Paulo Coelho

Stories & Reflections

Forgiving and forgetting

Author: Paulo Coelho

Nicosia (December 20, 2010 )
f I must say the way I’m doing, I will say that I forgive but I don’t forget; not because I want to remember the bad things that hapenned to me, but because my heart is not ready to forget…

I also think that forgetting is the supreme way of forgiving but it must be a natural process that comes (if it comes) without our intervention. When we forget something that has been fogiven it means that we evolved in our spiritual way to such an extend that we are very different from the one we were in the past, when we were hurt.

I think that we should give ouselves the freedom to forget or not the things that happenned to us, so that our souls be free to follow their way…

mizfee (August 3, 2010 at 9:00 am)

Forgiving someone who has wronged you, betrayed you, is a very hard thing to do. I struggle with this daily. But I find that the act of forgiveness is not something you do as a gift for the other person, but as a gift for yourself.
You hold on so tight to your anger, your principles, that you just clench so tightly at this thing you can’t let go.
How do you find peace if you’re constantly reminding yourself how badly the other person treated you? Yet that person has moved on, created a new life, finding happiness in his own way. Let go, let go of the anger, and you can then unclench the hand and reach for something else, something new, hopefully something better. Maybe you don’t forget, but over time the memory of the pain fades, and it doesn’t hurt so much anymore.
Then forgive and move forward.
Justice happens when that pain doesn’t affect you anymore and the powerful memory of days long gone don’t hang around too long.

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