this to them. And if they do not accept/respect “my hurt feelings” I would be very unforgiving towards them too.

When someone says “sorry” to me, I always ask them specifically:
1) Please explain what you are apologizing for?
2) Why did u do what you did?
3) Do you regret it?
4) How will you make up for it?
5) Do you promise not to repeat this?

You will be surprised most of the times, the wrong-doers dont know what they are apologizing for and just say “sorry” without meaning it from the heart but just want to “make you not hate them…” but they will still continue being who they are.
Sometimes, we just need to get EVEN to satisfy ourselves and teach them a lesson.

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